Author's note: From now on, every chapter will start with a swear word. It's becoming a small tradition for me. Thank you for writing reviews, it may mean nothing to you but a lot to me.

Oh yeah, I realize I've been misspelling Deidara's name.

*Bows*

PLEASE FORGIVE ME!

"Damn, things keep on getting weirder and weirder. Why do people keep on calling me Alice?" Deidara thought. Sasori walked towards him "You're just in time for tea Alice, do take a seat" he offered as he pulled up a chair. Kakuzu mumbled something about the importance of punctuality. Deidara sat obediently "What the hell is going on Sasori?" Sasori sipped his tea coolly "I just told you, you're in Wonderland now. They call me the mad hatter, Alice, I suggest you call me by that name as well" Deidara flushed for no apparent reason "Sa-" Sasori grimaced, "I mean Hatter" Deidara corrected himself "Why are you calling me Alice? Why does everyone call me Alice?".

Sasori frowned "Is that not your name?".

"No, it's not. My name is Deidara"

"Dei-dar-a" Sasori pronounced every syllable, he sipped some tea "Isn't that a boy's name?"

"I'm a guy!" Deidara almost yelled

Sasori spit white mist into Deidara's face. He burst out laughing "Oh Alice, you tell the strangest things"

"It's true" Deidara stammered

"That's preposterous Alice! Why else would you be wearing the dress I made especially for you? You say the silliest things, sometimes I wonder who's really mad"

Deidara blushed, there was obviously no point in making sense of him. Kakuzu checked his pocket watch "I mustn't stay any longer, I must be off" He walked four steps in front of him then sunk into the ground. Deidara went over to the spot he disappeared. "A rabbit hole?" Deidara thought. "The burrows in Wonderland are everywhere. They allow a fast and easy method of transport. Although a bit messy" Sasori explained. Deidara was curious "Listen Sa… Hatter! I've got to get out of here! How exactly do you leave wonderland?"

Sasori thought for a moment. "I suppose you'd have to ask The blue queen for permission to leave. Then you'd have to visit the white" he coughed loudly "King for permission. Then you have permission to exit Wonderland".

Deidara sighed "But how will I get there?".

Sasori gave him a puzzled look "Isn't it obvious Alice? You have to take the burrows"