Summary: Lily demonstrates to Alice how James eats his strawberries.

Chapter Three

Alice didn't see how sexily James ate the strawberries so I had to show her. I ran down to lunch quickly and stole a bowl of strawberries from the Hufflepuff table. Managing to only bump into two people, one of which was Sirius who felt the need to tell me an elaborate and pointless story (which I completely forgot as I was trying to hide the strawberries, to keep from future humiliation, behind my back) and the other was Marlene who just wanted my Potions homework.

The Common Room was near empty, save three first years and a fourth year.

I darted passed them and into my dorm, dropping my bag on the ground.

After locking the door and charming it to stay so, I pulled a small stool over to the mirror on my dresser.

Within the first five minutes I realized that I liked strawberries much better when they were coated in chocolate.

Then I realized that eating strawberries sexily is a really hard job.

The first time I took too big of a bite. Okay, that's a lie. The first time I ate it my way because I really just wanted to eat a strawberry.

The second time I took too big of a bite and the third time I nibbled it like a rat. And that's not sexy, nor is it the way James eats his strawberries.

By the fourth time I just stuck the whole bloody thing in my mouth. It was so frustrating, damn James Potter.

By strawberry number eleven I wanted to puke.

By seventeen, there were strawberries coming out of ears. At least it felt like there would be soon if I didn't stop eating them.

At number twenty-one, basically, I had mastered the art of eating a strawberry as sexily as James.

I did two more just for practice when the door handle started to rattle. I looked at in shock.

"Hello? Is someone in there?" a voice said from behind it. I recognized that voice as Mary.

"Yes."

"Lily? Could you open the door? It's locked."

I looked at the bowl of strawberries and then back to the door.

"What for?"

Mary laughed. "Well, I need to get in!"

I remained quiet for a moment. "Can't it wait?"

"No! I've got to get my books for History."

"What's going on?" another voice said from the top of the stairs. It was Marlene.

"Lily's locked herself in there."

"What for?"

"I've no idea!"

"Come on, Lily! Let us in!" Marlene started knocking on the door.

"Can't you come back later?" I asked, searching for a place to stash the strawberries.

"NO!" they both shouted at me.

"Oi, Evans!" I heard Sirius call from downstairs. "What are you doing up there? Eating strawberries?"

Oh Gods! They did manage to get a working camera in here!

I started breathing quickly.

No, no, they couldn't have. They were just kidding, anyway. Sirius was just taking a wild guess. He doesn't really know. He's just being Sirius.

I grabbed my bag and stuffed the bowl and the remaining two strawberries in it, hiding it beneath the sweater that I carried around. I uncharmed the door and ran out through the middle of Marlene and Mary who both gave me curious looks.

I ignored them and rushed over to Alice. She was sitting over by the window working on her Herbology homework.

Interrupting her, I said, "I've done it!"

She looked up at me. "Hey, Lily. What have you done now?"

"I've mastered the art of eating a strawberry like James! Now you can see why it's so sexy!"

"I don't want to see why it's so sexy."

"Well, why not?" I asked.

"Because."

"But Alice, it really is gorgeous! It looks even better when he does it, of course, but I'm just demonstrating."

She sighed. "Get it over with, then."

I grinned and pulled the bowl out of my bag. Alice raised an eyebrow at me.

I held up the strawberry. "Now watch what I do with my lips, and where I bite it. See how I don't start at the bottom?" Alice was watching wide-eyed. "Alice, what are you doing? You didn't even see the..."

Oh Gods.

I followed her eyes over my shoulder to see James standing behind me with a smug look.

He was staring at me and the strawberry in my hand.

I closed my eyes, hoping to wake up back in bed this morning.

Nope. It didn't work.

James just continued to grin smugly at me.

"Oh Gods," I mumbled. I started biting my lip.

It tasted like strawberries.

Behind James stood Sirius and Remus. "Did Prongs just fall in love with himself?" Sirius asked Remus.

"It was either him, or Lily again."

"Oh."

"Does that surprise you?"

"Not at all."

Alice was trying to keep a straight face.

This was when I realized that I should have been practicing my apparation instead of eating strawberries as sexily as James. I wouldn't even be in this mess.

"Evans," James said to me with a smirk.

I looked up at him. "Um, yes?"

He grinned wider when he saw that I was squirming.

"You think the way that I eat strawberries is sexy?"

I started biting my lip again, stalling. "No... no that'd be ridiculous!"

Sirius started laughing.

"What?" I asked, hoping that it was something to change the subject.

"Prongs, didn't you pick up that habit from me?"

Oh Gods.

Alice, James, and Remus started laughing.

"James does it sexier!" I blurted out.

Oh. Gods.

If there were ever a time for the floor to open up and swallow me whole, it'd be now.

Please, Merlin?

Open the floor, come on.

Gods, what did I ever do to you?

Alice's jaw was on the floor and all laughter stopped.

I really know how to quiet down a room.

James stood there shocked and Sirius pounded a fist into the air.

"YES!" Sirius shouted.

We all looked at him.

"What?" James asked, partially shocked but mainly proud.

"I knew I'd be the cause of you two finally going at each other."

My face was as red as the Popsicle I ate once when I was seven. It was the reddest Popsicle that I'd ever eaten and it actually tasted like cherries but- Sorry.

"It's all in the work of the tongue," James said, winking at me.

About that floor opening up...

Alice started laughing.

"How about a demonstration," Sirius offered. I shot him a glare and went to run away.

But apparently Merlin is mean. Apparently he opened the floor just a bit and then closed it, causing my feet to be stuck inside.

Either that or I was just frozen solid when James walked over to me (ever so sexily) and planted the best kiss of my life right there. On my lips.

Oh Gods.

He pulled away and this time I felt like melting into a puddle on the floor.

"Oh, Gods," I said, turning redder still but feeling very good about it.

"What?" he asked.

"You taste like them too?!"

He laughed.

"They are my favorite fruit."

"Unfortunately, I don't think I'll ever be able to eat another strawberry. Ever again."

"Why not?" James asked.

"I ate twenty-two strawberries to pull that off. No more. Ever."

A/n: Okay guys, chapter three is here! Yay! Cheers! Rejoicing! Anyway, I originally wrote a different chapter three and posted it for, oh, about 3 minutes. You might have gotten the alert in your mailbox. Sorry about that. It was pretty bad. If any of you did manage to read it, erase if from your memory. This instant! Start erasing.

Thanks.

Anyway, this is the end unless someone can up with another chapter on something amusing that has to do with strawberries.

I'm still always looking for ideas.

26 down and 4 to go. Yeah.

Thanks for reading, and I love reviews!

Much love and your own James who tastes like strawberries,

Siriusly Klutzy