Don't own them. How disappointing.
It's short, I know. I apologize!
Tarsus IV Fic Alert!
This story will contain whump, badassery, angst, and sea monkeys. Or perhaps squirrel monkeys. Well actually, any kind of peculiar creature. Review and give me your recommendation and I'll incorporate it into the story.
p.s. forgive me for my short obsession with parentheses. I'm ADD and it was the easiest way to stay on track and still add those little tidbits that popped into my (admittedly disturbing) mind. One thing I will say here: It was a TEDDY BEAR. Someone missed that and asked me why the bear hadn't been dragged off by scavengers (Not that it wouldn't be just as dead if it were a bear...)
p.p.s. Thank you to all of the followers and favoriters (that should definitely be a word). Those who reviewed I will respond to personally on my own since otherwise this chapter will be about ten thousand words long...
...
"Spock, your eyebrows have gone entirely vertical," Jim slurred with a quiet chuckle.
"You are displaying actions that do not compute properly with what I know of you, James."
Kirk froze (Actually, he was probably swaying like a latin dancer at that point, because his head felt funny, and for god's sake would someone stop shaking him! Bones was looking at him funny. Bones were looking at him funny. Dear lord, there were two of them! But one was dead and… Had he been drinking? The world was swirling funnily, more fun-like but not fun at all? funny-lee?).
"Call me Jim." He said, and then the world went dark.
…
Eleven years, Three months, and Eleven Days
"This is your new home," The words were dreadfully final as James glanced around the barren landscape.
"You've been relocated to a foster home on this planet under assumed names until the time where Mrs. Kirk may return and resume her position of guardianship over James. In this manner, the media will be dissuaded from using your story as fodder." The bald official was glaring down his nose more pretentiously than James Kirk- Jimmy T. Gardner he corrected himself- had ever seen anyone accomplish. (Why is it always the bald ones with the complexes? Jimmy wondered. This guy, Romulans, Uncle Frank, Santa- Self absorbed, violent, child abuser, child stalker…Suddenly the image of a klingon flashed through James- Jimmy's skull. Maybe it wasn't the amount of hair missing that determined the character, but the amount of forehead showing.)
"Welcome to Tarsus IV."
Jimmy felt a clammy hand grab his, and glanced at Johnny. His eleven year old cousin may have been younger, but they were already standing eye to eye. Jimmy imagined he saw something (fear?) in Johnny's eyes. It could have been a number of other things. The eyes may be the window to the soul, but the facial expression is easier to read.
"So," Jimmy forced a smile (he had mastered his own facial expressions long ago), "This is Tarsus?"
….
Once more, the good doctor summed up the situation perfectly. "Well, shit."
There was a flurry of movement as Bones and Spock knelt beside their fallen Captain.
"If you insist upon using vulgar language when we converse, I shall join you in your endeavor." As Spock rolled Kirk so his head rested on the man's knees and checked his pulse, his forehead knitted in concentration (his eyebrows were now so convoluted that they looked like thin twin caterpillars weaving across his forehead). "I believe the terminology I am searching for is 'What in the fuck was that?'" It's slow, Spock thought worriedly as he checked the captain's pulse. He paused and shrugged his shoulders. Then again, most human things are.
It was Bones' turn for his eyebrows to shoot up at impossible distances as he searched his bag for his tricorder, holding back a laugh.
"Not quite, Spock... Dammit." He pricked his finger on the Starfleet comm pin that Kirk had come up with.
"I am unfamiliar with the complexities of human vulgarities, however from various observations of human behavior I have recorded no instances of vocalization reminiscent of 'What in the "dammit" was that?', Doctor."
Bones grabbed the tricorder with a huff (why is it that whenever you need to find something it's always at the bottom of the heap? Chances are, that needle you want is probably at the bottom of the hay stack. Then again, the needle is smaller and heavier that hay, so it makes sense for it to be on the bottom), and moved over to Jim, worry lines growing around his mouth as he observed the captain.
"Not you, you green-blooded hobgoblin! Make yourself useful and call ahead to the medical bay while I scan him." Bones' eyes grew dark with apprehension as he peered at Jim's non-responsive pupils and examined the tricorder's readings.
"It appeared to me that the Captain's reaction was the result of syncoping, the partial or complete loss of consciousness with interruption of awareness of himself and his surroundings caused by a momentary lapse of blood oxygenation necessary to feed his brain, the effect of a situation similar to what is standard in post traumatic stress disorder patients experiencing a panic attack," Spock said calmly.
Bones' head rose as a growl emitted from the back of his throat. Caustic words laced with venom poured out of him. "James Tiberius Kirk does not just 'get emotional and faint'!" He exclaimed.
The tricorder beeped. Bones paled. "Get medical bay set." He barked. "Were you aware the captain was injured?" he hissed at Spock.
"I assumed he was of physically capable, although now I see I erred as the Captain has a ninety three percent injury occurrence rate after any confrontation. Logically, there was a good probability that he has sustained some form of injury."
"Injuries," Bone spoke. "Dammit, Jim! I'm a doctor, not a mind reader! Of course you're injured!" There was an uncomfortable moment of remembering. Remembering silence and radiation and death. And that damned fool James Kirk who almost broke Leonard McCoy's heart.
Concentrating on his patient, he almost didn't hear Spock say "Beaming up" or notice the sudden pandemonium as he and an unconscious Jim Kirk were beamed onto the transporter pad. (At the moment he wasn't remembering Jim's ominous words "This is Tarsus." ) All he could think of were the tricorder readings and wonder how in the world Kirk had gotten Andorian shingles and why there was a broken off stiletto heel in his side. And internal bleeding? Bruised kidney? Claw marks (…That definitely weren't from where Jim usually got them. Which was too bad. Those ninja chicks were pretty easy on the eyes. On the other hand, Jim had never been much for the whole Black Widow thing- which may or may not have something to do with the stiletto heel in his side...)? Only Jim.
(...Then there were the thirteen shurikens. Bones had always thought Starfleet shirts were too tight to smuggle weaponry. The scythe he had just thrown to the side had seemed to contradict that. Why couldn't Jim just be happy shooting people? They were just as dead whether killed by a phaser or... my God! Were those nunchucks? He was going to have to have a conversation with Sulu, he realized as he pulled out a retractable blade.)
The nurses bundled Jim onto the gurney (…seeming all too eager to examine his injuries, of course. Now, Jim was no stranger to having his clothes ripped off, but the fact that Chaplan was joined in her mission by Thomas, the new medical officer... Let's just say it's a good thing Kirk wasn't conscious. Both good and very, very bad.) and rushed him towards the med-bay, leaving a puzzled Spock behind.
As they were boarding the lift, Spock heard the tell-tale sounds of an awakening Jim Kirk- That would be laughter, distressed calls, and an undertone of sexual tension. Then again, that wasn't just present when Jim was awake. Even an unconscious Captain Kirk had been known to create some interesting situations. Sometimes especially an unconscious Jim Kirk.
...
"Well," Jim slurred at the two blurry figures looming above him, "Musta been a hell of a party. I normally don't do threesomes." ('Cept for Spring Break the year before graduation. And that was an exception to most things, including his prejudice against admirals. Mostly because- as it turns out- female admirals, though a rare species, are not yet extinct. It was also the start of some things, such as an intense hatred for sea monkeys. Oh, and that time just before the Khan incident. Also not mentioned. It made Spock uncomfortably emotional. Like homosexual subtext and violations of the prime directive.). A new face- Bones, his mind supplied- intruded on his field of vision. Kirk sat up- or tried to. "Bones?!" He yelped. "Not you, too?" (Bones had helped him burn the pictures from that Spring Break. They had subsequently set off the fire alarms and finished Spring Break off with a wet T-shirt contest of school-wide proportions. Those pictures Kirk had kept.)
Bones didn't reply. His face seemed oddly grim.
(Oddly grim? Kirk remembered the first time they met: "I might throw up on you." Bones was always grim. It was his cynicism that made him so wonderfully refreshing to Jim. When he told Bones he got the Enterprise back, Bones didn't congratulate him at first. No... Bones greeted the news with a groan. "Guess this means you're dragging me back to that godforsaken wasteland again?" Kirk had grinned. "You could always stay here." They both knew the offer was pointless. "Course not, you damn fool. Who else is going to keep you from killing yourself?" Bones didn't know how true that was.)
A distantly familiar nervous laugh echoed above him. It wasn't Bones. It was someone else. (So many people! This must have been even worse than Spring Break. Jim shuddered.) Someone from the past.
"Calm down, J.T.!" The voice was near panicked.
Kirk froze as it all rushed back: The enterprise, the ninjas, Tarsus... "Call me Jim!" He growled, and he was out again.
Thomas Leighton, a doctor now, stared down at the face flushed with fever, the strong jaw, and the half-lidded blue eyes always filled with a dark, calculating amusement, as if he was laughing at the world. Thomas brushed the patient's hair back as he flashed back to the one time he saw those eyes empty, the one time he saw those eyes as dead as the boy they belonged to...
Thomas, who was once Tom but never would be again, understood the words more than anyone could guess.
"Call me Jim."
But Jim would always be J.T. to Thomas. Always.
...
**Amended: I am responding to reviews on here anyways. I am sorry to those of you who say it makes the chapters too long. But screw that. There's a magic invention called scrolling. I'd advise you whiners use it. :P Just kidding. You know I love you. So short responses:
goddessa39: See above. That's where the sheer awesome comes from. Jim's proclivity for nice climaxes. Of all kinds. And it's a teddy bear, lovey.
Kyla: Hey, babe. It appears you overestimated me. But I overestimated how good I look on the hood of a car. And my best friend had a brain tumor. And my dad went to prison. I've been a busy little bee. But I'm back. And I blame you for that. You and your determination to guilt me into typing. I guess our love just can't be denied.
AngelQueen: What can I say? I weave like a pro. How does that song go? "If you're weaving, don't look back. Weave me like you mean it!"
becca579: I can't wait either. ;)
Wise-wren-owl: Angstyangstangstyness is on its way.
poisonivy7: We'll kick some space ninja ass, thank you. And there was fainting. But he had an excuse. Ninjas and all.
WhatDoYouThinkIKnow: I like your tone. That was flirting by the way. If you math, I love you. I'm in it for the differentiation, baby.
Deanaholic1: Why, hello. What's a fan like you doing in a place like this? Thanks for the review. Here's some virtual gumdrops and some sexy Dean in tights. I also just baked brownies, btw. I'm willing to share.
Pumacura: Well, I did it. Seeeeee?
Aneeta Potter: It took me a while, but it's made to order!
Undead Artist: I am glad to be stuck with you. Very glad. We share a specific interest. In whumping. This…? Is nice. This is very nice.
Sherman and Company: …and I like Spock's eyebrows, Sher.
Spinal cracker: Seeing me? :) you are an inspiration.
Zeynel: Biji da yo.