A Message Between Us

(Yamamoto Takeshi)

He was late, as always. Between practice, school, practice, friends, more practice and family, I just got a few moments with him and he was always late. No matter if ti was to go to the amusement park or to have tea, he will never be on time and I will wait for him as a cheap imitation of Hachiko, What is wrong with me? But in the end is my fault.

I could go to watch his practices or even become the baseball team manager, but I'm not fond to sports and I don't want to lie to myself just to spend more time with him, it's not like me and sounds creepy.

I could hang out with him and his friends a lot more so we can come to know each other better, but it seems like they have a secret and don't want anyone to learn about it. I also have my own secrets that I don't want not evan a single soul learn about, like my feelings towards Takeshi to get started, which means I can understand their feelings and I respect their decision.

Back to reality, since it is weird to wait for more than half an hour for some "non-special" friend outside a movie theater to see a movie that has already started, I walked away to a nearby convinience store to bought somthing to drink and snaks (because I'm starting to get hungry) before heading back home. As I wait in line a sign caught my attention "HELPER REQUESTED".

Then a wild idea popped into my head, I do need something to do afterschool to keep me away from thinking desperately about him and try to meet him in weird ways, and of course some more pocket money won't hurt at all. Well, I didn't like the idea of working at a convenience store, full of smelly food and every kind of customers, so I thought about the possibility of working at a book store; I love books and I knew that my best friend's relative owned one. Lucky me.

And probably in a no-so-distant future I could even become a famous writer... I was so lost in my train of thougth about my future-self that the message I got at that moment scared me to death.

"I'm sorry. Practice ended later than I thought it would. Where are you now? Takeshi."

Idiot.

"Never mind. I'll go another day to watch it. See you later!"

I started walking home once more, feeling that he really was the worst choice to fall in love with.

"Ain't you mad at me? I always fail to do what I have promised you I would do. Don't you feel we need to talk about that?

Takeshi"

Curse him. Of course I'm mad at him, How am I supposed to forgive him for always leaving me at the end of his priority list? But right now I'm more mad at me for not telling my true feelings.

"Hey! I got loads of friends to go out and have fun, take it easy. It's not the end of the world if you can't make it."

Before reaching home I got other two more messages from him, that I didn't bother to check, I was too angry to do so. Then I recived a call, it was him.

- Yo! Are you Ok? Why don't you reply to my messages?

- Oh!? My bad. Did you send more messages? I was lost in my own world that I didn't realize at all.

For some reason I didn't want him to know how hurt, pissed and desperate I am right now, so I lied to him once more, as I always do when there is something I want to keep a secret. Not like he seems to care or even realize.

- I see. Hahahahaha. Well, if you are free, Would you like to grab somthing to eat? I'm starving.

Damn it. Why does he have to use that chearful tone that I can't resist so easily?

- Mmm, You know? I'm already at home so... maybe...

- Hahahahaha. I know, I know. Look back.

And there he was, standing with the brightest smile he could give me and his free hand rubbing the back of his head sheepishly. I kept on changing my sight from him to my mobil more than a couple of times until I gave up and hung, walking over to him as I was thinking for the best excuse to avoid eating with him; if I were to go out with him it was most likely going to end up with me doing something stupid, like confessing.

- So? Wanna hang out for a bit? There is somewhere I want you to try out with me.

Even if he was talking so casually to me, he averted his eyes from mine, apparently mine will bring him down the second they met, or so I thought. Something weird on him, that for sure.

- Well,... I... to be honest... I already got some snaks in my way here so I'm not hungry.

I didn't know how to get out of this situation and his face told me it wasn't going to be an easy feature to achive. Now it was my turn to avoid his gaze, the danger of changing my mind was at it's peak.

- Ma, ma. Just stay with me, I don't like to eat alone. You can ask for something light, snaks ain't healthy food at all.

He took my hand and started to walk away from my door, I just could give up and let him lead the way. As always.

At a western style restaurant he ate a full portion of meat with vegetables and rice while I asked for an apple salad and a soda, sticking to the I'm-not-hungry plan (when I was truly dying for some of his juicy meat). No one of us said a word but our eyes meet several times and each of them felt like they wanted to scream all the things that weren't been said. Then, in the last exchange of glances, he left his food and kept his gaze at the table. Short after that a new message arrived.

"I'm terribly sorry about today's movie. I really wanted to watch it with you.

Takeshi."

As I was reading it over and over, he keep on looking at me waiting for an answer. Without watching my mobil I write the so waited answer and started eating again. As it was nothing.

"Why so persistent with that idea? I already told you it's not the end of earth."

"Yeah! But still, I feel uneasy knowing you would go out with some other guys. Am I just one more of the lot? You are an important frien to me.

Takeshi."

I wasn't sure if I have to feel happy about that message or just more depressed. But the only answer I could think of at the moment was...

"Fine. I will wait for your next free afternoon so we can watch the movie together. The snaks will be on you, so make sure you ain't late again."

He smiled at me when he was done reading the message and laugh in relief. I just giggled at his display.

As always he walks me home while trying to convince me to join a sport club's activitie, or any club at least. There is when I told him my idea of becoming a book store worker and my future plans as a writer.

- Then make sure to be next to me so I can be the first one to read all of your best sellers. I'll always be there to cheer for you.

Our relationship is odd, sometimes it even appear non-existant but, times like this made me think there is still hope.

As always.