December 29th, 2006. 2300 Hours.
Perfect. Everything is-was- perfect. In Raccoon City. What a joke! Raccoon City held an image of perfection that was hard to compete with. The roads were perfectly paved, every house was kept at its top condition, front yards and lawns were lusciously green and alive. The schools were internationally known for their academics. The population consisted of mostly scientists, doctors, lawyers, teachers, and police.
And Umbrella.
And zombies, flesh eating, hunger crazed animals with a lust for blood. Perfect they said? I don't know the meaning of the fucking word. I don't know what perfect is.
But I know what near perfection is. My nails scrap softly-absently- over a fragile, pale shoulder, my eyes staring at the naked body beside me, but not really seeing it. SHE is nearly perfect. Then again, in this life, anything that doesn't involve zombies, corrupt agents, or mutated man-eating flesh monsters is perfect. The irony here? She's probably the most involved with all of that than anyone left alive.
"You're awake?" Her softly spoken words tell me she doesn't wish to break me from my thoughts. Leaning over her shoulder, I give her a distracted smile in response. Really it's more of a grimace than a smile.
I never sleep. Not anymore. I can't. My mind is stuck in a loop. My body is exhausted and near breaking point but my mind is running circles around me. Carlos and LJ have warned me repeatedly that I need to rest, that I won't be any good to them if I can't fight. I always roll my eyes at the incompetent men; I could fight better than them with both my arms and a foot tied behind my back. I just need to stop thinking so much.
And that's exactly what I can't stop doing. For every little action I take, a million thoughts come back to haunt me. Now for instance. Back in the civilized world people always worried about the image they upheld. Do I look good? Should I wear this or that? What do they think of me? Did I impress him? Should I eat this? Drink that? Do this? DO that? It was all about appearances and reputation. Not for me. Not then, not now. In order to survive you have take what you want, what you need, and have no qualms about it. There's no room for courtesy or fairness or emotions. Life is like a stone, cold and hard.
"You should go back to sleep." I sigh tiredly, drinking in the sight of her lithe, naked form stretched out on the desert ground.
Death Valley. I have absolutely no idea how we ended up in this place but I like it. It kind of reminds me of her. Beautiful, mysterious, dangerous.
A killer in disguise.
"What is going on in that head of yours?" She says in a way that shows she's thinking out loud; not something she does very often. As a matter of fact, I dare say she's even more aloof than I am. I suddenly find myself subject to her scrutinizing gaze.
"Nothing…"
"You're lying."
I am lying.
It always amazed me just how perceptive she could be. She could look at my impassive face for hours and never figure me out. I have a hell of a poker face. But one look into my eyes and she can practically read me like an open book. I blame my mother for that. I blame my father for how stoic I try to be all the time.
If I could tell her what I was feeling, I would. I would tell her that I'm tired of running, that I'm slowly losing my will to fight. Because I have nothing to fight for. I would tell her that every time we fuck, I'm dying just a little bit more inside. Because I'm becoming attached to her when I know she's elusive. Like a fleeting memory. She's like sand between my fingers, impossible to hold forever. I feel like I'm dying, and every single day I come a little closer to keeling over like a dog into my grave.
But I don't have to tell her, do I? She knows. I know she knows. I can see it.
"Kiss me?" My voice is as strong and indifferent as ever. So why does it sound like I'm begging her? Pleading her. I won't lie about this, whatever this is. "I need you," I breathe, shutting my eyes to block her image. It's a no go. I see her in my head. "I need you inside of me."
Her lips -surprisingly soft and sweet for such a tough woman- press themselves against the hollow of my throat, the weight of her body suddenly on top of mine making me painfully aware of everything around me. Our discarded clothes and jackets make our makeshift bed, but the roughness of the desert floor still stings my back. The cold air cools the sweat on my brow before it even has the chance to fully break.
"I know you do."
My body trembles and stiffens at the sensation her fingers cause inside of me. I can't explain how… relieved I feel. It's insane. It isn't right. I feel a physical relief-like dipping my hot body in a cool pool of water-from her touch.
I recall driving through the ruined streets of Raccoon City several months ago. I recall a quiet conversation that wasn't quiet enough for me not to catch it. I didn't know it then, but already I felt something so incredibly strong for this woman.
Right now I just need the comfort of having a warm body pressed against me. I need to feel something other than nothing. My lips part and form a silent cry, my eyes squeezed shut, my body locked in an arch. I need to feel alive and Alice is the only one who does that for me. Does she understand how desperate I am? How hopeless I feel? I feel like something horrible is going to happen and fucking her is the only way I can make myself forget.
Like now. She kisses me hotly, passionately, sating my hunger, clearing my mind.
"I want you…"
"Getting what you want isn't always what's best for you."
"You can make my wildest dreams come true."
She paused, her dark eyes taking in every detail. Something in her expression scared me. But EVERYTHING about myself scared me.
"And I can unleash your darkest nightmares. Jill, I'm dangerous. I'm a danger to everyone. I'm a danger to you." She laid beside me, her lips crashing so hard into mine I tasted blood.
Whose was it? At this point, it was anyone's guess.
I don't know what is happening anymore. Time has no meaning anymore. The hours, days, and weeks blend together and become one big gray blur before me. I'm riding at high velocity. Alice is a stone wall in my path. I WILL crash and burn.
A scream rips itself free from deep inside my chest. A kaleidoscope flashes behind my closed lids, my lungs momentarily deprived of oxygen and my mind blissfully devoid of anything. My orgasm sends me reeling into a place of nothingness. Is this hell? Heaven can't possibly hurt this good.
In this state of mind and emotion it's easy for me to realize certain things that would have escaped my notice otherwise.
I've already crashed.
Now I'm simply waiting for the burn.
-o-
They were moving again. Staying too long in once place was a death sentence for anyone, even skilled, competent combatants like themselves. LJ spoke animatedly to Carlos ad he drove them through the deserted, war torn streets of downtown Detroit. Angela slept peacefully in the very back of the vehicle, her head resting on top of a backpack turned pillow. There was a small smile on her face; she must be having a sweet dream.
Jill sighed. She envied the little girl's ability to lose all worry in the shelter of her sub consciousness. She looked so peaceful, so normal; everything she had never been. Saying that she missed it would be a lie, it's impossible to me something you've never had. But a part of her wished she could go back and time and have it.
"How much longer until we reach the gun shops?" Alice inquired. The silence between herself and Jill didn't bother her in the least bit, but it wasn't her idea of a field trip. The sooner she could get out there and stretch her legs, the better. Truth be told she felt like a caged wild animal. Even before the Raccoon City incident it had always been her and Spencer. Now there was Carlos, LJ, Angela, and last but certainly not least, Jill Valentine. She now carried the responsibility of taking care of these people whether they knew it or not. It went unsaid.
"Maybe," the ex pimp glanced at his fancy gold and diamond watch, "in about… now." He grinned at the rearview mirror. He was excited about getting his hands on some guns as well having lost his customs a long time ago.
As soon as the SUV stopped, Alice, Carlos, and Jill all simultaneously leapt out. They couldn't have gotten out any faster if they'd tried. LJ gave them a funny look, "Does that mean I have to stay with the kid?"
Carlos smirked, patting his back. "Duty calls."
"Yeah right, sure…. Mother fuckin bitch."
"Be nice." Carlos scolded, dropping in line behind Jill and Alice.
Jill's blood was boiling with anticipation, her mounting excitement making her twitchy. This is what she always looked forward to. Action. The hunt. The kill. No one could best her at her element. No one human that is. She was the best of the best, she did what she did well. Her guns whistled as she twirled them round her fingers. Detroit was just another devastated city turned ghost town; just another name on the long list. The streets were filled with the shells of vehicles, garbage, discarded weapons, and every now and then, a body or two remained. Her eyes were trained particularly on a gruesome scene to her left. A lone child zombie wailed as it crawled through across the cracked pavement. Jill swallowed. She was a trained professional and as such she was taught to never let these things get to her. But… that kids couldn't be more than 18 months old. Her stomach flopped. The death blow was easy to discern despite several other bloody wounds. Half of his jaw was visible where the flesh was torn away from his face.
Alice caught sight of the child too. Having lost so many people, she took it in with an air of indifference. Not that she was a complete cold, heartless bitch, but there was nothing she could do for that child. "There's no one in there anymore," she said solemnly, for Carlos's and Jill's benefit, "that's just a shell."
Jill ripped her eyes away from the street, instead busying herself with looking through the display windows of the stores they passed. "We should stop here on the way back; get some food for Angela."
As fate would have it, it turns out Angela took quite the liking to Jill. Sometimes she'd glare at the sky and ask why. The rising STARS agent was anything but the motherly type. Don't get her wrong, she disliked kids a little less than she disliked criminals. Most times. A ghost of smile graced her cracked lips. Angela was one cool kid. She reminded her of someone she.
Within three minutes of their departure from the SUV, the three companions reached the gun store they had their eye on with no complications at all. As always, Alice took point, followed by Jill and then Carlos. The lead brunette trained her gun ahead of her, crouched and ready to spring into action. Jill lowered herself to knee, adopting the shooting position with ease. The plan was simple. Go in, get the guns, ammo, a first aid kit if there was one. Get out.
"Jill, I want you to cover us. Carlos? You help me get the guns and ammo."
"Right." Olivera went straight to work, pulling four heavy duty duffel bags off of the racks and slinging them over his shoulders. His dark eyes concentrated mainly on his task, but he couldn't help jumping at every noise, couldn't help inspecting every dark corner the sunlight didn't reach. Being cautious was the only reason he was still alive.
Taking two bags for herself, Alice stalked to the glass display at the front of the shop. It appeared the door leading to the back had been bolted shut. She could easily kick it in. But that would mean making noise, and noise around here these parts led to certain death more often then not. She would have to do without a shotgun a little longer. "Hmm." Her brows rose in interest. The display case offered a fine selection of pistols, automatics and such, but the guns the caught her eyes were the twin silver plated magnums. Her heart sped up. Those babies could do serious damage. Closing her eyes and ducking her face into her shoulder, she reeled her fist back then let it fly.
The glass shattered instantly beneath the force of the blow, sending shards like little pieces of diamonds sailing through the air. The noise startled Jill and Carlos, prompting them to slide into defensive stance. Until they realized she had caused such the disturbance. She offered them both a sheepish smile which Carlos returned and Jill, well Jill just glared.
Mumbling hotly to herself under her breath, Jill Valentine moved away from the front of the store, from the view of the others. Her heart raced a little fast, a cols sweat trickling down the small of her back. A sudden sense of doom made her mouth feel cotton dry. Detroit was a big city-it was impossible for just one zombie to be out and about. Unless something or someone took them out. The highly skilled officers moved through the isles with the grace and precision that came with years of extreme training. Her heavy boots hardly made a sound as she moved about.
She felt sick earlier on, nothing too bad, just dizzy, a little nauseous. Symptoms like those she easily disregarded. Any number of things could make her feel like she had the hang over from hell. But now she wasn't so sure. She licked her lips, frowning at her thoughts. She didn't like where they were headed.
"Alice!"
Alice spun at the hiss. Her magnums already loaded and pointed. "What?"
Jill flicked her coal black bangs out of her face. She was in desperate need of a hair cut (she was in desperate need of a haircut!) Unsettling blue eyes pierced the air. "It's too quiet."
The softness with which she spoke alarmed Alice. Shit! She should have seen it coming! Of course it was too quiet; Umbrella was always quiet right before they struck. "Carlos-"
"Alice…"
She flinched. That voice was all too familiar. The voice that haunted her nightmares was hardly something she would forget. It belonged to the same man who made her the freak she was now. All sense of logic flew out the window. She only had eyes for him; Doctor Isaacs. He might as well have been the devil himself standing there in an Umbrella lab coat, one hand on his hip while the other held Carlos at gun point. Point blank range. Why hadn't she sensed them? More Umbrella lackeys marched around and surrounded the outside of the small gun shop, machine guns held at the ready. Alice swallowed. Isaacs smirked cockily, like every other villain she'd crossed.
"Alice." He said her name sweetly, in a way that reminded Alice of an owner calling welcoming his run away pet. Her stomach lurched with anger. "My you've given us quite the challenge."
Why did they always want to make conversation? Was there a handbook she didn't know about?
Isaacs lifted a brow, gesturing with the gun at her. "Drop your weapons." His tone said he meant business. Beady eyes followed the high caliber guns until they hit the ground. "This is the end of the line." Now he frowned. "Where's the other one?"
"I don't know what you're talking about." She lied easily. "How did you find me?"
Isaacs scoffed. He was bloody brilliant fucking doctor; did she really think she was distracting him? "Did you really think I would release you just like that? Your Umbrella's most prized possession."
A thick sludge like substance pumped through Alice's veins. Her anger amplified the effects. "How did you find me?" Had Jill reached LJ and Angela yet? Where they driving away as they spoke? She could deal with Carlos being caught. Escaping from within the clutches of Umbrella was nothing new to her. She'd done it three times already, nothing would stop her from getting her freedom. But she found the thought of Angela and Jill being captured absolutely horrifying. Jill was no delicate little girl, that woman could kick ass with the best of them. But…
"Satellite." Isaacs tapped his foot impatiently. He quickly grew tired of this. "Now be a good pet and come with us quietly. " He eyed Carlos with a look of disgust. "If you don't put up a fight, I'll even let your friends go."
"I have a better idea…"
Alice smirked, the look on the horrid doctor's face filled her with sick pleasure. Those wide eyes filled with fear, those blue eyes like daggers keeping him in place.
"Valentine." Isaacs spat. He detested the woman. For years she her blasted nosy partner Chris Redfield had made noise and pointed the finger at Umbrella. Chairman Wesker was willing to pay a rather nice sum for their heads. "Figures you would still be with her. You always need someone to save you. You're so pathetic."
Jill's grip on the gun tightened, eyes blazing. "Keep talking."
"Oh? Did I hurt the little girl's feelings?" The corrupt doctor was relentless. He barked a laugh, trying his best to seem unaffected. As the man who followed these fugitives' every move, he knew exactly what they were capable of. Put himself in this situation was similar to diving into shark infested waters. He licked his wounds. Either of the two women would be more than willing to put a bullet in his head. "That's what she thinks of you, you know. My Alice-"
Jill pistol whipped the back of the man's head. She sneered savagely. So Isaacs did bleed? How much, she wondered. The temptation to find out was almost too much to resist. "Don't. Call. Her. That."
Isaacs lifted a hand to his bleeding head. His gun slipped from his fingers and fell harmlessly to the ground. Alice bent down and collected her weapons, her eyes never leaving Jill's. This situation was one she had tried so damn hard to avoid. Jill was a loose cannon. Dangerous.
"I-I forgot," Isaacs growled, his face twisted in pain and anger. "you're her bitch!"
Jill saw red. "What… did you…"
"Tell me, how have you been feeling lately?"
Alice and Jill exchanged a look. The latter of the two jammed her gun roughly into the doctor's back. "Speak."
"Let me guess" he continued as if there weren't a gun aimed at him. "You can't sleep, you can't eat. You're always hot and shaky. Your thoughts are violent… You're infected."
His words truck Alice like a physical blow. Jill paled eight before her eyes. Carlos stomped his way over to the doctor, yanking him out of Jill's grip, training his own gun on him. "What do you mean she's infected? She hasn't been bitten… Right?"
Jill blinked the angry tears away. "No…"
Carlos felt torn. Jill said no, but her eyes told a different story. "When were you bitten?"
"I told you, I wasn't bitten." She said harshly, whirling on Carlos. "Why would I lie?"
Alice shook her head in an attempt to get her thoughts on track. Her heart dropped. Jill's red eyes were furrowed in confusion. The expression on her face was that of someone betrayed, hurt. Accusing. "She wasn't bitten."
"It was you." The stunned brunette whispered, her arm falling limply to her side. She'd taken a wild guess the second after she started feeling weird. Different. But to actually have this information confirmed. She felt sick to her stomach.
"Jill, please-"
"YOU." Jill snarled, referring to Isaacs, "You have the anti virus. Where is it?"
Isaac's sneer said it all. He wouldn't give it to them. He wanted to sit back and watch them suffer with a bag of popcorn in his lap. "None of you are leaving here. Not alive."
"We'll see about that."
-I-
Krystal cocked her head to the side and eyed the new comer with the curiosity of a kitten. She sent Luther a look to which he responded with a similar gesture of his own.
"Is your friend alright?" She ventured, giving the redhead a desperate look. She truly wanted Alice to be the savior they were all waiting for.
Claire had spent the best part of the hour pushing macaroni around a plate with her fork. Alice and Luther were engaged in some conversation she couldn't be bothered to listen to. She didn't notice when the brunette went silent. Until Krystal pointed it out. She shrugged.
"I have no idea."
"But…"
Claire's brow arched. "But what?" She challenged. She didn't like any of these people. She could smell their desperation in the air. Desperate people were the most dangerous kind. They didn't care about anything but saving themselves and they had no qualms about it. They would kill if they had to. Alice didn't recognize the threat. She did. She especially hated the smooth talking Luther, and the skittish, shady Bennett. The poor little Asian boy didn't even register in her radar and Krystal, while she looked athletic and competent, didn't come off as much of a threat.
Basically, Claire was looking for any and every excuse to leave this group of stragglers. Hell, she would rather make conversation with one of the overgrown rats in the cells. They probably had more character than this bunch. She would more than likely enjoy a rodent's company over these strangers.
"Sh-she's your friend."
Something Krystal said made Claire jolt out of her seat. Grabbing a gun from the pile on the center of the table, she stomped away.
Luther and the offending girl looked at each other, their eyes ticking from the spaced out brunette to the aggravated redhead's retreating back. Within seconds she was lost to the dark shadows of the prison. "What did I say?"
What did she say indeed. Claire couldn't make up her mind. She felt offended by a simple question yet she didn't know what it was that she found so offending about it. Krystal's question was legit. Since they arrived they'd been pretty much inseparable. It was as if Alice were afraid to let her let her out of her sight.
She wasn't a baby, and she was perfectly capable of taking care of herself.
"Damn it."
Why the hell was she complaining? The moment Alice left her side she felt so lonely she was overwhelmed by it. Not that she would ever mention it. She still didn't know who she was but her personality was returning to her. She hated being weak, hated being taken care of and treated like a poor little girl that would break.
Didn't they know she was already broken?
-I-
Alice peered through the cracked, filthy window of Mikey's van and heaved a heart breaking sigh. The sun had barely come up but already the others were up and about moving their belongings from one truck to another. She could see Carlos breaking down the perimeter and somewhere in the distance Kmart spoke animatedly with LJ. If she looked passed all the weapons and the wary, dulled eyed faces of the survivors she could lie to herself and pretend they were just out for a little gathering at the park. A very hot, dry, scorpion infested, sand ridden park. Letting the shades fall back into place, she laid back down.
Her eyes fell upon the sleeping face of Claire Redfield. She wasn't much for emotions and expressions, but she truly believed their compromising positions deserved at least a perked brow.
"Claire?" She called. The others were up and about alright. The light tapping at the door announced to her the presence of Kmart- the girl had a distinctive form of knocking that Alice had picked up on. Soon Carlos would grow inpatient and come knocking as well. She didn't care nor mind if Kmart knew, but she had the feeling Carlos would be hurt. And what of Claire's wishes? Maybe she wasn't so keen on letting the entire world -it might as well be the entire world- know that she shacked up with the freak. Yes. She saw the way people looked at her, didn't miss the way the avoided her. They thought she was a freak. And with good reason.
A finger traced the crease that had formed between her brows, the touch so gentle, so light she could convince herself it wasn't real. That it was a dream.
How sadistic of her.
"Whatever you're thinking," baby soft lips replaced her finger, "stop it."
Alice breathed a sigh of relief, her thoughts were so bad they gave her headaches. Craning her neck, she met Claire's lips with her own. Sparks were flying. Not really, but if actual sparks flew when passion rose and lust intensified the van would have caught on fire.
"I can't help it."
Claire watched a volley of emotions flash across pale green eyes. Alice's eyes reminded her of a stormy ocean, their sheer beauty could not hide or sugarcoat the storm. Still, she could get lost in them forever. Drown in them.
"They think I'm a freak."
"What do you care what they think?" Claire was truly curious. She'd never cared what total complete strangers thought. She didn't give a damn.
"I just-I don't know why."
Sitting up, Claire pulled Alice against her chest, running her fingers through the sandy brown curls, resting her chin top of her head. "I think you're absolutely fucking amazing." She said honestly, trying her hardest to ignore all the crazy sensations Alice's naked body caused her.
Those calloused strong hands on her body, her hot mouth on her hard, pert nipples. And her lips! Full, hungry lips claiming her…
"Alice… I-" They both jumped when incessant banging knocked them straight out of their reverie. Claire flashed Alice a goofy, affectionate smile, combing her fingers through her hair. "Think if we ignore them they'll leave?"
Alice reached for her clothes. Giving her the LOOK.
"Claire!" Kmart screeched, banging harder on the screen door. "I know you're awake! I can hear you whispering!" The blonde teenager accused.
Claire slapped her palm to her head, turning a deep shade of red. Had the others heard that? She wasn't ashamed nor embarrassed, but she could just hear all the teasing. Alaska was a really long drive. Carlos and LJ were going to have a field trip.
"I'm sorry," she apologized, smirking despite the heat in her face.
Alice laughed. God it felt so good to laugh! "Claire y-you're so red."
"Nice," she blushed harder. "I just met you and you're already teasing me."
"I like it."
"You like seeing me embarrassed?"
"No," she pushed away the stray red hair. "Red looks good on you."
Claire bit her lip, suddenly bashful. She leaned into Alice's hand, basking in this rare little moment of peace. They couldn't afford to have moments like this, not in this world, not if they wanted to survive.
But she was grateful for it. Cherished it.
"I don't know what's happening, Alice. But I don't want this to end."
-I-
Picking an empty cell block, she trudged on inside, dropping herself in a very unlady like manner into a more or less clean looking cot. She scowled. The springs were digging into her back, the chipped paint fell into her eyes. Just great.
The heavy thumping of feet made alerted her to the presence of someone just outside her cell. "What ever you have to say, it better be good."
"Sorry."
The redhead shut her eyes. "Angel."
"The others are worried about you and your friend." He stated, leaning against the bars. The cells were not locked, but there was no way he was intrude upon the woman's personal space. Her being inside of the cage suited her. She seemed untouchable.
Claire made a sound that resembled the word, 'oh.' "I appreciate the sentiment…"
Angel chuckled to himself, holding onto the steel bars to keep himself upright. Through the faint light cast by the torches on the walls he could easily make out a rather unpleasant sneer aimed at the ceiling. "I know people like you."
Her defenses slid into place. Without her consent, her body tensed and coiled, her hands clenching at her sides, nostrils flaring. "You don't know a damn thing about me."
"Okay," he said soothingly, raising his hands in surrender although he knew she was paying him no mind. "Okay. You're right. I shouldn't have-"
"You're right," she cut him off, "you shouldn't have." Turning on her side, she gave her back to the solider, effectively ending their conversation.
Angel sighed, deflated. "I'm sorry." He mumbled, slinking away.
Just when she thought she'd gotten rid of him, Claire recognized the sound of boots clunking on the metal steps then approaching her cell.
"Listen, dude, I really don't want to hear it from you."
"Claire?"
Claire peered into the dark over her shoulder. Alice's slender figure pressed itself into the far wall. She could feel her eyes on her, could feel her thinking.
"Alice." She greeted in a neutral tone.
"The others said you'd left in a hurry."
"Not really. I don't like being around other people."
She stiffened. Was that her way of telling her to go away? "Am I bothering you?"
"No!" Claire's voice was laced with urgency as she turned over, casting pleading eyes at Alice. "You don't bother me. I-I… you don't bother me." She hated how pitifully she sounded. But she wasn't so pigheaded that she wouldn't admit she wanted her to stay. She NEEDED her to stay.
Alice understood at once what it was Claire was trying to communicate to her. Sliding the steel bar door into place, she removed her gun holsters and dropped the bag with her weapons on the floor. She moved slowly towards the bed, painfully of aware of Claire's eyes watching her every move. She slid into the cot and stretched herself out as Claire scooted towards the wall.
No more words were shared between them. Words were trivial -in Alice's opinion- and only served to make things a lot more complicated than they should be. Words could be molded. Words could turn to lies. But their raw emotions couldn't lie. She knew her jerky movements and unsteady eyes gave her away the same way Claire's stiff body beside her and rapidly rising and falling chest gave her away. She was nervous, not because of Claire's own nerves but because her memories of Jill had only made everything that much more confusing. And clear at the same time.
A sudden sense of longing overcame her. Her adrenaline from fight and flight was beginning to wear off, leaving her too exhausted to do anything but think and remember. How fitting that Claire couldn't remember anything while she remembered everything. For instance, she recalled how they'd made plans to build a little cabin once they settled down in Arcadia, a place that could be just theirs where no one would bother them.
It hit Alice like a slap to face and she whimpered; Claire didn't remember anything. She didn't remember her life before the virus ravaged the world or her family. She didn't remember her friends, or the things she'd done, nor the faces of those she came to hold dear. Worst of all, she didn't remember Kmart.
She doesn't remember me.
The thought scared Alice. Claire had forgotten the one night she dropped her defenses and just let herself be led, let herself touch and be touched, kiss and be kissed. It was outrageous. She hadn't forgotten how Claire had cried her name, how she'd felt, or how she promised she would never hurt her.
It's not her fault.
"Claire?"
"Hmm?" The redhead yawned beside her, beginning to relax enough to at least close her eyes. Alice's presence soothed her very soul. A very troubled soul at that.
"Can I hold you?"
The request caught her off guard. For a moment she held her breath and listened to the sound of her heart going crazy inside of her chest. "No. You can't hold me."
The disappointment she felt nearly made her want to cry. She was surprised when she felt Claire's arms wrapping around her, pulling her close to the redhead's warm body. Her own body adjusted, molded itself to fit perfectly against Claire's front.
"But I can hold YOU." her breath tickled the hair on the back of her neck and sent pleasant spikes of warmth all throughout her body. Her eyes fluttered shut, her tired mind and body willingly giving into the illusion of safety created by Claire's muscular, feminine arms holding her tight.
Claire nuzzled Alice's velvety black hair, her lids growing extremely heavy. All of her thoughts and concerns -which did nothing but plague her at every waking moment- slipped away, leaving her blissfully ignorant. For tonight, all she wanted to do was sleep and not dream. And if she did dream, she wanted those dreams to be filled with something other than blood, pain, tears, and heart broken gazes. She wanted them to be filled with something familiar, and warm, and comfortable. Something strong, yet gentle and loving. Something- No. Someone. Someone who cared and who would protect her.
She wanted them to be filled with Alice.
"Sh-she's your friend." She understood now why Krystal's words stung so badly. The girl couldn't have been more wrong.
'She's not my friend. She's MORE than a friend. I have the feeling she always has been.'
-I-
Alice turned around and watched, defeat written on her features, as Jill valiantly fought off of an onslaught of Umbrella Officers, buying her and Carlos time to escape to the SUV. She still held Isaacs at gunpoint but her gun hand shook violently, blood dripping from her fingers, sweat staining her brow.
"I can take them." Alice protested. A few more feet and they would all be home free. Except Jill. "Jill , you have to come."
A pale, shaky Jill flashed a twisted perverse version of her once charming, breath taking smile. "All this time we killed the zombies and blamed them for everything wrong that happened. The zombies; they're the monsters, right?"
Alice shook her head, Jill's words rang with a sense of truth but she couldn't care less. "Jill… please…"
"Do you want to know something funny, Alice?" Her finger twitched around the trigger, her grip on Isaacs wavering. She deliberately ignored her lover's pleas. This hurt so badly but she had to do this. She couldn't allow Alice to sacrifice herself for them again. Besides, she could do a much better job of protecting the others than she could. "They're not the monsters. Humans; they're the monsters. They created these things and they had no say so in this. Alice," her tone demanded her utmost, undivided attention. Grey eyes dulled and became unfocused. "WE'RE the monsters."
Carlos latched onto Alice's wrist, pulling her with him away from their surrounded comrade. "If you get caught then it was all for nothing." He whispered harshly, dragging her the last few feet to the SUV. With Isaacs held at gunpoint, his men would not dare follow them. Not now. Ripping the door open, he mouthed a silent 'watch your back' to the brunette. She never failed to surprise him. Not even in the end. He shoved Alice's head down and pushed her into the back seat. "Drive." He ordered LJ.
Alice stared emotionlessly at the gun in her hand. It was the latest silver plated Desert Eagle model in top working condition. One way or another Jill found a way to shove it into her hands before it all got out of hand. Clutching the gun to her chest she stared lifelessly at Carlos and LJ. Olivera's once comforting smile left her feeling cold and empty. There truly was nothing left in this world that could ever make her smile again.
Jill breathed a little easier now that the others were safe, even if it was only momentarily. Dropping her gun to the ground, she raised her hands slowly and placed them behind her head. Sunshine broke through the dense dark clouds in the sky and shone down on her. She smiled a smile that the naked eye could simply not catch.
It's warm today.
A strangled gasp rushed past her cracked, bloody lips. Pain shot across the back of her head and sent her crashing to the ground. She couldn't breathe. Then she couldn't see. Finally, there was nothing. Nothing at all.
Alice…