A/N: Hi guys! I know I put this on hiatus, but then, TheSugarQueenOfCourse and I started working on this in my free time, one thing led to another and well... I got this. Note: I'm 34% certain that Sugar's ADHD. That explains the randomness.

uest Chapter: Written by: TheSugarQueenOfCourse.

Disclaimer: Percy Jackson and all of his pals belong to Rick Riordan. All wizards belong to The Great Goddess JKRowling.

The inspiration and vague plotline of this story is the spawn of Willakarra.

Voldemort hissed as he plotted with his Death Eaters. "We leave England, and all of those wizards! We are going to rule the Muggles...of AMERICA."

-
It was a fairly normal day in camp. The Ares cabin was trying to murder the Demeter cabin for singing hyms and planting flowers too close to the Ares cabin. The Apollo cabin was singing badly, and was apparently trying to HELP the Demeter cabin (something about avenging the chorus of voices or something like that), although they were really just annoying everyone. The Athena cabin was trying to soundproof the walls of their cabin. They had all the plans laid out, but the Hephaestus cabin refused to help them with the grunt work, because of something the Athena cabin had said about brains versus brawn. The Hunters of Artemis were due to arrive tomorrow, but one of them had arrived scouting ahead, apparently, because the Poseidon cabin was...on fire...

Most everyone else was either sleeping or trying to murder the Apollo/Ares/Demeter cabin, depending on who was being the most annoying at the time.

Oh yeah. And the Hermes cabin had declared all-out war on vegetables. So they were /secretly/ destroying gardens.

How lovely.

Our protagonist, Percy Jackson, was busy un-firing his cabin. It was taking more water than logic would deem necessary.

Of course, this was a camp full of demigods. Who needs logic?

As Percy finished, a dark cloud drew over the sky...the bright summer day took on a deep chill. All the demigods stopped and stared. THE WEATHER CAN'T CHANGE! ZEUS FORBIDS IT! NOBODY CAN OUTSMART-CAN-

They started to feel despair and loss of hope. Because a certain Dark Wizard and a certain troop of Death Eaters and a certain group of Dementors were hovering in.

"This strawberry farm is concealed with an enchantment, my lord," Lucius Malfoy hissed. "I sense a high concentration of...hair."

Voldemort blinked. Twice. "THEN LET US KILL THEM ALL!11!~1!11!1!1!"

Demigods: Not pleased. "THIS IS AN INVASION! THEY MEAN TO STEAL OUR LIP GLOSS!" 90% of the Aphrodite cabin fainted. The others grabbed all the lip gloss and ran. Piper was on vacation (a double date) with Jason, Frank, and Hazel, otherwise they would have smeared eyeliner across their cheeks and declared war.

"CAN'T YOU SEE? THIS IS A TRICK FROM GAEA! WE SHALL KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIoIhIhIiItIhIeIrIeIhIoIwIaIrIeIyIoIuIdIoIiInIgIkIaIyItIhIaInIkIsIbIyIeIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!" The Ares cabin screamed.

Percy's personal theory was that Thalia was playing a really. Really. REALLY. big. prank. After all, his cabin was smoking and smelled like ash. Not cool, bro.

And that was when Mr. U. No. Poo. paid a visit. I mean...You Know Who. Of course. IGNORE THAT, ALL OF YOU DEMIGODS DOWN THERE.

"...why...do I have...this feeling...that this is all caused...by someone...named...U...no...POO..." everyone in Camp Halfblood simultaneously said.

"O_O WHAT JUST HAPPENED" they said next.

"O...O THIS IS WEIRD"

"jinx!" Percy yelled.

Anyways. Mr. HE WHO MUST NOT BE NAMED DUN DUN DUN twitched his wand. "IF YOU ARE A WIZARD, JOIN MY DEATH EATERS. IF YOU ARE A MUGGLE, DIE. IFYOU ARE A MUDBLOOD, CRUCIO!"(A/N: I edited the bold parts not in parentheses) Because Voldemort had his wand pointed the wrong way, he accidentally hit Bellatrix Lestrange in the face with the curse.

TheWeirdLawsOfTheUniverseDecreeThatGodsAreSomethingLikeWizardsSoBasicallyEveryoneInCampHalfBloodIsEitherAMagicalCreatureOrAHalf-BloodOrPossiblyAPure-Blood. Or a super-duper-upper powered wizard. WE'RE LOOKING AT YOU, HECATE.

Right. Plotline.

The Demigods squinted. "DIIIIIIE!" somerandomAreschicknamedClarisseyelled.

"NO!NO DYING! THEY WANT YOU TO DIE? WE WANT YOU TO LIVE!" somerandomDemeterguyyelled.

"...ARE YOU INSANE? I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THOSE PEOPLE SAID BUT IT INCLUDED DIE. LEAVE OUR HOME BEFORE WE KILL YOU!" Percy shouted. The dramaticness was ruined by a certain demigod named Nico being pantsed. He was wearing purple pink yellow polka dotted underwear. Nico yelled and then a frog landed on Percy's head. how strange.

"sd;lfkdjas;fkjds ;lfkadgjwe hgaw giewiaptihewopahi geiht ithweihteio[paweopthi" yelled: Everyone

"I AM LORD VOLDEMORT. SURRENDER OR DIE."

pause.

Didjaeverhearthatstorytheemperorhasnoclothesorwhatchamacallit.

Envision...something like that.

EW YOU ARE GROSS NOOOOO NOT LIKE THAT.

I mean...everyone paused. and stared. Some scratched their heads.

a brave soul named WillaDaKarra yelled "His name is MOULDYSHORTS!"

A girl named Sugar immediately used her weird powers of weirdness to change the Dark Mark into a candy bar. Subsequently, most of the "Death Eaters" (NO WONDER THEY'RE SO FAT" got very ill and almost died, because, like, that's a part of their arm. What the purple.

Voldemort himself, of course, just cut off his arm, sacrificed it, and gave himself a new silver one that would betray him in the end.

SPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOILER^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

tHEN? iT WAS WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR.

oKAY? nOT OKAY!

basically Voldemort was rendered helpless by the ceaseless chanting "MOULDYSHORTS!"

Then it became a competition to see who could use the most ridiculously complex way to *kill* *decapitate* *torture* *humiliate* *forcetowatchtwilight* attack Mouldy.

The Athena cabin, of course, had the most complex way, but they spent too much time arguing about the specifics to actual implement it. FAIL.

The Hermes cabin was too large and half of them did the wrong thing at the right time and the other half did the right thing at the wrong time. FAIL.

The Hephaestus cabin tried to build a really complex machine, but apparently the Athena cabin swapped all of their blueprints with candy wrappers. *oridunnomaybesomeonefromtheHermescabinbutitsmorefuntoblameAnnabeth!* FAIL.

The Demeter cabin refused to do anything un-peaceful. FAIL.

The Apollo cabin just sang. I mean...it worked...except it wasn't exactly complex. SORTAFAIL.

The Ares cabin used their traditional nose-remover method, until they realized he didn't have a nose. They were going to scalp him, but he had no hair, so what was the point? FAIL.

The Hunters of Artemis crashed the party, but they didn't understand the point of the contest. FAIL.

The Dionysus cabin tried to make him extremely drunk, but got kicked out of the contest because it wasn't actually painful. FAIL.

The Hypnos cabin fella sleep on top of Mouldy's face. FAIL.

The Hecate cabin took away his magic. BORING. MEGAFAIL.

The Poseidon cabin tried giving him the equivalent of a bellyflop sting by throwing water on his stomach. LAM-O. MEGAMEGAMEGAMEGAMEGAFAIL.

The Hades cabin won, because Nico brutally maimed a voodoo dummy. He refused to hurt actual Voldy. But hey, everyone else was like triple fail, so YAY NICO!1! q!~!2! #3! #231!1!111

tHE END.

A/N: Right now, half of you are nodding in perfect understanding. The other half are saying "What the hades is that supposed to be?" Answer: TOTALLY AWESOMELY EPICALLY RANDOM. Note how I did not actually cross out that stuff. xD. Points to anyone who spotted the two cameos. Hope I made you laugh. BTW if you want to see more of my updates, I'm active on Bad LUck. WillaDaKarra(that's my cameo name) signing out.