At the drop of a hat you were on LOLCAT. Or at least, about 50 feet above LOLCAT. Panic sunk in, and you squeaked as you began plummeting to the ground. Right before impact, though, you mentally facepalmed yourself and sent a gust of wind upwards all around you, steadying yourself a few feet off of the ground. You really should start thinking these things through, damnit! You almost didn't notice the small gray and green creature hiding behind a pile of little white cubes, peering at you with her sparkling yellow eyes. Before you could say a word, though, she pounced, sending you tumbling towards the ground.
"AC pounces on the unsuspecting human and pulls him into a surpurrise tacklehug!" she mewled. Oh fuck, Karkat was right. She did take this roleplaying thing seriously. Well, you were a fun guy, and knew a lot about roleplaying from your flushcrush Vriska, so you decided to play along for the time being.
"The unsuspecting human quickly regains his stature and hugs the small troll back!" You chuckled and look up at Nepeta, who is sitting quite cat-like on your stomach. You have to admit, she's really freaking cute. The way she smiles, her adorable cat-ear horns, her tail... You sigh dreamily, and then shake your head. No no no no no no no no. You will NOT start thinking like this. You are so close to capturing the cerulean heart of one Vriska Serket, and you aren't going to blow it over some catgirl! She cocks her head to the side, as if she were waiting for something. Oh right, you were going to give her a hug! You had almost forgotten. You pull her into a tender bro (or sis, you weren't entirely sure) embrace and stood up, carrying her bridal style in your arms. She giggled and looked up at you with those piercing eyes of hers.
"AC purrs and purrches on top of the John Human as she leads him back to her cave fur tea!"
Wait.
What.
Perch she does, stealthily climbing up onto your shoulders and balancing her weight evenly. You look up at her, a smirk painted on your lips. You felt her shiver as you sent a gust of wind up behind her to keep her in place, and she pointed her shaky arm out towards a large, cave-like structure in one of the massive sugar cube piles. You started off, trudging through the thick mass of cubes. Oh how you wish these cubes were easier to get through.
== John: be the cat girl.
You are now back to being Nepeta Leijon, and boy, are you happy! The John Human is here and he's going to teach you how to use your powers and you're just so excited you want to burst! But you don't. This is not a time for bursting! It is a time for learning. And tea. You can never go wrong with tea!
Your legs are currently wrapped around his neck and you suddenly realize how friendly he is. You have never seen someone take such a liking to someone else so quickly! You guess that two people with equally bubbly personalities are a good combination. But not as good as one bubble and one crabby. Nothing could be as perfect as that combination. Ever. As the John Human enters your cave, you hop off of his shoulders and flip on the light switch Equius helped you install. His reaction to your cave is priceless.
== Nepeta: go back to being the John Human.
It isn't long before you reach her cave and she descends from her perch on your shoulders. She flips on a switch- you didn't realize that caves could have electrical systems- and oh my god what the hell is all of this. A substance that looks suspiciously like blood is in shapes and patterns and grids all over the walls of her cave. It seems to be some sort of shipping wall. You see little pictures of all of the trolls, your friends, even... yourself? Okay, you're not sure whether to think of this as cute or creepy. Or both. You're going to go with both. You look closer at your ships in particular. She seems to have a "finished" grid for you, with five of your friends in it. The first, the matespritship quadrant, is a picture of Vriska. You smile at this one. The next, your moirail, is Jade. That one is fine by you as well. The third, kismesissitude, is with... Tavros? You could see that happening. Kind of. You hated Tavros (he was always trying to steal Vriska from you!) but you're not quite sure of naive little Tavvy could hate someone so much as to become their kismesis. And the final, auspisticim, was Kanaya mediating between you and Karkat. Now that one, you agree with. From what you hear, Kanaya is a good auspistice. You look back at Nepeta, who is beaming at you with those cute little fangs of hers. You smiled, and sat down next to her at her little tea table. For the first time since you've entered her hive, you spoke.
"So what do you want to know, little one?"