Elsa and Kristoff sat in the dining room. The afternoon was turning to evening in a haze of colour. The room was cold however. This inconsistency was not lost on the seated monarch, but she hoped this was lost on the stiff-necked Ice Harvester.
Lets hope this goes well. Considering…
She noticed her left hand twitch rhythmically.
Kristoff knew as soon as he was 'summoned' alone that it was for something private. Something Anna couldn't know about. Or at least not yet.
It bothered Kristoff, but a different part of him didn't know why.
The queen sat reposed, her eyes staring at various places around the room.
Kristoff felt out of place, but relaxed slightly once they had been left alone. He was unfamiliar with his position here. His brain was discharging much energy towards figuring out what the protocol was.
"Kristoff, I think we are a little alike" Elsa spoke with obvious register.
Kristoff straightened up visibly.
What does she mean?
"In what regard, your majesty?" His reply was timid, born of a little boy dangerously carving ice. To talk to what was in part an embodiment of ice didn't make it any easier.
Elsa wanted to correct him on her pronoun, as that was a greeting she was tired of after the morning she had. But she felt keenly observed, as if a theatre audience were watching her. So she spoke what came to mind, determined to read through her lines as fast as possible.
"We both have an interesting approach to people"
She cringed internally, feeling in all respects like a desperate fool.
You aren't being very clear.
She dared to look at his face for a moment, and then scan away to some other place. She wasn't so good with faces, eyes especially. She found nothing interesting, but plenty to consider in them. Plenty to fear also. Eyes distinctly bothered her.
Kristoff said nothing, offhandedly assuming the Monarch would know what she had to say.
Clearing her throat more noticeably than she would have liked, Elsa continued.
Well, kept going at any rate.
"From what I have been informed, you have lived a relatively solitary life, have you not?" She asked, looking slightly too inquisitive.
That was rude of you. How wise this is becoming.
Elsa looked directly at him, ignoring the rising unsteadiness in her gut for a few seconds. It was taking everything to avoid leaving the room at a brisk pace. Her hands were barely kept still by her nervous system. Without her input, they decided to fold.
Kristoff replied evenly, seeing no need to dance in his words.
"Yeah, I did. Me and Sven. I learned how to live off the land from the ice-harvesters and I have people I would pay to let me rest for the night in their lodgings."
He paused, disliking the absolute formality that was choking his speech.
"But I never got too involved with others."
He stopped himself from saying more, each word giving him a sense of stealing from the Queens time to talk.
Elsa felt the opposite, wishing he had said more. She fiddled with her cup, forcing herself to speak. She waited and waited but found she had to talk.
The only thing worse than an awkward silence was an endless one.
"Why did you not get...involved with other people?"
Both Elsa and Kristoff were by now sensing the others discomfort. But Elsa did not know how to seem caring. She did care, as he had done her no wrong, but she didn't know how to show it. Her over developed sense of panic was keeping her from saying too much. It was as if someone pressed on her head whenever she thought too deeply on the subject.
She wanted Kristoff to be comfortable to talk, but seemed to be failing by her own observation.
Kristoff was trapped between two assumptions and it did not take him long to realise that the fact he had to assume anything was scaring him a little. He did not feel right to judge the motivations of his Monarch; even a loner had such impulses. Elsa's sheer position was slowing down his normal brashness. All this he could feel as if by hand, and yet hardly anything had been said.
Either Elsa wanted to know about his romantic past, as well as his past in general, or she was seeking a knowing set of ears regarding her own awkwardness around people. He had seen that quickly. He was oddly good at that. Her background also made that pretty clear to him. Kristoff did not feel confident asking which was which, afraid he might offend. Applying the razor of Occam, he answered the more straightforward question, unsure why he saw the Queen as awkward in that instance.
"I have never felt the need to be around people intimately."
He decided to add to it, as the Queen seemed unmoved by his words.
"Until I met the Princess, of course."
Kristoff watched the queen intently. He severely hoped he was saying the right things. He noticed how neither of them particularly stayed still. He was usually relaxed and aloof, but the latter would be out of touch here. This he somehow knew.
Elsa was beset by an array of different mental conundrums. The first, what to say in response, went passed her. She remembered that the burly man had his eyes set on her Sister.
Oh, he thinks I'm asking about that...
Elsa found herself no closer to responding to Kristoff as the harsh seconds ticked by. Her mind was currently going over her current problem of reply. She spoke by reflex, as if turning an hourglass upside down once more to reset herself.
Buy yourself time.
"Well I am glad you have changed because of her. I hope that this will continue. For the Better"
Kristoff noticed the Queen barely seemed to look at him. Every human instinct told him to ask what was troubling her. She was clearly uncomfortable and he was seeing in her many things he had seen in himself around people. And what she was saying was nothing negative. But he instead remained tight-lipped and rigid, knowing his arbitrary place, and wishing he didn't.
Elsa finally snapped back from her head. Her original plan was dashed. Seeing no way to bring her hoped for discussion back to the table, she wished to end the conversation before she panicked and ran. Every part of her felt restricted with each second as the eyes of a distant viewer seemed to study her very soul.
"I just wanted to set my mind at ease" She almost instructed, trying to compensate for her lack of focus and nervous disposition.
"I think you and Anna will get along, but you must take your time"
Stop, you're beginning to sound like a mother.
"Of course, after what happened before I'd hate to…do anything…untoward." Kristoff stuttered, not even sure what he meant. The Queens eyes looked shakily into his own. He noticed something. What it was eluded him for a second.
"Now, if you will excuse me"
Elsa then quickly departed, barely gesturing to the correct exit for Kristoff as she did.
The young harvester stood up, stretching his legs. He had seen the Queen afraid. That's what her eyes told his. He was already wishing he could be blunter with his girlfriend's sister, but his social standing told him this wasn't the best idea. He nonetheless did not need to be told that Anna was probably best kept out of whatever this was. It was also most likely the Queen was looking for advice on something.
A problem of her own.
He wished he could talk more and find out what it was he was unaware of, but he saw something else in Elsa's eyes. It was something he had found long ago in himself. A part of the soul that was used to being alone.
There was one final thing he saw.
But the larger picture refused to come together, so Kristoff decided to leave his mind without an answer, for now.
Meanwhile Elsa stood outside the room, cursing to herself.
It was stupid. Embarrassing. He doesn't know anything about you.
She stopped and took her breath, ignoring the fact her back was making considerable efforts to kill her from her ill postured nights sleep.
You aren't good with people, not even with other people who aren't good with people.
I need to figure out how...to talk to them.
She halted just short of tears.
You need to open up and ignore the cold. They are here to help.
I need to stop feeling so afraid of people.
The queen walked away towards her next engagement, arguing with herself in her head.
I want to talk but why would they listen...nobody does. They are afraid.
Arent they?
She stopped her brisk pace, clutching her left hand towards her center.
And you burned the only thing that heard you.
On her eyes, tears began to form.
Outside, Princess Anna noticed on the bridge towards the gates that the air had chilled rather abruptly. No frost, no ice.
But the air spoke to her.
Oh, Elsa…
I am a cruel god. My Elsa will probably one day murder me.
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