I planned to update a lot earlier than this, but didn't have the time! Thank you all for the interest- I wasn't sure if anyone besides me would find this entertaining, so every review is great to see! This is dedicated to everyone who encouraged me to continue this little piece of crack.

Bob: Yes, most of the apes wear clothes in this (similar to what Cornelius and Zira wore in the original pota). And we'll find out who the teapot and cup are in this chapter

Disclaimer: I don't own pota

The walking grandfather clock, or rather, Maurice had lead him into a pleasant and surprisingly clean room, though they had to climb several flights of stairs, coming up from the basement. Honestly, Caesar had expected more dust. He'd also expected Koba to turn into a bat and attack him from the ceiling. But neither had happened, and Maurice was kind enough to inform him Will had indeed made it out alive.

"I'm sorry it's not much," Maurice signed, "we don't have guests."

"It's fine," Caesar replied, "I live in an attic."

Maurice didn't quite know how to respond to that. Fortunately, he didn't have to, because at that moment a grey teapot bounced up to them, a cloud of steam curling from its snout.

"This is Cornelia," the grandfather clock informed Caesar, "the housekeeper."

Two teacups bounced up beside the pot, one with a set of blue eyes and the other much smaller in size. "And her sons, Blue Eyes, Cornelius."

"Hello," Cornelia spelled out with her steam, "oh, you really are handsome."

Blue Eyes rolled his eyes. In his opinion, Caesar was only OK, a solid 6/10, and that was being generous. Caesar could tell the teacup was judging him, like some kind of rebellious son. He looked to Cornelia again and said, "You're beautiful."

And he wasn't just saying it to be polite- she did have a set of intricate patterns on her porcelain. To his amusement, the teapot turned a shade of pink before puffing thank you. He wondered what kind of ape Cornelia was. Before he realized he was literally flirting with a teapot, a wide candelabra with a set of particularly muscular candles entered the room, deepset eyes sizing him up and down.

"You," it signed with one of its arms, "you're the new guy?"

"This is Rocket," Maurice signed, "forgive him. He's... brash."

Rocket proceeded to ignore Maurice and stalk around Caesar. The chimp knew this was a piece of table decoration, but found Rocket intimidating nonetheless (well, not as much as Koba but the point stands). Candle arms began poking him left and right.

"Can't believe Koba's keeping you. Is your butt tight?"

"What?" Caesar said.

"What else are you good for? Besides butt sex. Pretty males are the most useless."

"What-"

Then Rocket was staring him up in the face, candle arms ready to punch him then and there. "We'll see how pretty you are after this!"

"Rocket, leave him alone!" Cornelia puffed.

Cornelius and Blue Eyes began hopping up and down, as if enthusiastically crying "fight! fight! fight!" But the excitement was cut short when the wardrobe in the corner opened one of its doors and sent Rocket flying onto the bed. The wardrobe looked to Caesar and simply said, or rather, signed with the sleeves inside itself: "Luca."

"Caesar," the chimp said, pointing at himself, still trying to make sure this wasn't all some fever dream.

"Then we'll let you get settled, Caesar," Maurice signed, "please ring for staff if you need anything. And don't go into the West Wing."

The furniture filed out of the room, Rocket stopping to cast Caesar a rather bullying glare. Cornelia blushed once more and Blue Eyes again gave him that passive aggressive judgmental look ("What am I, your father?" Caesar wanted to ask in retaliation but bit his tongue). And when they were all gone, the chimp noticed he had nothing to do. It would be a very boring rest of the day after all that.

Caesar took back all his complaints about being bored. Because after sundown, Rocket had showed up and quite literally kicked him out of the room. The beating would have gone on if Maurice hadn't shown up and taken over. And now Caesar sat across from Koba at the other end of a stupidly long table, a bowl of something in front of him. Across, Koba was tearing into a turkey leg, chomping all over sauce and grease.

It was awkward, to say the least. And Caesar was still entire unsure what kind of plans Koba had for him. Rocket's inappropriate comments did little to help. Noticing his blank stare, Koba flicked the bone of his meat on the floor and glowered with his one good eye. "Why Caesar not eating?" he growled.

"What is this?" the chimp asked, pointing at whatever it was in his bowl.

"Koba's food, not good enough?" Koba asked dryly, a dark edge to his tone.

That shut Caesar up. He picked up the bowl (because there was no spoon) and took a sip- it was some kind of squash soup. Then, after a beat of silence, he said, "It's good. Thank you."

Koba said nothing. All he did was take another turkey leg and viciously bite into it again. Except this time, he never broke eye contact with Caesar, as if trying to imply the chimpanzee was next on the menu.

"Koba," Caesar said, venturing to make conversation, "how long have you lived here?"

Koba shrugged.

"Never been to Koba's castle," the chimp continued, "it's-" he struggled for the right word, "interesting."

Koba kept eating, and Caesar almost drowned in the awkwardness. What else was there to ask?

"Eye," he said, "what happened?"

Koba froze. "Nothing."

"Looks bad. Who hurt you?"

Caesar found it hard to believe Koba was born looking so... Koba. Those scars had to have come from somewhere, and he was pretty sure the scars weren't just physical.

"Humans!" Koba spat, "long time ago. Hate humans. But you-"

He tossed another bone. "You love humans." His nostrils flared.

"Only," Caesar said, now feeling the need to defend himself, "good humans."

"No good human!" Koba snarled, slapping his own plate halfway across the table, splats of mash hitting Caesar in the face. Then Koba was on the table, panting and hooting as he crawled the surface length. "Never say that!"

Caesar had a reply, but it was cut short when Koba's arm whacked the bowl of soup over the edge, sloppy liquid dampening his clothes.

"You, ape! Me, ape!" Koba stated, "no love for humans!"

Caesar honestly wanted to say something along the lines of, oh wow, we're apes, oh wow, I never knew that! Thank you for telling me- no shit, Koba, you deranged shit. But that would have been out of character for him, so he said, calm as he could, "No love for humans."

"Caesar understands," he signed, "I'm sorry, Koba. Excuse me?"

Caesar held up a shaky palm. Koba swiped and went back to his seat, looking more demon than ape. Without wasting another second, Caesar left the table, almost bumping into Maurice on the way.

Still reeling from Koba's outburst, Caesar had completely forgotten the dangers of the rest of the castle. Its master was the most threatening thing around and anywhere he could hide was a welcome sanctuary. Like Will, Caesar was normally a very smart individual. But at the moment, he was so disoriented with everything that'd happened- talking furniture, the judgmental teacups, getting beat up by a candlestick, Koba's assaults- that he ignored Maurice's warning and entered the west wing.

Of course, Caesar didn't know it was the west wing. It looked like the east to him. Everything looked like a wing when you lived in an attic.

He found himself in what appeared to be an abandoned hall, tangled with vines and dust. Everything was dirty, damp, and grey. He considered lighting a fire, but that involved finding a fireplace. So he walked on.

"New friend!" a voice said.

Caesar almost tripped over a branch. A cartography book all but flew up to him.

"Who are you?" he asked.

"I steward!" the book said, eyes delighted, "Bad Ape!"

"Pardon!?"

"Bad ape, my name!"

"Caesar," the chimp said, surprised at how unsurprised he was to be talking to a book, "Bad Ape, where is this?"

"West Wing!"

Caesar could have sworn that information was important, but it slipped his mind at the moment. He pursed his lips and turned, only to actually trip this time. When he got up, a feather duster was cleaning his shoulders.

"That's Lake, a friend!" Bad Ape said.

Are you Koba's lover? Lake signed.

Caesar felt his brow furrow. And suddenly furious, he clenched his fists and said through grating teeth, "No. Never."

Bad Ape and Lake exchanged glances, as if disappointed that Caesar wasn't madly in love with the violent captor he knew for one day. All this only told the chimp something more was at work in the castle, and he would find out what. He stalked away, forging a path through all the debris and trash until he came to the source of a glow, which to his irritation, wasn't a fire.

"Friend, don't go there!" the book was shouting behind him, "bad!"

"Everything, bad," Caesar said in return.

He found himself in front of a glass jar and inside, what appeared to be a single rose. It was glowing, which meant it was probably toxic. He didn't particularly like Koba, but Caesar didn't have it in him to let everyone in the castle die of radiation poisoning. Before he could lay a finger on the jar, something slammed into him and he was flat on his back.

Koba glared down at him, frantic and almost frothing, as if Caesar had just attempted to murder him.

"Who let you in!?" the bonobo screeched.

"Not me!" Bad Ape was quick to say.

"We told you!" Koba continued, "do not go into West Wing! You don't obey!"

Caesar crawled to his feet, Koba dragging him up by the collar and raging like a wild animal.

"Why you here!?"

"Why are you here?" Caesar retorted.

Koba threw him towards a pile of wood, and if Caesar hadn't rolled away in time, he was sure his brain would be splattered on the ground. Before Koba could reach for him again, Caesar pushed past the bonobo and galloped away on all fours. Enough was enough! The adrenaline pushed him to think and all logic told him to leave now while Koba was distracted. He heard Koba run after him, but he didn't care.

"Where are you going?" Maurice signed when Caesar ran past.

"Home," he replied. Home before Koba murdered him then and there.

But- the entire staff seemed to say. Caesar ignored all of them.

On second thought, maybe running away so hastily into a snowy forest wasn't the best plan Caesar ever had. He made his way through the dark, shivering and huffing as he wondered what to do next. First, he'd have to find the right direction. Then return to Muir. But a little voice was nagging at the back of his head, telling him that he'd abandoned the castle before finding the root of its problems. Surely, everyone there hadn't always been furniture.

That wasn't his problem. Caesar walked on. But what if it was? Maybe they'd never have another "visitor" again. What about Cornelia and her children? Could he really leave them to rot and be forgotten? As he debated these questions, a noise stopped him in his tracks. A pair of glowing eyes stood in front of him- a bear.

Caesar turned to run, felt the bear's claws rip into one sleeve, and slid into the snow. The bear's weight was upon him, its breath along his neck and teeth bared wide. Just when his life began flashing before his eyes- and unfortunately, many of these flashbacks involved the colonel throwing bananas at him- the bear cried out in pain. It bucked off him and stood to face the newcomer.

Caesar recognized that scarred face- Koba.

A spear was lodged in the bear's side. Koba got on all fours, he and the bear circling one another with snarls and growls, each competing to see who was meanest. Caesar heard himself gasp when the two suddenly clashed, rolling in the snow as they bit and scratched. He watched in horror as Koba literally sank his teeth into the bear's neck. In turn, the bonobo was slammed in the head and sent crashing three feet away. As the bear struggled with its wounds, Koba regained his sense and dashed back into the fight.

They rumbled through broken branches and cracking snow again, tearing at each other's throats. Koba hissed when a set of claws slashed across his arm, fresh blood slapping onto the ground. And in a rage, he tackled the bear's side and pushed the spear clean in. The bear fell with another cry, the snow turning pink under it. Koba crawled out from under his opponent, stood, swayed, and hit the ice.

Caesar blinked. That had all taken place within a matter of seconds. Feeling his own heart pound, he approached on stiff legs. The bear was a goner, that he was sure of. He looked down at Koba. The bonobo was breathing by all accounts and the blood loss was slow. Caesar dropped down and looked at his face, twisted into a bloodied grimace.

"Koba," he said, "Koba!"

But the bonobo was out. And that little voice came back. If Koba had followed him out, he'd be able to make his escape. Koba was in no condition to chase him. But if he did that, Koba would die out here. And even if Koba had pursued him, the bonobo had saved his life. Koba had saved his life. This much was true, and a part of Caesar felt oddly moved by the gesture, that maybe under it all, Koba was a good ape after all.

But it didn't matter if Koba was good or not. He'd saved Caesar. And that meant the chimp would return the favor. Without a second thought, Caesar bent and put the bonobo's arm over his shoulder. After he managed to get Koba onto his back, Caesar began trekking towards the castle.

The truth was Koba's staff knew their master was not particularly likable, and still, they'd put all their hopes in that handsome chimp. But the bonobo had frightened Caesar away and just when they were all so sure all was lost, Caesar returned with Koba in tow. The chimp had stormed into the castle with a ferocity that almost convinced them he was the new alpha. Even Rocket had been silenced by his new demeanor.

The servants also learned that Caesar really was more than a pretty face. Under his orders, they cleaned their master's wounds, set him in bed, and watched Caesar bandage him up in a few quick snips. And when all was done, Maurice lit a fire in the bedroom while Caesar calmed Koba's fever with a damp towel.

"You came back," Cornelia puffed, "why?"

"He saved me," Caesar said, "I can't leave him." Followed by, "ape not kill ape."

Then the chimp looked to the gathered servants and asked, "Why don't you leave him? Does he treat you well?"

They all looked to each other, a mutual awkwardness in their eyes.

"Koba mad," Bad Ape said, "seems bad. But not always."

"He's been through much," Lake added, "used to be a prince. His family was at war with humans. He lost much."

"He used to be good to us," Maurice signed, "before the curse."

Caesar had a hunch he knew what was happening. That war had taken place long ago- then that meant... how old was everyone here? Had they simply been stuck here, trapped in time? But the word "curse" made him tilt his head.

"A human woman needed help," Rocket answered, "Koba cast her out. She cursed him, cursed us."

"His eye," Caesar concluded. Then he scratched his ear. "But why curse you?"

The servants collectively rolled their eyes, even the teacups.

"Don't know," Rocket signed, "I think she was just a bitch."

OK. Well, now Caesar knew the root of his problems and he wasn't sure if all the science in the world could save them. And still, he found himself feeling waves of sympathy for the castle's little tribe, Koba included. "The curse, how do we lift it?"

Another awkward silence, as if nobody was willing to say anything. Only Cornelius hopped up to him, trying in vain to communicate- the little teacup was blowing kisses into the air. Caesar had no idea what that meant.

Koba awoke, mind disoriented and foggy. He was aware of the soft sheets first. Then the warmth. And finally, a sharp jab of pain. He hissed aloud, eyes flying to the bandages around his arm. It came back to him- Caesar in the west wing, the damned chimpanzee running off, and the fight with the bear.

"How do you feel?" a familiar voice asked, much smoother than Koba's own.

The bonobo looked up, jaw slack at the realization that not only had Caesar not escaped, he'd stayed. Because I saved him, he rationalized. As if Caesar would have stayed otherwise. So Koba shot him a glare and said, "fine."

He lifted the limb and pointed at the gauze. "Who?"

Caesar pointed at himself, looking rather done with Koba's antics. That pissed the bonobo off even more. "Why?"

"Only I have opposable thumbs," the chimp said matter-of-factly.

Koba had nothing to say to that.

"Fine now," the bonobo said, "go to your room."

"No!"

"What-"

"You heard me," Caesar growled, "no."

And then it was Caesar towering over him, the fire in his green eyes thoroughly shutting Koba up. "I stay here until you're better. Now eat." On cue, Maurice and Cornelia dropped a tray into Caesar's waiting hands, a bowl of familiar soup and water.

Caesar placed the tray on his lap and held up a spoon of all things. It was as if their positions had been reversed. Koba opened his mouth to protest, only for Caesar to stick the spoon in.

"And," the chimp said, "thank you."

He removed the spoon. Koba swallowed the soup, trying to glare daggers at the chimp. When Caesar returned it, the bonobo, to his utter surprise, felt his own heart skip a beat, whatever that meant. He hadn't cared for this Caesar at first; the chimp smelled of human all over and had been nothing but a submissive pushover, an annoying but ideal prisoner. And now, seeing his defiance, the way he commanded the servants and himself, Koba felt something new- Caesar was strong and as loathe as he was to admit it, Koba was suddenly drawn to him like a moth to a flame.

"Caesar weak," Koba whispered to himself, "Koba weaker."

The chimp didn't hear him, but something changed between them that night, and that was enough for both.

Thanks for reading and being patient with me! Hope this chapter was fun!

Next time, we'll see what everyone at Muir is up to and what happens now that Caesar and Koba don't hate each other anymore.