Title: Break-Up
Pairing: Perry
Cox/John Dorian
Prompt: 03: Ends
Word Count: 363
Rating:
PG-13
Spoilers: None
Warnings: angst, slash
Authors Notes:
Third in a mini series. Follows Claim and Plaything.
It took me three days to finally get the courage to talk to Dr. Cox. During those three days I tried to savor our moments together, tried to gather as many memories as I could before the end, so I'd have something to look back on and appreciate. Because I knew, when I asked him if he wanted an actual relationship from me, if I used the word boyfriend, things were going to go badly.
And whoo boy was I right. As soon as I started that conversation, he went all red in the face, the vein in his temple started to throb, and I swear he swiped his thumb across the side of his nose enough times that it was now thinner then the other side. I don't really want to go through everything he said, but believe me when I tell you that some of the things he said are going to hurt to think about for a long time still. I can't really remember the night that followed. All I know is that I got my first real introduction to the world of hard liquor, I cried a lot, and woke up in the morning with what had to have been the worst hangover I've ever had.
So now I'm alone again, and I'm not sure if I really am better off then when I was being used as a toy. Because now I know what it was actually like to be with Perry Cox, and now my fantasies are never going to be as good, as satisfying, as the real thing. But I'm going to have to get use to it, because I do know it isn't good for me to let him treat me this way ever again. That's why I've gone to Kelso. That's why after four years of working at Sacred Heart, I asked Kelso for a transfer, and at this point I don't even care where I end up. As long as it was far away from the biggest mistake I ever made in my life. Far away from the man that would never have loved me in the way I wanted him to.