A/N: Sorry for this being late! Hope you enjoy.
Chapter Three: "Do They Hurt?"
My fingers gripped tighter against the flimsy stone of the counter. I felt the solid material begin to crack underneath the pressure as I continued to glare at my own image. Who had ever come up with the idea of reflective surfaces? I pondered as I studied my reflection. The monster within had gleaming red eyes and ravaged skin. Flesh that had been bitten and clawed at for most of its existence. The crescent shapes were everywhere, overlapping repeatedly again and again. They were raised above the natural surface, like uneven welts, causing the face to look almost inflamed. The disfigurement didn't even cease at the face. No, they continued down across jaw line, and then traveled down the neck. Piling over more than ever, and screaming the word dangerous to whatever immortal was to pass by. That's when they really became visible. Across his collar bone, over the planes of the chest, biting right through the abdominals…a never ending pattern of half-moons that were there to remind him of what he truly was. I was the monster. I was death.
What had I been thinking back in the diner? Why had I ever thought that I would be able to keep my past from her? She had seen these scars when she looked at my face. She had to have seen these scars in her visions, before she ever met me in person. Why had she come to find me?
And yet she knew nothing of it. She hadn't reacted to the sight of my face like she should have. She didn't hiss or try to defend herself. She didn't turn and retreat in the other direction. She didn't even flinch, or stop to consider the possibility that I might be dangerous! No. Instead she marveled at it, as if I were a work of art.
I sighed, knowing that the question would soon become inevitable. She would ask eventually. She would want to know.
A knock on the door pulled me away from my self- loathing. I clenched my teeth together, feeling her concern from the other room.
"Jasper? Are you alright? I can feel your… detestation, from out here…Is something wrong?" Her bell-like voice called through the door. I closed my eyes immediately, silently cursing at myself as I tried to get a grip on my own emotions.
"Yes. I'm fine. I apologize. I didn't realize…" I trailed off, catching my reflection again when I opened my lids. "I'll be out in a moment."
I zipped up the pair of dirty jeans that hung loosely from my waist, and grabbed onto the button-down shirt that dangled from the towel rack. I listened to see if she had backed away from the door as I slid the material over my shoulders, hurriedly folding each button into place. I tried the best I could to press my damp hair down against my forehead in somewhat of a neat manner before opening the bathroom door.
She sat at the edge of the bed, one leg folded under the other. She smiled at me as I emerged, and sprung up to her feet at once. I walked a few steps closer to her, smiling back. She craned her neck in order to look up at my face, giggled, and then rose herself on the tips of her toes so she could run her hand through my golden locks- reversing the small amount of effort I put into looking presentable.
"You need new clothes." She stated, excitement ringing in her tone.
My eyebrows knitted together in confusion. New clothes? To me these were new. I had taken them off the back of my last male victim, the same way I always retrieved such necessities. But she couldn't possibly mean that way of obtaining clothing, not from how averse she seemed to be when it came to the murder of humans… Theft, perhaps?
"We should go shopping before the sun comes out. It should be drizzling for most of the afternoon, though." She said. I turned my attention to the window, surprised to already see the bright light illuminating from behind the thick cover of clouds. The night had passed all too quickly. We had spent most of it deciding the most productive routes that we could take in order to travel to the Cullens. But now that we had one singled out, it all seemed too real.
And now she spoke of shopping. Wow. I hadn't been shopping in god knows how long. It was then that I noticed her change of wardrobe. She now wore a black tailored coat - that was much more weather appropriate then the blouse she wore before - along with nice, expensive looking dress pants. I supposed that my more country look wouldn't fit in as much up here in the North.
"I don't exactly have a bank account Miss Alice…" I told her, a sheepish grin on my face. But then again, I shouldn't have been embarrassed. It was really her that should feel as though she were an outcast. Vampires didn't need money. Our strength, speed, and over-all agility was enough to provide us with anything we could ever possibly want. Of course I wasn't entirely broke; I did have a rather decent amount of cash tucked away in a tin box back at Peter's place.
"But I do." She answered happily, dancing over to the far end of the room in order to remove her purse from the coffee table. My grin fell, guilt seeping into me almost immediately. I most certainly didn't want to become some form of a financial burden. Taking any amount of money from the girl seemed to be of the utmost rudeness.
"Miss Alice, I couldn't…" I tried to object, but she wasn't having any of it.
"Don't be silly Jasper, of course you can. And would you please stop with the Miss Alice? You can call me Alice. Ali if you prefer." She told me. I noticed how much effort she was putting into appearing annoyed, but she couldn't fool me. I was easily able to tell how much the formal address flattered her. I smirked anyways.
"Ali." I said, enjoying the way it sounded when mixed in with my southern tongue. She did as well. Her smile grew brighter, and her lust came forward just a bit more.
"Very well then." She said, reaching for my hand. I took it without second thought, and allowed her to lead me out the door.
I continued to be tugged through the streets, weaving in and out of numerous people who were also taking advantage of the cooler weather. The burning in my throat was less of a burden since I had been hunting recently, but it was still there, and still very much of a threat.
I gave a low chuckle at how much excitement this activity brought her, and silently wondered how much money she could possibly have in that purse; as I was already elbow high in brown paper bags. This couldn't go on much longer, could it? My lord I sure hope not…
"Just one more!" She promised, sensing my discomfort. She dragged me into a small haberdashery, nothing but pure delight on her face. I eternally groaned, now knowing the purpose of the clean collared shirts she all but forced upon me.
"A tie? Really Alice? When will this ever become necessary?" I complained. She did nothing but laugh at me, shoving a specific bag onto my chest. I sighed, rolling my eyes and dropping the rest of the bags as I made my way to the single dressing room in the corner of the store. I pushed through the curtain and began un-doing the buttons of my most comfortable, old and familiar dark-blue button down. I carefully pulled on the white, fancy material, collared long sleeve and hesitated as I gently worked on each metal clasp. I brushed it out, and fixed the neck appropriately as I observed myself in the mirror. It's not that I was opposed to the attention I would receive; I just felt that this was her way of making me worthy of whatever future she had planned for us.
I sighed, exiting the dressing room while scraping the paper bags I had been carrying along the floor with my foot. She gave me a smile of approval, and held out the black silk tie for me to take. I looked at it shyly, sharing my sliver of embarrassment with her.
"You don't know how to tie a tie?" She guessed, amusement in her eyes.
"It's been awhile." I mumbled. I stood still as she struggled to place the thing around my neck. I could feel her breath tickling my skin as her fingers skillfully worked on the knot. I gazed down at her, studying the perfect features of her face, my eyes resting on her full, pink lips.
"There." She announced, pulling me out of my trance. She stepped back in order to look over me in approval. "Perfect."
I wanted to laugh at her false statement, for I knew that my appearance was nowhere near perfect. But that didn't matter. What mattered was the fact that – for whatever reason – my exterior was causing her to be happier than ever, and I would be happy about it as well.
"Now, how do you suppose we are going to carry all of this stuff with us while we travel? Let's not even mention the rest of your clothing back at the hotel." I said.
She rolled her eyes at me, smile still intact.
"I have bags. You have arms." She said matter-of-factly. I couldn't help but laugh out loud as she began to undo my tie.
"I'll pay you back for all of this." I told her, this time speaking softly. She slid the silk off my shoulders, heading to the clerk. She paid the man, and stuffed the tie into one of the bags. She came back to me, shaking her head.
"No you won't. I won't let you." She said simply.
I chuckled, "You're a stubborn little thing, aren't you? How can you even afford all this?"
She smirked up at me.
"Ever play poker with a psychic?"
I laughed at that.
"Can't say that I have."
The day had seemed to come to a close as we now headed back up to the hotel room, the date set in our minds. Tomorrow we would set out to search for the Cullens in order to find a better life.
My life was already better. My life got better the second she danced right on into it. Her emotions were a constant state of joy, peace and happiness. A climate of which I found myself easily gravitating towards. As long as I could be near her I would be content. And as selfish as it was, I knew that having to share her with five other people would become rather frustrating. I knew that I would be perfectly blissful if we could just stay together on our own, and travel together like Peter and Charlotte had done before they settled into a permanent residence. We could even do that if she truly was attached to the idea of the coven life… but that wasn't what she wanted. I knew what she wanted. And I knew what would make her happy. She was attached to the idea of that coven. The Cullens. That's was what would make her the happiest. And even after just knowing her for a little over twenty-four hours, I found myself dedicated to doing whatever would make her happiest.
Once inside the room, we began to pack our things into the two black duffel bags she had stashed under the bed. A smile came across my face as I listened to her aimless rambling about the Cullens. I listened to some of it, catching a few details here and there. Something about the leader being a doctor, and his mate liking to renovate. I was really only focused on absorbing all the joy that the subject gave her, and observing how graceful she was as she twirled around the room while stashing bits of clothing into the bags neatly. I would be able to recite everything she told me, of course, although none of it really processed through my mind.
I was surprised to find that everything she had bought, on top of her own clothes, all together only occupied two bags. I could have sworn we would have needed at least four. I supposed that her obsession with clothes was something that I would just have to get used to if we were going to be spending what I hoped was the rest of eternity together…
We had finished the packing in a matter of minutes, feeling the need to take our time since we wouldn't be leaving until sunrise. She had pretty much exhausted herself of all the details her latest visions supplied her with. I could tell that it would soon be my turn to talk, for I could feel curiosity taking place of some of the enthusiasm that was stored in her.
"How did you find Charlotte and Peter?" She asked quietly. I could feel that she was shy about it; worried that she might be intruding.
I sighed, setting the bag I had just finished packing onto the ground beside the end table.
"Sorry." She practically whispered, "I didn't mean to…"
"It's fine." I said automatically, not wanting to upset her. "It's just that…"
I paused, trying to find the easiest, less frightening way to put this. I sat down at the edge of the bed, turning to where she was standing. I could feel her hesitation towards sitting across from me, knowing how I had reacted to it before. She continued to stand, arms at her side.
I looked into her eyes, searching for any sign of fear or doubt. Any type of emotion that could cause her to send me out the door. I found none.
"My past…" I started, my voice low and non-threatening. "It isn't as simple as it may have appeared to be in your visions."
She stood there for a while, taking in the words. She nodded slowly with understanding, this time not hesitating to sit on the opposing side of the mattress, her back rested against the headboard. I shifted a little, uncomfortable, but allowed it.
"I wasn't always with Peter." I continued, "Actually, I created Peter."
She looked to me in surprise, but continued to say nothing. I looked at her face then. Her bright topaz eyes and long thick lashes lay on top of her small pointed nose. Her high cheekbones fit nicely into her diamond face, which was crowned with short, dark hair that spiked in every direction. She was beautiful, and I would lose all that through the words I was about to say to her. I opened my mouth, but nothing would come out. I couldn't lose her.
"This story…" She whispered quietly, "It has to do with how you got your scars…doesn't it?"
I looked down then, not wanting to confirm her assumption. I felt her move closer to me on the bed, and I tried my hardest not to flinch away from her when I felt her hand come to my face. I looked up at her, and was immediately struck with strong feelings of concern and sympathy. "Don't pity me, Alice," I breathed. I leaned into her touch, and watched carefully as she brought her other hand up to trace over the scar right above my brow. Her fingers were feather light against my stony skin, and her breath fell across my face. Her intoxicating scent filled my lungs as she continued to caress my face delicately.
"Do they hurt?" She asked softly. I closed my eyes, ever so lightly shaking my head 'no'.
The hand that was cupping my cheek now moved lower. She brushed her thumb over my jaw as she came down to my neck, right above my shirt collar. Automatically, my hand flew up and caught her by the wrist, disabling her lingering hand from going down any further. I wasn't about to let her see the worse of them.
My eyes flew open as well, catching her panicked look.
"I'm sorry." She said quickly, her voice high and nervous.
I nodded to her, assuring her that everything was perfectly fine.
"We should pull out the maps again." I said, "Go over the route we're taking, just to be safe."
Her hands dropped back to her sides, and she was on her feet in seconds. I had managed to avoid the topic of my past for now, but it was only a matter of time before it came up again. And when I told her, there was no question that she would ask me to leave.
She pulled the maps out of the bedside table, laying them across the bed. My eyes locked on the bold line cutting through the country.
How far would I make it?
A/N: Sorry for kind of killing the fluff at the end... heh. Review Please. And thanks to my Beta! - Passion Assassin