Thanks For all the reviews guys, muchly appreciated! In this chapter I am going to Introduce Buffy's point of view, Also I'm going to introduce flashbacks denoted by italics and /flashback/ and /end flashback/

Chapter 3

Welcome To Disapointment

Faiths POV

2 Days Later

That old gut instinct to run is kicking in right about now, I mean so far it has been good, Willow and myself have hit it off quick, I s'pose she understands me a little more now, what with the whole Tara thing. I never did meet her, well in my body anyway, but she seemed pretty cool, a little shy, but obviously Red fell for her hard.

Buffy and I haven't had a chance to have tea and cookies yet, she had to go on one of those Slayer Quest things, hoping that it would help her discover why she is still struggling, she's coming back today and given the reception I have received from Xander, and Dawns obvious avoidance of me, I can't say I'm looking forward to it. Hence, run.

Its not like I haven't tried, I did try and have a talk with Xander, but damn it, it's like talking to a brick wall sometimes. It just seems that, no matter what I do, how much I try to show them I have changed how much I apologise…. I just guess I keep fucking it up….

And that is why I try to stay out of their way; I stay in my room, the basement, until I'm called on. It's a pretty good set up down here, single bed, TV, sink, microwave for them 3am hungrys, and the best bit, my own punching bag and weight set.

As I stand here, taking out all my frustration on the punching bag, I can't help but think of my talk with Xander, I just don't know how I am gonna make that better….

/Flashback/

I walk past the lounge room again, Xander has been here for close to an hour and no words have been spoken, he just sits there, with what looks like an old Superman Comic, reading it over and over again. No time like the present eh? I back track and take a seat in the arm chair near him, trying to appear as non-threatening as possible.

"Xander, err, I think we needa talk." He stops reading his comic and gives me a look, that should be warning enough, the look screams 'I'm not gonna listen', but I needa say this. "I'm sorry. About everything I done back then, I was totally screwed up and instead of letting you guys help me, or even asking for help, I screwed you all." A smile comes to my face as I think of what I just said, and how I know, right now, he is thinking about we did, and then what I did to him.

"I was a jerk, to say the least, but before that I thought you were a pretty wicked guy and if there is anything I can do to make up for it, consider it done" I finish with what I hope is a genuine smile

"Anything?" he asks incredulously "Hows about leaving Sunnydale and never coming back, or, how about, going back a few years and never trying to use or kill us all? No, but I forgive ya Faith, I mean, that was one 'nifty' speech just now." His sarcasm is evident and I am finding it incredibly hard to control my temper

"You know what Xander? I deserve all that and plenty more but I am here for a reason, this is my job and Red is my watcher. So, welcome to disappointment son, I'm here to stay!" I stand up and go to walk to the basement, but the idiot in me, stops and turns to him again

"I don't expect you to forgive me but I did expect you to have grown up a little and realise that in this world, things aren't as simple as Black and White, I have to live with what I have done for the rest of my life, you don't! I realise that no matter how many times I say I'm sorry it isn't going to fix it, but saying sorry, that's for me" for the first time in so long I feel tears stinging my eyes, the anger and walls I spent so long hiding behind, a distant memory.

"Ya done?" He sneers at me

"You know what Xander? Get fucked!" with that he starts reading his comic again as I storm down the basement stairs, tape up my hand, and start pounding the punching bag

/End Flashback/

"Faith? You down here?" I hear Dawn call as she makes her way down the basement steps, please, for the sake of my sanity, don't be here to piss me off more.

"Hey Kiddo, sorry, I was lost in my own head, not a pretty place to be, what can I do ya for?"

She stands in front of me, nearly at my eye height, looking nervous and cute as hell. I've always had a soft spot for this kid, and as she has aged, damn, she is looking pretty hot, must be them damn Summer's genes.

"I missed that you know?" she says almost coyly "You calling me Kiddo." She smiles at me in an act I think she purposely used to let me know she isn't gonna bitch me out.

"And I missed calling you Kiddo." I nod and smile at her "Now what's the what?"

"Faith, I heard you and Xander before, and I just want to tell you that in my books, you're forgiven. You were at a low point, and yes, you did some really messed up things, but you rose above it, I missed you, and it's good to have you home" As she says it she turns around, about to ascend the stairs once more.

"Dawnie?" I jog over to her and place my hand on her arm. "Thank you. You don't know how much that means to me" As she looks up at me, smiling, I do something so un-Faith like, that it scares both of us. I pull her into a hug.

After a few minutes of her resting her head against my shoulder, I pull away

"That's enough sap for one day, let's go upstairs before they think I have killed you"

Buffy's POV

Ok so I knew it was being arranged for Faith to be released, I just didn't think it would be so soon, she is at my house right now. I can't say that I don't hate her anymore, but after everything that has happened I feel a weird closeness to her, like never before and I haven't even seen her yet.

Its just…..just……AGH, This is me, Buffy "The Slayer" Summers, even when Faith was around the first time, I was still "The Slayer".

I've had to adapt my whole life to suit that and now, well now Faith has been released because I just don't cut it anymore? My strength is all screwy; but getting stronger by the day, but what happens if Faith flips it? Tries to kill everyone again? I won't be able to protect them!

I am just your average girl now, something I have wanted for so long, but now that it's gone, the power, the responsibility, the very thing I have spent 7 years learning to live with, I would do anything to have it back. Who am I without being Buffy, The Vampire Slayer?

I let out an audible sigh, as I postpone opening my own front door, the neighbours might start to ask questions if I just sit here and stare at my front door all night.

I unlock the door and kinda stumble through and nearly trip over my own feet. God, I'm so hopeless. I can feel Faith, I know she is here and I know she is close; I get this…..this…..this I don't know? Sense, like a buzzing feeling, a vampire tingle, only good, nice, comforting, everything Faith isn't.

I'm scared; I fear what this confrontation will bring? I'm so angry that she can make me feel so weak, weaker than I already am.

My anger begins to increase rapidly and I haven't felt so alive in a long time, anger does that to you, makes you feel, like a wash of these emotions all working together all plotting against one thing, it changes everything, not only you but the people around you, they see you tense and relax all at the same time, they see the conflicts of emotions and they see the resolve and they act on that, they run, hide, yell and scream but it doesn't make a difference because it is about you and in the end all you're left with is anger, no logic, no love, just anger. In your life you will have loved and lost so much that you are almost incapable of feeling love anymore. You guard yourself and surround yourself with a sea of anger and despair and passion till you are no longer capable to love, to accept, to be…

And in all my thoughts I nearly run into her, she looks like she is in a hurry to leave and all of a sudden the confusion I was feeling at seeing her, is replaced with that anger again.

"Faith" I say her name through gritted teeth and in this moment I know, I will always be "The Slayer" no matter what, it's just me

"Buffy, Hi" its funny she seems so scared of me and she knows I'm weak.

And suddenly there is fear again, Faith, running out of the house, after a quick scan on my house, my family and friends are no where to be seen. What has she done?

"Where are they!" I ask. As I step too close into her personal space, my senses are attacked by all things Faith, the smell of Chocolate, smoke and sweat. My eyes burning holes through hers, exploring, finding, searching.

"Who is where?" She looks honestly confused and that is quickly replaced by hurt as she realises what I am asking.

"Oh, out back." She says and points through the kitchen, slightly brushing past me through the front door.

As I register what just happened, I realise something, 'Damn, I may have just fucked up', I didn't even give her a chance, but, does she deserve it?

TBC

Thank you to my lovely reviewers, and as I said, feedback is our friend! Let me know what you like, what you hate, and how you think I can improve.