Disclaimer: I only own my own ideas, nothing else.
Summary: In this first chapter of Yen's Revenge Kimiko is continued to be tortured. She must figure out what is going on with her through this time and find out what has become of courage. Will Kimiko keep feeling tortured or will she find Sweet Dreams?
Chapter 1: Sweet Dreams
"Daddy!" I shot up out of bed crying in misery. "Daddy! I just want my daddy!"I doubled over sobbing on my mat. I couldn't take it anymore. I just couldn't take these dreams anymore. It hurt; it has really started to hurt.
"Dah-hah-dy!" I cried out just before a pair of arms wrapped themselves around my body. And that only made me cry harder.
"Kim, calm down." My best friend told me. "Kim, you have to calm down." That settled my tears. I turned around and buried my head into his shoulder. I let out all of my pain and frustrastions in that one crying spell, and I cried on his shoulder for several minutes. All the while he rubbed my back and talked soothingly to me. I slowly pulled back and looked at him with teary eyes.
"I can't take this anymore." I said quietly. "I want to know why I am having these dreams." Raimundo softly looked back at me trying to come up with an answer.
"I wish I knew." He said. "I really wish I knew." Raimundo couldn't take his eyes off of me as he spoke, and in that moment I found what I had always been looking for in his eyes. A deep look of love. I leaned close to him and brushed my lips close to his face wanting so badly just to kiss him, but as he came closer a strange pain shot through my head. I screamed out and doubled over.
"What is happening to me?" I yelled. As I kneeled over with my hands and knees on the ground a roll of thunder crashed and Omi ran into my room.
"I sense a strong evil!" Omi yelled over the noise of my crying and the storm that was beginning to brew.
"I sense it too." I heard Raimundo say as he rubbed my back.
"But this is an evil more evil than Wuya, Chase Young, Hannible Roy Bean, and even Jack Spicer put together!" Omi yelled. Raimundo nodded and while all of that was going on, I just stayed in the floor pouring my heart out in tears. I just couldn't take the pain. Clay ran in hollering.
"What in the heck is going on in here?"
"I think the question," Everybody turned to look as Master Fung appeared by my curtain. "Is, what is going on out there?" We all looked out the hallway window watching as a tornado spun past.
"It's not even storm season." Raimundo said. I managed to get up and something inside of me made me walk all the way to the door and open it.
"Kimiko!" I heard everybody scream my name, but I didn't care. I wanted to know what was going on, and what it had to do with me. I kept walking, like some sort of magnet was pulling me.
"Kimiko." I heard a faint voice say. "Kimiko." I squinted my eyes to take a closer look at the tornado spinning in front of me. It almost seemed as if somebody was riding it. I took one more step closer, still hearing my name called. But that last step sent a shot of pain to my head and I felt myself giving way.
"Kimiko!" I heard a cry of distress from Raimundo just before I hit the ground.
"Daddy, I'm scared!" I cried, standing off to myself in the corner. I looked at my dad but it wasn't sympathy I saw in his eyes, it was anger.
"You have to find the courage," He said. "There is no need for fear in this life." I pushed myself in the corner grabbing at the curtain hanging next to me.
"I-I can't. I can't find the courage, I just don't know how!"
"You have to!" The words echoed in my ears as my daddy continued to push me in the corner. "You have to, you have to!" I crumpled on the floor sobbing, in sudden fear of my dad.
"Daddy no!" Just as I cried out my daddy's form flashed into that of a green dragon, but it only lasted for a second. I pulled my knees close to my body for comfort, and I just kept crying.
I woke up, tears running down my face, and looked up at Raimundo who was sitting on the floor beside my mat.
"Are you okay?"
"Hmm." I slowly allowed myself to slip out of my fog as I looked up into his eyes. "What happened, Rai?"
"It was just a freak storm." Raimundo replied. "But you got too close." I let out a deep sigh as I slowly sat up.
"Did you have another dream?" Raimundo asked. I slowly nodded my head as I swept my hand across my mat to get a feel of what was real around me.
"I can't seem to shake this." I said. "I think there's something wrong with me."
"There is nothing wrong with you." Raimundo shook his head. "Maybe, you're just afraid…"
"Afraid of what?" I asked him.
"Reality." He changed his choice of words when he saw the look that I gave him. "Well, not reality so much as… change?"
"Change?"
"Yeah," Raimundo nodded. "There is a lot of change going on lately, and it causes stress on all of us." He gave me a sweet sympathetic look. "I'd understand if you want me to step down as Shoku Warrior."
"What? No!" I stood up fast. "Why would you even say that?" Raimundo shrugged and stood up so that he could be at eye level with me.
"I just think, maybe you are afraid that I will drift away from you, away from all of you." I stopped and slowly shook my head, my thoughts becoming clearer.
"Of course I don't want to lose you, but that doesn't mean that I want you to lose what you have worked so hard for."
"Okay…" Raimundo said slowly rubbing on my arm. "Are you sure that's not what's bothering you?" I looked down at my mat as a tear ran down my cheek.
"Maybe." I said softly. "Just maybe, I'm afraid of losing you…"
"Ok, look." Raimundo lifted my chin back up to speak to me. "That is never gonna happen! Ok?" I bit my lip and nodded.
"Okay." Raimundo continued to move his hand up and down my upper arm.
"Do you feel better now?"
"I think…" I nodded. "Maybe I do." Then Raimundo grinned his award winning grin and my heart fluttered in my chest.
"Good," He said. "I'm glad we got past that." I nodded, that seemed to be the only thing I could do in his presence. He always left me so… speechless.
"I am too." I said once I could find words to speak.
"And I look forward to you being happier and feeling better." He smiled.
"Yeah," I grinned back suddenly feeling much brighter and lighter. "I am too!"
I spent the next few days in a daze, unsure of myself and my feelings. I honestly thought something was going on with me, something more than just teenage hormones. I had spent weeks in fear and worry that my dreams and nightmares were making me really sick, or even that I was having those dreams and nightmares because I was already sick. But maybe… It's just love. I mean, I do love him, I love him so much. But I have gone for four years without being with him, I mean, really being with him. Four long years… Oh, I can't settle my mind…
I sighed and sat down on the front step of the porch. I was still in my pajamas, grey sweatpants, and a soft black hoodie. I pulled my pant legs up slightly and began playing with my toes.
"What is going on with me?" I thought out loud. "Am I just so in love that it makes sick? Is this why I am having these dreams?"
"Kimiko?" I heard a soft, shy voice say behind me. "Do you need to talk?" I turned my neck to see Omi standing slightly behind me.
"Are you sick?" He asked ever so quietly. I nodded, but then shook my head. I couldn't seem to settle on an answer, so I just shrugged my shoulders.
"I don't know, Omi, honestly I don't." Omi sighed and sat quietly beside me.
"Are you love sick?"
"I-" I sighed and sat with my mouth open for a moment. A tear escaped my eye and I moved quickly to wipe it away.
"I don't know what I am supposed to tell you, Omi. I know that I am in-love, and I know that I am sick. But I can't tell you if the two are connected." A few more tears escaped my eyes but I allowed these to run.
"Kimiko, if I may say so, I believe that you are very sick." I let a short sob out and shook my head, but at the same time I had to laugh at my sweet little friend.
"Thanks Omi, for that observation."
"But if it helps," Omi added. "It is a good kind of sick." I looked at him out of the corner of my eye and sincerely said.
"Thank you, Omi." Omi smiled and bounded back up the stairs, but he turned to look at me just before going back inside and said.
"You are most welcome, my dear friend!" I turned back and watched him go inside, the smile fading from my face. What did he mean by 'good kind of sick'? But as I began contemplating the thought, my stomach turned over and I jumped up and ran to the bushes to retch. I backed out coughing away the bad taste. I wiped my mouth and reached for the water bottle that I had brought outside with me. After taking a few sips I sat back down. Then burying my head in my hands, I cried out.
"What is wrong with me?"
I sat in the medical room of the temple with wires sticking in my hair and tubes running up and down my arms. I was in the middle of many tests trying to determine what was wrong with me. Dojo was sitting on my shoulder moving around wires and Master Fung was studying my eyes with a flashlight. All of this testing was beginning to hurt me, but I had to sit through it all.
"Hmm," Dojo sighed. "There seems to be nothing wrong with her brain waves." He stated. 'Yeah, cause that's a bad thing' I thought as I rolled my eyes at the little green dragon.
"Uhm, I didn't mean that the way it sounded." He replied quickly.
"I know." I said quietly. Master Fung put down his flashlight and let out a long sigh.
"We can't seem to find out what is wrong with you Kimiko." He said, and I could tell he was ready to ask me an important question.
"Are you willing to take a CAT scan?" I nodded slowly.
"I am willing to do whatever tests will determine what's going on with me." Master Fung nodded then Dojo and he proceeded to remove the tubes and wires. When they were finished I quietly got up and moved to the table that would slip me into the CAT scan. I laid back and let Master Fung move the table in. I had my eyes closed when I went in, but once I opened my eyes I felt my breath begin to get heavy. The machine started up as my breath became heavier and heavier. I started to shudder and moved my eyes over the walls surrounding me every way. Then I began to sweat and felt my skin heating up.
"No." I cried silently. "No, no, no." My voice got louder each time I spoke the word "no", until I was just screaming it out.
"No!" I screamed. "No, get me out of here! I wanna get out of here!" By then I was seriously freaking out, shaking and pounding the walls around me. I was sobbing, calling out Master Fung's and Dojo's names in every attempt to get myself out of here. Finally, I felt the table moving and was soon out in the open again. I sat up and jumped off the table crying. I fell on the floor in a crumpled mess and began screaming out random words that didn't even make any sense to me. As Master Fung and Dojo stood silently watching me, I heard the door open and Raimundo say.
"What's going on in here?" I jumped up and threw myself in his arms, hoping that he was my escape out of this room. "Are you okay, Kim?" I shook my head and cried out even louder. Raimundo held me tighter and asked Master Fung.
"Did you find out what's wrong with her?" I never heard Master Fung answer and I didn't look back to see if he had nodded or shook his head. I just stood there in Raimundo's arms crying out all of my pain.
"I'm tired." I told my best friend as we sat on the couch together watching a movie on my laptop. It was the day after all of my tests and I never did hear what was wrong with me, I just assumed Master Fung never figured it out.
"I know." Was all Raimundo said. I sighed and slid closer to him on the couch. He was being way too quiet lately, and that only added to my depression.
"What's going on, Rai?" I asked. He looked into my eyes and sighed. I don't think he wanted to tell me. But he did.
"I know what's wrong with you." My heart skipped a beat
"You what?" He didn't say anything, so I did.
"You, you know what's wrong with me and you didn't tell me? How can you keep that from me?" He shook his head and grabbed my arm in a soothing manner.
"I've kept it from you," He said softly. "Because, I know it's gonna be hard for you to hear." I accepted that answer and sat back.
"Okay," I nodded. "But I have to know" He nodded and looked down. I could tell he didn't want to tell me, I could tell he didn't want me to know. But that only worried me, and I began to cry.
"Please Rai," I said in a soft voice. "Please tell me what's going on with me." He nodded once more and looked back up at me. His eyes were flooded with fear and worry.
"You," He sighed, I could tell it was hard for him. "You've lost your courage." My heart stopped. I lost my courage? I felt like I was going to die. I was known as the Xiaolin Warrior with the most courage, I worked hard for that title! How could I lose my courage? How could I lose all that I was known for? What happened to me? What was happening to me? I wanted to scream all that out at Rai, but I couldn't All I could do was sit there and cry. Raimundo moved closer to me and pulled me in. I placed my head on his shoulder and allowed him to run his hand down through my hair as I cried. I needed his comfort; I needed all of the comfort he could offer me.
"I'm sorry." He said into my hair. "I'm so sorry." I pulled back and looked at him. I had to ask.
"How?" Raimundo shrugged.
"I don't know how." I nodded and slowly stood up. Without saying anything else I turned around and walked out of the room. I didn't want him to see me like that anymore, I couldn't take the thought. I walked back to the cubicle where I slept and just sat there silently.
It had been hours and I still sat in that cubicle. I couldn't do anything; I could barely even stay with my own thoughts. My head hurt, I confused myself with every thought. It was to the point where I just couldn't think anymore. I didn't know what I was going to do. Nothing made sense anymore, not even the very air I breathed. I was breaking and I didn't know how to fix it. I grabbed a knife that I had left in my room the last time I had lunch, and I don't know why but I put it up to my wrist. I couldn't make sense of anything anymore, and just maybe this was the last solution. I pressed the knife down just until I could see my blood. It hurt, but I didn't care too much. I pressed down harder a sob erupting from me. And just at the moment that I was ready to cut deep Raimundo walked into my cubicle.
"Kimiko!" His voice was sharp and he was quick to pull the knife away from me. "What are doing?" He yelled out in shock.
"I don't know." I cried. "But, I can't take it! I just can't take it anymore!" Raimundo knelt down beside me and wrapped an arm around me. With his free hand he picked up and band-aid that was on my dresser. Then very carefully, he applied it to my wrist and left a soft kiss on it. I sighed and fell into his arms, the tears running down my cheeks.
"Just two weeks ago," I said softly. "I was happy. I wanna go back to that."
"I know you do." Rai said. "We all want to." And that was all he said. For the next few moments we just sat together, both quiet and lost in our own thoughts.
After dinner that night, I sat cross-legged on my mat feeling numb and praying for sleep to come. I didn't want anything else, I was just too depressed. I didn't understand how I could go from being the happiest in my life just two weeks ago, to this… It didn't make any sense, and I didn't want it anymore.
My thoughts began drifting away and I could soon feel sleep falling over me.
I stood in the middle of a battle zone looking around at all of the dead bodies around me. I had done things that I was not proud of. I did horrible things, things I never could have imagined I would do. I felt so different. I thought differently, I acted differently, I even moved differently. Every second of every day, I tried to sort myself out, but it was like I couldn't even hear myself think.
"Hello." A voice broke through my thoughts "I have been watching you dear," That thought made me shiver. And I turned around, but it was as if no one was there.
"I could really use someone of your power." The voice said to me.
"Use me?" I found myself saying.
"You would be very happy on the Haylin team." Haylin team… My thoughts tried to wrap themselves around the words, but I couldn't seem to comprehend them. What was this voice trying to tell me? Suddenly a rush of anger boiled up within me and I screamed out.
"I hate you!"
Moments later I found myself standing in the hallway staring at my dad. Only it wasn't really my dad. I couldn't explain it; it was almost as if I was a totally different person.
"I can't believe you." I heard myself saying as I glared at him, tears spilling from my eyes. "I just don't know who you are anymore." My dad seemed appalled at that statement.
"I am your daddy." I shook my head angrily. I couldn't believe what he was telling me, this man could not be my dad. It seemed so un-real.
"No you're not," I said. "You're a monster. I know what you've done!"
"What do you mean?" Then, in that one moment, my mind flooded with thousands of thoughts as I tried to make this moment out. I couldn't concentrate on one thing; I didn't know what was wrong with me. I felt so… different.
"What have you done to me?" I screamed at the man that gave me life. "I shouldn't be here!" My dad just gave me a strange look and I shook my head trying to order out my thoughts. "You turned me into a killer!" Dad shook his head and tried to reach out for me.
"You do not understand." I jerked away from his touch and screamed in his face.
"No, you don't understand! I've never known the feeling of hurting somebody. But now I know it too well! I have the blood of so many people on my hands!"
"What are you trying to say?" I let out a sob. What was I trying to say?
"Why couldn't you just protect us?" Now I was crying, finally giving free leeway to my emotions. "Why couldn't you just keep that monster away from us?"
"I tried." Dad said too sincerely.
"No!" I screamed. "You didn't try, and now you're on the same side as him." Dad stepped back, but I continued, I had too many emotions ready to be set free.
"I have been through more pain in the past two months than you have felt in your whole life!"
"Don't you dare tell me what I have been through!" My daddy screamed. The he did a very startling thing, he slapped me. My daddy slapped me. I drew my head back to look at him, the tears streaming down my stinging cheek.
"Oh no, baby." My dad seemed as surprised as I was, but I would not let him apologize. I gave way to my sobs and ran back to my room. What was going on with me? I was feeling emotions that weren't my own. I was thinking thoughts that belonged to someone else. I couldn't explain it, and I didn't want it. I just wanted to know what was wrong with me. I just wanted to feel like myself again. I slipped onto my floor and just cried…
Thanks for reading! Did you like it? I would like to hear from you, I love reviews! And just remember, if you don't review I won't update, cause then I will think you don't wanna see more… So if you wanna see more, you have to review, k?