Dorian

It was late and I knew I should try to get some sleep, but like usual it was alluding me. But, it wasn't because of the unlived feeling of my home this time. No, this time it was the feeling of too many people living around me. Not that I enjoyed feeling so uncomfortable knowing that the royal murderer could hear everything in my head. She bugged me. The way she pretends to be some kind of martyr when really she's just like the people who controlled me. Contrary to belief I am not brainwashed or blind to my situation. No. What ran me now was fear.

Living with the Strigoi for so long fear and darkness were really the only two emotions I had. Not that I mind. I have seen the way emotions affect others. How it turns them into idiots. I do wish the Strigoi would have just kept me for themselves though. With them I knew what was expected of me and what would happen if I did not comply. I knew how they behaved and always expected their commands before they gave it. Here...amongst political junkies things were different. I didn't trust any of them. Each one of them had their own secret agenda.

I veered my thoughts away, remembering to throw a Spirit wall between my mind and my bondmate's. I wouldn't let that bitch get information out of my head without even attempting to fight. I may be helping to fight the same cause, but I didn't do things willingly if I didn't want to. Not that the idiots who had be raised knew that. They simply stole my life away with no explanation and didn't look my way until they needed me.

The only true escape I had from the madness of my life was Dream Walking. I let my magic go. I could feel the only joy in my life seeping through my veins. I did not particularly enjoy dream walking. People dreamed of the most idiotic things. But, it was an escape. A moment to myself where I was not Dorian Ivashkov. Or Dorian Dashkov. I was simply Dorian. As I let the world slip away the Other World built around me. I looked around, surprised where I found myself. The royal banquet hall.

There they sat, the queen and the rest of her horde. But, who's dream was this? I looked around me, looking for the source. I sensed her before she entered. She was scared. I watched, amused, taking a seat at the banquet table. She walked around and all eyes shot to her. She looked around frightened. I could see her emotions written on her face as she looked around at the disapproving faces. She walked forward, then stopped.

"Why are you here?" she asked, looking at me.

"I don't know, Princess, why don't you tell me." I replied, smirking, "This is your dream after all."

She blinked, confused. For a girl who was bonded to my brother she was quite slow in realizing that this was a Spirit Dream. She looked away and took her seat, the troubled look on her face not going away. I watched the scene unfold around me. The awkwardness between the queen and her sister was very interesting, but what I did not realize until a few minutes had passed was this was a memory. I could tell now, by how the dream was set up. How it all made sense and did not have nonsense thrown around it. I didn't know if this scene was important, but I focused on it nonetheless. The scene could tell me many things about the Princess and even the queen. A weakness I did not know.

Adrian spoke to the Princess quite often, easing her. A friendship. Or maybe something else. How quaint. My brother enjoyed them young, didn't he? But, I did notice how often his eyes went to the queen's personal guard, Rose Hathaway. What was the story behind that, I wonder. I smirked to myself as I continued to watch.

"Lissa, I don't mean any disrespect, but...but..." Jill said, gnawing at her lip, "I..."

Rose gave her a sympathetic smile and nodded for her to continue. Jill took a deep breath and spoke.

"I don't want special treatment. I want to go back to Saint Vlads and just be Jill Mastrano."

Lissa looked at her sadly, but it was Christian who brought her back to reality.

"Jill, as much as you want things to go back to what they were before they aren't going to. You're Jillian Dragomir, now. The only relative of the queen. The only princess of the Dragomir family. Nothing will ever be the same again. Stop looking back because what you want isn't going to happen."

"As much as I hate to say it, Jailbait, Christian's right," Adrian said gently, "Things can't be the same. No matter what."

"I'm sorry, Jill," Lissa said quietly, "But, this is the way things have to be."

"I'll be behind wards. And I'll have guardians everywhere. I don't see the danger."

"With Natasha Ozera on the loose it is not safe for you." Evette Ozera said, diplomatically.

"This isn't fair!" Jill yelled, "Why don't I get a say in any of this!? I came here like you wanted! I became a princess so you could become queen! Why can't I just go back to school? It's the only thing I've asked for! I didn't want any of this!"

"You sound like a child," one of the council members mumbled.

"Newsflash I am a child!" she barked back.

"Jill, calm down," Rose called out, "We know you didn't ask..."

Jill got up ready to stalk out. I didn't realize that the princess was a spoiled, bratty teenager. But, the scene changed quickly, pulling me from my musing. Windows shattered and guns began going off. The room erupted in chaos. And I was thrilled by it. Utter perfect chaos. The queen was hidden behind a group of dhampirs, warding away those who attempted to harm her. Other dhampirs moved to guard the council members and most went to obtain the attackers. But, then the scene centered. I walked forward watching as a knife was plunged into the princess's chest. The man was tackled to the ground and arrested, but everyone's gaze was on the bleeding chest of a green-eyed Moroi. Blood was pouring from her mouth and my breath caught. Usually I enjoyed the kill, Was thrilled by it. Almost lusted for it the way Strigoi did. But, this time...this was nothing more than pure shock.

I watched my brother come forward and heal her. Restore her. That was what they had. A bondship.

The scene changed and the room was dark, save for the young Moroi princess hovering over a machine. She looked up at me and frowned.

"You should leave," she said quietly.

I snorted, "Afraid?"

"There's something wrong with you," she whispered, her eyes trailing me.

"It's because I'm a living Strigoi," I replied cheerfully.

And that's when the dream fell apart. I stared up at the ceiling feeling more emotion than I had my entire life. Who are you, Jillian Dragomir? And why dio my master's want you so badly?

Jillian

I shot up in bed, my hand on my beating heart. I looked around, fearing for my life, but seeing Eddie standing by the door relaxed me. Angelina hadn't been able to come here with us because of her heritage and lack of real training and honestly, I was happy. I didn't care for her. She was...a bitch.

"Are you okay?" Eddie asked, keeping his distance. He'd been doing that since we got back from Palm Springs. And honestly? It made me sad. Was there something wrong with me? I shook my head.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about it. Bad dream," I replied quietly rising from my bed and slipping into the bathroom.

I stared at my reflection, barely recognizing the person in the mirror. I was fifteen and I was beginning to look more like my mother. I was curvier. My hair was tamer. My eyes even looked brighter. I was beginning to gain male attention, but still Eddie never seemed to see me as anything more than his charge. We'd flirted a few times, but that was before Angelina showed up. She looked a lot more like a woman than I did and she had the flirting thing down. So it was easy to see why he saw me as a child again.

I shook my head. Who was I kidding myself? Who wanted me? I am an underrated, illegitimate royal, made legitimate on a technicality with a psychotic best friend who didn't care for one minute if his vices were affecting me. No...that wasn't fair. Adrian did care, he just didn't think he could change. And aside from attempting to kill me there was no way to sever the bond between us. It was just something we had to live with. Even if I did have a small drinking problem thanks to it. Not that anyone knew about that.

I had the nightmare again, but this time Adrian's brother was in it. It was a nightmare this time, not just a memory. And I didn't like the feeling I was getting every time I thought about what he'd said at the end of the dream. It's because I'm a living Strigoi. What did that mean? And was this a sign that something bad was about to happen? No, Jill, stop freaking yourself out. In a week you'll be back in boring old Palm Spring waiting like Rapunzel to be let free of your tower.

I splashed water on my face and walked back to my bed. But, even there, sleep evaded me.