For the next few days, Harry and Dougie avoided each other like wildfire. At the bands house, they kept to their respected rooms. At interviews, Harry sat one end of the sofa and Dougie on the other. Danny and Tom had no idea what was going on, they just believed that they had an argument of some sort and would fix itself soon enough.

Dougie's POV:

Friday had finally rolled around, meaning that I had the house all to myself whilst the guys went out partying. It meant that finally I could walk around the house, without having the constant fear that I might bump into Harry. I hate being shut up in my room without any company. Often, I hear Harry stop outside my room, like he was hesitating about whether he should enter or not. And every time he stops, I'd silently pray he will enter, but my prayers are never answered. Harry would always trudge off to his room, and I had to hold back silent tears.

Having time away from everyone and everything gave me time to think about things thoroughly. Whilst I began to think that Friday evening, I decided to bust out some music to help me. Searching through my huge collection of Blink 182 cds and various Mcfly albums, I came across a cd case containing a disc and nothing else. Picking it up, I suddenly remember that a fan gave it to me whilst on tour. She had explained it was a playlist of all the songs that had helped her during hard times in her life, so it only seemed right that I use it now.

Placing it in the cd slot of my player, I press play and collapse on my bed. A familiar tune began to ring out and I bit down on my bottom lip to stop tears from falling.

"Some people hide their every desire,

But we are the lovers,

If you don't believe me,

Then just look into my eyes,

Cause the heart never lies"

A lump caught in my throat. Those few words met the current situation so perfectly. It can't have been fate, it was meant to happen. I was hiding my desire for Harry. My heart beats so fast when ever hes near, every touch electric, every conversation I have to force the words out my mouth like they've been super glued in. Your eyes when you look at me in interviews, gigs, wherever. They always shine so bright and are full of life. Could I truly love my best friend and could he ever love me back? That thought was cut short as the song changed, and I knew the answer.

"If you listen to the things that your friends say you're gonna be lonely,

How could you treat my like that when I give my all to you,

Cause I haven't been messing around,

I would never go out,

And do the things you don't want me to do,

Because I can tell right now that you'll never find the evidence on me,

And that's the truth"

The last line stuck in my head like a broken record. It's the truth. I love my best friend and there's nothing I can do about it. But I refuse to keep it a secret from him. I just can't keep anything from him. I have to find him and tell him. Now...

Harry's POV

Dougie's been avoiding me all week, so I decided two can play at that game. But it's been so hard not to run into his room, hug him and tell him to stop acting like a fool. More and more indecent images have appeared in my head since the shower incident and all have revolved around him. All this time I've been thinking, that same question had popped into my head. Do I really love my best friend? Am I even gay? I guess I must be at least bi, but whether I'm fully gay or not is still a mystery.

A knock on my door pulls me out of my deep thoughts, and I grumble a "Come in". Danny and Tom open the door, dressed in their 'Pulling' gear meaning that they were going pubbing and clubbing.

"You coming Mr. Judd?" Danny asked, his Bolton accent thicker than ever.

"Nah, I'll give this one a miss mate. Not feeling to great" I lied. I just wanted time to think.

"Alright mate, take it easy" Tom replied before shutting my door, and exiting the house for a long night of girls and drinking.

As soon as the door closed, my thoughts instantly turned to the situation at hand. First things first, am I gay or what? I decide the best way to check is to watch some gay porn. Just searching the words into Google already made me feel slightly uneasy. Clicking on the first link, I begin to watch the video. After 5 minutes or so, I knew I was gay. Not only my head said I was, but so did my heart. I had gained a painful erection from watching the video and decided to take care of the problem. But instead of imagining the actors, I imagined me and Dougie. That's when my second question was answered. I was infact in love with my best friend. But there was no way in hell I could tell him. He'd never speak to me again. It was bad enough not talking to him for 3 days let alone the rest of my life. Deciding quickly, I chose to keep my feelings bottled up for only me to know about. If anyone were to find out, I could lose him, and I just can't let that happen. Rising from my bed, I do up my jeans and head towards the door. Opening it, I find a nervous Dougie on the other side. He looks up, his eyes are red meaning he'd been crying. Before I could get a word out, he placed his index finger to my lips, before leaning in and replacing his finger with his own set of soft lips.

Dougie's POV

A million feelings were running through my mind right now, but one stood out most of all. Why wasn't he moving away? I pulled out from the kiss, before realisation hit me hard. I had just kissed him, without even thinking it through. I looked into Harry's eyes and found nothing, like he'd built up a barrier that I just couldn't see through. He didn't move, like he was mulling things over. I didn't want to wait for the rejection.

"I'm so sorry." I said before running back into my room and locking the door. Placing my back against the hard wood, I slide down before my butt hits the floor and tears that I'd been holding in for far too long began to stream down my face. Huddling my knees close to my chest, I realise I've just destroyed and ruined every chance I ever had with him. All because of stupid impulses.

Walking over to my bed, I strip down to my boxers before entering the warmth of the duvet. Tears are still evidently leaking from my eyes and I realised tonight was going to be a long one. Looking towards the door, I whisper "I love you Harry" before trying my hardest to not cry myself to sleep.

Harry's POV

Holding my ear very close to the door, I heard the tiniest whisper come from Dougie's lips. "I love you Harry". My body began to shake as the emotion roared within me. Suddenly one lonesome tear descended down my cheek before it landed on my hand, which was pressed lightly on his door. I suddenly began feeling guilty, upset, angry, lonely and in love all at the same time. I just wanted to burst through the door and pull Dougie into my arms and never let go.

A little sob caught my attention which truly finished me off. I had made him cry himself to sleep. If only I had reacted to that kiss. It was amazing and I felt every one of Dougie's emotions for me. It was such a shock and I just froze, not knowing what to do. When he had re-entered his room, I instantly felt guilty for not saying something or kissing back and then regret hit me just as hard. Looking towards the door, I whisper "I love you too Dougie, always have. Always will. And one day I will be able to tell you without any fears or worries." And with that, I went back into my room, knowing I wasn't the only one crying myself to sleep that night.