When he woke in the morning, he was wrapped in a red cloak and hood. Neither the guide nor Genma could explain where it had come from.
He'd burned it immediately.
Three days later, only a day after they left the Amazon village, he woke in the campsite with the same cloak wrapped around him. He burned it again.
Then two days later, every morning for a week, he woke wrapped in the cloak. He burned it every time. Then they reached the coast and stowed away in a ship for a few days to get back to Japan. The first morning after their arrival, he woke with a hooded red leather trenchcoat covering him in place of a blanket. He gave up and slipped it on over his clothes.
It was waterproof. That was nice. Kept the pouring rain off, for one. Pity that Genma wasn't smart enough to get an umbrella or something... wet panda fur smelled like week old dung.
xxx
"He's coming! Oh happy day!"
Seems things still haven't been explained to Soun yet.
"What? FIANCE?"
And he's just making things worse... lets skip ahead a little... doop-de-doo.... Ah, here we go.
"That's fascinating Saotome. Jusenkyo... the pools of sorrow. It's incredible to see. And your son is cursed as well?"
Soun tossed a cup of drinking water at Ranma's head. Ranma didn't even blink as Genma leapt in the way, catching the water and transforming into a panda in mid air.
"Growf." 'No need for that, old friend. My son is... touchy... about his curse.'
"I see... Still, no real trouble. These are my daughters... Kasumi, age nineteen..."
'Soun?'
"Nabiki, age seventeen..."
'Old buddy, are you paying attention to me?'
"And Akane, age sixteen. Choose the one you want, and she will be your... bride? Er... Saotome?"
Genma and son answered as one.
"What the hell are you talking about?"
'What are you talking about, Soun?'
Akane, about to do something rash, paused. The younger Saotome.... what she could see of his face seemed honestly confused. And while she wasn't yet skilled at making out the differences in the facial expressions of pandas, his father seemed puzzled as well.
"Why... the agreement, Saotome! You remember, don't you? To unite the schools through the marriage of our children?"
Genma frowned and poured some hot water over himself as he began digging through his pack. After a moment, he withdrew a yellowed piece of paper and brought all of his surprisingly considerable acting skills to the fore. His brow furrowed as he reread the contract.
"Soun... not once in our contract is a union of marriage specified. Also... the details of that night of celebration are somewhat hazy, I'll admit, but I don't recall any mention of marriage then either..."
"Well how would you join the schools otherwise?"
"The traditional way! I teach my boy everything I know and then some... you teach one of your daughters everything you know and then some... and then the two train each other!"
Nabiki had long since snagged the contract and begun looking it over as Kasumi sipped at tea and Akane stared at the intensifying argument.
"He's right you know. Nothing about marriage ever comes up in this. Theres a lot about 'Joining the schools', some drivel about 'The hated Grandmaster, finally sealed away for the good of the world' and something about 'The two, bound as brothers through shared torments', but nothing about marriage ever comes up."
"Then... this is all just a big misunderstanding?"
"Oh my... the tea is gone. Excuse me."
The argument seemed to be at the point where it would come to blows, but Soun suddenly started bawling at the top of his lungs and tackle-hugged his old friend, apologizing deeply and sincerely for his mistaken assumptions. In the deluge of tears, Genma shifted to a panda again.
"Well that's settled, and everythings done, so..."
"Not quite." Ranma interrupted, standing up slowly. "There's still one more thing to deal with. Now... which of you is the heir to the Tendo Ryu?"
He snorted and grinned.
"Whichever it is, meet me in the Dojo. Gotta say I'm impressed though... it takes a really high-class martial artist to conceal their presence to the point that you can't tell them from your average guy off the street. This might be fun..."
Akane stared for a moment as he left, then started scowling as what appeared to be red flame began crackling around her.
"Why that... that... did he call me weak? I'll KILL him!"
xxx
Five minutes later Akane had switched out her clothes for a gi, and was sneering at her opponent, who hadn't bothered. This would be over in no time.
Little did she know that Ranma was thinking the same thing about her.
"Now Ranma, this is for the union of the schools, so don't toy with her! This isn't playtime! Also, this is just a friendly sparring match, to test her level relative to yours, so no Forbidden techniques-"
"-no crippling moves, no maiming strikes, no breaking bones, and no 'fighting dirty'. I get it... you run through this every time."
"That's because I can never tell if you need it or not! That curse is fiddling with your self-control. Remember in China?"
"I was having a bad day. And to be fair, she did try to stab me in my sleep."
"You still went overboard! All you had to do was knock that Shampoo girl out, and we could have gotten away again, just like all the other times before. Instead, you-"
"I told you... I was having a bad day. I could have just shot her."
"And that's another thing... no guns. I can't imagine why you even have such things."
"Ace in the hole. Some of the things I remember Riding Hood hunting had acidic blood, or were poisonous to the touch. Now that I look like her part of the time, there's no guarantees that something with a grudge won't hunt me down, and I don't feel like watching my arm sizzle off."
Genma just grunted... the boy had a point. People had long memories... monsters probably did too.
"Still-"
"I get it, I get it. Don't worry, she won't end up in the hospital. I'll just humiliate her instead."
Genma frowned, but that was really the best he could do.
"Ready.... Fight!"
The two combatants stared at each other for a moment. Akane had fallen into her traditional stance, and Ranma still hadn't removed his hands from his pockets. Then he broke the silence.
"Interesting... a few minor variations to a basic Kempo stance. You sacrifice a little defense in the front to increase defense on the sides and rear and maximize the power you can put into your attacks. And you chose this stance automatically, out of reflex. Not the best for one on one combat... but against a large group of less skilled enemies? It's perfect, in that regard. Tell me... do you fight off mobs often?"
Akane flinched as if struck at the accuracy of his description and both of Nabiki's eyebrows rose. He could tell all that at a glance?
"The problem though, is that while such a stance is useful against multiple, weaker opponents... against a single, stronger one, or even one that is just equal to your level, it falls woefully behind."
"Sh-Shut up! I'm the best martial artist in Nerima!"
Ranma nodded.
"Good thing to know that you have confidence in yourself... but I'm not from Nerima. I'm an unknown quantity. You might be better than me... or you might not. Overconfidence will be your downfall."
"Enough talk, time to fight! Kyaaa!"
Akane rushed forward in a full frontal attack, rattled enough to drop all semblance of defence in favor of offense. Ranma sighed and stepped to the side, extending one foot. Akane tripped over it and went flying into the wall.
"That... no fair! I wasn't ready!"
"Then you should wait to attack until you are ready. Patience, girl. We've got all day."
"I'll show you!"
Whack!
Akane had run straight into Ranma's fist, and stumbled backwards with the beginning of a nosebleed.
"My arms and legs are longer than yours. Weave around my defense, don't try to crash through it."
"Why you...!"
Ranma caught her clumsy punch and flipped her over to crash into the floor.
"Control your outbursts... use no more force than is neccessary. Force can be redirected and used against you, turning you into your own greatest enemy. This is all groundwork you should have covered years ago. Are you sure you're the Tendo heir?"
Akane snarled as she got up from the ground, wobbling slightly.
"You know, you should just stay down. I've already learned everything about your fighting style that there is to know, unless you've been holding back something special. No need to continue this farce."
"I won't lose to you!"
"You already have."
"DIE!"
Akane charged forward like a rampaging bull. Ranma sighed and seemed to drift forward like a ghost to meet her. His speed was revealed as her strike passed through an afterimage and he continued to drift past her.
She couldn't move... all her muscles had locked up.
"I just struck no less than thirty-seven of your muscle paralysis points. It'll wear off in about an hour. Until then, just sit tight and let the adults talk business."
"Um.... Winner, Ranma Saotome."
Akane fumed but couldn't say anything, as her mouth was locked shut. That... that cheater!
"I must say Tendo... I'm a little dissappointed in the quality of your student."
"I apologize old friend. Due to my, ah, misunderstanding of the details of the union between our schools, I may not have trained her as intensively as I should have. It is entirely my fault..."
"No no, old friend. This... er... problem is not insurmountable. I'm sure with a little more intensive training, your girl will easily be able to match my son."
Privately, Soun doubted it. The boy already displayed skill outpacing him at his best... and he'd been getting slowly out of shape ever since the master had been sealed away. He hadn't even taught since his wife had died.... though it wasn't completely from lack of trying. He'd just given up after a while.
"Are you... sure that the schools cannot be joined through marriage."
"Positive. I'm sorry Tendo.... even if it were possible, the boy has... prior arrangements. My hands are tied."
"This is the first I heard of this, Pops."
"And just how would I have brought it up? Oh, yes, 'Loosen your guard, put a little more power in those strikes, and by the way boy, I've been meaning to tell you that you've been engaged since before you were born'. There was just no real opportunity."
"Huh... guess that makes sense."
"In any case, Tendo... Might I prevail upon you for a room for a night or two? Just until we find an apartment, of course."
xxx
Ranma didn't like the Tendo place much. The patriarch, Soun, broke into crying fits at apparent random and when he did he released enough tears to activate Genma's curse, which meant that it could activate his. That was a big black mark against him. The eldest daughter seemed to have retreated from reality the moment the curse was revealed, the middle daughter kept sending calculating looks his way that sent eerie chills down his spine, and the youngest was quite frankly borderline psychotic.
The sudden revelation his father had let slip about 'prior arrangements' had fouled his mood as well, and the fact that they'd bundled the two of them into the same room for the night had only worsened things. Ever since the curse, he'd tried to make sure that there was a certain amount of distance between their sleeping spaces, as there was a tendency for at least one of them to get soaked in the night and-
The door creaked as it slowly slid open, distracting him as he cracked an eyelid to check... the middle daughter. And she had....
Nabiki hefted the bucket of water with a smirk.
"Well now, Ranma-kun... let's see what that curse that you're so touchy about is. Just a little cold water, and-"
Ranma sat up in bed and hurled a handful of throwing knives at the bucket, slashing it open in a half dozen places and spilling the water all over the floor, before slumping back to the ground- apparently without having woken up.
"..... Or, you know, I could leave our guests their privacy." Nabiki mumbled, apparently shaken, before stepping back and sliding the door closed. Ranma smirked and allowed himself to drift off to slumber.
The next morning, Genma had yet another irritating announcement.
"School? Why do I have to go to-"
"Everyone has to go to school boy. You have to get an education sometime."
"I don't need an education! In case you didn't notice..." Ranma paused and glanced around for listeners before continuing. "Little Red had college degrees... multiple. And guess whose memories are stuffed into my brain."
Genma hesitated as he considered that, then shook his head.
"Well... you'll have no trouble making top of your class then. Besides, now that we aren't moving around any more we have truant officers and law enforcement to worry about."
"Oh... point to you. I guess I really don't have much of a choice then."
Genma nodded, once more marveling at how the curse had made his son both more and less rational at the same time.
"It's the same one that Soun's younger daughters attend. One of them will show you the way. Besides that..." Genma took his turn checking for eavesdroppers. "You remember what the guide said about the curse. When was the last time yours activated? If you don't change and spend some time in your other form soon..."
"I know, I know. Sheesh. I was going to do it today... but it looks like I'll have to put it off until after classes."
"Will you be back in time for dinner?"
"Hmm... difficult to say. Depends on how far I have to go to find a street fight that lets the competitors make bets. Since I assume that I'm going to be the one paying for the apartment you mentioned looking for the other day?"
Genma nodded and, in an unprecedented show of generosity, handed Ranma a thousand-yen bill.
"Keep that in reserve for food, and you can pay me back after you win your match."
Ranma nodded and tucked it away before looking out the window and flipping up his hood.
"But it looks like rain today. Seems like I'll have to be extra careful-"
"Saotome! I need to get going, so either come now, or wait for Akane. She'll walk you to school."
"'Walk me to'? I'm not some little kid, y'know. Just give me the adress and I can get there fine. Besides... I just plain don't like your sister that much, Nabiki."
"Oh? Most of the boys at school are hopelessly obsessed over her."
Ranma snorted as he rose.
"Can't imagine why. She's spoiled, violent, not anywhere near as dedicated to the martial arts as she likes to pretend, and while she's cute, she's nowhere near attractive enough to outweigh her faults."
"Wow... blunt. And harsh. A first, in many ways."
Genma hurled a pack to Ranma, who caught it easily.
"So, where is this school, then?"
xxx
"Geeze... it's so dusty in here. Why are we doing this again, Prince?"
"Hmph. Like I said before, it came to me the other day. As king of the underworld, the Overlord is an extremely diplomatic figure, who must maintain ties with every part of their Makai. As such, it's entirely possible that mairrages will be arranged to ensure cordial diplomatic relations. That's why we're here... to check and see if the old man made any deals like that about me before he died!"
"Yeah, I know that! What I meant was, why are 'we' doing this, instead of making the servants deal with it?"
"Hah! Mere servants cannot be trusted to deal with these matters correctly... and they can't keep their mouths shut for anything. Let's see... disregard anything more than half a century old... he would definitely have told me about it. The most recent files are in this drawer, so... Hmm. Drivel, drivel, little treaty, pointless political chatter... blah, freaking blah... Oh, there's an arranged marriage for you, Etna. More treaties... whew, I'm in the clear."
"Wait... what was that?"
"The treaties?"
"No, you moron of a prince! Before that!"
"Hm... oh yeah. Looks like your engaged to some mortal... paper's really recent. Looks like Pops had it drawn up just a few days before he croaked."
"Oh my, an arranged marriage! Good luck miss Etna, and I hope you grow to love your new husband!"
"Shut up! When the hell did you even get here anyway?"
"Hmm... Well as the Overlord, I definitely have to uphold my father's treaties and political arrangements. As such, I fully support you in your new relationship."
"She... you..." Etna growled and clutched at her spear. "Tch. This guy better be damn cute."
xxx
"Ah... so she does fight off mobs often. I'd wondered."
"Every morning before school. Kuno-sempai set it up, claimed that if they beat her that they'd win a date... and the average Furinkan guy was just dim enough that they believed him. It's annoying, and none of them really stand a chance. At least in the beginning people would bet whether or not she could win, and who might beat her, but now it's gotten to the point that they only bet on how many seconds it'll take her to wipe the floor with them."
"Ha... making money off of your sister's misfortune." Ranma smirked. "You're a.... cold hearted bitch. Still... I suppose I owe your family a favor, for letting us stay at your dojo. Tell me... what are the odds of her being late for class?"
"Pretty long, something like 50 to one. She's not been late yet once. Wait..."
"Put me down for a thousand." He said, flipping the note to her. "By the way, I might be late for first period."
By the time Nabiki mentally calculated that despite the payout she'd have to give Ranma, she'd come out well ahead, he'd already made his exit to wait on top of the clock tower and watch for Akane's arrival. She didn't take long, and began to tear through the crowd like a mecanical reaper through a field of wheat, chanting something about how much she hated boys. He waited for her to finish before dropping down from the tower and cratering the steps into the school.
"Eh... Ranma, you?"
"You forgot already, Akane-kun? As per our familial agreement... I'm your sensei in the martial arts now. You will adress me as 'Sensei' during our lessons."
"What lessons? I'm just trying to get to class, you-!"
"Opening!"
Akane only barely dodged Ranma's attack by dropping to the ground and then rolling to the side do dodge his brutal follow-up.
"A lesson can come at any time or place, as can an attack! Having all your battles at the same time every day... it's too predictable, and you get used to the routine. But that's neither here nor there. If class is that important to you, you'll just have to get past me quickly! Better hurry though, the clock is ticking."
"Fine! I'll end this with one-"
Ranma kicked her in the face as she rushed forward blindly.
"You seem to have a real problem with your short term memory. If that tactic didn't work the first time, what would make you think that-"
"Hold, varlet!" a newcomer introduced himself, along with a swipe of his bokken. Ranma caught him by the arm and negligently hurled him at Akane, who swatted him out of the way with a backhand, directly into the school wall.
"Distractions to my lessons will not be tolerated! Now Akane, attack from whatever direction you please, and allow me to educate you on the flaws in your technique."
Above, the students were awestruck as they hung out the window.
"That guy... he took out Kuno like it was nothing."
"So strong..."
"Didn't he say that he was Akane's sensei?"
"Wow... Akane's already so strong. After being instructed by this guy, what will she...?"
"Noo!" The still-concsious members of the horde howled, as one.
"I'm gonna be late for class, you jerk!"
Ranma launched a kick at Akane's head.
"What part of 'Adress me as 'Sensei' during our lessons' fails to sink in, my impudent student?"
"I.... Will... NEVER call you sensei!" Akane proclaimed, dramatic announcement accompanied by the ringing of the school bell. "Now get out of my way before I'm late!"
Ranma smirked and blurred, then turned and walked into the school as Akane slowly toppled over.
"And so, our lesson comes to an end."
xxx
A.N.
Ha, not a dead-fic!
And so, the plot begins to progress.