Everybody ignored him from then on. They didn't talk more than necessary or spent more time together then absolutely necessary.
He lost his friends, Natasha and Nick, in addition to his lover but it was for the best.
Friends meant the possibility to get hurt, he could lose one of them and that was something he wanted to avoid.
He drove them away before they could turn their backs on him or die and he pushed the Avengers away before they got too close.
Who am I kidding I do like them even when they get on my nerves, Clint sat on a chair close to the pool.
The last mission almost ended badly for Cap and Clint had felt something like fright at the moment the tall man hit the ground. Luckily he was just unconscious.
They all went out to a bar to celebrate their victory, he wasn't invited.
It was strange how hard it was to keep these people out of his heart. They were friendly, underneath their rough behavior and jokes. They believe in a better world and in their part on the way to a better future. Like Phil did but it hurt less to think about it.
It hurt less to look at Captain America or Stark.
"Fury called, he's coming over in about 30 minutes," Bruce informed him dryly, he nodded.
They all gathered in the backyard as they heard a helicopter.
Nick got out of the helicopter and ran in their direction, followed by three more man.
Clint stared at them, he couldn't breathe or think just stare. It wasn't possible.
"I brought a little present along," the dark man smiled as Phil approached.
He was instantly greeted with hugs and questions, they couldn't believe he was real.
"We thought you're dead," Natasha choked out.
"We had a mole, and I had to fake my own death to bring the investigation along. We figured out who sold us out more than once," he sounded apologetic.
"I'm so glad you are not dead." Steve hugged him again, he couldn't describe how happy he was.
"It was a mean trick," Tony said his eyes suspiciously wet.
"I know," Phil said gently before he turned his whole attention to Clint. The archer still stared at him until the older man held his gaze. His body moved on his own accord, he walked to Phil and punched him in the face before he turned around to leave. Cap put his arms around the archer before he got the chance to make two steps.
"Let go off me," Clint hissed but Steve did not. "How dare you?" Cap hissed in anger.
"Clint." Phil tried to reach him, wiping blood from his split lip.
"No, no," he raged and Cap had to tighten his hold on Barton to prevent him from attacking their friend. "Slow down Barton, or I have to hurt you."
"Please, Clint listen."
"I SAID NO," he struggled against Cap's grip he wanted to leave, to run as far as he could.
"Clint, listen to me."
"No, no," he whispered, giving up his struggle. Steve loosened his hold and Clint used the chance to elbow him in the rib before he escaped.
"Agent Barton, stop," Phil yelled.
Clint didn't turn around. "Clinton wait," he froze.
He felt how all eyes were on him. "WHY?" he turned around. "I don't listen to your orders anymore!"
"Let me explain," Phil felt a stabbing pain in his heart.
"What is there to explain? You faked your death, letting us believe you're dead. WE BURIED YOUR FOR GOD'S SAKE AND YOU KNEW IT ALL ALONG," the last part was directed at Nick.
Tears found their way into Phil's eyes. "I'm SORRY."
"Yeah me too," tears slid down his too pale face.
"Don't run please," he gave Nick a curt nod before he walked over to Clint.
"Don't make such a ruckus, we all missed him and feel some kind of anger but you should be relieved," Tony spread his arms. The others nodded, except Natasha.
"YEAH?" he yelled at Tony, "but you're not the one married to him" Clint spat. He was greeted by stunned silence.
The words hit Phil hard. He knew the mission was harsh but he'd hoped their reunion would be less messy.
The older man approached him slowly, searching for signs he might run. "I can't put into words how sorry I am," he sniffed, reaching out for his partner.
Clint clenched his jaw, fighting against the sobs which desperately tried to escape. "You left," he whispered finally.
"I know," Coulson pulled his lover into a tight hug. "Hush my love," he stroke the back of Clint's head, placing butterfly kissed on his temple and cheek. "I'm so sorry."
Barton's knees gave out under him and Phil guided him to the ground. "Weep all you want. Don' be ashamed."
"They gave me your gun and your bloody shirt," he whispered against Phil's chest. "They told me you're gone. Suddenly, I was alone. No family, no home, no life and here you are."
"I had no choice," Phil swallowed hard. "The mole took many lives with his work. Someone had to do it and they approached me."
"Why did you say yes?" he knew the answer.
"Because I believed in the cause."
"Your beliefs," he laughed almost hysterically while he pushed Phil away. "I can't stand to be near Cap since your demise because of your beliefs. He and the Avengers represent everything you believe in, and they had to put me on the team I dreaded most. Your beliefs, got you almost killed during Loki's attack, they got you almost killed a week before we married, they got you almost killed as you tried to save my sorry ass from Deadpool."
"Calm down love," panic crept into Phil's heart.
"Nice to know where my place is," he wiped his tears angrily away. "I thought I meant something to you, you old fool. Why did I fall in love with you of all people?!"
"You don't mean it." Phil knew he deserved it but it pained him to hear it, "tell me you don't mean it."
"I know you love your job, and I know you dream of a better future and that's okay but I'm obviously not a part of it. I'm not part of your world. What am I Phil? Why did you marry me? Because you needed someone to fuck? Somebody who was always close enough and willing? Were you lonely? The love sick archer will do, right?"
"Don't be ridiculous," Coulson snapped, he felt sick and it was hard to breath. "All we have is real. I love you more than anything."
"I thought that too, and until twenty minutes ago I would have agreed but not anymore," he got up. "S.H.I.E.L.D. got plenty Agents without family, one of them could have done that."
There was nothing Phil could say, Clint was right. Of course he was right.
The last few months were hell for him and he couldn't imagine how it must have been for Clint. It must have been torture.
He thought Clint would understand why he did what he did and that they would be fine after a little fight but he did not estimate such a fallout.
"See." Clint turned around to leave, "there's nothing to deny," he left.
"You can blame the whole fiasco on me," Nick appeared behind his friend.
"Too late." Phil dug his finger into the dirt, "I lost him."
"Give him some time." Nick put a hand on his shoulder, "he has every right to be angry, what did you expect?"
"Not such a drama," he lowered his gaze. "You withheld information from me, Nick," his friend said Clint was sad but more or less fine but that was obvious a lie. The archer looked terrible.
"There was nothing you could have done."
::::::::::::::::
They spent the evening together in the living room. Clint wasn't there with them he had vanished shortly after their fight.
"He pushed you away?" Phil was surprised, Clint was normally good at it to twist people around his little finger.
"Yeah, isn't the same anymore." Natasha hugged her knees, "you took him with you, the day you died."
"It wasn't my intention," Phil rubbed his forehead. "I have no idea how to make it right."
"Show him how much you love him, that he's your number one priority." Cap said, he was angry at S.H.I.E.L.D. for hurting them and he was angry at them for treating Clint that way.
"You destroyed everything you worked so hard for to rebuild," Natasha interfered. "You know how scared he his."
Tony and Bruce looked confused. "He said he was alone," Cap said to no one in particular.
"He doesn't have a family. His father was a drunk and killed his mother and himself. They sent him and his brother to an orphanage because they hadn't relatives. After a few years of abuse they ran away. They found refuge in a fair. They took them in and trained them.
They betrayed Clint's trust and tried to kill him. His brother turned his back on him and vanished. He came back years later just to kill his little brother, Clint took his brother's life to save himself. He lived on the streets when we found him, he was a criminal." Phil remembered, "Nat, Nick and I are everything he has left and we worked very hard to get through his defense."
"He saved my life years ago," she smiled, "he's my hero. I think I reminded him of how his life had been and he made it his task to protect and train me."
"He's a good kid." Tony said out loud, "but his heart is full of anger. He reminds me of myself when I was younger."
"We should look for him, it's getting cold and it will start to rain pretty soon," Cap got up and grabbed his jacket, "we should split up. Phil, stays here in case he returns."
The Agent nodded, he told them a few places where Clint could hide before they went.
After a long time on the couch he needed something else to do so he decided to look for Clint's room. It was located near the living room, it was spacious enough for two people to live there.
What shocked him most was the emptiness of the room. Clint was not neat, his clothes lay around, books on almost every desk but that was Clint before he left.
The room he stood in was almost sterile.
He spotted a picture on the nightstand, the only evidence that someone lived in the room.
"Our wedding," Phil mumbled to himself as he took the picture into his hands. They were both smiling at the camera, wearing black suits and white dress shirts.
It had been funny to see Clint in a suit, he avoided to wear them every way possible but for their wedding he made an exception.
Clint let Natasha choose the suit and kept it hidden from Phil, the archer told him that he wasn't permitted to see the groom in his suit before the wedding.
Phil smiled at the memory and put the picture down. He looked into the dresser and took a look at the wardrobe.
One of his jumpers hung next to Clint's clothes and his favorite tie, the archer had called him stupid because he favored one black tie more than the other, even though they were all the same in his opinion. Truth was they were not, Clint gave him the tie this made a big difference.
A box at the bottom of the wardrobe caught his eye. He took it and went to the bed.
Phil held his breath as he opened the box and a wave of nausea rushed through his stomach.
The box contained the bloody shirt they left behind for the rescue team to find.
On top of the neatly folded shirt lay his gun, little trickles of his blood on the butt.
In addition to the shirt and gun, the box contained more photos, Phil's favorite book and his sunglasses.
Coulson buried his face in his hands. "What have I done," he finally understood the whole impact of the mission. "What have I done to you?"
:::::::::::::
"We can't find him," Cap informed the Agent.
"We searched everywhere but he vanished without a trace," Bruce crossed his arms in front of his chest.
"He isn't at your apartment or... grave," Natasha looked thoughtful, she couldn't shake of the feeling that she missed something.
"I know where he is," there was only one place left. Phil took his jacket and rushed out of the building.
"Good luck," Tony called after him before he demanded answers from Natasha.
Phil sighed with relief as he spotted his lover from afar, he could bite his behind for not thinking of it sooner.
It started to rain shortly after he left the mansion to look for his archer, and here he was kneeling in a puddle of mud, close to the edge.
The older man stopped behind the archer, not ready to say anything.
Clint knew his lover was there, he heard his footsteps and felt his eyes on his back, "I came here the day after we buried you."
Clint took him by surprise. "You love this place," he said dumbly.
"No, I love the memories I have about this place," it wasn't the same without Phil, nothing was the same.
"I can't say how sorry I am," he truly was.
"I can't stop loving you." Clint lowered his gaze, looking at the waves.
"I know," Phil gathered all his courage to pull Clint against his chest and away from the edge.
Clint flinched as his back made contact with Phil's chest, "As much as I hate you for what you did... I-I can't ... I can't stop imagine my life without you and it hurts. I want to hate you with all I have, I want to leave you, I want to pay you back for what you did... but I can't. Because I'm so damn happy that you're here."
"I love you too," Phil tightened his embrace, "and I will never pull a stunt like this again. I wasn't thinking but that will not happen again."
"Damn straight or I'll shoot you myself," the archer whispered. "All this time I blamed myself for not acting. I followed orders for once and got you killed."
"There was nothing you could have done," Clint's body temperature was worrying low, he just wore a shirt.
"I didn't know that," his teeth chattered but he didn't seem to mind, "all I had was your blood."
Phil squeezed his eyes shut, he couldn't bear it, "Let's go back and talk there, you're freezing."
"You're lucky I'm still alive. I desperately tried to get myself killed but villains aren't what they used to be," Clint muttered.
Phil's heart stopped for a shocking moment, "Clint."
"The shrink feared for my life that's why Nick made me an Avenger. They take care of their own. I fought them but they never stopped to care."
"Nick said you're doing okay. He said you're grieving but on your way back to normal," Phil was angry at his friend and himself for believing him.
He should have known better.
"I believed him when he said you're dead, now we're even." Clint tilted his head back until it rested against Phil's shoulder, "I realized that life is meaningless without you."
"I missed you too. So much," he kissed the side of Clint's head. "Everyday was dull without your smile. Let us go back, please," Phil forced Clint to stand up.
The archer turned around, his eyes were red and puffy, there was no life left in his eyes.
"You are real, aren't you?" he reached out to cup Phil's cheek with his hand.
The older Agent leaned into the touch, "I am real, and I will never leave again."
A small smile appeared on Clint's face, the view gave Phil some hope. "Let's go," he took the younger man's arm and lead him back to the mansion.
::::::::::::::::::::
Their fellow teammates watched them as they entered the house but they kept their distance to show their respect. It wasn't on them to fix it.
"Undress," Phil ordered while he searched for warm clothes but Clint didn't move.
Phil realized that Clint's lips were blue and his skin deadly white. "Let me help," he undressed his lover and dragged him into the bathroom.
"Wait a moment," he got fresh clothes for both of them. Phil turned on the shower before he got rid of his own wet clothes. "Come," he grabbed Clint's wrist and pulled him with him into the shower.
The archer winced as the warm water made contact with his cold skin, "hurt," he muttered under his breath.
"I know but we have to warm you up." Phil enclosed the younger man in his arms, rubbing a hand over his back. It felt awesome to feel his lover's skin against his own, he had missed that. He dreamed of Clint every night and fantasized about him during the day, whenever the case gave him time to think. It felt so good to have him close, "I love you, never doubt that."
"Never doubted your love, I knew who you are before I married you and that didn't stop me.
I just thought you would share something like that with me, instead of going behind my back. Letting me suffer," but it was okay, Phil was back and everything would be okay.
"Never again, I promise."
"Don't make promises you can't keep." Clint clung to Phil, "I know you have to do what they tell you and I know you do what you believe is right. It's okay."
"Nothing is okay but it will be," Phil assured and felt how Clint relaxed.
The older agent helped Clint to dress after their shower. Thick socks, sweatpants and Phil's favorite jumper, "Now move your ass to the bed."
"Charming," a little grin graced Clint's lips before he left the bathroom. The archer got into bed and pulled the blanket up to his nose, he was still cold.
Phil eyed his lover for a moment before he joined him. "Come here," he opened his arms to invite Clint into his arms.
Clint snuggled closer and buried his face in the crook of Phil's neck, inhaling his lover's scent. He was back, the love of his life was back, alive and sorry. That was enough for Clint. "Belated happy third anniversary," he shivered.
Fresh tears slid down Phil's face, he had missed their anniversary. Leaving his lover alone with the 'knowledge' that he was dead, celebrating their anniversary most probably at the cliff or at his grave. The thought was terrible and he gave in the urge to kiss his lover.
Feeling Clint's warmth against his mouth was breathtaking, Clint tasted so good. "Not tonight," he panted. "You need your rest," he took Clint's stray hand and guided their intertwined fingers to his chest, giving Clint the opportunity to feel his heartbeat. "Now sleep and get all the rest you deserve."
Clint fell asleep almost immediately.
He hasn't slept in ages, Phil thought while he watched his lover sleep.
Clint was pale, dark shadows under his eyes and he was a little thinner not much but Phil could see.
He saw anything.
The lines of worry on his face, a new scar on his neck, among others. "First thing in the morning I take a look at your medical file," he whispered to himself.
Just as he was ready to fall asleep, too, a whimper jerked him fully awake. "Clint."
The younger man got a slight seizure, it seemed to be more like a panic attack. His hand which lay on top of Phil's chest shook, sweat dripped down the archer's neck. "Phil," he cried out in his sleep.
Phil sat up immediately as he realized what was happening. "Clint, wake up. I'm here," he pulled Clint into an upright position and took him into his arms. "I'm here."
"Phil?" he blinked slowly, still not fully awake but trembling like an aspen leaf.
"I'm here, it's okay. I'm here," Phil assured.
Clint rocked slightly back and forth within Phil's arms, worrying the older man even more "Dreamt you died," the younger man said apathetically.
"That's it," Phil grunted. "Get up, love," he turned on the light and helped Clint out of their bed.
It wasn't easy to get them both dressed but he did it. "We pay Julian a visit," he said after Clint calmed down a little.
"Why?" he didn't want to go.
"Because I know where your state will lead to," he saw it once a few years back and it ended almost badly.
"But I don't need Julian," Clint was just tired and his nightmare gave him a scare, what is Phil's problem?
"Do I need to remind you of Barney?" or the death of your parents, or the death of your first partner? Phil stumbled about Clint's brush with depression and adaptive disorder when he got the archer's file the day they became a team, Clint was too far-seeing to give the true extent of his mental state away. "God you're burning up," his lover's skin was clammy and hot.
"I'm not depressive, leave me alone," he said weakly.
"Maybe not but something is definitely wrong." Phil grabbed his car keys and ordered Clint to follow him. Chiding himself for not realizing it sooner.
::::::::::::::::
"Are they still asleep?" Tony rubbed his eyes as he entered the kitchen.
"I think so," Natasha brewed coffee, "they have a lot to catch up on."
A dirty grin appeared on Tony's face, "Imagine other men while you think I'm not around?" Cap's voice appeared to his right.
"Nope." Stark smiled slyly, "thought of you."
"No you didn't." Steve patted him on the back before he headed for the coffee machine, grimacing at the deep black liquid. Black widows coffee was as deadly as her reputation.
"Bruce still asleep?" Rogers decided to drink milk instead of the coffee.
"Did you wear him out?" Stark couldn't help it, he had a reputation to preserve.
"Actually no," she was too agitated for sex, so they decided to cuddle instead. Not as if Black widow was a cuddler or the big green guy.
"I still can't believe Clint is married to Phil. He seemed so indifferent during the funeral," Rogers mused.
"Clint is not good with emotions. He isn't able to cope the way we do. I don't know why but it's the way it is," Natasha drank her coffee. "People say he was really, really sassy and unsocial before Coulson took him in. I don't know what they have done to him, because I wasn't with S.H.I.E.L.D back then but it must have been something drastic. Love alone does not change your whole social behavior."
Nick's protective streak is the only reason we are Avengers since Phil's 'demise'. Both of them adore him, no matter what. It's scary"
"Kinda hard not to adore him," Tony mumbled.
"I knew it. I'm not the only one here to take a liking on him," Steve grinned, Tony always told him what a nuisance the kid was.
"The kid did everything to protect you, I was a little jealous at times."
"Phil adores Captain America," Nat stated. "Giving up Captain America would have meant giving up on Phil's dreams."
"It must have been so hard," Tony mused, he couldn't imagine losing Steve. His heart constricted painfully at the thought.
The buzzing of Nat's phone put an end to their conversation. "Yeah?" her face fell as she proceeded the information. "When did...," she hurried out of the kitchen and stormed into Clint's room, packing a bag as fast she could. Tony and Steve had followed her into the room in hope to get answers. To their surprise the room was empty. The bed was unmade and pajamas lay on the ground.
"I'm on my way," she put her phone away. "Hurry if you want to come along," they obeyed.
"Natasha talk to us," Steve asked after they left Stark's property.
"I should have known," she hissed. "Clint had a break down and Phil dragged his sorry ass to Julian," Nat added after a long pause.
"Who is Julian?" Tony wasn't sure if he really wanted an answer to his question.
"He's bad news," she gripped the steering wheel tighter. "He's S.H.I.E.L.D's head psychiatrist. I heard his therapy sessions are long and hard. He breaks you and rebuilds your mind afterwards, he has access to meds the world knows nothing about. They say he can almost cure every mental disease. Normally he attends to Agents with PTSD and depression and the like," she sighed deeply, "and if you want to get information out of a prisoner Julian is the first they call."
"He's an psychiatrist / torturer?!" Tony gasped in disbelieve.
"I'm lucky enough not to know the truth because I never met him in person but people talk a lot," she was scared for Clint. "Why has he taken him to Julian?"
"Maybe Phil trusts him," Steve offered an explanation.
"That explains what happened to Clint all those years ago," she shuddered at the thought.
"You mean Clint knows Julian," Tony did not like the thought that the archer might be in the hands of a psychopath.
"Time to find answers," Cap said while they entered the parking lot of HQ.
:::::::::::::::::
"Where can we find Agent Barton?" Steve asked a friendly looking nurse.
"Room P7," she answered, "but I think Dr. McMillan is still with him."
"Thank you," Cap said polite.
"P7?" Tony never heard that before and he was often at the medic department.
"Room 7 at the psychiatric ward," Natasha explained.
"Didn't know you had one," Tony looked around.
"It's not exactly an extra department, they just have their own rooms here," Natasha was there once for her evaluation check after she joined S.H.I.E.L.D.
"Here we are," Cap knocked gently, Phil opened the door and slipped out of the room.
"Bringing the whole gang along?" he joked but he seemed tired.
"Wasn't in the mood to argue," Natasha shrugged.
"Not in the mood?" Tony raised a brow. "You weren't able to think straight at all."
Phil chuckled. "That's the big sister complex she developed over the years," black widow was very much in control of herself but she tended to freak out whenever Clint, or even Phil himself, were in danger. Mostly she hid it well and you had to know her to notice but on days she was already riled up it showed through her facade.
"How is he?" Steve asked finally.
"It was just a panic attack, triggered by a nightmare." Phil seemed even more tired than moments before.
They sighed with relief. "But why has he to stay here for one more day?" Natasha remembered the bag she held.
"His immune system is weakened because of the stress I put him through and he developed a high fever and his airways are affected. They just want to make sure he does not develops pneumonia. They start with his treatment and we will continue from tomorrow evening on to force his meds on him," Phil would be very persistent this time. Clint hated meds as much as he hated the medical department.
"Sounds like fun," Natasha groaned.
"Not a model patient then?" Tony could relate to Clint's dislike for medical treatment.
"He's infamous." Phil pursed his lips, taking a deep breath. "I'm not sure how to make him stay the next 24 hours."
"We keep watch," Natasha smiled. "4 against 1, and after I called Bruce we're even 5."
"Deal, he can't flee while we watch," Steve agreed.
"Oh, he can." Phil tilted his head a little while he remembered Clint's last escape, "We just have to keep him busy."
"What do you mean he can?" Tony frowned, it wasn't possible to escape 5 people without physical harm and when he wasn't completely mistaken Clint wasn't such kind of guy.
Phil raised a hand and pointed with his index finger at the ceiling, "Ventilation shaft."
"What does the ventilation shaft have to do with his escape?" Steve studied the ceiling.
"He's practically living up there," Natasha explained. "He likes to be alone most of the time, but he likes to have people around at the same time. He loves to observe the terrain. The first thing during a job for example, is looking for a nest. How do you think he escaped a few weeks ago without leaving a trace?"
She briefed Phil shortly as she saw the confusion.
"So he distracts you, gets up there and vanishes," Tony tried to come up with a plan.
"Yes." Phil sighed, "What have I done Nat?"
"You had your orders," she brushed her shoulder against his, to offer some comfort.
"He was right," the older Agent said, "we have many Agents without a family of their own."
"But they chose you," Nat looked at Steve for help.
"I could have turned the offer down, I could have told him about it," Phil mused.
"It's too late for what ifs," Steve said, "but you can learn from your mistake and prevent to make the same mistakes in the future."
"You sound just like him," Phil's gaze was glassy.
"See, he's smart," Tony praised.
"He forgave me because I am who I am," he smiled sadly. "He said he wants to hate me but he can't 'cause he is happy I'm alive."
"I know how he feels," Natasha said, "the only difference is that his feelings are way more intense."
"You dislike me, too?"
"You faked your death, leaving us behind, of course I feel some hate but I love you too much to act on it," she clarified.
"I crushed his trust," he rubbed his temple.
"Shouldn't be too hard to rebuild." Steve was sure, "but I think you have to live with a few angry outburst in the near future."
"He didn't do that for a long time," he remembered the angry man they forced on him.
"He's normally very controlled. Watching, thinking and acts when he feels he has to," that was the Hawkeye Natasha knew.
"Doesn't sound like the guy we got to know," Tony wasn't wrong.
"Julian taught him how to control his anger and use it to his advantage," Phil kept a close eye on Julian during that time to make sure Clint was alright.
"The rumors we heard about him are less than satisfying," Steve looked thoughtful.
"They are true." Phil confessed, "but he isn't a monster. He does what he has to in order to fulfill his assignment. He likes Clint well enough to be careful."
"And he's scared enough of Nick and you to handle him like glass," a nurse smirked before she passed them to enter Clint's room.
"Uh-hu." Tony couldn't suppress a smirk.
"That's just a rumor, too." Coulson shrugged, that was clearly a lie but they didn't point it out.
After a long moment of silence Phil spoke up, "I owe you guys a thank you."
"Why?" Steve frowned.
"For keeping my husband alive."
"We didn't do anything," Tony chimed in.
"Nick transferred him to you because you care for other people. And that's what Clint needed most. Nick knew you wouldn't let us down, and he was right. That's why I owe you," Phil held Steve's gaze.
"You're welcome," Cap said finally. They didn't deserve Coulson's trust. They ignored the kid and the only reason they watched him was because they didn't knew if he was a treat or not, mixed with pity.
Nick must have kept Cap's request to transfer Clint a secret.
"I got used to him, even his angry, don't you dare talk to me, self." Tony confessed.
"He can stay if he wants to." Steve offered, he felt like they owed the kid.
"I think it's by far more fun than black ops." Phil nodded, "and he's as safe as one can be in our line of work."
"Black ops is S.H.I.E.L.D.'s special unit right?" Tony had found a few classified files while he spied on their new allies.
"Let me put it this way. You guys are our daytime model heroes and black ops does anything behind the scene, far away from public view." Phil knew Tony would hack their system again, no matter what he said.
"You're right he's safer with us." Steve agreed, he just hoped the stories were true and he wasn't such a pain in the arse with Coulson around.
"Phil," the door to Clint's room opened and an elderly man exited, he was around 6 feet tall, his hair was dark with white strands, his eyes were blue and warm.
"How's he doing?" the Agent asked.
"He's asleep, I keep him sedated for a while. He needs rest, what worries me is his fever but with some luck it will break soon. His inner turmoil weakened his immune system and makes him prone to infections," the explanation was meant for Barton's fellow teammates, "but it's nothing plenty of rest and affection can't cure."
"Thank you doctor," Steve nodded.
"I gave him some Serum 112," he added for Phil's information.
"Was it really necessary?"
"Just a precaution," Julian said.
"What's Serum 112?" Tony never heard of it before.
"It affects the chemistry in Barton's brain, to ease some of his fears. It calms him down and offers... some comfort," the doc explained.
"You toy with his brain?" Steve was angry, no one had the right to interfere with emotions.
"We inject Agents with Serum 112, while they suffer from PTSD just to send them back into the field, immediately after the injection," he pointed out the fact. "He can call himself lucky not to be one of them."
"It's unethical and irresponsible," Steve hissed, problems had to be solved and not... obliterated.
"It keeps our Agents alive," he stated simply. "I can live with that," McMillan bid goodbye.
"Coulson," Steve was in a don't mess with me mood.
"Don't even start Mr. Rogers," Phil dismissed him. "Every Agent has experiences with one drug or another," he turned around and entered Clint's room.
"Hey, Hawkeye," he said to the sleeping man. "Seems like we're stuck in here again," Phil got into bed with Clint. "We need bigger beds," he muttered under his breath as he tried not to fall off the bed.
"How often?" Tony dragged a chair closer to Clint's bed.
"Often." Natasha snorted, "You guys are regulars, too, and you have to bear in mind that we're doing this far longer than you."
"Often it is," Tony made himself comfortable.
"He looks awful," Cap occupied a chair next to Tony. His skin was flushed, sweaty hair was plastered to his clammy skin.
"Still pretty." Phil argued, gently caressing Clint's belly.
They watched over Clint for hours before the drug wore off, not taking shifts like they intended to do. No one had the heart to leave them alone for long.