Chap2 UP!

Hope ya'll like it.

I stared into the snow-covered ground for quite sometime, unable to comprehend what had just happened.

I watched the snow fall heavier, the flakes becoming thicker, and knew I should have been cold, but I couldn't feel a thing.

I was numb, but it wasn't because of the cold.

I don't know how long I sat there and stared into the white world around me.

I don't remember thinking about anything.

I stared blankly around me with no motivation to get up and find him or to stay there and mope.

I don't know how I managed to get up from the hood of my car. I had previously felt glued to it.

I walked towards the garage subconsciously—as if I had no control over my movements.

"Where'd he go?" I asked Bex as I entered the garage.

"Uh…I don't think he—"

I cut her off, "Where is he?" I sounded hysterical to myself, but I wasn't the one that was talking. Something completely took over my body.

"His room," she told me.

I hurried out of the garage, ignoring their questions.

When I got to his room, I stopped in the doorway.

He was lying on his bed, his face planted in his pillow as if he was trying to suffocate himself.

His shoulders were shaking. He let out a sob.

I transformed back into myself.

I walked silently into the room and sat on the edge of his bed, unsure of what to do.

"Get out," he said between sobs.

"I can't," I whispered. "I won't."

He didn't respond, but he held in his tears.

I stared at the green walls and smiled to myself as I remembered helping him paint them.

It was only four months before, but it felt like a lifetime.

"How can you keep doing this to me?" He inquired after about five minutes of silence.

I sighed, "I'm not doing anything to you, Zach. I meant what I said."

He scoffed and sat up, "Yeah, right."

"Zach!" I exclaimed, "Why the fuck would I make it up? So you could reject me? I love you, damn it! As crappy of a person as I may be, I am nowhere near that cruel. I know…somewhere…you know that as well."

I wanted to reach out to him, but there was no point.

I knew he would brush me off. I knew it'd probably only make everything worse.

Even knowing all that, though, I had to sit on my hands to stop myself from doing it.

I looked deep into his eyes and tried to make him understand.

He immediately looked away and I realized exactly what was going on.

"I get it," I said, "You want to be with me just as much as I want to be with you, but you want me to know just how badly it hurts to be rejected and ignored and used the way I used you."

I sighed, "I don't know how many times I can apologize for that. I was wrong. I screwed up. I know I did, but for God's sake, I love you. I would never, ever say something like that to you if I didn't mean it."

"Then what about wanting me to wait for you?" He asked tiredly, as if the arguing exhausted him.

I was silent for a moment.

It was hard to explain how I felt about that, but I knew I had to if I wanted him to understand.

"I…Josh tried to rape me, Zach. He tried to rape me and when I didn't let him, he hit me. I know…you would never do it. I know you wouldn't…but this is crazy, Zach. I'm a lot more affected by it than I let on," I paused, burying my head in my hands.

"There's no way I can say this to you without having you think that I'm saying you're capable of doing what he did to me. What happened between Josh and I changed me…and I'm not sure that it would be fair to you to subject you to that change without at least warning you."

"So you're ready for a relationship?" He inquired.

I nodded, "It makes no sense, I know. I realized that I can't put my life on hold though. I have messed with you so much…I can't keep doing it…" I sighed and searched for the words I needed, "I love you, Zach. I've never felt like this for anyone before."

He sighed and remained silent.

I was desperate to continue this conversation.

It finally felt like we were getting somewhere.

"Just give me a chance," I begged, "I'd do anything…" I trailed off, an idea sparking in my mind. "I can prove it," I told him suddenly, "I just need one thing from you."

"What's that?"

"I need you to go to the show on New Year's Eve and play," I said softly. "I know that it's difficult, but Grant and Bex have worked so hard."

He nodded, "Fine. I'll do it."

I smiled, "Thank you, Zach."

10:00 pm

Netopia overflowed with people.

Many teens from Gallagher had heard about the concert and showed up.

Bex, Macey and Liz were definitely responsible for that.

Music was pounding from the radio as we finished setting up.

It wasn't a normal coffeehouse setting.

It was loud and exciting. I couldn't wait to start playing.

"Are you sure these songs will fill forty-five minutes?" Zach asked me. "They're the shortest ones we've written."

I nodded hurriedly, not looking him in the eyes, "Come on, Zach…we gotta take into account the massive crowd support we're going to get between each song."

He laughed, "Wishful thinking."

I shook my head, "We're good and you know it."

"So do you want to tell me what you have planned tonight that Grant and Bex are so hush-hush about?" He inquired after backing me into a corner so I couldn't leave until he got the answer he was looking for.

I smiled, "That would ruin the fun."

He shrugged, "So?"

I got really close to him, but didn't touch him, "It would ruin the surprise as well."

He seemed unfazed, "I don't like surprises."

"Oh, well," I told him and placed my hand gently on his chest, "You'll like this one."

I could feel his heart beat speed up as I touched him and smiled to myself. This is going to work, I said to myself.

I moved from Zach without any objection and looked for Bex. I came up behind her and squeezed her hand. "Can you believe we're actually going to do this?" I squealed.

She smiled at me and we went to peek out behind the curtain to see how packed the place was.

"I just can't wait to get out there," I told her, "It's gonna feel so good to hear people's responses."

She stopped me, "We have a problem."

"What?" I couldn't figure out what could be wrong. We were finally going to play for everyone to hear us.

She sighed, "Look out there."

I peeked out just as she had done before. There stood Josh in the first row looking right back at me. He winked at me and I had to contain myself both from crying and from strangling him.

I turned away from him and sat down on a box that held a speaker. "I can't go on with him right there." I whispered to her, burying my face in my hands.

I felt a hand rest on my shoulder and I flew up. Grant's blue eyes showed nothing but concern as I sat back down, holding in my tears.

I hadn't had to face Josh for almost two weeks. I thought I was getting over it, but it was obvious to me then that I wasn't. The wound had been reopened.

"What's going on?" Grant asked Bex.

"Take a look for yourself," she gestured towards the curtain. Grant did as he was told and came back to us looking angrier than ever.

"What is he doing here?"

I laughed bitterly, "He can go wherever he wants." The tears started to fall and I saw no point in holding them back anymore. "Why didn't I listen to you, Bex?" I cried. "I should've gone to the police and none of this would happen."

Zach appeared and I buried my face even further in my hands. I cried silent tears as he approached. I could feel his eyes on me and I didn't respond when his arms wrapped tightly around me.

"We'll get him out of here," he told me.

"How'd you know?" I questioned.

"Only one thing could make you this upset," he sighed, "I'll get him out of here. I'd like to do it personally."

I nodded and he squeezed my hands before going onstage. I stood and peeked through the curtain.

He talked to the owner for a moment before he grabbed Josh by the collar of his shirt and dragged him out of sight.

He appeared moments later, rubbing his knuckles.

"You didn't hit him," Bex said, but it wasn't a question.

He shrugged and glanced at me, "Just returning a favor."

I smiled and followed him away from Bex and Grant. "Thank you," I whispered. "There is no way I would have been able to go on knowing that he was out there."

"It's no problem," he insisted and took my hand in his.

I sighed softly. I could feel myself melting as he gently rubbed my knuckles.

I wanted to say something to him—I wanted to say anything—but I didn't know what. I didn't know how to begin or if it was even worth it.

Lately it seemed like as soon as I opened my mouth, everything came out wrong.

"You ready?" Bex approached us not long after.

He and I nodded and reluctantly let go of each other's hands.

We approached the stage nervously. The excited anxiety between the four of us was at the highest point it had ever been.

I had been in plays for years, but nothing had felt like this before. I was finally achieving something for myself.

I heard the crowd of people quiet down as the owner, a thirty-year-old bald man with a dream to become successful in St. Cloud named Bill Newman, announced that we would be on shortly.

I heard Liz and Macey catcall and smiled to myself. I had some great friends and it was pretty bad that it took me so long to realize that.

Bill came back and talked to us for a few minutes about the size of the crowd. He seemed just as excited as we were. He said it was excellent publicity for the coffeehouse and we could most definitely return if we kept this type of crowd.

"And now," he said over the noise of the crowd, "No Stereotype!"

The coffeehouse erupted with whistles and applause. I smiled at Bex and we started playing.

Our first song was one that I had written when I was beyond angry with the three of them after the cabin incident titled "You Don't Know."

Our set went by unbelievably fast with incredible praise from the audience.

It was obvious that they were really into the music. I was happy that they liked it because I knew that a majority of them just went to support us, but I could see in their eyes that they loved it.

We ended up playing a few extra songs that weren't on the set. Even Bill was into the music.

It was nearing midnight and I glanced at Bex and Grant and they signified that they were ready.

"Thanks, guys," I said into my microphone, "Have a great night!"

Everyone applauded and catcalled and one guy shouted out, "Can I kiss you at midnight?" I smiled to myself as the curtain closed.

Bex and Grant pulled Zach offstage as quickly as they could, making up some excuse that I didn't really care about as long as it worked.

"You ready?" Bill asked me quietly after making sure Zach was out of hearing range.

I grinned and nodded, "Definitely."

"You must really be into this guy to do this for him," he commented.

I nodded again, "Yeah, you could say that."

The curtain reopened and the crowd looked at me expectantly. I put a finger to my lips, hoping they would get the message and keep quiet until I was ready to begin.

They were a pretty responsive crowd, and for the most part, acted like I wasn't even there.

I tapped lightly on the microphone. "Normally," I began, "I'm not big on bands that do covers…but I figured that this would be kinda cool." I smiled as Zach peeked his head out of the curtain beside me, a confused look on his face.

I could also tell from the way he was looking at me that Grant and Bex had a pretty strong grip on him, making sure he wouldn't do anything to screw this up.

I picked my guitar up and continued, "So girls…what do you think of these guys?" The catcalls made me beam. "I think so, too…so…this is for Zach…I told you I'd prove it."

The music began behind me. While I fully intended on playing, I wasn't a band. One singer can't play more than one instrument.

"Another day is going by

I'm thinking about you all the time

But you're out there

And I'm here waiting…"

The coffeehouse exploded in applause as I sang Simple Plan's "I'd Do Anything" for Zach. The song described exactly how I felt for him.

It also didn't hurt that it was one of Zach's favorite songs.

"And I wrote this letter in my head

'Cause so many thing were left unsaid

But now you're gone

And I can't think straight

This could be the one last chance

To make you understand

I'd do anything

Just to hold you in my arms

To try to make you laugh

Somehow I can't put you in the past

I'd do anything

Just to fall asleep with you

Will you remember me?

'Cause I know I won't forget you…"

I finished the song without putting much effort into it. Everything seemed to be happening perfectly.

As I finished, the crowd let out the biggest roar I'd ever heard. I knew right then that nothing would ever compare to this moment.

I glanced around for Zach, praying that he would come onstage and do something—anything.

I needed a reaction from him. I couldn't imagine him being angry with me, but he was Zach. He never really needed a reason to act completely different than I imagined him to.

He stepped out after what felt like years of agonizing silence.

He seemed uncertain, but as he stepped closer, a grin spread across his face and he pulled me to him. If I thought the crowd was loud before, it was nothing compared to this.

The catcalls and whistles were amazingly loud.

I glanced towards Bex and Grant who were grinning just as wide as I was. Even Bill seemed touched by the whole scene.

"Kiss her," the guy called from the crowd again, "One of us should be able to."

I smiled shyly as he did just that. He pressed his lips to mine tenderly, a kiss we hadn't yet experienced. We pulled apart soon after, aware of the crowd before us.

"I love you," I whispered to him, pushing my forehead to his.

"I love you, too," he sighed happily and pushed his lips to mine again for another sweet kiss.

I didn't feel anything but his arms around me, his lips against mine, and I knew then that it would be all I felt for quite some time.

By the way, THIS IS A TWO-SHOT.

R&R!