Superman put his questions regarding Gabrielle Watkins' motives regarding the assignment of his new partner aside as he introduced himself to the man who was clearly an experienced journalist if he was reading his visual cues correctly. Though he was half expecting it, there was no ironic expression of "Sure you are" on Eric Hernandez's face when he'd introduced himself to the man as Clark Kent, just as there had been no such expression on Jason Lee's while the boy had been helping him get set up, indicating that it was only the Editor in Chief who had been briefed on the exact nature of his other identity. Throughout their introductions to each-other which had gone through without the revelation that Superman was standing in the office "playing journalist" being made to the general public, Hernandez had remained at a polite distance from him and didn't give him more than the sort of generally appraising look one would give any reasonably attractive person. Since the man was being completely professional, unlike the rather large number of members of both sexes he'd had to fend off over the years, he decided that so long as his partner kept things professional and didn't attempt to pursue him, he could very easily keep silent regarding his old opinions on certain "lifestyle choices" which at the moment he couldn't really bring himself to give a damn about, but might end up doing later if the Bat brat got what he wanted.

After introducing himself, Hernandez had made some attempts at small talk in an apparent attempt to sound out his new trainee/future work partner, and get a handle on his character. As Hernandez asked where he'd gotten his "retro" tie which the other man found to be cool, he idly noted that his new Editor in Chief was standing in the doorway of her office watching the exchange like a hawk. He didn't know what she expected or wanted to see, but based on her expression, she clearly wasn't seeing it. Considering their recent meeting, it was entirely possible that the woman was looking for a legitimate excuse to fire him, and him failing to get along with Hernandez or saying something inappropriate about the man's homosexuality, especially to his face, would provide her with that excuse.

In his younger years after he first took up the cape, back when he'd stopped being the farmboy and wasn't certain whether he was Superman or the Journalist who used his job as a means to find out where Superman needed to be to do the most good but also did good with and rather liked his job as a journalist, he'd done his best to keep quiet about his opinions on matters such as race, religion, and a woman's place in society when he wore the suit. Back then, he chose to rescue whoever needed rescuing, never passing judgement on those he saved. Instead, he'd reserved his judgement for those who would harm the innocent, enemy combatants, and those who guarded enemy assets. So, it wasn't like he was unfamiliar with the concept of keeping silent regarding something he didn't agree with or believe in, and he damn well knew the line between something that could alienate a co-worker and something that could get him fired on his first day on the job. Seeing as he wasn't so utterly unprofessional as to get himself fired on his first day...

Seeing as his new Editor in Chief had put him in training under Hernandez, never brought up his prior history as a journalist nor shown or any acknowledgment of his prior experience in the field, and hadn't shown an iota of the awe a journalist would've shown for someone they would've undoubtedly read about while studying for a degree in Journalism upon running into said person, he could reasonably assume that Gabrielle had only been briefed on the fact that he was Superman and not on the fact that he was That Clark Kent. In that light, he could understand why his new boss would want to fire him, considering the fact that he was taking up space that should've belonged to someone who had a degree that wasn't eighty years old which the Editor in Chief could verify existed and wasn't a Wayne created forgery like his identification was. After all, the woman had to know that all of his paperwork was forged by the Waynes who'd ordered her to hire him in the first place, and she had no reason to not believe that all of his other qualifications were forged as well.

The thing was, his qualifications weren't so much created out of thin air using the occasional name from his past like the rest of the history that had been created for him was as re-dated, since they were nearly fifty years out of date. His Journalism degree was over eighty years old, and his last job in the field had ended forty-five years before when he'd killed off Clark Kent.

While pondering the issue and his new boss' reasons for wanting to fire him, old journalistic instincts that had long since gone dormant began actually wondering what his new Editor in Chief thought about one of the Waynes throwing his weight around and hiring Superman himself for a job that appeared to be well outside of the superhero's skill set from a human interest angle. That part of his mind which he hadn't used in years, that part of his mind that had belonged to the reporter he once was, then started analyzing the situation as if it were one of his stories, looking for the right angle to go at it from. Within seconds, that part of his mind, which had been quiet for ages, was already drafting the "Alfred Wayne Hires Superman as a Reporter!" article, and slipping in appropriately ironic quotes about how ill-suited someone who flew around lifting heavy objects and setting things on fire with eye lasers was for such a job.

He was rapidly pulled out of his article drafting when his new partner informed him that if they didn't get a move on, they'd be late for the Gotham City Ferret Show.

"Ferret show?" he asked, having never heard of such a thing, even in his accidental eavesdropping on the world which he usually tried to tune out while he focused on more important matters such as where he needed to be next, but couldn't help but overhear when he was out on rescues.

"It's sort of like a dog show, but with ferrets." Hernandez replied. "Since you're a newbie and I'm still recovering from last month's stabbing, Gabrielle decided to put us on the show and convention circuit."

"Stabbing?" he asked, mainly because it was the human thing to do, and Clark would've asked. As far as Superman was concerned, seeing as he'd never met Hernandez before in his life, it was just yet another thing that he'd missed while his attention was focused elsewhere. Considering the fact that the world wasn't a Utopian society where everybody tolerated everybody else and their life choices, he could easily guess why Hernandez got stabbed without asking.

"A bondage club that was into more than bondage didn't like the expose I did on them." Hernandez replied with a shrug of his shoulders, surprising him, because he'd been expecting something else entirely. "Considering the fact that they don't usually pair a newbie that nobody's ever heard of with an experienced investigative reporter, I'm guessing that Gabrielle assigned you to me in an attempt to keep me out of trouble."

At that last statement from Hernandez, part of Superman's mind went "Oh, God!". It was just his luck that he'd be paired with another danger magnet like Lois. He'd loved Lois, loved her with his entire heart and soul. But, when she was hot in the pursuit of a good story, she became what was probably one of the most annoying things on the planet: Someone who was completely lacking in any survival instincts whatsoever and completely incapable of spotting danger. Since she had been utterly incapable of keeping herself out of danger for five minutes when she was hot on the trail of one of her front-page, above the fold with three inch tall headlines stories, he had constantly been forced to rescue her several times in a row as he attempted to deal with the situation she'd uncovered and/or gotten herself involved in. Bruce had often wondered what he'd seen in Lois, considering the fact that she often seemed too stupid to live. But, his wife had had many sterling qualities, including the fact that she was dangerously competent when she wasn't in mortal danger and was frequently an intellectual match for him.

Considering the fact that his new boss knew that he had constantly played rescuer to Lois Lane, as such rescues had ended up in the papers on what was practically a weekly basis, it was entirely possible that he'd been given the Gotham Ledger's danger magnet for a reason other than his potential first-day firing. It would be a practical move to use the superhero who was "Playing reporter" as a superpowered babysitter for a reporter who was both actually worth something, and incapable of staying out of danger. If that was indeed the case, it would seem that he'd completely underestimated Ms Watkins.

Riding to the ferret show in an actual car rather than flying there - doing three rescues, buying a bagel on the way and still arriving before his partner - the way he used to do with Lois was a trial in patience. He'd tried to split up and go his usual way, but his new partner had insisted they come together. Apparently, this was so the man could get to know him and set some ground rules and a few boundaries in regards to their work relationship. Not caring to get in an argument, he'd followed Hernandez down to the parking garage where the man led him to a rather plain looking sedan. The car was neither new, nor old enough to qualify as a classic. It was one of those not too clean nor too dirty vehicles that were kept around and duly repaired rather than replaced because they'd become something like the family pet. Despite the number of dents and scratches the vehicle possessed, Hernandez was rather slow, careful, and methodical for a city driver.

As he sat in the passenger seat of Hernandez's car, he received the "I'm your superior because I have seniority, therefore what I say goes" speech, and the "If you try to steal my work, they won't find the body" speech, as well as the "If you try to steal my office supplies, I will gut you" speech. Lois's versions of all three speeches which she had given him when he'd first arrived at the Planet and been assigned as her partner nearly eighty years before had been far more intimidating, even with their complete lack of profanity and graphic depictions of violence. Part of the reason for that may have been because Lois was fully capable of succeeding in a cutthroat environment that had been considered a man's world back then. In those days, a woman had to be nearly ten times as good as a man with the exact same job title, and the men knew it.

The ferret show had started off rather mundanely, and had looked to be a rather boring start to a boring first day out. Being press, they had been rather warmly welcomed by the ferret owning crowd which had been happy to show their prized pets off to a pair of reporters, even if the medium said reporters worked in was print. Since he was trying to behave as Clark Kent would've done, he duly complimented each smelly animal that was practically shoved under his nose and inquisitively asked the owners, the judges, and the hosts of the event every question Clark would've asked. There was one moment when he figured he must've made a mistake somewhere due to the watchful and somewhat negative reaction he'd received.

What was so wrong with spending five minutes interviewing an eight year-old girl, complimenting her pet, and patting her on the head before moving on to interview someone else? He knew there'd been any number of pedophile scares in recent years, and he had actually dealt with a number of such creatures over his decades as Superman, but seriously? He'd sooner gnaw his own arm off than touch a kid that way.

It had been while he'd been very, very, very carefully handling an oddly colored version of one of the smelly little creatures he'd come to see and complimenting it the way that Clark would've that he realized that Hernandez, who'd previously been working the other side of the room, was gone. A quick look around with his x-ray vision since he wasn't quite yet attuned to the man's voice revealed that the man had pulled a Lois and found the only bit of real danger for miles. This bit of danger involved a couple of men with guns and what looked like drugs being smuggled in ferret carriers.

After a quick excuse that involved having to use the bathroom and a quick disappearance, Superman was soon on the scene, Hernandez was safe, and a pair of armed idiots were in the custody of police officers who seemed confused as to what the hell Superman was doing there since he'd usually left the small stuff to them, and Gotham was Batman's territory.

After they'd gotten back to the Ledger, Gabrielle Watkins took one look at the first story submitted under the Eric Hernandez and Clark Kent byline and sighed "I sent you out to do a human interest piece about tube rats, and you run into a drug smuggling ring. Only you Eric, only you..."

Seeing Watkins' long-suffering expression, he remembered that twinge of pity he used to feel for Perry every time Lois had done the same thing. Somehow, he didn't think this was a coincidence.

Apparently, a certain someone had thought the best way to get him to reconnect with humanity was to stick him in a familiar situation and get him to swing back into things like a man riding a bicycle for the first time in years.

That brat in the bat parka was going to pay.

A woman who was pushing seventy stared at the newspaper in her hand. Though the name was most likely a coincidence since there were plenty of Kents out there and at least one of them - possibly a Clark Gable fan or even one of the few remaining Clark Kent fans - was going to name his son Clark, part of her mind still screamed "Daddy!" with childish glee when she caught sight of it. If it was really...If it was really him, she didn't know how she felt about it. She'd always known that she was adopted, and therefore not really his. Not that he was a bad father or anything, just frequently absent when he was there, and after he'd left and didn't come back...It wasn't like she, her children, and the grandchildren were really related to him...

Still though, she had wished that the man who'd raised her, the man she'd called father, would come back if only just once every day since he'd left.

Omake:

"What the...?! Again?"

"Well, that's more creative than his usual..."

"Why can't Superman find some other government agency to hack when he's bored?"

"Probably because we don't send armed agents to his house every time he does?"

Omake 2:

"I need to go iron my dog." he said, not even bothering to come up with a believable excuse for why he was leaving. Considering the fact that he'd used that excuse at the Planet twice during the Fifties and gotten away with it, it was apparently good enough.

"I know I've heard that before somewhere..." Jason Lee said before clicking on the search function on his internet browser and typing in the strange excuse that Clark Kent, who half the office was betting was not-so-secretly an axe murderer, had made before departing.

"Oh shit, TVTropes! We're not going to see Jason for a week..." Eric said when he glanced over the young intern's shoulder and saw the result that came up.

Edited 9-1-16.