This particular plot bunny just wouldn't let go. So I set myself a trap and caught myself some meat. Which I'm currently skinning and roasting. I'd hoped to make some bunny soup and get this over with but that just doesn't seem to be happening any time soon. Here is a new chapter for your enjoyment and there is more to come since I still have no idea where this is going. I might end up having to kill off either one (maybe even both!) in order to get this particular bunny out of my head – consider yourself forewarned! Then again we might be drowning in fluff when I finally do finish – again, consider yourself forewarned!
Still don't own a thing (sighs sadly) just having fun so please don't sue
-
He'd walked away from her, leaving her standing in his quarters, tears brimming in her eyes as she bit her lip. She wanted nothing more than to call him back to her. To tell him that she did love him, had loved him for a long time. But she didn't.
- This is best - She thought to herself. - This way it won't hurt as much. –
And yet it did hurt. It hurt more than the cancer spreading throughout her body. She sank down to the floor, hugging her knees to her chest as she shivered. She heard him moving around and then the shower started. A door slammed shut with considerable force, leaving her alone.
Somehow she managed to get back up on her feet and gathered her clothes, putting them on quickly. He wouldn't take long in the shower and she wanted to be gone before he got out. If she stayed she would lose everything she was trying to salvage.
She spared a glance at the clock, noting that it was 430 in the morning. Hopefully early enough to get to the hangar deck and back to Colonial One before anyone noticed that she'd spent the night. Hopefully also early enough for no one to notice the state of disarray she was in. She gathered her shoes at the door and opened the hatch. She stepped out and pulled the hatch shut behind her before slipping back into her shoes. She took a moment to take a deep breath and straighten her skirt and jacket. She also ran a hand through her hair in a hopeless effort to straighten it out a little. Taking one last breath she strode out into the corridor, heading for her shuttle.
-
After Bill Adama stepped out of what had turned into a very cold shower he made sure to put on his uniform while still in the head. There was no way he was going to face that woman in nothing but a bath towel. But when he stepped out of the head and did a quick scan of his quarters he found himself alone. She'd already gone. He growled angrily and shook his head.
"What did you expect?" He muttered to himself. He glanced back at his rack. In her hurry to get away and his haste to follow half the bedding had landed on floor. He bent down and picked it up, reaching up he tore the remainder off as well and stuffed all of it into a laundry bag. He pulled out new covers and spent a few minutes making the bed. Taking care to restore it to its previous orderly state.
As he drew back and examined the result a sense of grim satisfaction took hold. Aside from the laundry bag there wasn't a shred of evidence pertaining to the events of that morning. If only he could erase the memories as easily as he had the remnants of her stay. His jaw worked as his anger once more surfaced. He allowed the emotion to stir through him for a moment, savored its bitter metallic taste in the back of his throat.
He spun around and grabbed the laundry bag as he headed out of his quarters. It was still far too early for the dayshift and the corridors were all but deserted. He dropped off the laundry on his way to the CIC.
-
Captain Kelly looked up in surprise as he noticed the Commander's entrance.
"Commander on deck!" He barked and snapped to attention along with everyone else.
"At ease." The Commander snapped in turn as he stopped at the plotting table, casting a look up to the dradis monitors to make sure everything was all right.
"Report." He said, keeping his eyes on the monitors while the captain rattled off the main events of the night shift. It took Kelly all of five minutes, and most of his comments pertained to the party that had been held on the hangar deck. Several crewmembers had had a little too much alcohol and had been taken to LifeStation to sleep it off, another few had been confined to their quarters after getting into some minor trouble. Other than that nothing of note had happened.
He listened to Kelly with only half an ear, until he caught himself scanning the various green markers up on the dradis monitors, looking for one in particular. He grimaced as he realized he was looking for her shuttle. She couldn't have made it back to Colonial One yet, she hadn't been gone that long. But why did he care anyways? It wasn't like she cared even the slightest bit. Forcing his gaze down he turned to Kelly, who had finished his report several seconds earlier.
"Thank you, captain." He said. "You stand relieved. Go get some shut eye."
"Sir." The captain answered, saluting his superior officer. "Thank you, sir." The Commander nodded and turned to the comm officer, requesting a list of scheduled tasks for the day.
-
Billy ran his hand across his face before pushing aside the curtain that separated the press room from the President's office. He was running incredibly late, and he was mentally kicking himself for letting Dee tempt him into having a last glass. One thing had led to another which had resulted in his current pounding headache, and his tardiness. He was sure to get an earful from the President about it. If there was anything Laura Roslin despised it was tardiness.
The President was behind her desk, going through the paperwork. She barely spared him a glance as he stepped inside before turning her attention back to the papers.
"Madam President." He started. "I'm sorry about running late, Dee and I…"
"It's all right, Billy." She murmured, never even looking up. "Could you get me some coffee?" Billy blinked and then frowned. This was nothing like the Laura Roslin he knew. He stood for a moment, staring at his boss. It was only then that he noticed her hair was still slightly wet, as if she'd only recently taken a shower. Her skin was even paler than usual and there were dark patches underneath her eyes.
"Madam President?" Billy asked as concern settled into every fiber of his being. "Are you all right? Did something happen? Are you sick?" He could have hit himself over the sheer stupidity of that last remark. Of course she was sick, she was dying for gods sake. Laura Roslin looked up and offered him a slight smile that bore no warmth.
"I'm fine, Billy, just tired. Would you get me that coffee?" Billy opened his mouth, not at all sure that his boss was okay. Even now, as she looked at him she seemed… absent. As if something were missing from her bright green eyes. Billy couldn't quite put a finger on what exactly was lacking but whatever it was, it was a key element. He was about to ask again when her smile, cold as it was, dissipated completely.
"Leave it Billy." She snapped. "Just get me my coffee."
"Yes, ma'am." Billy answered, responding immediately to the commanding tone in her voice. It wasn't a tone she used often on him, but when she did he knew better than to try and argue. It didn't stop him worrying though.
-
Over the course of the following few days Billy watched his boss very carefully, although he refrained from asking any more questions. She clearly felt no desire to talk about it, whatever it was. And so Billy found himself forced to figuring it out on his own. Fortunately she did give him some clues.
That very same morning Dee called to inform him that the Commander had cancelled the military briefing that had been set later that day. When he informed the President of the news he fully expected her to request a rescheduling. Frankly it had surprised him that Dee hadn't asked for one to begin with. But the President simply nodded at the news and returned her attention to her paperwork. Billy hadn't pushed the matter but did take note. Especially when the Commander didn't call.
It wasn't unusual for one of their bi-weekly military briefings to get cancelled. The President and Commander were both extremely busy and sometimes things came up. But whenever either one was forced to chancel they'd usually call somewhere during the day. Just to keep one another updated. This time around though it wasn't the Commander that called but rather Colonel Tigh. The President didn't seem too surprised though and maybe there was even a hint of relief in her eyes.
Several days passed during which Billy noticed that the President and Commander seemed to be avoiding one another. A second briefing was cancelled, although this time by the President. And they still weren't talking to each other.
Billy was worried that the Commander and the President had had another falling out. So after three days had passed he waited until he was dismissed before he shuttled over to Galatica and went in search of Dee.
-
He found Dee in the mess hall, picking at her food while she tried to finish her comm report. She put the work aside though when she noticed him and smiled.
"Billy, I didn't expect you tonight."
"I have to talk to you." Billy answered as he pulled up a chair. The serious expression on his face dulled Dualla's smile a little.
"Is something wrong?" The young woman asked.
"I don't know. Maybe. Probably." Billy answered.
"What is it?"
"The President. I think something happened." A look of concern crossed Dee's face as she leaned closer to Billy.
"What happened? Is she all right?"
"She says she's fine, but she's been distant, out of sorts."
"You tried asking her?"
"Of course." Billy answered with a note of indignation. "She wouldn't tell me, just said she was fine and that I should leave it. But I think it has something to do with the Commander."
"The Old man?" Dee asked. "How come?"
"They've been avoiding one another. Their last two meetings were cancelled and haven't been rescheduled. They're not even talking to each other on the phone. You don't think they've been arguing do you?" Billy asked. "Because she can't take much more, and if he's…"
"He's not." Dee answered, a sharp edge to her voice. "He wouldn't." She added, purposely softening her voice. "Besides he's been nothing but a perfect gentleman with her."
"Are you sure?" Billy asked, still feeling a little defensive of his boss.
"I'm sure. You saw the way they were at the naming ceremony." Billy nodded. The Commander had indeed been the perfect gentleman with Laura Roslin, had been for quite some time in fact. Maybe not exactly since Kobol, but something had definitely changed since then, something that had blossomed and grown.
"Something happened though." Billy muttered. "She seemed well enough then but she was upset the following morning."
"So, where did she go after the ceremony?" Dee asked. "If you can figure out where she was maybe you'll figure out what happened."
"I don't know where she went. Back to Colonial One, I suppose, but I was with you." Dee shook her head.
"She didn't go back right away, her security detail was at the party remember, if she went back they would have gone with her. The only time they ever leave her side is when she's on Galactica."
Before Billy could continue they were interrupted when Hotdog and Racetrack stopped at their table. The two pilots were just coming off duty and had come to the mess hall to get some food when they noticed the two youngster sitting with their heads together.
"Hey." Hotdog called out as he drew up a chair from a nearby table and pivoted it around before sitting down.
"What are you two lovebirds up to?" Racetrack asked, pulling up a chair as well.
"Nothing." Billy answered. "It's just…"
"Billy's worried about the president." Dee said. "She's been acting odd ever since the ceremony, and we're trying to figure out what might have happened."
"What do you mean odd?" Racetrack asked a note of concern slipping into her voice.
"I don't know." Billy answered with a slight shrug. "She's just… not herself."
"Did you see where she went after the ceremony?" Dee asked. "She didn't go back to Colonial One."
"No," Racetrack answered. "Her shuttle stayed put for quite a while if I recall."
"I know." Hotdog answered, grinning devilishly. "I saw her leaving with the old man. Looked pretty cozy too. Hey!" He glared over at Racetrack whom had just punched him in the arm rather hard.
"What?" Hotdog asked. "I happen to think it's great. The old man getting some racktime with the president. It'll do them both a world of good and by extension us too."
"You're kidding." Billy gasped.
"Don't worry." Racetrack said. "He's just jerking your chain, Billy. He doesn't mean it."
"Yes I do." Hotdog persisted, still rubbing his arm.
"No." Racetrack growled grabbing his arm and pulling him up to his feet. "You don't, now let's get going, I'm starving." The two pilots left with Hotdog still grumbling under his breath as Racetrack pulled him over to the cafeteria.
"Is he serious?" Billy asked, looking at Dee.
"No!" Dee answered immediately, her voice rising with indignation. But even though her answer had been immediate the moment she thought about it doubt settled in.
"They wouldn't." She said again, trying to lay her own doubts to rest. "They don't even like each other all that much."
Billy didn't respond as he ran through the various meetings he had witnessed between his boss and the old man. There had clearly been some very guarded moments between them at first. But then there were those brief moments where all that just seemed to melt away. The dance on Cloud Nine, during the Colonial Day Celebration being one of those moments. And then the moment when the Commander and President first laid eyes on one another under the green canopy of Kobol's forests.
Dee seemed particularly uncomfortable with the suggestion Hotdog had made and didn't feel like discussing it any further. Billy stayed for a couple more minutes but then excused himself, telling Dee he wanted to make sure the President was all right.
-
When Billy arrived back on Colonial One he found the President's office deserted and the light in her private chambers dimmed. He knocked on the doorsill lightly.
"Madam President, are you awake?" He asked softly. When no answer was forthcoming he turned around and quietly started to clean up her desk, setting aside the papers that she'd read and signed and replacing them with new stacks for the following morning.
Laura Roslin lay in bed and listened to Billy moving around in her office. She'd ignored his knock and soft spoken question. She didn't feel like facing the worried look she was bound to get from the young man. She turned over on her side, trying to find a comfortable position. It was a futile effort though. Her sleeping arrangements might be a lot of things, comfortable clearly wasn't one of them. Not that she would have been comfortable even if she were lying in the best bed on the Rising Star. Her discomfort had nothing to do with the state of her bed and everything to with the lack of company.
Every time she closed her eyes she could feel his arms around her, strong and warm as he'd drawn her against his body. She shivered under the blankets and stifled a quiet moan. In a moment of despair and loneliness, a moment of need, she had seized upon a dream and forced it into reality. All she had wanted was a connection and she had been more than willing to settle for something purely physical. She hadn't dared to ask for anything more, she didn't think she deserved even as much as she had gotten.
She had never expected him to offer her his heart. And in a moment of panic she had trampled all over it. But once the panic had drained away she had made no effort to correct her mistake, had in fact compounded it by leaving. And by avoiding him she certainly wasn't helping things now. It was her only choice though. She couldn't afford for him to fall in love with her. Humanity couldn't afford it.
When she was gone Baltar would take her place. The scientist had already turned out to be an utter failure as vice-president, he wouldn't do any better once he became President. Which meant that the responsibility for the survival of humanity would fall entirely to the Commander. And once that happened he couldn't afford to be distracted.
She knew that for William Adama love was not a fleeting matter, quite the contrary. It ran deep with him, past reason and logic, past sanity even. He had shown as much when Kara Thrace disappeared. He had simply refused to accept the reality of her death and had endangered the entire fleet searching for her. The fact that Lieutenant Thrace had managed to survive was irrelevant. Because unlike lieutenant Thrace, there was not a chance that she would survive. For her death was a given. It would be cruel and even dangerous to allow William Adama to love her.
There was a difference however between knowing all that and feeling it. Her head was perfectly clear about what she should do, but that didn't stop her heart from aching. Or her body from yearning for his touch. So she lay tossing and turning, trying to sleep.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
She immediately recognized her surroundings and realized she was dreaming. Even though she knew where she was and knew full well that nothing around her was real she couldn't help but feel a thrill of trepidation travel down her spine. It might be nothing more than a dream, but it was certainly no ordinary dream. Much like the chamalla induced visions her dreams looked, sounded and felt absolutely real. Even as she stood silently, surrounded by giant trees she could feel the cool grass under her bare feet. A gentle breeze tugged at her hair and the deep earthly aroma of the surrounding forest tickled her nostrils. She wore nothing other than her night gown and robe and although the woods around her were damp with freshly fallen rain she wasn't cold.
She started walking, in no particular direction, simply following her own feet. She glanced around but aside from the leaves stirred by the breeze nothing moved. Time slipped by without meaning until she found herself approaching a small clearing. She noticed a figure standing at the centre, and although she couldn't see him very well she knew who it would be before hand. She didn't hesitate in her approach though. He might be a Cylon in real life but this was just a dream and in this world she had nothing to fear from him.
"Hello Laura." He said, as she came to the edge of the clearing. He didn't turn until after he had spoken and when he did he was smiling.
"It's good to see you again."
"I can't say I feel the same way." She responded calmly. Leoben's smile widened into a smirk.
"I see you haven't lost your fight yet. That's good."
"What do you have to tell me, Leoben?" She asked.
"Oh no, Laura." Leoben answered, shaking his head. "This won't be quite that easy. This time, I need for you to really listen."
Laura frowned in response. "What are you talking about?"
"I'll show you." Leoben answered as he reached forward and grabbed her arm in a tight grip. Abruptly the forest around them was swallowed by a darkness so deep and cold that it felt like black water crashing down around them.
Laura gasped and blinked as she found herself standing in CIC, Leoben was still holding her arm and he spun her around now, turning her towards the centre of the room.
"Watch." He whispered in her ear. Laura glanced around the room, her eyes skimming over the familiar faces of Galatica's crew. Noticing the fear and confusion in their expression. She frowned as she followed their gaze, landing upon Lee Adama, who stood flanked by two marine guards, his hands cuffed together in front of him.
"What is this?" She asked, her voice barely above a whisper. She'd never seen Lee in handcuffs. At least… abruptly her heart leapt up into her throat as she glanced back at Leoben.
"No." She pleaded. "I don't want to see this. You can't make me." But Leoben's expression remained impassive and his hold on her arm was like a vice. She tried to break free but he only reached an arm around her chest and pulled her back against him, grabbing her chin in the process.
"Watch." He hissed into her ear. Refusing to see Laura squeezed her eyes shut, Leoben did nothing. But even though she'd closed her eyes she couldn't stop herself from hearing as one of the crew called out.
"Commander on deck." There was a rustle of movement, the crew jumping to attention as the old man entered the command center. She tried to turn her head but Leoben's hand tightened on her chin.
"Open your eyes, Laura." He whispered. "You need to see this."
"No." She breathed through clenched teeth.
Off to her right she recognized Gaeta's voice as he spoke up. "Hey, nice work." The one voice she had dreaded hearing answered the young lieutenant.
"Thanks," Sharon said. "What's going on?"
"A lot happened while you were gone." Gaeta answered in a low whisper.
The sound of heavy boots on the deck approached Laura and stopped almost directly in front of her. She didn't have to look to know who it was, and as he spoke she moaned softly, squeezing her eyes shut even tighter.
"Congratulations to both of you," Adama said in that low, rumbling voice that effortlessly slipped past all her defenses, wrenching at her heart and soul.
"For carrying out a very difficult and dangerous mission. You did it despite any personal misgivings you may or may not have had and for that I'm very proud."
"Thank you, sir." Racetrack's voice. Then Sharon's voice.
"Thank you, sir." Followed closely by his own.
"Thank you." The shot sounded more like an explosion. And it startled her into opening her eyes. What she saw very nearly stopped her heart. Almost directly in front of her was Bill, stumbling back against the plotting table. Sharon had her gun out and everyone looked on in horror as she stepped closer, raised the gun and fired a second shot. The impact of the second shot slammed into his body, the force of the blow throwing him back across the plotting table. Laura didn't realize she was screaming until she became aware of the sound pounding on her own ears.
Two crewmembers stormed Sharon and wrestled her to the ground but Laura hardly noticed. Across the table Lee was screaming as he reached out and cradled his father's head. Tigh stood alongside him, looking pale as he tried to stop the bleeding with his hands. Laura fought with all her might against Leoben's hold on her, reaching out to the man lying unconscious before her. Bleeding, dying.
Abruptly Leoben let her go and she stumbled forward. Her bare feet slipped on the pool of blood on the deck and she slammed into the plotting table, getting the wind knocked out of her. She gasped for breath, her hands slick with blood as she reached out and grabbed hold of his uniform. Everyone around her had vanished, leaving her alone with her grief.
She knew it had already happened. Knew that he had survived this. But it didn't stop her heart from breaking as she witnessed what could very well have been his undoing. Luck and sheer stubbornness where all that had stood between him and death. Tears streamed down her cheeks and sobs wrenched their way through her body ad she pulled his limp form closer, desperately looking for the warmth she remembered so well. Cherished so very much.
"She'll kill him, Laura." Leoben whispered, putting a hand on her shoulder and leaning against her back. Laura ignored the feeling of his body pressed against her own as she tore at Bill's blood soaked uniform, hoping to stop the blood that was pooling all around him.
"You have to stop her. You have to save him."
"I'm trying!" She screamed desperately as she finally managed to rip apart his tanks, exposing his bare chest. For the briefest of moments she could only gape at the two large wounds in his skin, oozing blood. She knew where he'd been shot, she'd ran her hand over the small puckered scars several times, but she'd never imagined it would have look like this.
"No, Laura." Leoben whispered, an urgent note to his voice. "You're not seeing it." Leoben's hand once more closed around her arm as he pulled her away.
"No!" Laura screamed, trashing against him. "No, please, you have to let me help him!"
"You can't help him now." Leoben answered. "You have to see it coming. The Gods spared his life this time around but they might not the next time."
"The next time?" Laura asked, abruptly turning to look at Leoben. "What next time? What are you talking about?"
"You have to see it coming, Laura." Leoben said. "You have to stop her."
"Sharon?" Laura asked. "Is she going to try again?" Leoben didn't answer her and let go of her arm, stepping back. Abruptly he was once more surrounded by trees.
"Leoben!" She screamed as his next step took him several yards away. "Tell me!" But Leoben had already melted into the shadows beneath the trees. She started to run after him but fell and the forest floor rushing up to meet her.