A/N - I'm really sorry, this took me a lot longer than I thought it would to write, I've been busy lately. I promise that the next update will come sooner though :)Enjoy!
Disclaimer - I own no aspect of OUAT.
"Did I ever tell you about the time my baby sister almost got eaten by a cat?"
Killian sighed, making a futile attempt to hide his smile as the lad plunged into another story. He had been chattering constantly for hours. The excitement in the castle must have done something to him; Smee always talked a lot, but it was rarely this excessive.
It was hard to believe that this was the same child the castle staff had taken in last year.
He still remembered Jefferson's offhand comment that night, about a young orphaned boy who would be working in the kitchens. He refuses to talk to anyone. His eyes look, but they are unseeing – it's eerie, Killian, I'm telling you.
Reminded of the day he had been orphaned in the palace, Killian had run down to the kitchens immediately. He hadn't had anyone there for him then, and now he never would. He hoped that it might not be too late to bring back the boy out of his visions of the dead.
Every day, during his lunch break, Killian had gone down to visit with the lad. At first, they would simply sit in silent companionship, with Killian stealing a treat from the kitchens for the boy when he could manage it.
Gradually, Smee had grown more used to Killian's presence, and he even drew him pictures once in a while. After over two months of silence, the boy finally asked, "Why are you here?" Killian had almost shouted in relief; he had broken through the boy's emotional barrier. "Because I went through the same thing you did, and I know that no one should have to be alone. Think of me as an older brother, watching out for you," he had responded.
The boy had fallen silent again after that, but had scooted slightly closer to Killian. As the days progressed, Smee opened up to Killian and began to share the stories of his family. Killian was the only person who Smee would even talk to, and it was clear to all those around them that Smee worshipped his new big brother.
Killian had been amazed when Smee had requested to be moved to the stables in order to be closer to him. He did truly care about the boy, but he had always considered himself more of an emotional support than as a real brother. He had tried to stay away from the lad in order to protect him, but Smee reminded Killian far too much of himself to stay away for long.
Smee was his one guilty pleasure, the one person he had allowed himself to care for, the only reason that he knew his heart still worked.
The boy was almost back to normal now, though. He was still terrified of death, but he was no longer obsessed with it.
He had just begun brushing the horse's mane when the door behind them burst open. A woman stood in the doorway, long black hair streaming behind her.
She wore a gown of the deepest red, the color of blood. Killian had never seen her before in his life, but…she seemed oddly familiar. "Hello again, gentlemen," she said calmly. With a flick of her wrist, a burst of red light shot out and hit Smee in the chest. His eyes shot up into his head, and his legs collapsed underneath him.
Killian screamed, running to the boy's side. Surely somebody would hear it, and the guard would be on their way to help. Killian reached out, fingers desperately searching for a heartbeat, a blink, anything that would tell him the lad would be okay.
She looked different, but she had the same voice, the same red sparks. She had come back for him. He had thought he had escaped her forever, but he realized now that the idea had been a serious misconception – one that might have cost Smee his life.
"Now, now, dear. There'll be none of that, if you please. He'll be just fine, as long as you cooperate. I did tell you you'd come of use to me some day, didn't I? I always keep my promises."
"What do you want?" he demanded. He was furious at himself; it was his fault Smee had been placed in danger by this woman in the first place. He should never have allowed himself to care for anyone, much less a young boy who had already lost everything. Killian wasn't worthy of love. Everything he had ever allowed himself to love, or even to care for, had been stripped away from him, and it was all his fault. Looking at the boy's clammy body, he knew he could never allow it to happen again.
"A bit feisty, are we? A bit impatient, perhaps? You had better watch your tongue, young man. You ought to treat your betters with a little more respect, hmm?"
"You will never be my 'better.' You took everything from me; you are unforgivable. You are evil."
"I suppose I did ruin your life, didn't I? Unfortunately for you, there is still so much more that I can take from you. And I prefer wicked, darling. 'Evil' is such last century."
"I won't allow you to hurt Smee. He isn't the one you have a problem with; I am. Leave him alone, let him be free. He still has so much to live for." Killian cradled the boy's head in his lap, willing the woman to leave him alone.
"Touching. I don't want to hurt him, but if you refuse, I might have to. You see, I have a business proposition for you, my dear. When the king and queen order you to their chambers tonight, I demand that you accept their offer. However, you must also take with you this shield. It is enchanted to protect you from death, but you can still be harmed, so I'd advise caution. I must insist that you take it with you. If you can follow orders and do exactly as you are told, there may be something in it for you. A gift, from me."
"I don't want anything from you. Your last 'gift' destroyed my life, I'm quite sure I don't want another. What are you going to force me to do? It can't be good, if you're the one orchestrating it."
"I do believe you would like my gift, darling. You see, I know exactly where Liam is, and I promise that if you carry this out, I will take you to him. You'd like that, wouldn't you? Ah, your face gives it all away. And in response to your other question, I don't believe I wish to tell you. I'll leave that to the charming family waiting inside. You've been impertinent, just the way I remembered. Know that you cannot escape me, and it would be such a shame if something were to happen to this sweet little thing. I will be watching you, my dear. If you are a good boy, you shall be reunited with your brother. If you fail…well, then I'll simply have to show you what you still have to lose."
She ran her finger along Killian's cheek, giving a pointed glance at the boy in his arms, and disappeared into thin air.
…
"Was that the magical sorceress who is going to help find the princess?" Smee asked, shoving Killian's arm away. "Why did you hold me down? I wanted to meet her!" His petulant tone struck Killian the wrong way. Smee was far too fond of the idea of this woman, and Killian knew he might follow her anywhere. If she told him that jumping off a cliff was what was necessary to find the lost princess…well, the boy might just do it. He shared the same dream Killian did, the hope of one day being a celebrated hero. The only difference was that Killian had more common sense in regards to the lengths he was willing to go.
It would be far too easy for the woman to hurt Smee. If Killian was going to save the boy, he had no other choice.
He had to take the witch's offer.
Her words had uncovered even more of his old wounds. Liam…his older brother had left them when he was no more than a child. He had wanted to go on a journey around the world. Killian had begged to come with, but their parents had blatantly refused. You're far too young. It'd be dangerous. Besides, Daddy would get lonely without one of his boys at home. In their defense, he had only just turned four, but he had wanted nothing more than to see the world by his brother's side.
Liam had left, but he hadn't ever returned. Years had passed. Killian had made a point of asking every sailor and pirate he came across if his brother had been spotted since, but the responses had been disappointing. Nobody had even heard of a Liam Jones, and Killian had almost stopped asking. Every time he was told that Liam hadn't been seen, his heart broke anew, and he wasn't sure how much longer he could stand it.
He had tried to be the brother Liam was to him when dealing with Smee, but he knew he could never compare. Liam could do no wrong – he was fearless and daring, protective and strong, caring and kind. Killian had only ever brought pain and death to those he cared about; regardless of how much he tried, he knew that he could never be as good of a brother as Liam had been. He could never be as good of a man as Liam had been, either.
After his shift was over, Killian parted ways with Smee and headed back to his room. He didn't want to be caught where he shouldn't be, especially if the witch's words were correct.
Curiosity had never been one of his flaws, but it was certainly killing him tonight. He had no idea what the king and queen might want him for, especially if the scenario was one set up by the witch. He hadn't seen Snow or Charming since the day they had realized he couldn't tell them anything about where their daughter had gone.
Knowing the witch, they would probably kill him.
A hand grabbed his shoulder in the darkness. "Killian Jones?"
It had begun. He took a moment to compose himself, and then turned around to face his fate. "Yes?"
"Their Royal Highnesses have need of you. They wish to speak to you, and I do believe it would be in your best interests to do as they say."
The guard opened a secret passage at the side of the castle which opened into a servants' tunnel. Killian vaguely remembered it from the days he had spent exploring the palace. The hallways were exactly as he remembered, and everything was exactly where it had been fifteen years before. It was as if he was walking through a dream, and the ghosts of his past were right there with him.
"Here." The guard's voice was gruff as he reached out to open the door. Killian recognized the carving; this led into the nursery. Emma's nursery. He was about to enter the room where his parents had been murdered for the first time in fifteen years.
He worked hard to muster the courage to take a step forward. He was entering the place where his parents had given their lives in order to make a bargain with the woman who had murdered them. The irony was not lost on him.
"Killian Jones, come closer." The king's voice sounded exactly the same as it had the last time Killian had seen him, in this very room. He felt like a child again, terrified and full of jumbled thoughts as he looked at his parents' mangled bodies. He took another step forward, hesitantly.
The king was holding the queen to his side, and they were seated next to Emma's old crib. The room looked exactly as it had before; even though Emma was hardly a baby anymore, the royals had ordered that it be kept as clean as it had been that day. Even though it didn't make much sense after so long, they still had hope that some day their lost princess would return.
"It has been brought to our attention that you may be of use to us, Mr. Jones. We wrote you off as a child because you refused to tell us anything. However, we had both forgotten your connection to our Emma until it was brought up to us again today. Snow and I have decided to give you this chance to prove yourself worthy to us. Find our daughter. If you can bring her back to us, safe and alive, then we shall reward you with treasure beyond your comprehension."
"Please, find Emma. I beg you," the queen added.
Killian could not believe them. They were offering money in exchange for their daughter. They might be desperate, but surely they should be looking themselves instead of paying others to do it for them, especially after fifteen years had gone by without a trace. Killian thought about what they had said. If he was to find the princess, he would be reunited with his lost brother and he would receive enough money to sail them back to their kingdom.
Liam could have his rightful place as king, and Killian could rule by his side. They would be able to save their people. It wasn't a bad deal, but he was hesitant to accept. There had to be something malicious about this; the woman who had stolen Emma away all those years ago surely wouldn't be this desperate to get her back.
"I will do everything in my power to find your daughter, Your Majesty," he told the distraught queen. Smee's life, if nothing else, was worth protecting even at the risk of his own.
"Thank you." The king nodded in his direction, acknowledging what had been said. "You may pack your things and say your goodbyes. You depart at dawn."