Chapter 2 Learning Curve
He drove through the light afternoon traffic in downtown Lexington with one hand on the wheel, the other clutching the cell phone to his ear. Raylan was sure Winona would want him to use the Bluetooth and drive with both hands, but he was afraid to wake Willa up. He glanced in the back seat every few seconds, wishing he could see the baby's face, but there was no sound. She must still be sleeping.
"Hey," he said, when Alison answered.
"Hey yourself. How's your day?"
Raylan glanced in the rearview again, shaking his head at the odd sight of a baby carrier in the back of the Lincoln. "Um, well, I got a little surprise today."
"A good surprise or a not-so-good one?" He heard a car door slam in the background and wondered if he'd just missed her at the courthouse or if she was out on a call.
"A good one, I guess. One I thought maybe you could help me out with."
"Oh? What?" Her voice turned teasing. "Do your pins need reset?"
"Heh, no." He grimaced, thinking of the bowling alley and all the other amenities at the Monroe mansion, now denied him. "Winona popped in for a surprise visit and dropped Willa off with me. We're on our way to check in at the Springhill Suites. I thought maybe you'd wanna come by later and meet her."
Alison snorted a laugh. "No, you thought I'd come over and play mama so you didn't have to do daddy-duty. Sorry. Not interested. I spend all day with kiddos. I did three home visits this morning and I've got two more this afternoon. And that's if there's no emergencies."
"Well, you could come over after she goes to sleep," he cajoled, his voice husky. "Winona says she's down by eight and usually sleeps all night."
"Nuh-uh, no thanks. I'll take a rain check," Alison said. "In fact, that's a little creepy."
"Now wait," he protested. "I was only sayin' it'd be nice to see you."
"Right," she scoffed. "Look, it'll be good for you to spend some time with her."
"There's just so much to remember," he said, realizing too late that it came out more like a whine. "Winona wrote me a goddamn novel full of instructions. I'll never keep it all straight."
"Listen to me," Alison said, her voice taking on a detached professional tone. "You'll be fine. You're not gonna be perfect, no one is, but you want to do what's best for her. You've got good intentions, a good heart, and Winona's notes. You'll be fine," she repeated. "You aren't gonna hurt that baby."
"I know that!" Raylan snapped. "I was just hopin' for a little help." He sighed. "Can I call you later if I'm in over my head?"
"That's what the internet is for, Raylan. If you get stumped, or you have a question about what to do, just google it. There are more parenting websites out there than you can shake a stick at. is the one I recommend most to clients, but babycenter might be best for what you're dealing with. Then, there's , just for fathers."
"Gee, thanks for that info Miss Brander," Raylan said, his tone sarcastic.
"I'll text those urls to you, just in case you forget." Alison offered.
The sign for the hotel appeared on the right and he eased the car into the lot, which was mostly empty at this time of the day. He easily found a parking spot near the door and turned the engine off. He slumped in the driver's seat, head down. Alison had been his last, best hope. The reality that he was truly on his own with his daughter was sinking in.
"Thanks, I guess."
"You're welcome," she said. "Listen, I gotta go. Good luck and have fun with her."
She clicked off.
Fun. Uh-huh. Sure.
The clerk at the reception desk beamed a smile as Raylan sat the baby carrier on the counter, Willa's head lolling to one side. He never understood how babies could sleep that way. No wonder they woke up cranky.
"Givens," he said. "I just made a reservation." He slipped his credit card out of his wallet and handed it over.
"She's a doll," the girl lowered her voice for the sleeping baby. "How old?"
"Almost six months."
The girl's fingers flew across the keys and she squinted at the screen. "Here you are." She slid the card through her machine. "Room 148. I'll get the bellhop to put a port-a-crib in the room for you."
She gave him his card back, along with the plastic room key. "Thanks." He slid the card back into his wallet and pocketed the key.
"Will your wife be joining you?"
"Not married."
"Oh. Well, we have a wonderful breakfast buffet in the morning," she stammered, flustered for a moment. She passed a menu to him. "It's in the bar over there. Is there anything else I can get you?"
"No, that's it." He scooped up the carrier and followed the arrows to room 148. He slid the card through the lock and when it flashed green he turned the knob and went in. It was a spacious room with a kitchenette at one end, a sitting area with a couch, lounger, and flat screen, and a separate sleeping area with two double beds. The curtains were open, flooding the room with afternoon sunshine.
He sat the carrier seat up on the kitchen counter and immediately loaded the milk and food, still cold in the bag, into the fridge. Then, he thought to take the ice pack out and tossed it in the freezer in case they needed to go somewhere over the next few days.
I'm thinkin' like a father. He congratulated himself.
Next, he removed his gun and holster. As he double checked the safety, he thought to himself, Soon enough, I'm gonna have to think about where to safely stow away my gun when she's around. He'd seen plenty of what could happen when kids got ahold of guns, so he understood the need to keep it out of Willa's reach. Still, he didn't like the idea of not having it close at hand. Maybe he'd ask Nelson what he did when he was home.
As he lay the gun on the nightstand near the bed closest to the door, he heard Willa stir.
"Hey, there," he said, watching to see what she was going to do next.
His baby flashed him a toothless smile. He reached over and grabbed a diaper out of the pack of daytime diapers and the wipes from the bag.
"I think it's time for me to check your diaper action," he said, as he walked towards the nearest bed.
He started to lay her down, then thought to grab a towel from the bathroom and placed it on top of the bedspread, then her on top of the clean towel. He lifted up her little dress and unfastened the tapes on one side of her diaper. She was wet, just as he suspected. He grabbed a couple of wipes, cleaned her up and placed a clean diaper underneath her as he simultaneously tossed the wet one to the floor. Quickly, he taped her diaper, pulling it snug for a good fit. Then, he picked her up.
Willa grabbed the sleeve of his shirt to hang on and clung to him like a little monkey. This made it easy for him to walk around with her, supporting her back with one arm, leaving the other arm free.
"Now, this is pretty cool," he said to her. "With you helpin' out, I can work with one hand."
About that time, there was a tap at the door. It was a bellman delivering the crib. Raylan opened the door wider as the young man wheeled it over to the corner of the room and set it up.
"Will ya' look at that," Raylan said, pleased with any help he could garner. "It comes equipped with a mobile. Sea animals."
After the bellman put a fresh crib sheet on the mattress, he showed Raylan the different buttons that operated the mobile with various lights and sound combinations, as well as where to adjust the volume.
"My hands are full," Raylan said. "I'll catch you later on the tip. We're gonna be here for a few days."
The bellman nodded and then on his way out the door, spied the wet diaper on the floor.
"Oh, don't worry about that," Raylan said, reading the young man's face. "I just put it there for a second. I'll clean it up."
After the bellman let himself out, Raylan gently placed Willa on her back in the middle of the bed while he bent down to pick up the wet diaper. In the time it took him to stand up, he looked at Willa in horror.
"When did ya' learn how to do that?" he asked a baby who could not give him an answer.
The baby had rolled over, dangerously close to the edge of the mattress. Raylan stood close to the edge, preventing her from going any further, as he quickly taped up the wet diaper into a little packet and lobbed it over the counter and into the kitchen sink.
"Come 'ere, you," he said, as he scooped her up in his arms.
She smiled and babbled, "Ma-ma-ma-ma."
On his way to the kitchen, he said, "Yeah, I'm sure your mama will be very proud of you, but right now, Da-da needs figure out where I can put you for a few minutes so I can wash my hands."
"Da-da-da-da," she parroted him.
Raylan smiled at the sound of his name. "Yeah, that's right. I'm Da-da-da-da."
He placed Willa back in her carrier seat next to the sink and tossed that wet diaper into the trash. He turned on the faucet and washed up his hands with soap and water. When he was finished, he reached a long arm over the carrier and grabbed a hand towel.
"What do you say I set up a blanket on the floor and let you get in some of that Tummy Time your mama said is so important before I feed you?" he asked as he rifled through the bag. He pulled out a colorful quilt that had all kids of soft toys attached to it, including some that made a rattle noise, and placed it on top. Upon seeing it, Willa excitedly kicked her hands and legs and cooed with delight.
"Oh, you know what this is?" He figured by her animated reaction.
Once again, he scooped her up, grabbed the diaper bag, and took her into the room to a large open space near the crib. With his one free hand, he laid the quilt out flat on the floor. It looked like a little garden and had rattles, a lady bug, and big sunflower attached that had a soft mirror in the center of it. He gently sat her down, but in less than a second, she began to tip over.
"Whoa now," he said, placing a quick hand at her side to steady her.
Willa reached for a soft cloth stuffed carrot that was attached to the blanket with Velcro and gave it a tug, releasing it from its grip. Immediately, the carrot went into her mouth.
"Ne-ne-ne-ne," she jabbered as she gnawed on the toy.
Raylan lowered his long, lanky frame onto the floor, never losing his grip of the baby and maintaining the use of his hand as a brace for her to retain her balance. Once he was down, he picked her up placed her down on her tummy near the sunflower mirror. She held herself up on her forearms, fascinated by her reflection.
Taking advantage of the moment of tranquility, Raylan pulled out the contents of the diaper bag to see what he had to work with. He found a pacifier and placed it on the blanket.
"Gonna need that," he said out loud.
Three pairs of what looked to be cotton Long Johns, three dresses, a pack of three Onesies, sleep blankets, bibs, pacifiers, a feeding dish and spoon, plenty of clean bottles, a bottle brush, a thermometer, Infant Tylenol, a comb and brush, a package of eight pairs of socks, a couple of story books, and a sweater. Raylan lobbed the wearable blankets into the crib and stacked the clothes and placed them in the bottom dresser drawer, along with the supplies, except for the bowl and spoon and the pacifiers. He figured her dinner would be next on their agenda.
He heard grunting coming from Willa and glanced down. She was no longer up on her forearms but struggling to keep her head up. She appeared to be tiring. Remembering what Winona had written about smothering, he grabbed her and brought her up on his lap.
"That Tummy Time is a work out, huh?" he asked, handing her the carrot toy.
She was content, but drooling. He wiped her mouth with his sleeve.
"What's a little slobber between kin?" he asked.
Over the next couple of hours, Raylan fed her some solid food and ordered himself room service. Then, he gave her a bath in the sink, where she had a great time splashing a lot of the water out of the sink and onto his clothes. He put a clean diaper on her and, with a bit of maneuvering, managed to put her into a Onesie and a sleep sack, just as Winona instructed. Then, he warmed her a bottle and found a bottle for himself in the mini bar … some Kentucky Bourbon to sip on.
He read to Willa from Good Night Moon, as he fed her the bottle, burping her when she was halfway through just as Art had instructed. She smelled good after her bath, and she snuggled in close to his chest and was out before her bottle as empty. Slowly and carefully, he placed her on her back and dimmed the light.
After his little drink, he couldn't believe how tired he was. Pleased with how easy the evening went, he toed off his boots and stretched out in the bed, asleep himself a soon as his head hit the pillow.
Sometime later, Raylan was startled awake by Willa's sharp cry, "Waaaaaaaaaaaaahhh!"
"What? Huh?" Waking from a dead sleep to the unfamiliar sound, Raylan bolted upright in bed. He ran a hand through his hair and swung his legs over the side of the bed, inching his way toward the sound in his bare feet.
Willa's eyes were scrunched tight and her mouth wide open. Her sobs disintegrated into hiccups, then resumed. Raylan bent over and picked her up, holding her to his chest.
"Shhh. Shhh," he murmured. "You're gonna wake up the whole hotel." His daughter, it seemed, had quite a pair of lungs. It had to be the middle of the night. Walking back toward his bed, bouncing Willa in his arms, he glanced at the clock.
"9:15? It's only 9:15?!" He looked down at the still fussing baby. "Your mama told me you were a good little sleeper." He wondered if Winona had fibbed or if the change in environment or something else was behind Willa's upset.
He stuck a finger into the diaper. Nope, it's not that.
Big tear drops were coming from the baby's blue eyes and splashing on her reddened cheeks. She cried and cried and was becoming warm.
"Oh, shit," Raylan was beginning to worry she was sick.
He pulled out his cell and dialed Art. The phone rang and rang until the call was picked up by voice mail.
"Yeah, this is Raylan," he began to leave a message. "I'm sure you can hear the baby screamin' in the background. You oughta hear it from here. So much for you bein' there if I need you."
After he disconnected the call, he called Alison and, once again, he reached only her voice mail. Frustrated, he tried it again by calling Rachel, only to receive the same result.
Finally, he dialed Tim, who answered the call on the first ring with, "Rachel bet you'd be callin' me, next."
"Well, I tried callin' Art, but he wouldn't pick up."
"Oh, you didn't hear the latest," Tim shared. "Art got called into a budget meeting in St. Louis this afternoon. He's in the air as we speak." After a beat, he added, "So, what's wrong with Willa?"
"I dunno," he said, standing in a wide stance, rocking the screaming infant back and forth. "I can't get her to quit crying. She's not wet, and I just fed her."
"Maybe she's lonely?" Tim guessed.
"She's chewin' on her fingers, droolin' like nobody's business," Raylan reported.
"Do you think maybe she's teething?" Tim asked.
"D'ya think?" Raylan was serious. "Winona left me some Tylenol, but she also made me scared to use it."
There was a silence from Tim until he said, "You got some bourbon? I remember my cousin rubbed bourbon on his kid's gums, and it worked like a charm. I know I'd feel a whole lot better if someone would rub bourbon in my mouth."
"I drank it all," Raylan confessed. "There was some in the mini bar I had earlier this evenin'."
"Hmmm, another woman drivin' you to drink? Maybe you could get some more from the Front Desk," Tim suggested.
"At their prices for a little bitty bottle the size of an airline bottle, I'd do better goin' to the liquor store."
"Then, what's keeping you?" Tim asked. "Hey, how about I meet you for breakfast in the morning before I come into work? You're close by, and I hear your hotel has a mean breakfast buffet."
"I could meet you," Raylan answered, as he shoved his feet in his boots. Grabbing the diaper bag, his gun, and the card key, he headed out the door holding tight onto Willa. "All dependin' on if we can get some sleep." Then, he had a thought. "Could ya' run by my place and bring me a change of clothes? The ones in my Go Bag in the trunk are dirty."
"I'm sure I could, but how do I get in?"
"It's not much of a lock." Raylan admitted.
"So, you're suggesting I pull a B&E?"
"A credit card oughta do it." All the LEOs knew that trick.
After disconnecting the call, Raylan and his wailing baby girl headed to the elevators. He pushed the button. The sudden change of scenery changed Willa's screams into muffled whimpers. After waiting for what seemed to be an eternity for the elevator, he decided to take the stairs.
"C'mon, Willa. You're about to patronize your first liquor store," he explained. "But don't let me catch you in one again until you're like … thirty."
(To be continued . . .)