Chapter 3: Just Close Your Eyes And Sing
"When a singer truly feels and experiences what the music is all about, the words will automatically ring true."-Monserrat Caballe
" So let me get this straight, MJ, THE MJ specifically requests you to be his waitress tonight, and the psycho Joseph threw a drink at you, then you quit?" Olivia asks, as she sits across from me on the couch. I nod as I brush my freshly washed hair, smirking at her.
" Well, I quit after I commented on Joseph's half-assed face lift," I say, laughing when her face drops in disbelief.
" Are you insane?" she asks, throwing a pillow at me which I catch easily tossing it back at her.
" What he had it coming. I tolerated a lot working at The Whisper, but having someone throw a drink in my face just kind of sent me over the edge," I say, tossing my brush onto the end table with a slight clinking sound. " Though now that I think of it, I don't know what I'm going to do. Without a job I cant pay tuition, or rent, not to mention," I'm cut off mid-rant when Olivia grabs my right wrist running her thumb over my leather bracelet.
" Where did you find it?" she asks, and I look at her smiling softly.
" I didn't find it, it kind of found me," I reply, instantly remembering the feel of MJ's hands on mine when he returned it to me. How strange it was, when most physical contact from the opposite sex has me cringing, his soothed me. I snap out of my momentary trip down memory lane jumping up from the couch.
" What are you doing?" she asks, and I just shake my head and hold up a hand while I search through my purse finally finding the piece of paper I was searching for.
" I have something for you," I say, handing her the paper before curling back up on the couch.
" What is this?" she asks, her eyes going wide once she realizes what it is, " Oh MY GOD! No way, you did this for me?" I nod when she tackles me the paper that MJ had so graciously signed for her clenched tightly in her hand. " You are so amazing, oh my God, Brooke you're the best friend a girl could ask for." I fall to the floor in hysterical laughter when she dances around the room screaming 'I can die a happy woman.'
I sit on my bed a few hours later, trying to figure out just what it is that I am going to do. I could always try and find another job, but if Joseph is as powerful as I have a feeling that he is, I would have better luck finding someone sun bathing in Antarctica, than finding another job in Los Angeles. I pick up my cell phone bill, groaning when I read the balance.
" Knock, knock," Olivia's sing song voice calls through the door and before I can tell her to go away she sails into my room.
" Your all dressed up, hot date?" I ask, picking up my scattered bills, shoving them into a drawer.
" Yeah, with you. Your going to get your cute butt into the shower, get all dolled up, and then we are going out," Olivia says, dragging me off the bed shoving me into my bathroom.
" Liv, I don't feel like going out, in case you forgot, I don't have a job anymore, I need to save all of my money," I groan as I turn around to look at her.
" I don't want to hear it, in the shower now," she says, grinning at me as she closes the door in my face. I roll my eyes as I snap the water on and undress. Since when is it illegal for a girl to mourn the loss of her job? I sigh as I step into the shower, no sense in fighting with her about it, when she makes up her mind there is no way out of it. Unfortunately.
" Brooke are you ready yet?" Olivia asks, and I roll my eyes as I stare into the mirror. I pull at my baby pink shirt readjusting my acid wash jeans. I turn around quickly mustering a smile.
" Does this look okay?" I ask, running my hands over my stomach.
" You look awesome, now lets go, we don't want to be late," she says grabbing my hand as she pulls me towards the front door.
" What do you mean 'we don't want to be late,'" I ask, as I follow behind her.
" You'll see," she says, starting the car turning up the radio before I have the time to question her further.
I sit in the car staring at The Acoustic Playhouse, my heart hammering in my chest.
" Olivia, what did you do?" I ask, my voice barely a whisper as I twirl my bracelet around my wrist nervously.
" I am giving you the push you need. Do you remember, when we were in the ninth grade?" she asks and I nod my head slowly, " Health class. When we had to do that stupid assignment about where we saw ourselves ten years from now? You said you saw yourself as the next big singing sensation. You gave up that dream Brooke, and its time you take it back. Now that you don't have a job, you have the time to pursue your real dream." I shake my head sadly, trying to gain control over myself.
" Liv, I love you, but I cant," I say, my stomach turning at the idea of being on stage in front of so many people.
" Yes you can, and you will," she says, pushing out of the car walking to my door pulling it open. " You'll thank me for this someday." I sigh as I trudge behind her, this can't be happening.
I stand in the crowd blind and deaf to everything that is going on around me. The roar of blood in my head and pounding of my heart too loud to concentrate. I'm snap back to reality when the m.c for the night takes the microphone.
" All right give it up for Ryan," he says, and I clap my hands with everyone else, " Next up is Brooke." my heart rolls sickly in my chest as I start backing away from the crowd searching for the easiest way to get out of the stifling closeness of the club.
" Oh no you don't, you made it through the door, you can do this Brooke," Olivia says pushing me towards the stage, " Just close your eyes and sing." I walk towards the stage, my heart pounding so harshly that I feel like I'm going to vomit. I walk onstage picking up the guitar with shaky hands, sliding the strap over my shoulder with my back still turned to the crowd. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Olivia was right, I sang before I spoke a single word. Music is in me and it's what I love. What's the worst that could happen. 'You could get booed off the stage,' my inner voice echoes in my head and I cringe. True, but I'll never know if I don't try. I turn around holding my breath as I adjust the microphone stand. 'Just close your eyes and sing,' Olivia's soothing voice echoes in my head. I start strumming the familiar chords the music taking over as I open my mouth.
Strumming my pain with his fingers, Singing my life with his words, Killing me softly with his song, killing me softly,With his song telling my whole life With his words, Killing me softly,With his song
I heard he sang a good song, I heard he had a style, And so I came to see him and listen for a while. And there he was this young boy, stranger to my eyes, Strumming my pain with his fingers, Singing my life with his words,Killing me softly with this song, killing me softly,With his song, telling my whole life, With his words, Killing me softly with his song. I felt all flushed with fever, Embarrassed by the crowd, I felt he found my letters then read each one out loud. I prayed that he would finish, But he just kept right on- Strumming my pain with his fingers, Singing my life with his words, Killing me softly with his song, Killing me softly With his song, Tellin' my whole lifeWith his words, Killing me softly, with his song wooahhh...woooooahh...la la la la la la ...wooooah.. laaaaahhh... woooah..laaaaahhh Ah ah Ah ah Ah ah Ah Strumming my pain with his fingers, yes he was Singing my life with his words, killing me softly with his song, Killing me softly with his song,
Telling my whole life with his words,
Killing me softly with his song.
I count my heart beats when a sudden burst of applause has my eyes flashing open a nervous smile painting my lips.
" Th, thanks," I stammer setting the guitar down to rush off stage as quickly as I can. I brace one hand on my knee as I press a hand to my stomach.
" Oh my God, Brooke, that was amazing," Olivia squeals as she throws her arms around me. I smile as I hug her tightly my body shaking.
" That, that was so exhilarating," I say, bubbling laughter escaping my lips. Olivia and I stand laughing together when someone clears their throat behind us. I look up my eyes widening when I recognize who stand not five feet from me. MJ stands, a black button up shirt rolled up to his elbows, slightly baggy blue jeans laying low on his hips, a black fedora pulled low on his head. I smile slightly, turning Olivia around.
" Brooke what are you do-" she trails off, a small gasp of surprise finishing her sentence. " Oh my, oh wow, it's MJ." I smile, taking her hand in mine leading her the two steps it takes to be standing closer to him.
" What are you doing here?" I ask, my voice slightly raising over the loud humming noise of the music pulsating through the club.
" I like coming to places like this, in search of inspiration," MJ says, and I smile nodding my head. I bump Olivia's shoulder with mine trying to shake her from her apparent comatose state.
" I love," she stammers, blush immediately painting her cheeks as she shakes her head.
" I love you too," MJ murmurs, his voice barely audible. " Listen, I have to go, but I really want to talk to you about something Brooke. I feel horrible for what Joseph did to you, and the fact that you quit your job, can I get your number?" I stare at him blankly until Olivia takes initiative.
" Of course you can," she says, taking MJ's cell phone punching in my number. " Thanks, I'll call you tomorrow," he murmurs, slipping away into the crowd.
" I cant believe this, I just met MJ. Brooke, can you believe this?" Olivia asks, and I shake my head as we push through the crowd. No, I cant believe it, any of it.