Jungle World: Coma
-I-
Blackness; empty nothingness. Was this death? He didn't know.
The blackness fade into noise, then movement, then into agony. . . Oh, why did it hurt so? The whole universe was nothing but pain, noise, and movement. This was worse than death. The roar around him became deafening, the ground shaking and every movement summoning ever-increasing waves of anguish. As suddenly as the tumult began, it stopped, leaving agony as his only companion. Death couldn't hurt this bad. He felt the blackness returning and welcomed the respite; at least there was no pain there.
-II-
In the bouncing and crowded shuttle, Jack and a few of her best biotic students sit with the S&R team heading to the Citadel ruins. Jack is running the past few hours through her head; The sudden ending of the war, The red plasma wave and Reapers falling over "dead", Then learning that Shepard was MIA but presumed still on the Citadel, and her arguing with Admiral Hackett to let her onto this team.
Shepard and Jack had a rocky past; he was always the damn-boy-scout when she wanted to kick-ass-and-take-no-bullshit, but she had to admit, Shepard got the job done his way too. They worked well together. She respected Shepard and though she'd kill anyone who would say it aloud, she had a bit of a crush on him. He had pulled her ass out of the fire on Grissom Academy, now it was time for her to return the favor. Looking Rodriquez and Prangley in the eyes, she tried to calm herself.
Rodriquez and Prangley could see Jack was agitated and they both knew she had been with Commander Shepard on the Collector Base mission. Somehow the Commander had pulled his entire squad out of what should have been a suicide mission. This time it didn't look like he was so lucky, but they owed it to him to try. Hell, the entire galaxy owed him. Rodriguez looked over at Prangley then back to Jack and all three nodded in unison.
Jack getting her agitation under control, "All right people, here's the deal. Shepard's last known position was somewhere at, or near, the top of the Citadel tower. So that's where we're going to start our search." Every eye in the cabin was on her, "We don't know what shape that part of the Citadel will be nor what Shepard's condition is, so time is of the essence but don't be a dumb-ass. We're here to rescue Shepard not become a casualty." She caught one of the med-team members a Lt Jensen rolling her eyes. "What the fuck is that look Jensen?"
Lt. Jensen was not new to S&R and EMT teams. In her ten years of this work, she'd seen people survive in some of the worst conditions, but this? No way. This was a gesture, otherwise they'd send more than one shuttle to look for him. Looking at Jack levelly she said, "We should be looking for survivors, Ma'am. For all we know.."
"What the fuck do you think you know? We are here 'Looking for survivors' Jensen, the most important survivor for this whole damn war!" Jack was fighting to contain her anger and could feel her implants buzzing, "Is that clear Jensen?"
The look on Jack's face and the biotic glow told her that Jack still expected Shepard to be alive. Well, she'd learn soon enough, no use arguing about it right now. "Yes, ma'am" in a little over-forced voice but Jack's biotic glow ceased.
Keeping her signature "Evil Eye" on Jensen, she continued with the mission Hackett had assigned her, "We're here to assist the med team by clearing debris and protecting them if any hostiles remain." The shuttle had finally exited Earth's atmosphere and the shuttle ride became smooth and quiet.
The overhead buzzed, "Landing in two minutes." came the pilots sharp voice. The pilot noting numerous shuttles heading to locations all over the Citadel.
Jack looked at everyone one more time, "All right get your asses ready, remember no stupid bullshit." With that, everyone starts their final equipment checks and fastening their helmets to suit hardpoints.
-III-
The peaceful blackness was interrupted by a sound, a noise that got louder and louder, finally resolving into words, "There he is!" Pain followed the voices. "I've got vitals! They're weak, we don't have much time." Another voice loud, but familiar somehow, "Two of you fuckers help me lift this beam. Now!" Fresh stabs of pain crash over him. Why wouldn't they just leave him alone to float in the blackness?
"Get him on the stretcher" More footsteps approach then more noises that should be familiar yet weren't. "This should hold him while we get him into the shuttle." A cold numbness takes the edge off the pain, then a sense of movement as a strangely familiar noise arrives. The numbness continues to spread as the inky blackness reclaims him again.
Lt Jensen applied more medi-gel to Shepard as soon as they loaded him onto the shuttle. The bleeding slowed again but did not stop. Shepard looked so pale and broken, Jack was speechless. She was no stranger to combat wounds, even as as adept, she'd seen her share of close-quarters combat. As the shuttle shuddered and began to lift Jack could hear the pilot on the radio getting instructions to head to the SSV Argentina.
-IV-
Pain and blackness no longer defined his world. Death must have him now as he finds himself in a floating and weightless world filled with a cloudy hazy light. Indistinct noises begin to penetrate his new domain yet pain remains absent. Shapes begin to form out of the haze and the noise takes shape into a voice, "Oh God, look at him." Who said that? He should know that voice but could not recall. The question is quickly forgotten as Anderson's face forms from one of the hazy shapes. Anderson smiles and turns to look at him and in sync with the unknown-yet-familiar voice Anderson says, "I'm proud of you son. You did good." Anderson then fades back into the haze as the noises recede yet again.
As the door closes, she continues looking through the glass window at her son, "Is he going to make it Doctor?" Rear Admiral Hannah Shepard asks with concern afraid of the answer yet needing to know.
Chief Medical Officer Davis of the SSV Argentina looks at her and says with a practiced tone, "It was touch and go and we're not out of the woods yet Admiral. We had to amputate below his left knee and his L5 implants may be burned out, but it's too early to tell for sure." Turning his head and returning his gaze to the Commander, he continues, "He's got first and second degree burns all over his body and even some third degree burns on his face and hands. His eyes were also damaged in the blast so He may need eye implants. Finally, he remains in a coma and floats in and out of REM sleep."
With her time in the service, this wasn't the first time she lost someone close to her. Years ago she and Shepard lost her husband, but this was unlike any other loss she ever endured. She willed with all her power for Alan to recover. She expelled a long, shaky breath, "Will he ever wake up?" struggling to maintain her authoritative tone as she dabbed at her eyes with a tissue.
Dr Davis returns his gaze to her, "Frankly, at this time, we just don't know. It's a miracle he survived at all Admiral and as I told you yesterday, few could have survived the trauma he endured. The next few days and weeks will be telling."
Next to Shepard a monitor began to blink REM SLEEP.
Out of the fuzzy haze Kaidan's face appeared. His brown eyes hard, "I just want to know, is the person I followed to hell and back–the person that I loved–are you still in there… somewhere?" As he reaches out a hand to touch Kaidan the haze reclaimed him, Kaidan was gone. Shepard is alone and his heart breaks.
-V-
Light years away, Kaidan is in a restless sleep. "We're old soldiers you and I. We both know the score, this is goodbye." Kaidan woke with a jerk, dreaming of his last semi-private moments with Shepard at the London FOB. Lighting and rain continuing to fall outside the Normandy.
The debate echoing in his head resuming, the same questions and non-answers has been plaguing him for days, "Would Shepard have fought harder to survive if I hadn't planted that seed of doubt?" No. . . Yes. . . Maybe. . . FUCK! "What the hell was I thinking saying that to Alan?!" Way to fuck up Alenko! You dumbass!
His heart still racing in his chest he takes a deep shaky breath as he sits up. Angry at himself. Angry at the universe for taking away his love. Just. . . Angry. The sound of the rain and thunder a fitting accompaniment to his mood. Lighting fills the room with strobing light and his eye catches the picture of Shepard he was looking at last night. Putting his head in his hands he tries to hold back the sobs taking several deep breaths trying to get control of his emotions.
After a few minutes he calms and stands up alone in Shepard's cabin, unintentionally sleeping up here again. The hot humid air in the room making him sweaty and thirsty. Activating his Omnitool to light his way, noting the time, one he was becoming all too familiar with; 0300 hours. Entering the bathroom to relieve himself, then turning to the sink to rinse his hands and fill a glass with water. Drinking the water in gulps he quickly emptied the cup and gets a refill.
Walking back toward the bed, he knows he isn't getting enough sleep, and it is eating away at his self-control. Desperate, he tries an old meditation technique he learned years ago as a means of managing his migraines. After several frustrating minutes, his mind finally clears and Kaidan falls asleep to the sound of rain hitting the Normandy's battered hull.