Alexis.
This day has gone from bad to worse, having Luke chasing after me in the Metro Court yelling out "Natasha, Natasha" was how I started my morning. I wanted some peace, some quiet and a really nice breakfast but with Spencer around that wasn't likely to happen at all.
I stopped of course because he's Luke and I'm by all accounts his Natasha. I never correct him to call me Alexis, because well I know he wouldn't listen but also it gives some odd sense of comfort.
A reminder, than I am Natasha Cassadine.
And right now, Ric Lansing is about to meet her for the first time. He knows Alexis Davis, he's never met Natasha. The Cassadine, the cold-calculating woman that could murder Helena if she wanted to. If Ric thinks his brother is all dark and mean, he's not seen anything yet.
As I reach my home and drop on my couch, resting my weary head in my hands. I can't help but feel sick looking around. Knowing what transpired here in this room between my husband and my daughter.
Cheat on me once, fool on me. Cheat on me twice, fool on you. I will not roll over this time, not when he found the one weakness I had. My daughter and used her in a disgusting way against me in my own freaking house. I am under no duress to forgive him, I'm done. He'll be done.
Sam's my child and we are family. I will have to forgive her, but Ric? I owe him nothing.
When I look up I notice an envelope sitting on my desk, with my name nicely scrawled on the front. I can tell it's my daughter's hand-writing from afar. I hesitate on opening it; I hesitate on wanting to hear anything from her. But she's my child and I can't resist.
Alexis,
I know I'm the last person you want to see or hear from. I know that I have ruined our family and your trust in me forever. I just, I just had to say that I am sorry. I was angry; I was hurt at you, at Jason, at my life. I lashed out wanting to hurt you and him in one swoop and Ric was there to help me accomplish that.
I was self-destructing and I wanted everyone to self destruct and feel the same pain around me and it was hurtful and cruel and I wish I could take it back but I can't. I just want you to know, I'll never forgive myself. For what I've done to you, to your marriage and to my sisters and even myself.
I know this is late coming, but you were right. About Jason, about my mob life, about it all, you were right. It took me hitting rock bottom to realize that. I am going to put my life back together. A stronger and independent woman who believes in herself and someone that may be one day, you could be proud of and may be forgive me. That's all I've ever wanted.
A family's love.
Sam.