Every day at camp, the kids all went to the pool. Today, the Eds stood around a blackboard where Edd was forming his latest tactics to escape from the Kankers. "Okay, here's the plan..."

Ed raised his hand. "Why are the hills alive with the sound of music?"

"CAN IT, LUMPY!" yelled Eddy. Ed and Eddy began to fight. Edd scratched the blackboard to get their attention. "AHEM! As I was saying, we need to hide from the Kankers," he held up a map of the pool. "As you can see, we come out HERE and the Kankers come out THERE."

"SO WHAT?" yelled Eddy.

"Must-see TV!" added Ed.

Edd sighed and threw the map away. "What I'm saying is that we have no hope with the Kankers."

"Woo-hoo!" Eddy said sarcastically. "We're dead."

"I hate my life," moaned Edd. Jason zoomed over. "Hey, fellow nerd! What's wrong?"

"Those Kankers get us every time..."

Jason smiled. "Not if I can help it! I have a secret weapon!" He held up Quincy.

Calvin was the next to inspire him. "Come on, Double D! Those stupid sisters have been bugging you for a long time! Give them what they deserve!"

"And what do they deserve?" asked Hobbes.

"Not now, Hobbes! I'm inspiring him!" Calvin stepped out of the locker room and headed towards the pool. "Today is the day, Hobbes!"

"When you stop coming up with stupid plans?"

"I refuse to answer that! Today's the day when I swim in...THE DEEP END!"

"THE DEEP END?" gasped Hobbes.

"Yes, THE DEEP END!"

Dramatic music played. There was pause. Finally, Hobbes said, "Well, let's get going!" Calvin and Hobbes ran over to the pool. They passed by the Kankers, chasing the Eds.

"C'mon, boys!"

"You know you love us!"

"Surrender now an' I'll go easy on ya, Double D!"

"Someone help us!" screamed Edd.

Jason jumped down from out of nowhere. "Never fear, Quincy is here!"

"You think some stupid lizard is gonna stop us?" laughed Lee.

"He's so dumb!" giggled May. The Kankers laughed. Linus snuck up behind them. "Normally, I hate violence, but I'm sure that everyone has snapped once and again..." He whipped them in the butt with his blanket, knocking them into the pool.

Jason gasped in horror. "Linus! I've never seen you like this! I LOVE IT!" Jason threw Quincy into the pool and the Kankers screamed. "We'll get you for this!"

"Yeah! When we get out of the pool..."

"We can stay in the pool! We got the chameleon!"

"He's an iguana!" yelled Jason. "Come on, this better not become a running gag! It's not even funny!"

Marie threw Quincy across the pool into the deep end.

"I'LL SAVE YOU, QUINCY!" yelled Jason, taking off after the sinking iguana.

Calvin was also heading for the deep end, when Hobbes stopped him. "Hey, wait! I just remembered! You can't swim!"

"Fine! Rub it in! I almost learned! Remember?"

"Oh no...a flashback!"

"Mom signed me up to swimming lessons!" Calvin remembered. "It was horrible!"

"I hate this!" Calvin had said as he walked into his swimming lessons. "Here I am, freezing my buns off a 9 in the morning, about to jump in an oversized bathtub full of iced water and drown! The only thing that could possibly make this worse would be if my class was..." Calvin turned around to see Rosalyn. "...TAUGHT BY MY SADISTIC KID-HATING BABYSITTER!" He quickly jumped into defense mode. "Let me say that this isn't my house! It's a whole new territory! I can do lots of things to you! Both your body and mind are in my powerful hands!"

"But over fifty percent of this area is water, and you're forgetting that you can't swim," reasoned Rosalyn. "Since I can, I have the advantage!"

"Oh...she's good."

"Okay, everyone in the water!" she called.

"I refuse!" Calvin said stubbornly. "I'm freezing as it is! If I do get in, I have to go very slowly! Otherwise, the shock would kill me!"

"I see," Rosalyn said calmly. "Calvin, do you know what a 'rat tail' is?"

"No..."

"It's when you soak a towel and twist it up into a whip. It stings like crazy and is much worse that a little cold water."

"Even sub-zero water like this pool?" Rosalyn cracked the "rat tail." Calvin was soon in the pool. "I always thought that lifeguards were just taught to resuscitate people and things like that. Wait! What if this is all just some insurance scam and she's gonna let us all drown like rats! Oh no!"

Rosalyn got in with the kids. "Okay, first we're going to learn the 'Dead Man's Float.'"

"MOM! HELP! HELP!"

"What I have to put up with to pay for collage..." groaned Rosalyn.

Calvin climbed out of the pool. "I don't want to learn how to swim! I'll just stay on dry land for the rest of my life!"

"What if you fall off a boat?"

Calvin put on a huge life jacket. "No problem."

The flashback was over. "Well, it's the deep end, or your life," said Hobbes.

"Yeah..." sighed Calvin, "I guess I'll stay in the shallow end."

Susie swam by. "Hey, Calvin! Want to swim down to the deep end?"

"Heck no!"

"Chicken."

Jason and Marcus, meanwhile, were hiding Quincy from the Kankers when Calvin ran over. "Jason! You know this place well! Where's the water storage room?"

"Water storage room?" Hobbes said suspiciously. "What are you trying to do?"

Calvin shrugged. "Let most of the water out, so the deep end isn't so deep, what else? Where is it, Jason?"

"The end of the locker room."

Calvin grinned. "Easy stuff."

"The GIRL'S locker room," added Jason.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"If you're gonna do it, hurry up, you only have 15 minutes."

"Oh man!" cried Calvin. "The girls locker room?"

"Give up?" smiled Hobbes, relieved that Calvin wasn't plotting anything. "Good. Let's just play in the shallow end."

The Eds, on the other hand, were still on the run from the Kankers. "Japanese cheese!" yelled Ed.

"Eddy!" cried Edd. "We're not going to live this one!"

"Yes we will!" hissed a determined Eddy. The Eds ran into the safety of the boy's locker room. "Ha! We're safe now! They can't come in the boy's locker room!"

"Never give up, girls!" Lee ordered her sisters. "We're not let in because of our gender!"

"That's not politically correct!" agreed May.

Marcus peeked out of the pool where he and Jason hid from the sisters. "Aren't they taking this TOO far?"

"Nothing's far enough for the Eds!" said Marie. "We're going in!" The Kankers ran inside after the Eds. The Eds turned on all the showers. The Kankers slipped and fell on the wet tiles. They slid across the locker room, but the Eds were gone, having made a hasty escape. Once the dejected Kankers left, the Eds peeked out of a bathroom stall.

"My, the Kankers gave up quickly," said Edd.

They walked to find the Kankers waiting for them. "Let's kiss 'em!"

Calvin sat listening to the Kanker's speech about political correctness. "The Kankers are right!"

"The Kankers are insane," corrected Hobbes.

Calvin jumped up dramatically. "I'm not letting them keep me out of that locker room because of race!"

"Gender."

"That's what I said. Hobbes, it's now or never! We're going into...the girl's locker room!"

"Okay, but if anyone asks, it was YOUR idea."

Soon they made it to the control room. "Here it is...just like Jason said!"

Hobbes looked around, making sure that there was no one around. "We're gonna get in trouble..."

"We are not!" Calvin messed with the controls to drain the water.

"Draining the pool won't help," said Hobbes, rolling his eyes.

"Yes it will!" insisted Calvin.

"The plan may seem good, but you'll just mess it up!"

"Oh, ye of little faith..."

Sarah jumped into the shallow end to hit concrete. The water was gone. "HEY! WHAT GIVES!"

"Some dork ruined the pool!" said Kevin.

The Eds were standing up on the diving board. The Kankers were climbing up the ladder and closing in.

"Double D? I feel moldy."

"Not now, Ed!"

Eddy saw the Kankers reach the top and start to approach them. "We've gotta dive, guys!"

"But there's no water in the pool!" Edd pointed out.

"This must be the work of De-Hi-Drate-Or from 'Attack of the Water Slurppers!' guessed Ed.

"Well, I'm escaping!" Eddy dove in. CRASH! "Ow."

Calvin and Hobbes ran out to find that they had drained the pool too much! Even the deep end had no water! "Uh-oh...BACK TO THE WATER CONTROL ROOM!" The two ran back and turned the water back on high pressure.

The Kankers were taking their time. They knew Ed and Edd had nowhere to go.

"I fear this is the end!" sighed Edd.

"This reminds me of the Robot Monster in---"

"ED! Stop talking about old sci-fi movies! This is real life!"

"Yeah!" agreed Marie, who was inches away. "You can't escape!"

Edd looked down to find that there was water back in the pool. "What? It's a miracle! Dive, Ed!"

They jumped into the pool and splashed under water. Ed bobbed out a few seconds later, riding on a kickboard like a surfboard. He crashed into the wall and was finally grabbed by May.

"Wait!" realized Charlie Brown. "The pool's flooding!"

"Calvin did this!" cried Jason, as the water rose higher and higher

Calvin and Hobbes came out to find everyone glaring at him. "Uh-oh...BACK TO THE---" Calvin was cut off when he was covered with a huge wall of water.

"Uh...UNDER THE SEA! UNDER THE SEA!

"It's the end of the world, Calvin," glared Lucy.

I'll be honest with you. This is probably one of my least favorite stories that I've written. It's also one of the shortest episodes. I just feel that it lacked the humor of the others. Still, it's sort of special, as I'm pretty sure it was the first Camp episode I wrote. Thankfully, the next story is one of my favorites.