Chapter 3:
Kendall, James, and Carlos were all in the living room on the couch. 'Brandon' had just left after dinner was over. Mrs. Knight was now cleaning up the kitchen.
"Brandon seemed like a really nice kid" Mrs. Knight said as she put dishes in the sink.
"Yeah. He seemed pretty cool. A little nerdy but cool" James said.
"I liked him" Carlos said with a smile.
James turned to Kendall. "What about you? You haven't said anything at dinner or at all actually" James said.
"What?" Kendall asked snapping out of his owns thoughts.
"I was wondering what you thought of Brandon" James said.
"Oh" Kendall said. "He's fine" Kendall added looking over at his Mother who smiled.
"Alright boys I have to go grab Katie she went to the movies with Camille. I thought it would have been good for her to get out of the apartment" Mrs. Knight said.
"Bye Mama Knight" James and Carlos said in unison.
Mrs. Knight left the apartment.
"Okay, so what's with lie?" James questioned.
"The lie? There is no lie" Kendall said.
"Yes there was about Brandon" James said.
Kendall sighed. "I don't like him" Kendall stated.
"Why don't you like him?" Carlos asked.
"First off he went into my room without permision and then he just takes and touches things in the room!" Kendall said angrily.
James and Carlos shared worried glances. Kendall didn't like anyone going into his and Logan's 'old' room. He doesn't even go into the room unless he has to.
"Kendall..." James said. "I'm sure he didn't mean anything about it." James continued.
"He was probably just curious" Carlos said.
"I don't care! He doesn't go into other peoples rooms and then touch their things" Kendall said.
"Kendall what did he even touch?" James asked.
"It was nothing" Kendall said standing up angrily James followed suite grabbing Kendall's arm and spinning him around.
"Dude don't walk away from this what's going on? Why are you suddenly so angry?" James asked.
Kendall looked down feeling tears starting to form but held them back.
"Kenny" James said. "Come on man"
"It was Logan's bear" Kendall said.
"What?" Carlos asked.
"He was holding Logan's bear when I came into the room" Kendall said.
"Oh Ken..." James sighed. Realizing what all his anger had been really about.
"I have to go" Kendall said shaking his head before leaving the apartment.
James sighed slowly sitting down on the couch. "Man" he said rubbing the back of his neck.
"I miss Logie" Carlos whispered. James looked at Carlos and wrapped an arm around Carlos's shoulder.
"I do too bud" James said.
They stayed like this for several seconds. James sighed moving around slightly. Carlos lifted his head off his shoulder.
"Where you going?" Carlos asked as James stood up.
"I'm going to talk to Brandon" James said.
"Why?" Carlos asked.
"To make sure he knows that Kendall didn't mean anything by getting mad at him" James said.
"Okay" Carlos nodded.
"Will you be okay here?" James asked.
"Yeah I'll be fine" Carlos said.
James nodded and walked out the door.
–-
Logan sat on the couch in the living room just staring at the wall. Seeing his friends tonight was like a knife in his heart.
Seeing the way they reacted around each other. He could see how much they were hurting by the whole thing.
He just wish he could do something well other then make Kendall mad at him. God he shouldn't have been in the room in the first place! He saw how Kendall acted he should have known he'd have a problem with it.
He sighed when he heard a knock at the door. He stood up and walked over to the door and opened it. Only to see James standing in front of him.
"James" Logan said.
"Hey can we talk?" James questioned.
"Sure come on in" Logan said stepping away from the doorway and leading James in he walked into the apartment and into the living room.
"What's up?" Logan asked.
"I just wanted to talk to you about Kendall." James said.
"Oh" Logan said.
"Look, heard about what happened" James said.
"I'm sorry about that I didn't mean anything about it" Logan said quickly.
"Oh no I'm not mad at you!" James said.
"Your not mad? Why not?" Logan asked. "I would be if I were you" Logan added sititng on the couch James followed.
"I get that you didn't mean anything by it" James said.
"Then why does Kendall think so?" Logan asked.
James sighed. "It's complicated" James said.
"I can handle complicated" Logan said.
"Look, Kendall doesn't mean anything by whatever he said he just really angry" James said.
"Angry? About what?" Logan asked.
"He's angry at the world" James said.
"The world?" Logan questioned. "Why?"
"A few weeks ago our best friend was in a car accident" James said.
Logan looked at James he could see the pain in James's eyes. "What happened to him?" Logan asked softly.
"He didn't make it" James whispered softly Logan could see the tears in his eyes.
"I'm so sorry James" Logan said.
"It's okay you didn't cause it" James said.
Logan nodded.
"Anyway, Kendall really fell apart after his death though he didn't show it we knew he was breaking. He and Logan were so close. They shared a room." James said.
"Oh jeeze I'm stupid" Logan said trying to make everything he's saying convincing.
"You didn't know. I think seeing you in the room just really hurt him. Reminded him of Logan" James said.
"I'm so sorry James I couldn't even begin to think what the three of you have gone through" Logan said.
"It wasn't easy. For a week Carlos wouldn't stop crying he wouldn't he even come out of his room. Kendall was just angry." James said. "I think it's become easier now that times past everyone seems to be getitng back into their normal rutines" James said.
Logan listened closely to James talk. James had been talking about everyone but himself and he could see James was once again trying to be the strong one.
Everyone always thought that Kendall would act like the strong one yeah he would be strong but he'd break sooner or later wheather or not it was anger or sadness he'd break first before James and usually James picked up their pieces.
He could tellhe was doing this right now.
"What about you James?" Logan asked.
"Me?" James asked his voice craking.
"Yeah you. You seem like your talking about everyone but yourself." Logan said.
"I'm fine" James gulped.
"I may not have known you that long but I know that your lying" Logan said.
"I'm fine really...I'm getting over it" James said turning away from him wiping tears from his eyes.
"Are you really getting over it?" Logan asked.
James turned at looked at Logan and shook his head.
"No" he said his voice quivering as tears started to fall.
"James" Logan said pulling James into a close hug.
–-
James didn't know what came over him there was just something about Brandon that made him reveal everything.
So here he was sobbing onto some guys shoulder that he hardly knows. It's really confusing. He didn't even know he had these feelings he had been working on helping everyone else through it that he didn't realize how much he was breaking on the inside.
How much this killed him. That he missed Logan so much! He and Logan were always the closes back in Minnesota it had been James and Logan then Kendall and Carlos. But when they moved to LA they slowly driffted apart and it became Kendall and Logan then James and Carlos as the dynamic teams.
He hated that he let it get that way and now he'll never change it.
"It's okay" Brandon said rubbing his back.
James pulled away wiping his eyes. "I'm sorry" James said
"It's okay. You deserve to cry" Brandon said.
"I've just been worrying about so many other people that I..." James stopped.
"You forgot about yourself?" Brandon asked.
James nodded. "I just miss him so much" James said.
"We're the two of you close?" Brandon asked.
"We never left each other sides" James said.
He could see Brandon smile. "Until La" James then said and Brandon's smile faded.
"What do you mean?" Brandon asked.
"We grew apart. He grew closer to Kendall asking him for help on problems following along with Kendall instead of me" James said. "I kind of lost my little brother to Kendall" James said.
"James I'm sure that's not true" Brandon said.
"I don't see why it wouldn't be I get why he'd want Kendall more then me I wasn't a good friend in the first place" James said.
"Now that can't be ture" Brandon said.
"Yeah well I kissing his girlfriend wasn't a good thing to do" James said. "Not to mention I always dumped him for someone else" James said.
"James Logan probably knew you cared about him and he cared about you" Brandon said.
"I know your right...I just wish I could change things" James said with a sigh,
Brandon nodded. "I understand" he said.
They were quiet for a moment. "I should go" James said looking at the time on his phone.
"Right..." Brandon said.
James stood up walkiing toward the door. Brandon Followed him out.
"Hey thanks for listening to me it helped" James said.
"No problem" Brandon smiled.
James nodded and turned toward the apartment. "James wait" Brandon said suddenly.
"What's up?" James questioned turning around.
"Nothing never mind" Brandon said shaking his head.
"Alright see you later" James said.
"Bye" Brandon said closing the apartment door as James went into the apartment.