Author's Note: It's nice that you guys like reading my stories. Here we go, chapter three….or something.

Disclaimer: I don't own Red vs Blue, would love to work for Rooster Teeth one day though.

Hello Neighbor

As Rowe observed the Blue Base through her binoculars, she noticed a bright blue light flaring from the entrance of the base.

"Do you see it?" Simmons asked.

Rowe zooms out, "Yeah," she replies, "Yeah I do." She turns and continues, "You can tell Sarge if you want."

Simmons nods and then gets onto his radio, "Come in, Sarge, come in." He then zooms in and continues, "We can see Blue base. There's no one around but we can see working on something'. We'll have a look closer and see if we can find anyone but I don't think that there-"

"Hello!" Caboose cheerfully greets as he pops up in front of Simmons.

"Jesus!" Simmons screeched which caused Rowe who at the moment was checking something jumps. She looks up with a worried look but then spots the Blue soldier and his cyan companion. "Don't do that," Simmons finally breathes.

"Hello Simmons, Doctor Rowe," Carrie greets. Rowe with a slightly amused look waves back while Simmons just stares like a deer in the headlights. Carrie continues, "Hey guys. Uh, were you guys coming to attack us? We're kind of kind of busy right now."

"Maybe you could attack us later, maybe like uh, like next week?" Caboose suggests he turns to Carrier to confirm this.

"Yeah," Carrie nods, "Next week should be fine." Simmons, still completely confused, looks over to Rowe for guidance.

Rowe notices this and let's out a sigh as she replies, "We're not attacking you, we're just coming over to spy on you."

"Oh okay," Carrie replies.

Rowe also adds, "Oh, and we're also here to figure out how you got your power turned on."

"Oh you mean the invisible magic, yeah," Caboose replied. Carrie looks over to Caboose to process his response, after a few seconds, Carrie shrugs and returns to her passive gaze at the Red pair.

They both ask, "Can you tell us anything about the power?"

Carrie replies, "It was already on when we got here. Very convenient."

"Do you know how it works?"

"Yes."

Simmons looks to Rowe who tries to tell him no, "Can you te-"

"No."

Rowe rolls her eyes, "Told you."

Simmons tries again, "Can you tell us why?"

Carrie deadpans and once again says, "No."

Rowe then finally adds, "And we're trying to figure out what you're doing."

"Doing?" Caboose and Carrie replied suspiciously, they then glance at each other before they quickly answer, "Nothing."

Caboose continues on, "There's no reason to do anything. Why would we be doing something? We wouldn't, that's why. So we're not." Carrie nods in agreement.

Simmons then asks suspiciously "If you're not doing anything then why are you too busy?"

Carrie whispers, "Uh...Caboose? I don't think they are buying it."

Simmons continues, "You just said we couldn't attack you right now because you were too busy." Carrie and Caboose look over to Rowe for confirmation.

"Don't look at me," she defends, "I just work here."

Carrie calmly replies, " ...I'm going to have to ask you two to leave."

Rowe, now surprised by the turn of events asks, "Why? You are doing something, aren't you?"

Carrie scolds, "Both of you stop being so nosy," she then sarcastically remarks, "Do you want to lose all your spying privileges?"

"No we don-" Rowe tries to argue then stops, "Wait, why would we need spying privileges?" She turns to her partner, "Simmons?"

"Yeah!" Simmons cries, "We don't need spying privileges, we're the enemy! We can spy as damn well as we please!"

Carrie grins, "Well since you are the enemy….Caboose?" Caboose raises his rifle.

*click*

"Hey Caboose….Let's take and easy there okay?" Rowe nervously calls out Simmons just stares as if he is trying to process the events unfolding.

Carrie sternly replies, "We won't kill you guys, but that won't stop us from say….shooting your feet."

"Well, it was a good talk but….." Rowe glances over to Simmons, "Uh, we gotta go….we'll talk later 'k?" She then pulls Simmons, who was still frozen, by the arm, "Come along Simmons."

"Bye bye Doctor Rowe!" Caboose cheerfully calls.

When the pair were out of ear range, Simmons finally says, "What the fuck just happened?"

Rowe shrugged, "We just got chased out of Blue base by Caboose as if he was a Texan with a shotgun chasing some kids off of his lawn."

Simmons sighs, "Whatever, let's just go tell Sarge….Look! There he is right now."

"Why is he looking at the top of the base though?" Rowe ask curiously.

"Hey Sarge!" Simmons calls out.

Sarge looks over to the two, "What did you two find out?"

Simmons mutters, "Well, I know their base isn't running on brain power…..at least half of it isn't anyway."

Sarge cheers, "Excellent, that means Grif can still be used as fuel once we get the generators turned on."

Simmons continues, "Caboose has no idea how their power works, Carrie knows but she won't tell us. She said it was already on when they got there."

"Huh, favoritism. Command always did like them best," Sarge grumbled.

Rowe then add, "They did offer to run us an extension cord if we could find one long enough."

Sarge then puts his foot down and sternly growls, "No way, not falling for that."

Rowe looked slightly amused, "Ha, I totally saw that coming."

"They'd choose just the right moment to cut us off from a valuable resource!" Sarge growled.

"A resource we don't even have access to to begin with!" Simmons exasperatedly cried.

Rowe sighs again, "Simmons, calm down before you have a brain aneurysm."

" That's exactly right," Sarge agreed, "They want to soften us up, and then yank the carpet out from under our feet! No way. Besides, Grif's on his way to figuring out this problem as we speak. Heh heh.""

The two just stare at their leader, Rowe at this point facepalms and groans, "Oh mon Dieu! How am I still surprised by the shit you idiots say?" She then asks, "Where is Grif anyway?" Wondering why no one was answering, she looks up and asks, "Simmons?" Simmons points up and Rowe follows his finger. She looks up and she was shocked at what she saw.

"Sarge?" she asks.

"Yeah Doc?"

"That's Grif right?"

"Who else would it be?" Sarge laughed, "Lopez?"

"Okay," Row then takes a deep breath and then…."WHAT THE FUCK IS HE DOING UP THERE?!" she roared causing both Simmons and Sarge to jump.

"HELP ME DOOOOC!" Grif screamed hysterically.

Simmons then responds with another question, "Why are you surprised at this?"

Sarge stares off at Blue Base, completely ignoring the death glare Rowe was sending, he observes, "I think that blue bolt has something to do with the power and ours isn't working."

"Jesus Chrihihihist!" Grif cried.

"So why didn't you climb up there?" Simmons cries to Sarge.

Sarge incredulously answers, "Me? Afraid of heights. I mean allergic."

Simmons asks in disbelief "You have a fear of heights? Didn't you used to jump out of ships in high orbit during the war?"

"And how do you think I developed that fear? That shit was crazy." Even Rowe seemed calm, most people would be mistaken by Rowe's calm emotionless facial expression, her body movements said otherwise as her hands slowly curled into fists.

"There's a bird up here fucking with me!" Grif cried.

Sarge shouts back, "Quit makin' friends and get up there!"

"Shoo, shoo!"

Simmons then asks, " Sarge, why didn't you just let him use the ladder?" Sarge glances to the right of him and sees the extremely tall ladder propped up against the cliff.

"Uh," Sarge mumbled, "Oh right. I guess we didn't see that before he started up. My bad." At this point, Rowe is physically shaking.

"Goddammit!" Grif cried.

Simmons scratches his head, "How could you miss something that big?"

Sarge shrugs, "Well, what can I say, Simmons. I guess you're a bit more observant than the rest of us."

Simmons snorts, "No kidding." What do potatoes in microwaves and really angry people have in common? They both explode at some point….

"FERME TA GUE-I MEAN, SHUT THE FUCK UP! BOTH OF YOU!" Rowe roared causing both Sarge and Simmons to jump back and yelp. Now panting, she walks up and grabs Sarge by the collar and growls menacingly, "Sarge you have exactly one, ONE minute to get your foot out of your dick unfuck this situation!" She then shoves him and looks back at Grif, but not before adding, "No check that, not your dick, MY dick! You guys are so fucking pathetic that I have managed to grow my own dick and balls!" To emphasize this she proceeds to grab her crotch like that one scene from Full Metal Jacket, or maybe more like Michael Jackson, I'll let you decide.

"Okay, I made it! I'm at the top!" Grif shouted grabbing everyone's attention.

"Whaddaya see?" Sarge shouted.

"What?" Grif shouted back.

"Dumbasses," Rowe called, grabbing their attention, "Radios." She then proceeds to call Grif on her helmet radio. "Grif, can you hear me?"

"Doc?"

"Grif," Rowe continues, "Just try to calm down and tell us, what do you see?"

"What do I see!?" Grif screamed, "I see everything! Because I'm at the top of the fucking world!"

Sarge then gets on the radio and asks, "Can you see the port where to bolt comes out?"

"Yeah, it's right here! But I think it's blocked!"

Sarge continues, "What's blocking it?"

"It looks like a bunch of pieces of a shi-*static*." His mic then cut out due to his screaming.

All three Reds thought he said something else and they all shared looks of disgust before Sarge comments, "...That's disgusting. Who would climb all that way up there just to do that?"

"I said ship-puh!"

The Red's are soon shaken from their previous thoughts and Sarge relies, "Oh right."

"What kind of ship?" asks Simmons.

Rowe deadpans, "Really Simmons?"

"What?" he asks innocently.

"How the fuck should I know? It's in a million pieces! What difference does it make?" Grif cried.

Simmons sheepishly apologizes, "Sorry! I'm just naturally curious."

"I'm gonna spit on you Simmons!"

Rowe facepalms, "Shut up Simmons."

"Shutting up ma'am."

Sarge then turns and asks, "What do you think, Simmons?"

Simmons ponders for a bit, "Mm, it's really hard to say without seeing it, but I guess he could try to clear the blockage. I'm a little concerned though. If he clears it and that bolt goes off, it could kill him."

"That's an excellent thought. And what was the concern you said you had?"

Rowe growled threateningly, "I want him down alive. You don't want to know what I'm going to do to you if he dies."

"Of course Doc Rowe!" Sarge cheerfully responds, of course, he also had his fingers crossed.

Simmons then asks curiously, "Why can't we use the ladder?"

"Well….we can't actually move it," Sarge mumbles slightly embarrassed.

"What do you mean Sarge?" Simmons asks.

Sarge wearily glances at Rowe, "It takes all four of us to accurately move it since it's so big, if ity falls over we'll never be able to pick it up again since you said Caboose is busy."

"My order-er suggestion….my suggestion still stands Sarge." She then shrugs, "I mean, you are still in charge, you don't have to get him back down alive. Though be aware if you don't, I'm always fumbling with things….like grenades…." Rowe looks down with disappointment, "It would be horrible if one accidentally went off and killed our….great, amazing, and fearless NCO."

Sarge nervously replies, "Heh heh, um…..Noted, I'll….I'll take that into consideration."

Author's Note: That's another chapter posted, probably it's either crappy or not. Oh, and if anyone is wondering why Rowe is speaking French, she's half Cajun if that means anything to you. Anyways, thank you all for reading and remember….Big Brother is watching….