Red Star Country: Alpatraum!
Well, well, well, if it isn't my old nemesis…..READER!!
I know you've been plotting against me; you cannot hide it any longer! I know what you want…….and you're not getting it from me, you hooligans! I WILL NOT GIVE UP PETE. He's MINE I created him from leftover snail shells, damn it!
And thank to reviewers once again. You know who you are~. And thank to Hetalia for being awesome, Hoshi for being created by me, Italy for being naked a lot, my grandma for making me sugar cookies when I visit, etc.
Also, I noticed I use a lot of dialogue…..well…..shut up. :D
Disclaimer: I own EVERYTHING~~~~ *shot*.
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Operation Sealand-kun!
Ah, peaceful beaches.
Pete sighed, content, as he lounged on the crystal white sand of the nicest beach on Alpatraum; Sandy Neck [1]. An uncharacteristic smile was gracing Pete's mug, sending the native creations away, out of fear of the unknown bliss.
Ah, peace.
"Petey! Oi, Pete-tan!"
Ah, anger. It's back~.
"What, Hoshi?" Pete gritted his teeth, irritated. He flung off his "peace shades", and tossed them in the sand.
"Look, look! I started writing a national anthem we can sing before meals, and special holidays! ~" she beamed.
Hoshi handed them a yellow peace of parchment, "Why do you always write in crayon? It's illegible!"
"Nya!" she snatched it back, I'll read it! Bunny Pete!"
"Ehem." She coughed, "Strawberries, strawberries, oh so sweet. Red and round and nice to eat~."
"Why is our anthem about strawberries?" Pete deadpanned.
"Because it's our main export, remember? ~" she grinned.
"And why does it have the "ABC's" melody?"
"Cuz its cat-chy!!" Hoshi huffed, "They have power, and cruel little voices. Saying, "I run the world, you have no choices" ~"
"………" Pete twitched.
"Pretty but mean and slightly obscene." She finished, "These treats are the last thing you'll se~""
"That……is the worst song…..EVER! It has NOTHING to do with Alpatraum anyway!" Pete scowled.
Hoshi flinched at his harsh words. What right did he have to diss her anthem? The anthem she worked so hard on!?
"Stupid Bunny Pete! I worked hard on it!" she whimpered.
"Listen, Hoshi." He started, seriously, "This is World War II; that means, instead of writing a meaningless anthem, you should start developing a battle plan. Make alliances, pin point the enemy, hire soldiers, all that."
He handed Hoshi a thick, black book, titled, How to Successfully Join a War (for Dummies). She looked at him, confused, and started nibbling on the side of the spine. Pete smacked her head up, leaving a trail of drool from her mouth to the spine.
"Ow…." She pouted, "I don't want to read."
But she did. With one more vicious leer from the lieutenant, she trotted off, with Pete strolling behind.
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"Chapter One: Knowing your Enemy"
There is no "war" without a general enemy. So, who is your enemy? To start the sparks, try taking over some of their land; by doing so, they will know you mean business. They will try to reclaim it right away, but don't give in. This is the start of war.
"…….Pete…..who's our enemy?" Hoshi asked.
"We don't have one."
Hoshi had the novel placed on her lap, sitting atop the Greek style arch that crossed over the river, which parted the island. Pete was sitting by its shore; in the center of Roogoo.
Pete rolled up a design of a war plane he had been experimenting with, and tossed it into one of the unoccupied houses. Hoshi watched it tumble through the window, disappearing from view. She wondered how many scraps Pete had thrown into her houses.
"Just make one up." He grunted.
"Uhm……that England guy…." She wondered aloud, "I didn't like him much….."
"Then that's your enemy."
"Alrighty~" Hoshi grinned, and flipped to the back.
She wrote, "Hoshi's War Plans~" in curly script. Underneath, she bulleted, "Main enemy: Limey."
"Where should I invade?" she asked.
"Sealand of course. It's supposedly a "country" now, but still connected to England. It should stir him up."
"Uh huh…" she noted, "How should I invade?"
"Why don't you take that sea cow that's been floating along the border?"
"Huh, I haven't named her yet…."
Without another word, Hoshi hopped off the bridge, leaving for Sealand, along with the magnificent sea cow……Donna.
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Some may not be familiar with the historical reference of Sealand.
Sealand was originally am English sea fort, in the North Sea, during World War II. After the war, England discarded him as part of his territory, leaving him self-regulating. With his new found independence, Sealand decided himself that he was a nation, but no other countries really acknowledge him as one. Either way, England still saw him as his "little brother", and a part of him.
Which was perfect, since Sealand was puny and easy to kidnap, most likely. Easier than Italy? Not likely.
"Ah, the oceeeean~" Hoshi hummed, "So…..blue….and deep….."
"Moooo~" Donna agreed from under her.
The sun was high in the sky, sending a glimmer across the surface of the North Sea. The sun's rays happened to also make its way to a certain metal fort…..
"Sealand! Yargh!" Hoshi chuckled, "Hey, Moo cow, let's be pirates…."
"Moooooooo", which probably means "yargh" in cow.
*please stand by for quick costume change*
Skipping ahead……..
Was a very confusing scene…...
"Yo ho ho, and a bottle of rum~" Hoshi hummed, "I've found myself a scurvy land lubber!"
Sealand stared wide-eyed up at the "pirate captain" Hoshi. She had changed the traditional Alpatraum uniform to a more savage look. The long sleeved shirt's sleeves had been torn to her shoulder, and the star had a skull face over two swords. Her jean skirt had excess thread hanging from it, over red and black stripe socks over the usual combat boots. Triumph oozed her toothy grin; her pink hair was let loose from the small pony, and was restrained by a (comically) large pirate hat; her bangs hung loosely over an eye patch.
"W-who are you!?" Sealand growled in annoyance, which wasn't that scary since he was small and in a uke [2] sailor uniform.
Hoshi frowned, tipping the musketeer esque sword closer to Sealand's chin, "You're shorter than I expected......."
"HEY!" he exclaimed. "I gained TWO MILLIMETERS over the year!"
"Big. Deal." she huffed, slicing his hat in two. He flinched backwards.
"Listen here, Chibisuke [3], I'm known around these waters, as the great pirate, Captain Red Star! And I'm here to kidnap you~"
"Big brother England won't let you get away with this!" he gulped.
"That's what I'm hoping for, Shota-chan [4]."
She withdrew her sword, lifting Sealand up onto her shoulder, potato sack style. Fleetingly, before his small population (though bigger than hers) discovered his absence, Hoshi leaped off the small nation, onto the back of the waiting sea cow.
"What is it that pirates say in victory, Sealand-kun?" Hoshi asked, tying him to one of Donna's horns.
"Uh........."
"Aw, yes! [CENSORED :D] YEAH!!!!" she shouted.
"THAT'S AMERICAN!" he cried.
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Dearest Arthur~
I just wanted to tell you I stole you're Sealand guy. And I refuse to give him up! (I'm giving you the finger right now, but you can't see).Unless, you meet this list of demands:
Relinquish all of you're vanilla tea to Alpatraum.
Shave your eyebrows.
Send one male and one female unicorn (Sea-kun told me you had some.)
And, finally, declare me as, "the sexiest nation to ever set foot on earth's holy soil."
If you refuse to meet the list, this is WAR!!!~
Fool.
~Alpatraum-chan (and Pete)
Twitch.
Twitch twitch.
"WHAT DOES THAT BITCH THINK SHE'S DOING!?" Arthur shouted. [5]
Owari~
Extra: Go, Japan-kun, go!
Japan was a shy, innocent (besides his perverted art.) nation, with a noble expression. He tried his hardest to work together with the Axis Powers, and followed rules obediently. He was......like a puppy.
Which isn't always bad; except when you meet Hoshi-chan.
"O-hay-o......Watashi.....wa.....Hoshi.....?" Hoshi sounded out, checking on her Japanese. [6].
Japan turned to her, startled, "Yes, that's correct." He whispered, shyly.
What was this? Hoshi beamed at him in wonder; that shy expression.....those big, kind of sad eyes......that glossy, fluffy black hair.....he was just.....like....!?
"P-puppy!" Hoshi squealed, latching herself onto the bony waist of Kiku [7].
"G-g-gya! T-this is only my second time!" he panicked, blushing profusely, while trying to prey Hoshi off.
With this glomperific girl on the scene, how will Japan ever keep up his nature? Its ok, Japan, we're cheering you on!
Go, Japan-kun, go!
Owari~
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Notes:
[1] That's a beach by my house lol wtf stop me now.
[2] Uke is the "feminine" term for the male-male relationship. Its topper, or masculine counterpart, is called the seme.
[3] A combination of "chibi" meaning small and cute, and "suke" a masculine name ending for Japanese men.
[4] Shota - Short Japanese character mostly portrayed as a nerd, with large glasses, a bow tie, and shorts.
[5] England's person name is Arthur Kirkland.
[6] Translated to, "Good day........I......am.......Hoshi....?"
[7] Japan's person name is Honda, Kiku.
Questions:
[1] Same as last time?
[2] Do you think Hoshi's hair would look better with it's little side pony, down, or something else? (comment plz)
This one took longer to write; I was busy planning a stupid get-together-tea-time. And right when I sit down to write my baby sister starts wailing, and pukes all over my mom's bed. She won't sleep in hers, so she's asleep on MY BED! Sob.
So, I decided not to write till I get 3-5 reviews, but only because I'm a lazy ass like that. I apologize for any mistakes.
And thanks for the pirate lingo (didnthelpatall) ! And thanks for the confusing Sealand history, Wikipedia bastards!
~Chirmling
P.S. Go to my deviantART for a picture of Hoshi and Scott.
.com/art/Hoshi-and-Scott-128808011 - Hoshi and Scott by me. Watch me and I write faster! XD
.com/art/At-Hoshi-Chibi-129619837 - My bff Zell drew her for an art trade! XD Her eyes are blue in that, but their actually gold.....
.com/ - Who Pete is based off of. At least, by looks. This Pete is a bit more silly~.