After the second date

Chapter 3:

Kensi resisted the urge to sigh loudly forcing a pleasant smile on her face as she thanked the waitress who had refilled the empty wine glass. Swiping an errant strand of her hair that had somehow escaped from her elegant up do she glanced down at the golden watch fastened around her wrist.

She was going to kill him.

She had pushed the glass door to the restaurant open smiling at the waitress who stood there to greet her and then followed another to the table Pete had set aside for the two of them. She had been fashionably, just late only to find he wasn't there. And so she'd sat ordered some wine, some very fancy, rather expensive wine and sat and waited for her date to arrive.

He was nearly fifteen minutes late for their date. She had been sitting there for fifteen minutes the flame of hope in her chest slowly dying. She looked around to see happy couples eating, laughing, chatting and sighed again hitting the redial button on her phone.

And once again...three rings later and a dial tone.

Deciding that there was no way in hell that she was going to be the woman who waited twenty minutes for her date to arrive she stood up grabbing her silky, satin black clutch and headed back towards the entrance. The woman smiled grimly at Kensi not bothering to say anything. The agent wanted to defend herself, tell her that they had been dating for several months, that she was sure he'd just have car trouble or something but as she opened her mouth she sighed and opted to simply pull out her credit card paying for the table that was only half sat at and the wine that was only a quarter drunk. She smiled in thanks before leaving the restaurant and wrapped her arms around her frame as the cold wind engulfed her as the door closed behind her.

She began driving back towards her house the roads were quiet thankfully and for once she didn't drive fast. She didn't drive like a maniac. She was in no hurry to get home. To get back to the empty house that she hadn't thought she'd be staying in that night, or at least not alone. As she pulled into her driveway she sat for a second in the car after she turned the ignition off, fighting the tears that were threatening to fall. She looked to the house the dark windows and she felt hollow, empty. ...like her house.

Why? Why did this always happen to her? What was it?

She had to know. There had to be something, something wrong with her. She was sick of ending up dumped, cheated on, left, whatever, she was sick of being the one always left behind. With another turn of the keys the ignition sparked to life again and Kensi pulled out onto the road again.

Twenty minutes later Kensi was sitting in the driveway of Pete Hennings. She threw her clutch back on the passenger seat after digging out her key to the place and braced herself to meet the whipping wind all over again. She stepped out of her car letting the door click shut quietly behind her before she took a deep breath and started up the path to his door her heels clicking softly. Kensi unlocked Pete's brass door quietly and stepped over the threshold. She headed up the carpeted hall and an unsettling curiosity bubbled inside her as she heard his voice talking. Only a second later she realised that he was on the phone seen as there was no other voice but as she got closer to the lounge where she knew he was she froze in her spot as she caught what seemed to be the last words of his conversation.

"Okay baby well I'll see you tonight yeah...okay I love you" She felt sick, ill and feeling her heart drop into her stomach she resisted the urge she suddenly got to vomit.

All of a sudden he had turned into the hallway a small smile on his face and then he turned deathly pale. Several seconds which felt like an eternity passed as they looked at each other. She couldn't form words. She wanted to yell at him, scream at him, throw something at him but she couldn't speak, the constricting lump in her throat made sure of that. So it was Pete that broke the silence,

"Kens" he looked at her his eyes looking thoroughly worried almost glossy.

"Kens" he repeated but she didn't answer her mind processing the words she had just heard,

"Kens ...I ..I didn't hear you I...Kensi?" finally she looked up at him meeting his eyes,

"Who...who was that?" She asked quietly her eyebrows arching. His eyes met hers and then travelled down taking in her dressed up figure,

"wow Kens you look a-"

"Who was that Pete?" she asked again cutting him off not wanting to believe it, not wanting to acknowledge what she'd heard. She wanted him to tell her that it was his sister or someone who had ...a problem or something and that was why he had missed dinner and that's why he had said what he did and then she wanted to have his arms wrapped around her and be told that he wasn't leaving her. That he wasn't rejecting her; that he hadn't cheated on her.

How did she always get herself into these situations?

"I'm sorry Kensi" it was all he said before she turned. She turned away from him on her heel not muttering a word and began walking away back down the hall. There was no way she was crying over him.

Or at least there was no way she was going to let him see it happen.

This time she couldn't help the tears. As she drove down the street she sat still, her back straight and her eyes focused ahead as she desperately tried to cling to the small shred of control she still had left. But it slipped from her and before she knew it and she pulled to a stop on the side of the road. She let her shoulders slump forward and leaned on the steering wheel. Her shoulders shook and she swiped a few angry tears from her cheeks. It was another five, ten minutes before she managed to stop shaking jamming a finger onto the heater button. She wiped the tears from her cheeks and blinked away the moisture from her eyes before she began to drive again.

When she drove up her street all she wanted to do was get inside and get into bed turning off the lights and rest. She wanted to close her eyes and forget what had happened, forget that she was alone. Again.

Forget what an idiot she had made of herself all over again.

But the night was not hers. It was not going her way and she let out an audible groan of frustration when she spotted the dark green car parked outside her house. She could see that the lounge light had been turned on from the inside and this time it was her anger that exploded inside of her.

She didn't want to see him. She didn't want him to see her. She never wanted to talk to the ass again. Her foot slammed down on the accelerator and the car screeched as it sped down the street driving away from her house. Away from Pete. Away from another boyfriend she had driven away all over again.

Where the hell was she going to go now?

Kensi had driven around for almost thirty more minutes and quickly found her night was disappearing. But it wasn't until she turned off her car that she realised she had driven to the bar that she knew the team was at.

Sighing she grabbed her keys, picked up her bag and stepped out of the car looking ahead at the place with music and chatter flowing from it. When she walked into the bar her heels were already beginning to kill her feet and her heart was thumping in her throat as she begged the tears not to fall. Walking in the door her eyes scanned the bar and quickly found the team which apparently turned out to be just Sam, Deeks and Callen. She quickly beelined straight to their table and when she arrived she slumped down next to Callen grabbing his drink after throwing them a quick greeting,

"Hey guys" The boys looked up in surprise as they took in the frazzled woman. Her eyes were smudged with dark mascara and she looked thoroughly miserable,

"Hey Kens, what are you doing here?" Deeks asked carefully as he took in his partner who was usually the calm and collected one of them. The three men watched as her hand closed around Callen's glass and took a big gulp of his drink.

"I broke up with Pete" Callen felt his heart twinge and turned to her as she downed the rest of his drink,

"Whoa, slow down there girl" Sam said reaching over and pulling the glass down but it was empty already,

"Sam...I am here because I plan to be very highly drunk by the end of this night okay? Damn I hate beer" she grimaced at the starchy taste in her mouth not noticing the others eyes fixed on her,

"Alright hold up Kens why did you and Pete break up?" asked Deeks as she motioned to the barman,

"I don't want to talk about it guys" she said dismissively but it didn't stop them,

"What happened did you guys have a fight?" Sam pressed but he didn't get a response instead he got to see the bar's logo on the bottom of the shot glass she threw back before ordering one more for all of them and several more for her,

"Kens Hetty will kill you if you go into work tomorrow with a hangover" Callen tried knowing that her work was the one thing she never messed with,

"I don't care" she stated and grinned at the barman who sat the drinks in front of them. In the end it was Kensi who did most of the shots except for one that she made Callen do with her. Several more shots had Kensi laughing at their jokes and joining in on the old banter that was normal between the team. At least until they brought up the topic again to which she would spectacularly avoid, dismiss or at worst become angry with whoever it was that had brought it up. So they did avoid the topic knowing she didn't want to talk about it, at least not right then.

"You know what I hate men" she spat out with a slight slur to her words. They were the first words she'd spoken for a while and they'd left her to sort out her thoughts after she had snapped at them. But now they turned back to her focusing on their youngest agent,

"You don't hate me Kensi" Deeks teased,

"Sometimes" She said and he gasped in mock horror,

"No I do...I give up... you know I try ..and it always ends ..up like this so I'm done...I'm over this whole dating thing...I don't care anymore" They watched her, it was obvious that she was hurt they could see the pain welling in her eyes but they knew it was more than that. She was upset they could see as much but they knew it was more than a little bit. They knew that every break up chipped away at her just a little bit more, broke another part of her. Cracked another shard of the mask she wore every day,

"Kensi what did he do I'm sure it wasn't that bad" Sam reasoned with her,

"Yeah Kens it was probably just one stupid little mistake that any normal human male would make" Deeks said, but apparently it was most certainly the wrong thing to say,

"You know what you're allll the same!..All of you and then you go and try to defend each other! You're supposed to be on my side not his" They turned to Kensi who was well on her way to being more than a little bit tipsy and more than a little upset they watched her carefully,

"We're not on his side Kens"

"You are I mean how hard is it to remember one thing Deeks come on"

"well...I mean there's not just the one birthday you know to remember—" But it was actually Callen who cut him off watching Kensi closely,

"Pete didn't turn up did he?" He asked her softly and the others turned to Kensi as her shoulders slumped,

"We talked about it today" Then she turned to Deeks,

"Remember you were there..I said to him I'll see you tonight then..didn't I Deeks when I was on the phone remember in the car" Deeks smiled at her nodding as she tried to make him remember,

"yeah I remember Kens" he assured his distressed partner,

"See I even reminded him and he still didn't turn up. I hate men." She leant forward on the table letting her hands support her head,

"Kens maybe you should give him a –" Sam tried,

"no...no..no..no..no..no" she repeated over and over shaking her head with every syllable before she held a hand to it as the alcohol finally caught up with her. She sat still for only a second and they almost thought that Kensi would cry. She looked so vulnerable and so broken in that one moment that it was probably one of very few times they ever got to see Kensi when she wasn't guarded with all the walls she'd built up in her lifetime.

But the moment was fleeting and as Sam was going to reach across to her and take her hand she abruptly stood up swaying a little in her heels.

"I need another drink...and I want to dance, one of you should come and dance with me" She stated laughing trying to forget, trying to pretend everything was okay for her. Callen offered her a small smile before he patted the seat beside him where she had been sitting,

"Sit Kens"

"Fine I'll go dance by myself then" she said and she turned walking away weaving through the crowd towards the bar.

Hey guys, okay I'm back on track I think

Pleaseeeeeeeee review for mee!

Oh and AngelVanguard you literally must have read my mind. :) That was the general idea in the first place...you know what they say great minds think alike or something like that! Sounds good anyway:) hehe

Thanks to everyone who is reading and sooo much to everyone who has reviewed!

Nina

xx