Clint's POV

"Phil, I don't really have time for a social chat…"

"We are pulling you out."

"What! Why, I'm doing fine, there aren't any complications…"

"It's Romanoff."

As soon as he said that, I was out of there quickly booking the next flight back home.

"Phil is she alive?" I asked boarding the plane my voice cracking.

"Just hurry Clint." He replied as I took my seat.

"Phil is she dead!" I screamed into the phone causing everyone on the plane to stare at me.

"She's alive, for now, but it's pretty bad."

"Why did you tell me?"

"I know how much you care about her."

I cleared my throat, a little embarrassed that Phil knew.

"Now get some sleep, you'll need it when you get down here."

"You keep her alive 'til I get there, ok Phil."

"Alright hawk, just hurry."

Then he hung up. I sat listening to the silence of the phone, and then the tears came. I hadn't actually cried in years, crying was a sign of weakness, of emotion, and in my profession that's what could get you killed. I couldn't sleep, so I just sat scrolling though pictures on my phone that were of Tasha and me."

"Can I get you anything sir?" The flight attendant asked.

Quickly I wiped the tears out of my eyes. "No I'm fine, thank you, how much longer?"

"Only forty minutes until we land."

I hadn't realized how long I had been looking through photos. After the attendant left I got a little bit of rest before I heard, "please fasten your seatbelt, we are making our descent."

After the plane landed, I hurried in to the company car that was waiting for me; it was the longest car ride of my life. When we reached S.H.I.E.L.D, I raced up the stares, and almost ripped the front doors off.

"Barton, we need you to calm down." Some agents, who I had never met, told me.

"Where is she?" I asked but my voice was muffled by the wave of noise from the other agents.

"Barton just sit…"

"Where is she!" I screamed causing the noise to stop. It was completely silent until another voice echoed through the corridor.

"Barton!" The voice yelled; Phil.

I turned and saw Phil coming towards me. Before I knew it, I was traveling down a hall to the infirmary, I assumed.

"You didn't sleep did you?" He asked.

"Did you think that I would be able to?"

"I guess not," Then he stopped right in front of the door.

"Why did we stop?"

"Clint, I must warn you, she is really bad off."

"Please," I begged.

"Alright," he said opening the door, "I'll be out here when you're done."

Slowly I walked into the room.

"Agent Barton, Agent Coulson said you would come, fallow me." A nurse said leading me down a hall. That's when I saw her. She was hooked up to all of these wires, and her face was bloodied and bruised. I stopped in the doorway not willing myself to go in. For the longest time I just watched her breathe, that was the only thing I could focus on, the rise and fall of her chest. Then, it stopped, her breathing stopped. Her heart monitor flat lined. I tried to get to her but the nurses held me back. Usually I would have fought them, it would have been easy, but all the strength had left my body.

"Agent Barton, please, we can't help her if we have to hold you back."

I got the message; I stopped fighting them and left. Slowly I walked to the hall. When I saw Phil, I broke down. He wrapped his arms around me as I sobbed into his shoulder. Phil was the only one who had ever seen me like this, he was the one who brought me in and listen to every horrifying moment I had to tell of my life before S.H.I.E.L.D. He was the closest thing I had to a father, a family.

"I love her Phil, if, if she dies, she'll take all of me with her."

Although Phil stayed silent, I felt comfort in confessing these things to him. For the longest time I just held onto Phil crying, then the nurse came out.

"How is she?" Phil asked as I composed myself.

"She's stable," she said wiping sweat from her brow. "Agent Barton she's been calling for you."

"She's awake?" I asked.

"No, but she's has been mumbling your name."

I looked over at Phil hoping he would understand.

"I need to talk to the doctor." Phil said as if hearing my silent prayer. I didn't want to be alone. Together we walked back to Tasha's room. And again, I stopped at the door, as if there was a force holding me back.

"Clint," she mumbled causing me to come rushing to her side.

"Hey Nat, I'm here," I whispered grabbing her hand. Phil came up behind me with a chair. "Thanks," I said sitting down, my eyes never leaving her face.

"I'm going to go talk to the doctor." Phil said gripping my shoulder before leaving.

The silence in the room was unbearable. "Nat," I started my voice soft. "You got to hold on, for me, ok, because if I lose you, who's gonna keep me in check on missions, and stop me from being a total ass. I mean, there's Phil but we both know that I almost never listen to him." I smiled or attempted to. "But I listen to you, and I need you Tasha, I need you. I love you." I kissed her hand.

For three days she didn't wake up, and for three days I never left her side. I had learned that she had been tortured; she had been shot in the thigh, a knife had sliced across her stomach and both of her wrists had been slit. Lucky, that's what the nurses kept calling her, lucky. However, I knew that Natasha wasn't lucky, she was a fighter. She never quit, even when it was needed.

"Clint," she mumbled waking up, her emerald eyes looking into mine causing my heart to skip.

"Morning sleeping beauty," I smiled, lightly kissing her forehead.