I'm so sorry I haven't been updating! But it's summer now, so hopefully I will have more time! Thank you to all of my readers. Remember, reviews make my day! Xoxoxo
The house was eerily quiet as I opened the door to my room. I didn't think he'd leave like this. No matter how bad a fight was, Peeta never left in the middle of it.
I prayed that if he'd left, he hadn't gone far.
I crept down the stairs, sobs catching in my throat and wracking my body. I had no idea where the strength to get off of my bedroom floor had come from, but now that I was up and looking for Peeta all I wanted to do was find him.
I didn't have to go far. As my foot made contact with the solid ground at the bottom of the stairs, I could see Peeta's blonde head and broad shoulders over the couch. He hadn't left. Thank God.
Walking up to the back of the couch, I put my hands on each of his shoulders.
His back tensed up, his jaw clenched, and I didn't know if he was having another episode or if he was just afraid he would…
"Peeta," I whispered into his ear. "Come back to me."
"I'm here," his voice came out hushed and defeated. He was hurting more than I was.
I kept my hands planted on his shoulders as I kissed his cheeks, his neck, his ear. "No you aren't, you're so far away…" I felt him sigh. "Talk to me. Please. I'm not angry."
He stood, distancing himself from me and the comfort I was trying so hard to give him. He turned to face me, showing for the first time how much this had affected him. His eyes were bloodshot, tears streaming down both sides of his face. He stood still, taking in my same emotional state.
We just stared at each other until he spoke.
"Katniss, you don't get it. I could have really hurt you. I could have…" He trialed off, unable to finish the thought. "Maybe I should leave. Give us both some space."
"NO!" The reply escaped my mouth and surprised both of us.
"Kat…"
"I said 'no'." My heart was beating out of my chest, my feelings pouring down my face.
"All I'm doing is putting you in danger. I can't do that to you, I love you too much…"
"And I love you too much to let you go!"
I walked around the couch so that I was within arms' reach of my Peeta.
"Katniss…"
"I said 'no'." I repeated, putting my hands on either side of his head. "Peeta Mellark, listen to me right now. I can handle this. I can handle the bumps and bruises along the way, okay? I know you never mean to hurt me and next time if I need to leave, then I will. But what I can't handle is living my life without you. I can't handle waking up without you, fending off the nightmares without you, or eating breakfast without you." I was full on sobbing now. "You still save me. Every single day. Please…"
He couldn't leave me. He couldn't.
I saw his resolve crumbling. He opened his arms to me and I walked into them willingly. I rested my head on his chest and tried to catch my breath as he whispered to me.
"Okay, sweetheart, okay. Ssshhh…I'm not leaving. I couldn't. I love you, I love you." He brought us down to the couch, cradling me in his lap. He kissed my tears away until I settled down. "But you need to promise me something, Katniss," he finally whispered.
"What?" I asked, closing my eyes, and laying my head on his shoulder.
"If I tell you to leave during a flashback, you leave."
"Peeta…"
"You can come back. Just let the worse of it pass. Sweetheart, if I tell you to leave, there's a reason for it. I don't want to even come near you in that state again."
I opened my mouth to argue with him, but he cut me off again.
"Give me ten minutes. Then you can come back, okay?" He kissed my lips gently. "Please, Katniss. For me."
I nodded, not happy. But if giving him up to the flashbacks for a few more minutes means I can keep him, then I'll do it.
"Okay." I took a deep breath.
He smiled, for the first time today, and I couldn't help but love him even more. He always thought about me.
"I love you, Peeta." I said it. On my own. Without responding to him saying it.
He looked about as surprised as I did. "I love you too. Always," He whispered into my ear. "And I'm not going anywhere."