/ This was a request. Please don't kill me. I need help, serious mental help. Enjoy~/

"Oh sweet buttery Jesus.", you were stricken with terror as Kyle walked down the street with his new attire. "He's back " you whispered and ran to Cartman's house.

After a careful consideration…

" WHAT? No way am I going goth!", You shook your head. You were in Cartman's room with the squad… without the transformed Jersey Kyle.
" It's the only way to bring the stupid Jew back down a level. We know you like him and have sworn secrecy. We can blackmail you any moment now, (Y/N).", Cartman looked at you with mock seriousness.
" But… COME ON! Look at Stan, can't he be a candidate?"
" No. I did it last time. It's your turn. "
" WhhhhhhhhhY?"
"MHMMRPH RHM! "
" See? Even Kenny's all like," COME ON! "
" Fine. "
" Then it's time for Operation GOTH to begin. "
You sighed and stood up from your place and started to leave Cartman's room.
"Godspeed, (Y/N). Godspeed. ", Cartman shook his head in mock pity.

After a HUGE shopping spree…

You took your black eyeliner and lipstick out of its package and took a deep breath. You were wearing a grey t-shirt with a black cross pattern and black skinny jeans and shoes. While unscrewing the cap of the black eyeliner you cringed at the thought of which Cartman stated," We know you like him and have sworn secrecy." That made you think ,'' Wait.. How does Cartman know? What he guessing? Son of a bietch! Very well, two can play this game! ". You applied the black eyeliner and black lipstick gingerly, re-evaluating some life choices. You took a deep breath and went out of your house. You started to walk down you street, eyes on the floor; downcast and forlorn.
" Hey doll! What gives?"
You looked up to see Kyle. Perfect, time to act upon the operation.
" Nothing special. "
" Good, would you like to go to the movies with me, doll? "
WOAH WOAH THAT WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN. WHAT DO. PLAY IT COOL, PLAY IT COOL.
" N-no. I'm fine by myself. "
" That's fuckin' cabbage! I insist. "
Your face must have looked like a tomato like now and you looked at the floor shyly.
Suddenly, someone grabbed your arm.
" Sorry, but she's with me."
You looked up to see Clyde and gave him a "thank-you" with our eyes.
" Who says? " sneered Kyle.
" I do, wanna-be Jersey Jew. " Clyde leaned in towards Kyle and smirked.
Your feet were planted into the ground as you watched your friend and crush fight.
/ This is where I loose my shit and 'The Outsiders' start to come in /
" Oh shit, I'm so scared! ", Kyle rolled his eyes with a sarcastic expression.
" Hey! " You yelled, gaining their attention. " Break it up, Clyde! "
" I was just trying to- ohhhhhhhh. Fuucccck you. " Clyde facepalmed and groaned.
" What do you mean Clyde? " You leaned towards Clyde semi-pushing Kyle away, curious.
" Cartman said something about,' Save (Y/N), she needs help. Kyle is probably trying to rape her'. I swear, Cartman is the worst shipper in this town." Clyde put down his hands and looked at you and winked. " Have fun with Kyle~ ", then left. Leaving you high and dry.
You felt Kyle's hand on your shoulder and you turned to him with a blushing face.
" Soo~ How 'bout that date? "
, , T.
" uHHH, excuse me? ", You tried to pull off an innocent and naive look while you had cold sweat dripping down your forehead.
FUCKDUCKDUCKFUCKFUCKTUCKTUCKGUCKCFUGFUFKFUHKFUHAFAHKGAHKACKACHKFUCK
" You know what I'm talking about~.", Kyle face got closer to yours.
SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
" Do I? ", You staggered backwards.
nonononononnonononononnononononononnoonoonnoonononnoononnonononoononononnNONONONONO!
" You do, doll~ " He gave you a sly smirk and proceeded to invade your personal space.

You tilted your head and looked away, flustered beyond comprehension.
Kyle grabbed your chin and he turned your face towards him.
Hysteria took over you and you slapped him in the face, in which leaving him stunned.
As for you, wait where the hell are you?
Yeah, you took off like Speedy Gonzales on drugs to Stan's house.
Mainly that you couldn't trust Cartman.
You knocked on the Marsh residence and let you in, a bit surprised from your get-up. As soon as you were out of radar, you busted into Stan's room with incredible speed, and then hid in his closet. You were whispering profanities simultaneously to keep yourself sane. You began to mull over the situation you were currently in, lost in thought. You heard Stan enter his room saying to himself," Dad said that (Y/N) was here to see me... Where the hell is she? Welp! " Stan walked his way to his closet and opened to the door- oh there's you crouched and curled up in a ball! WAIT WHAT. He sees you. Not awkward at all. Yep. Just gonna stare at each other. Mhmmm. Oh what's that emotion that overtook Stan's face? Oh yeah, I believe it's called 'surprise' and 'confusion'.
" (Y/N)!? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IN MY CLOSET?! "
" Nothing! Whatever do you mean? "
" Oh sure, and the earth is flat! "
You looked both right and left and then pushed Stan and somersaulted under his bed.
" DUDE WHAT THE FUCK. "
" I NEED TO HIDE STAN. "
" WHY? "
" 'COS I CAN'T-UGH! "
" Come on, you can tell me, " coaxed Stan, trying to get you out.
" But it's secret, okay? This is a REALLY BIG SECRET! "
" Nope. I'm not listening. "
" You DICK, LISTEN! "
" Fine! Women are insane, I swear! "
You took a deep breath and you tackled Stan while getting out under his bed. Stan pushed you off of him and stared you ," Dafuq, bitch? " and got up as you got up and- wait what. Why the hell is Stan half naked. He was dressed before. What. What. Is he some fricking ninja or something. Yeah. That explains a lot. You stared at Stan with a poker face, as he reciprocated. Awkward moment, to say the least. You walked over to his bed and sat on it, he did the same. Stan raised an eyebrow asked," Is there something you'd like to say? "
" Uhhh, yes. "
" Is it how you're in love with Kyle? "
He's a fucking ninja. We called it.
" You're a ninja aren't you? "
" No, it just painfully obvious how you two act around each other. "
" Oh shit! Does Kyle know!? "
"I don't know. "
" By the way? "
" Hm? "
" Why are you half naked? "
" Oh, nothing. You came in like a hurricane so fast and you brushed against my shoulder, so I spilled my drink on myself."
" Make sen-"
BAM, THE DOOR OPENS.
THERE HE IS, KYLEY-B IN ALL HIS MAJESTIC GLORY.
Next thing you know, you're out on the street holding Kyle's hand, who's dragging you. You're blushing, he's blushing, it's hella awkward.
You jerked your back and Kyle turns around pissed. He has a mini-glare on his face and asks in a slightly venomous voice," What were you doing with Stan? Was he trying to hit on you? That fucking son of a muff cabbage."
" Hey! It's not nice to call Stan an overfucked vagina, and he wasn't trying to come on to me. Why do you care?"
" He was half naked and the both of you were on his bed! "
" Dude! We're only friends, and besides, he has Wendy! "
" I- uh. "
" I think someone's a bit jealous~ ", you cooed with a smirk very evident on your face.
Kyle shook his head profusely," No! "
" I think you are~ "
" Noooooo. "
" It's okay, I reciprocate your feelings. " You tiptoed and lightly kissed Kyle's cheek.
Kyles face flushed into a brighter pink.
" I thought Jerseys were really robust, hmmm? ", you teased Kyle.
He said nothing but grabbed your hand.
You laughed and laced your fingers with his.

THE END?