Much thanks to my incredible beta, Cristi0819.
Also, thanks to everyone who has read, reviewed, and add this to your alert & favorites lists, I'm humbled by the reception to this story.
Chapter 3
Steph was still asleep, not that I was surprised. The woman loved her sleep. Mornings, for me, were a time to just get a move on to not let my mind sit and contemplate too much on the things I was missing in life. Having Steph in my arms, however, reminded me that I could have all those things I was missing and wanted if I'd just open up to her.
All of my excuses were ridiculous. She wasn't safer by keeping her distance from me. She was safer if I kept her close. My life could easily lend itself to a relationship with someone who understood and accepted my choices, which my Babe clearly did. It was time for me to step up or step off, as Lester so aptly put it a few weeks ago. He reminded me in no uncertain terms that most of the men inside RangeMan weren't going to give me too much longer before they started asking her out, and that was an idea that I couldn't tolerate. Now I only had to hope that she'd take me, that I hadn't caused irreparable damage. The fact that she'd accepted this weekend invitation gave me hope.
She moved against me, throwing her arm over my chest as she buried her head in the pillow. Running my fingers over her slender arm, I came across the bruises from Martin's guard. The bruises were more deeply colored and angry looking now. I rolled my shoulders trying to let go of the tension that immediately invaded my body at the sight of her bruised flesh.
The sight of the bruises and the thoughts that came with her being injured couldn't be ignored or quelled, however, and forced me to stand up and walk around. Eventually, I did the only thing that would help me let go of the rage I was feeling over Steph's bruises, I dialed Tank.
"Yo." He answered after one ring. "You better not be calling because you've screwed up already." His voice was stern and despite hating everyone involved in my relationship with Stephanie, I knew that all my men were watching closely. Tank genuinely loved Steph, but was rooting for me to step up for her, unlike a few of the others who were waiting for me to mess up so they could step in.
"No. I need to know about Martin's guards." My voice was a growl, but I knew that Tank would understand.
"They're both hurting in their cells this morning. Lester and I weren't gentle with them. We didn't do as thorough of a job as you did on Martin, but they'll think twice about holding down a woman against her will again."
I wasn't surprised really, but I needed to hear it from him. "Martin's status?"
"You did break his nose and cracked a few ribs. His jaw wasn't broken, however. He's in lock-up. How's she holding up?" His concern for his adopted little sister was obvious.
"She's good. You know she's tough."
He chuckled. "No doubt about that, she's tougher than you."
I smirked, realizing he was right. She is tougher than me. Just as I was about to ask him some more questions I heard Steph mumbling in the bedroom. "I'm offline." I reminded Tank just before hanging up.
In the bedroom, I found Steph mumbling and tossing a bit in her sleep. To my surprise she hadn't had any nightmares during the night, but it looked like one was about to get her now. I sat on the bed next to her, running my hands over her head, hoping that my presence would reassure her and stop the bad dream.
She moved away from my touch, her mind not totally aware of its surroundings. I was about to reach for her again and try to wake her when she sat up with a gasp. Reaching for her face, I looked into her eyes. "You're okay, it was a just a dream."
Letting out a deep breath, she nodded at me. Lying back down, she pulled the covers up around her body. I moved to sit against the headboard and pulled her to rest her head on my chest. "Dreaming about last night?"
Her fingers ran across my bare chest as she took a minute to gather her thoughts. "It was a strange combination of last night and the incident with the Slayers."
My muscles immediately tensed at her words, but I tried to relax by blowing out a breath and kissing her forehead. I hated knowing the Slayers still invaded her dreams. Pulling her closer to me, I hoped that I could give her some security as she woke. "I've got you now, no one can hurt you."
Her cheeks tilted up in a smile against my chest just before her stomach emitted a loud growl. "I'll order some room service."
"Pancakes?" She sat up so that she could make eye contact with me.
I nodded. Despite my better judgment, I was never going to be able to convince her to eat healthy. She gave me a wide smile and kissed my cheek before jumping up and hitting the bathroom. I dressed in some sweats and a t-shirt after ordering breakfast.
We sat at the dining table discussing plans for the day until breakfast was delivered. Watching and listening to Steph eat was always an enjoyable experience. I looked through the newspaper a bit to distract myself and control my body when I felt her eyes on me. She was chewing on her bottom lip as my eyes met hers.
"Babe?" I couldn't decide if she was having some kind of flashback to last night or simply having deep thoughts.
"I've been working with Hector and Tank you know." Hector had taken it upon himself to make sure she got some training. She was always so stubbornly resistant, but he'd convinced her somehow and even made it fun for her. Tank had also stepped up and helped with parts that Hector had a hard time teaching. In truth, most of the guys would help out often, but most of the training was on Hector and Tank. I was glad she was doing it, but I mostly stayed out of it. Whenever I got involved it seemed to make things tense for her and I didn't want to add any pressure.
I nodded. "From what I understand you're doing great." I tried to play it off like I'd just heard it from the guys, but I watched almost every training session on the monitors. She was learning tons and getting quite good.
She rolled her eyes and snorted, "Yeah, because you and the rest of the guys never watch on the monitors." I gave her a guilty smile. There was no point in denying it, but I didn't feel the need to confirm it either. "Anyway, they've never taught me how to deal with multiple attackers."
The experience last night was so very fresh in her mind that she was obviously trying to figure out how to better protect herself. "Babe, in cases like that the best you can hope for is not to get into it. Very few people can get out of a situation with multiple attackers who are stronger and bigger without a weapon." I didn't want her getting hurt worse by trying to fight her way out of an impossible situation.
"I'm getting better at the moves the guys teach me. I'm getting stronger, too." She said with a hint of pride in her voice that I was glad to hear. "Still, I don't know how to control that fear very well. I was so very terrified and I just froze. I don't know how to be brave like you."
I moved to squat in front of her and took her hands in mine. "Babe, you're braver than me. I'm afraid when I get in situations like that; it's just that I have more experience so I'm able to focus on what I know to do. I don't want for you to have the experiences I've had."
She let out a deep breath, but didn't look convinced. Tucking a curl behind her ear, I said, "Babe, I've been afraid, but I can't possibly understand the fear you felt last night. That fear of a man using his body to violate me is just something I can't relate to. In distraction cases, the best you can do is wait for us to come get you, this way you're not hurt. You can use what you learned to get free, but let us get there to back you up."
Her bottom lip was back between her teeth as she nodded at me. "I just want to be better, more capable."
"You are more than capable and you're getting better all the time. Proud of you, Babe." She smiled then, she knew she could trust and believe my words. That was a blessing and a curse, because it meant that I'd have to work harder to undo all my previous statements about relationships and loving her.
After breakfast we got ready leisurely. She came out of the bathroom, shock evident on her face when she saw me. I'd worn blue jeans with my standard black t-shirt today. "Wow, Ranger." A gorgeous blush tinted her cheeks letting me know the full depth of her thoughts.
"You look amazing too, Babe." She had on a knee length floral skirt and matching blue tank top, all of it accentuating her gorgeous curves. She'd covered up her bruised cheek with make-up. I didn't mind the bruise, but I knew she didn't like being the center of gossip or whispers. I held my hand out to her, glad when she latched on and let me lead her to the elevator.
We spent the morning walking around the area near our hotel. Steph shopped, tried a few things on, but didn't buy much. I wanted to buy her a few things but she wouldn't let me. I fought the urge to push it, mainly because I didn't want to ruin our time together. I had plenty of money and she didn't ask for much, anything really, but I was always desperately looking for a way to do something, anything for her.
She was radiant as we returned to the hotel room. We ordered lunch and sat at the table enjoying the light meal. She took a long sip from her water bottle and looked at me with a look of devotion that caught me off guard. "I'm having a great time, Ranger. Thanks for spending this time with me, for this getaway."
"I've only just begun, Babe. I'm having a great time, too." I was doing my best to drop my blank face around her, make sure she understood how important and valuable time with her was to me.
After lunch we sank into the couch, our bodies gravitating towards one another instantly. We started to watch a movie, when she laid her head in my lap. I ran my fingers through her hair, just enjoying the relaxed state of the day. It didn't take her long to fall asleep and I used the time to simply watch her and give myself the pep talk I would need to admit my feelings to her tonight.
We got ready for dinner in the separate bedrooms of the suite. I'd chosen a dark blue suit for the night, hoping to impress and surprise her with my willingness to wear something not in all black. I waited for her to finish getting ready in the living room.
When she came out of the bedroom, I stood up to face her and felt all the blood drain from my body. She was beyond beautiful, in a red flowing dress that ended at just above her knee. I couldn't wait to run my hands along the thin straps holding it up over her shoulders. "Babe." She blushed before I even finished my compliment. "You're exquisite."
"You are quite handsome, Ranger."
She took my hand as I led her to the parking garage and my Porsche. We made the five mile drive to the restaurant in silence, our hands locked the entire time. I could feel her eyes on me as I drove and fought every urge I had to just pull over and kiss her senseless.
Our waiter left us alone after our wine was served and dinner ordered. I took a drink of wine and reached across the table for Steph's hand, which she took quickly. We talked and drank all night, the two of us in an unusually relaxed conversation.
When the waiter came to clear our entree plates, we both ordered desserts. He left and Steph looked at me with her eyebrows furrowed. "What's going on, Ranger? I'm having a great time but you're being so..."
My behavior, my attempt to open up to her was throwing her off balance. "So, what?"
"I don't know, so different. Is something wrong? Do you have some kind of bomb to drop on me?" She played with her necklace as she waited for my response. Her questions and doubts were further proof that she didn't trust me with her heart.
"I'm just trying to make up for lost time, Babe. I've wasted so many opportunities with you and I don't want to do that any longer. I know I've hurt you, but I promise I'm not going to do that this time."
She nodded, but her shoulders were tense as she processed what I'd said. Her bottom lip disappeared into her mouth just as the waiter brought our desserts. She took a bite of her cake and let out a small moan. "I know we probably have more to talk about, but this is too good to be interrupted and I'd rather talk in private."
I nodded, understanding the desire to discuss deep feelings without having strangers close by eavesdropping. As usual she pulled up some kind of reserve and got back to our evening before I started to confess my feelings. The night went from slightly tense and uneasy to completely calm and content all because of how she steered our conversation. It boggled my mind that she didn't see how she held all the power in our relationship.
Standing outside waiting for the valet to bring our car, I pulled her into my chest for a hug and kissed her forehead. Her hands gripped at my back and held me close to her with a sigh. I stepped back slightly, my heart skipping a beat at the look of passion and devotion in her eyes. Taking her chin between my thumb and forefinger, I held her face still as my lips met hers. The kiss was slow and sweet and despite the overwhelming urge to take it deeper, I stopped, aware of the valets watching us.
The minute we got into the hotel room all those urges I'd been resisting all day couldn't be denied. I cupped her cheeks in my hands and pulled her face to mine, kissing her deeply and walking her body back to the wall. I loved feeling the way her soft body molded to mine. She met my passion with her own, a small moan leaving her throat as my hand tangled into her hair.
I pulled back only when I was afraid one of us would pass out due to lack of oxygen. Resting my forehead on hers, I caressed her cheek and smiled when she took in a shuddering breath. Her hand came up and pushed on my shoulder slightly. "Your life doesn't lend itself to relationships."
Taking a step back, I grabbed her hand and went to the couch. Sitting down, I pulled her into my lap. "I've been doing a lot of thinking, Steph. My life doesn't make relationships easy, but I believe I could make it work, that we could make it work. I know I've pushed you away numerous times and I'm truly sorry. I was wrong. I thought I could live without you or simply keep you at arm's length, but I can't. I need you like I need air, Babe."
She watched me, her blue eyes running a gamut of emotions and confusions. I tried to be patient while she figured out what she wanted to do, but my heart was pounding in my chest. I'd never felt as vulnerable or bare as I did in this moment.
"I won't survive the heartbreak if you push me away again. Please Ranger, we can stay friends, but I won't be able to take that kind of pain from you again. I won't survive it." Her eyes were welling up with tears, twisting a knife into my gut as I was reminded of how deeply I had hurt her.
"I can't promise that it'll be easy, but I can promise I want to try a real relationship with you if you can trust me with your heart. I'm not going to give you any kind of excuse or push you away." As a tear slid down her cheek, I winced, but wiped it away wanting to stay in contact with her while also easing her pain.
Letting out a soft breath, she wrapped her hand around my neck. "I've cared for you for so long. I tried not to and then tried to just keep it at friendship just so I could have you in my life. I'm afraid of what you can do to me."
"Give me a chance to prove to you that I want to change, that I want to man up and be everything you need. Please. I know I told you that I loved you in my own way and I do, but my way is with my whole heart. I do love you, Stephanie." I felt like I was begging but I didn't care, I didn't think I could take it if she would deny me.
She smiled and nodded. "I've loved you for so long, but it's going to take me some time to believe you."
I pulled her to me again, wanting to kiss her out of relief and devotion. She opened her mouth for me when I traced the seam of her lips with my tongue. We both moaned in delight and shock as our tongues met and dueled. I wanted to pick her up and carry her into the bedroom, but wanted to take more time to reassure her. "I promise Steph, I'll make sure you'll be able to believe my love. I'll make up to you all those times I hurt you."
Shaking her head, she placed a gentle kiss on both my cheeks. "You don't have to make anything up to me, just don't do it again."
Nodding, I picked her up and situated her so that she was straddling my legs. My fingers traced up her arms as our eyes met and we sat looking into each other's eyes and hearts for endless minutes. I had no idea what the night or the future had in store, but I knew we were in it together and that made everything more than alright.
Author's Note: Rating will be bumped soon.