I want to thank you all so much for being so sweet to me. I didn't think the story would generate that much interest, as I feel I'm such a bad writer.

It means so much to me, the kind response I have received so far. I hope you enjoy this one. Like always, I hope to know your thoughts. Thank you!

Chapter Three

"So... according to what Reddington said, this guy has been under the radar for a while now. We don't know anything other than what Reddington disclosed yesterday. We can only base it around that..."

Habitually Liz kept finding herself glancing at the spot beside her, only to discover once again that Reddington wasn't standing next to her. It was a cruel thing to swallow each and every time she did it; Red wasn't standing there a hair's length away from touching her, hands steepled near his waist and his eyes on her, offering her the moral support and gentle guidance that he gave her like he frequently did at this hour of the morning. In his place instead, was an empty spot of cement and hollow space that made her feel cold inside and uncertain of informing the team on what they had learned of their next target on Red's list.

It was easy to miss Red when he wasn't around, sprouting off information that would assist them. But it wasn't only just his guidance that she found herself missing; It was his general presence in the room and the way she felt more secure with him around. Where the hell was he and why didn't he accept her call?

It was only when everyone was getting ready to leave the Post Office that her phone finally vibrated. Liz felt her entire body relax as she checked the I.D on the call. Nick's Pizza. Reddington had finally gotten the time to call her back.

"It's Reddington," she informed Ressler breathlessly before answering and holding it to her ear. There was so many things she found she wanted to say to him, yet the only sentence that came out coherently was: "Where are you?"

"I'm fantastic today, Lizzie. Thank you so much for asking me. How are you today?" His voice sounded miles and miles away, with a slight tinny air.

Liz sighed heavily through her nostrils and tried to keep herself from shouting. "I wasn't asking you how you were, I was asking you where you are. You were supposed to be here, eight-thirty on the dot, like you are every other morning. What's changed now?"

"A little telephone ettiqute is what you need, Lizzie. I'm surprised they didn't have a course at Quantico on the very subject." Red's tone was condescending, yet playful at the same time.

This was the Raymond Reddington she had dealt with for the past twelve months, and she felt almost relieved that he wasn't acting as aloof around her as he had been before when Dembe attempted to transfer her call over to him.

"You didn't answer my question. Where are you?"

Red didn't reply for a moment or two, but she heard strange fumbling noises in the background. "That one, I'm not too sure of," she heard Red say uncertainly, addressing someone else on the other line that she obviously couldn't see. "The pattern and the tweed is a little too...ancient for someone in their early thirties. How about something a little more stylish and present-day?"

"What the hell are you doing? And... where are you doing it at?"

"I'm in a fabulous little clothing store for women in Florence, Lizzie."

Her head was thrown into a whirlwind of questions. "As in Florence, Italy?"

"Yes."

"You do realize you're meant to be here in Washington, right? You have an ongoing deal with the government. It was the whole part of the arrangement; You stay here, you help us. You always come in the mornings usually."

"Yes, I agreed to help and be of assistance in any way I can, but staying in Washington wasn't part of that agreement. Besides, it's called keeping up appearances. The minute I stop doing that, I am of no use to anybody. It's how I conduct business and do what I do best."

"Right. And shopping in exotic locations is conducive to that, how?"

As she waited for his response, she heard that voice again. It was the same voice she had heard before when Dembe went to notify Red of her call; A woman's mature, low and seductive voice. He wasn't alone in Florence. He was with a woman and, apparently, they were clothes shopping together. How lovely for them.

"Have you found what you were looking for yet, Raymond? Or do we need to spend another droning hour in here?" The woman's voice was familiar to Liz, she had a feeling she had met the woman before, although she couldn't put a face or name to the voice. She heard the woman give out a heavy sigh on the other end of the line. "You know, I'm still waiting for that glass of Champagne that you promised me hours ago. Aging has obviously warped your idea of fun."

Liz closed her eyes and tried to steady her breathing as that same unpleasant feeling hit her again in a cruel wave; A feeling a mixture between jealousy and grief.

"Who are you with in Florence? You're with somebody. A woman. Who is she?" Liz was relieved her voice reflected nothing of what she was feeling in its tone. She sounded neutral, and simply curious... far from what she was feeling on the inside.

"Just an old friend from a very long time ago, Lizzie." His deep tone was impartial and lukewarm. "There were some... loose ends that needed to be cut. I thought it would be easier to take care of them while I was already here in Florence conducting business."

"Call it what you want," Liz muttered, finding her voice again, "Conducting business, cutting loose ends... whatever. Just let me know when you'll be back."

"I should be back in roughly four hours or so. How is everything coming along there?"

"We don't have any leads. It's a dead-end so far."

"I have confidence that you'll find something."

She turned to look behind her shoulder at Agent Ressler, who was hanging around by the opening of the elevator waiting for her, his expression grim, hands on his hips. She dropped his gaze and focused on the floor.

She opened her mouth, about to tell him pleasantly to have a 'safe flight', when she heard the woman's voice again.

"Oh, come on, Raymond," she said with an impatient lilt, "Hang up on the girl already and let's get that Champagne you promised me earlier."

"Oh, I'm sorry I'm such an inconvenience," Liz heard the words forming before she could refrain from them, her voice hard and bitter. "The girl will be hanging up now. Have fun 'conducting business' with your glasses of Champagne and sorting through your shopping bags together."

"Wait, Lizzie, I-"

"Goodbye, Reddington." She hung up, hating how fragile and broken her voice sounded.

She felt like such a foolish idiot. Did she really believe anything would ever happen, even if she went completely out on a whim and had kissed him? Clearly she hadn't been thinking logically at the time.

And damn her for letting herself develop feelings for the man...

It wasn't as if it was something expected. It hit her completely by surprise herself, and threw everything she knew into a state of turmoil. Falling for the man who was a known criminal, someone she worked with... She knew having something of a romantic relationship with Raymond Reddington was more than likely to fail than ever work out between the pair of them in the long run, and yet, she still hoped that deep down he shared the same feelings for her. Liz was already stuck in an emotionally fragile state, after things with Tom turning to ash. It was her own fault for falling for Reddington and letting herself become open to being hurt again. The only person she could blame was herself.

Red wasn't interested in her in the slightest romantically, and Liz was at fault for misreading the signs so hugely. If she hadn't let herself get into this situation, then she wouldn't have been where she was now, stuck reeling with humiliation and a throbbing, deep ache in her heart.

Moisture pooled in her eyes and she quickly wiped all traces of it away on the back of her hand before she approached Ressler. They entered the elevator together and Liz tried to keep her expression as empty as she possibly could.

She didn't want Ressler, of all people, noticing how betrayed she felt inside, how humiliated and rejected. It took all her strength not to just throw in the towel and call it a day. She knew they weren't getting anywhere this morning, no progress was being made, and that it would have only been fruitless in trying without Reddington's help.

If she hadn't made the decision to come into his hotel room in the middle of the night last evening and threw herself at him, things probably would have turned out differently and productive for the crew. Instead, out of her own impulsiveness, she had driven the one secret weapon they had away to Florence on his private jet with some woman Liz wasn't even sure the name of.

And 'The Girl', the term the woman had nicknamed her. What was she, an adolescent?

She let her personal feelings get the best of her and due to it, everyone else was unknowingly paying the price.

She couldn't believe how wrong she had been, though. She had sincerely thought there was romantic interest there between Reddington and herself. She thought it was mutual. Evidently not. And really, if she thought hard enough on last night... she shouldn't have been so blind to it. Red's reaction to her turning up unannounced at his hotel room and kissing him ought to have been a revealing sign. He hadn't wanted her to kiss him, he was unresponsive to it all, and he had dissuaded her against ever thinking anything could have happened between them romantically.

"Lizzie, I don't know if that was such a good idea. I'm... far too old for you. Not to mention this would only be incredibly messy for both of us."

It wasn't exactly the most encouraging response a man could have when a woman kissed him and put herself out there...

How could she have been so stupid and blind to everything?

No wonder he was so eager to get away to Florence with another woman. He wanted absolutely nothing to do with her. He probably didn't want to let her down, so he did it the painless way he knew how, in ignoring her and creating miles and miles of distance between them. Red hadn't even acknowledged the kiss. He just went on as if it had never happened. Now Liz had a clear understanding of why.

"Liz?" Ressler's gruff voice tore her out of her tormented thoughts and she realized they had already reached the ground floor of the Post Office. He was studying her closely. "You feeling okay, Scott?"

Liz didn't trust her voice, so she nodded wordlessly and clasped her hands together in front of her, keeping her eyes fixed on her glossy thumbnails.

"You sure you're doing okay over there?"

She smiled at him tightly and tightened her fingers. "Yeah, I'm good. Thanks for asking."

"No worries. You know, I'm always here if you want to take a load off?"

"Thanks, that means a lot to hear, Don. I don't know what's wrong with me lately. I just have a lot of stuff on my mind that I need to sort through."

"It's been a big year, Scott," Ressler said, "You've had a lot happen to you. Reddington's half to blame on most of it."

Just hearing his name made a sudden stab of pain course through Liz's body, opening the wound again. "It's nothing to do with Reddington. Sure, I'm pissed that he didn't show... but he's done that a few times before."

"Then your ex? Your divorce?"

It was easier to pretend, so she nodded and followed him as they walked out towards where the SUV's were parked. "Yeah, it's Tom. Things are just messy. I'll be fine."

"As I said, I'm here if you need to-"

"- Thanks, Don, but I'm really fine. There's nothing there to load onto you."

Ressler still looked uncertain, but he jerked his shoulder dismissively. "If you say so, Scott..."

"Well, I do say so. Let's drop it." Setting her chin, she strode towards the SUV. "We have work to do. No more chit-chat."

By the end of the day, Liz felt drained and exhausted with keeping up pretense. Just as she had suspected, they found no leads, no connections. It was a dead trail, but she was glad she had work to focus on and keep her occupied for a couple of hours. It was only leaving work that was the hardest part for her, and she was reluctant to leave the office and go home for the night.

When she got in her car and had private time alone, she sagged in the driver's seat and tried to release all the emotions she was feeling at once. It was all so overwhelming. Hot tears pooled in her eyes again and her eyes stung as she blinked them away and began on the short drive home to her empty, welcome-less house that she shared with only Hudson, the dog.

When she got inside and locked the house securely up, Hudson scurried towards her and Liz fell down on her knees in the dimly lit hallway to greet him. It was impossible to feel so unlovable when she had Hudson so happy and energetic to see her. She took in a deep, steadying breath as she wrapped her arms around his long body and pulled him tightly to her, his claws clipping on the hardwood floor.

"Hey, Hud," she breathed unsteadily, unable to shake off the feeling that she had lost something. "How was your day? Mommy had a big, big day and she's feeling so down and upset." Realistically, Liz knew it was ridiculous to feel depressed over losing something she never even had in the first place, but the feeling refused to leave her.

Goddamn Reddington. She should never have let him into her heart, her mind. It was exactly the same sense of numbness she had felt after the big break-up with Tom, if less stronger because she hadn't been Red's wife and it wasn't as if she had him in the first place.

Swallowing down the lump in her throat, Liz forced herself to stand and get Hudson's dinner prepared. She was being more than just ridiculous, and she knew it. For all she knew, Reddington was probably still in Florence, spending time with the undisclosed woman over indulgent glasses of Champagne. They were probably having the time of their lives without a care in the world. Liz probably never even factored into anything, and it had probably always been that way all along.

She was nothing to Reddington. She was probably little more than an afterthought. So why should she let him upset her so much?

As she pulled out a can of dog food for Hudson in the refrigerator, she eyed the bottle of unopened Whiskey she had in there on the shelf. It had been an impulse buy, and strong liquor disgusted her usually. But now, considering how down in the dumps she was, Liz actually found herself tempted to drink the entire bottle and get deliriously drunk. It would be suicidal but a lot of fun. So that was exactly what she decided to do.

She grabbed the bottle, set it on the table, and changed into her comfortable nightgown before returning downstairs to it. Hudson peered up from his bowl and cocked his head at her as she unscrewed the cap and tossed it on the counter. Steeling herself mentally for the sickening taste, she brought the nozzle up to her mouth and took a small sip. The first sip was revolting, but she grew accustomed to the taste after a few more mouthfuls. She then found her way to the sofa and curled up on it with her trusty Jack Daniels bottle and her cell phone in her lap.

After a while, with alcohol buzzing in her system, Reddington rejecting her no longer hurt as much. The strong Whiskey helped spur her on, and with boldness on her side, she dialed his number. Just her luck, it wasn't Dembe who picked up on the second ring. It went straight to the source. It was Red.

"This is new, Lizzie. You have never called me at this hour before. What's happened?" His tone of nonchalance bothered her and she listened carefully to make sure the woman wasn't around lingering in the background before she spoke.

"You're avoiding me. That's why you never showed up for work this morning."

"I have no earthly idea what you're talking about. Where are you? I don't know if it's the connection from where you are, but you sound... terrible. Your words are all garbled and you're slurring. Are you alright?"

"I'm just calling to ask, who the hell do you think you are?"

"I know fair well who I am, Lizzie." His measured, calm voice irritated her even more. "Do you know who you are right now? Do you know who you are talking to?"

"I know who I am. I just don't know who you are."

"Are you drunk, Lizzie? Are you drunk dialing me?"

Liz felt a flush spread over her face. "Um, no. I... I'm not drunk or anything close to it. I just want to know where you get off."

"Get off? Get off... where, Lizzie? Or are you speaking in terms of sexual proclivities?"

This was another side of Red she knew; The naughty one.

"No, I'm not asking about... sex. See, can you really blame me?"

"Blame you for what? You're going to have to be a little clearer so that I can understand you."

"God, I feel like such an idiot."

"Yes, well. Alcohol tends to do that to a person."

"It isn't the alcohol. It's... everything."

"Are you upset about your divorce with Tom? Is that what you are trying to get at, Lizzie?" Concern was evident in his soft, baritone voice. "It's hard to cope? Of course it'll be hard and there will be some trying times ahead of you. But it's just a fact of life, sweetheart. You'll get through it and come out on the other side fine because, despite what you might think or how you are feeling in regards to yourself, you're stronger than you can ever know."

"It isn't about Tom at all. Why do people keep assuming that? This is about you and me, and the fact that you ignoring me makes it hard for me to cope. You're avoiding me over what happened last night, and I'm... I'm sorry I made a huge mistake."

"Just where are you?" She heard the exasperation in his tone. "Where are you drinking? Do you have company with you?"

"I'm home, with Whiskey and Hudson."

"You can hardly count your four-legged pooch as valid drinking company, Lizzie. I was speaking more along the lines of... like-minded individuals such as yourself. Humans."

"There's... no one but myself. No one, but me. Tom's gone."

"Dembe is getting the car ready. I'll be there in roughly fifteen minutes and then you can resume your drinking session with me. Don't leave your house. Not a single step out the front door, do you understand, Lizzie?" His voice was determined yet strangely threatening at the same time.

"No, don't come. Don't get Dembe to get the car ready. I don't want to see you right now."

"Then that's too bad, Lizzie. I'm just gathering my coat, and then I'll be on my way over to you. I'll see you shortly. I already have a key to get in. Stay right where you are."

Liz knew that when Red's mind was made up, there was no way of talking him out of it. So all she could do, was sit and wait.

Hope this one wasn't terrible. Thank you all so much for being so nice, it's so generous of you guys and makes me feel a bit more confident about attempting to write a Red/Liz fanfiction. I hope they aren't too out of character (Liz getting drunk, especially). Thank you!