The sun filtered in through the curtains of the infirmary. It was bright, too bright. She could hear a gentle humming noise but had no idea where it was coming from. Her head felt like it was full of cotton and her shoulder ached badly. "At least I'm not dead." She thought to herself. Trying to sit up proved to be a futile effort, the second she moved it felt as if someone was electrocuting her.

Once she realize that she wouldn't be moving any time soon she tried to search the room. "Did we save him?" Try as she might to look around, there was no sign of Vincent. What she did see was a white mage with a friendly disposition.

"Good to see you awake, it's been a few days! Don't move too much and you'll be okay. Now that you've regained your consciousness we can get on to fixing the rest of you up." The women smiled and placed her hand over Merlin's shoulder, infusing it with white magic.

Merlin could already feel her wounds starting to heal. "Did you happen to know who brought me in?" Her voice was ever so shaky, just enough for the nurse to pick up on it.

"Yes, that man, Vincent I believe?" She thought for a moment. "Yes, that was his name, alright! It's a good thing too. I don't know what you were doing but you need to be more careful. You lost a lot of bloods and those were some serious injuries." Her voice was more concerned than chastising.

As the woman worked on, Merlin had some time to think. It hurt a bit that Vincent wasn't here but she was sure he had his reasons. After all, she should be grateful enough that she rescued him, and was still alive to appreciate it. "I shouldn't be too greedy."

As time ticked by and the hours passed on Merlin drifted to sleep. Her dreams were scattered nightmare of a life she left behind long ago. Flurries of images passed through her brain. All of them showing different incarnations of the same events. Suddenly, she was jolted out of sleep by a gentle hand on her head. Crimson eyes peered down at her, the room was dark.

"Vincent?" Merlin questioned, before taking his hand and placing it to her face happily.

The man did not move but nodded. He seemed deep in thought. Trying to find the right way to convey his disappointment. He shifted uncomfortably moving his hand gently away from her.

Merlin frowned, "Is something wrong?" her voice was reproachful. A sudden anxiety washed over her.

"We need to talk, about what happened." He sighed deeply. "We need to talk about a lot of things…"

"What do you mean?" She feinted ignorance but her body tensed as she forced a smile. "N-nothing happened. I saved you. We're okay now!"

"Please don't lie to me."

His eyes pierced through Merlin, "I mean I had a little trouble, but it's not like it matters since you're here n-."

"You didn't give me a choice." His voice was flat as he cut her off. He moved closer, knowing just his encroachment could intimidate her. "I also saw what you did."

"I figured you'd want to stay here… With me." She looked like a kitten backed corner. "And about what happened… It was necessary, I just wanted to-"

He shook his head. "…but you didn't consider my feelings." He closed his eyes and breathed out slowly. "You knew I wanted to go back, but you kept me here."

"I just figured it'd be better here! Your future is so lonely…" She couldn't bear to look at him.

"But it was mine." He closed his hand before opening it again. As if both physically and metaphorically he letting something go. "Now I'll never be able to..."

"You don't need to. We can start over here! Things could be different for you. We could be happy…together."

"That's not the point." He paused, "The point is you didn't care enough to give me a choice."

Merlin was starting to feel rather defensive. While she knew it was true deep down, she couldn't admit it. "I almost died to save you." Her voice was strained as she tried to keep herself from crying.

The look he gave her was so cold and unforgiving she wondered if she was seeing the same man. "I saw what you did. Those wounds are my bullets." Without remorse he continued. "Had I not spent so much time with you…" He trailed off but it was very clear his meaning.

Stars sparkled in the window near them, but the darkness was oppressive. Merlin could almost taste the oncoming tears. "But I had to… And it's not like wasn't the logical choice." The devil speaking in between her words.

Vincent shook his head. "You knew it would have hurt me, but you did it because you could." He grabbed her chin forcing her to look into his eyes. "I know you."

Merlin shook her head away and he let go. The amount of emotions swirling around inside her made one eye seem slightly off from the other. "So what..." Her voice was heavy, thick with the deeper part of herself she couldn't easily control. "It's not as if it was ever you who did anything wrong in the first place… It was always her. She's the one to blame!" Shivering while the tears started she managed to spit out "I love you." Before the devil took over again. It smiled bearing her teeth "It's not it would have mattered. Always I knew in the back of my mind… SHE would be the one you pined over~. You're just like the rest. There was never a place for me. Never a place for us!"

Vincent grabbed the girl firmly by the shoulders. His voice was low, and calm. Too calm, the kind that sends chills down your spine. "Merlin, maybe I could have loved you." Silence hung in the air, it was maddening and thick enough you could choke. "…But because of this… I don't want see you again."

Some integral part of Merlin snapped at that moment. Whatever it was that had been keeping her remotely sane for the last few years withered away and died. Laughter echoed through the mostly empty room. "So that's it then?" Her hands reached for her hair. "That's just so funny~! Hehehehehe HAHA." Unnaturally she tilted her head towards him. "I knew it was too perfect~! Not even a monster really could love a devil~!"

Her words stung and her idiotic display had pushed the man over the edge. "You're right. No one could." It was so matter of fact Merlin stopped her incessant cackling. Using the last ounce of control and common sense he had to leave. It was better than deal with the screaming of a lunatic.

Merlin's head slumped, it took her a moment to realize the mistake she had just made and what this all meant. What her stupidity on multiple levels had just cost her. Everything she had strived for, her ever reason for being was gone. There was nothing, she was nothing.