Title: Stalker 3/?
Author: Forsaken2003
Pairing: S/X
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I own none, all belong to Joss Whedon
Comments: Always welcomed!
Summary: After moving to Scotland Xander ends up with a stalker.
Warnings/Spoilers: Post NFA
Beta'd by: Unbeta'd
Prompt #473 from tamingthemuse- Feculent
Note: From now on most of my tamingthemuse stories will be named as the challenge.
Note 2: For the challenge 'Feculent' I'm using it as the meaning of dirty.
"Why do we keep coming to this theatre?" Spike complained. "The floors are always so bloody feculent!"
Xander wasn't sure what feculent was but if it meant sticky he agreed. "The other one wasn't playing Blade: Trinity."
"And it would have been a shame to have missed that," Spike said sarcastically as they made his way to his car.
Xander punched him in the arm. "Okay, so it wasn't the best Blade movie but it was still good. But Ryan Reynolds was hot. I don't usually like beards but he is an exception."
Spike immediately stopped walking. "What?"
"What?" Xander asked. He stopped and looked at Spike confused. Spike was just staring at him. "What?"
"You said Ryan Reynolds was hot," Spike answered.
"I did?" Xander said anxiously. "I meant Jessica Biel."
Spike raised his eyebrow. "I don't remember Jessica's character having a beard."
Xander cursed in his head. "Okay fine. I'm gay," he confessed. "I like the penis more than the vagina. Happy? Look, Spike. You're the only person who knows this and I'd really like it to stay that way." Xander knew it was a lie who ever that called him and broke into his apartment also knew. "I'm just now accepting it and I don't need the girls to throw me a coming out party or something."
Spike had a bemused smile. "You played it well. I'm good at see this kind of thing. I knew Red was playing for the other team the minute I saw her and Tara together for the first time."
"I didn't know the entire time. It wasn't until…" Xander stopped. "It doesn't matter. Can I trust you?"
"You are my best friend, Xan. Of course you can trust me," Spike replied earnestly. "And I have no doubt that you know that I've experiment… with Angeles. So if you ever need someone to show you the ropes of gay sex feel free to ask me." Spike leered at him.
Xander shivered at the thought of Spike really meaning at. His eye traveled down Spike's body. He had no doubt that Spike could teach him a thing or two.
Spike was aware that Xander was giving him a look over. A smile appeared on his lips. Xander was interested. How…interesting. "Let's get you home to bed."
"Nice try, buster!" Xander laughed. "Taking me to the movies where I paid for everything including the pizza is not going to get you into my pants."
"I did pick you up and I'm dropping you off," Spike tried. All he got from Xander was a snort. "So if I pay next time I'll be able to get into your pants?" He asked hopefully.
Xander smiled. "I guess you'll have to pay for the next one to find out, won't you?" He climbed into the car.
"Challenge accepted," Spike murmured before get in as well.
When Xander got to his apartment he noticed a package on his door step. Confused he picked it up and unlocked his door. He sat down on the couch and pulled his knife out and cut the box open. Carefully he pulled out the contains and frowned. Inside was the first and second Blade movies.
The phone rang. Distracted Xander answered. "Hello?"
"I see you got your present."
Xander dropped the DVD's as he stood up. "You were in my apartment," he accused.
There was a laugh. "I was. It's a nice place." There was a pause. "How was Blade: Trinity? And don't you think it's a little cliché to go to a vampire movie with a vampire?"
"How do you know I went to the movies with Spike? And what are you talking? Vampires aren't real," Xander said anxiously. "You're crazier than I thought!" Xander thought he heard teeth grinding together.
"Do not call me crazy! I am not crazy! You're the one crazy for going out in public with a disgusting beast!" The stalker yelled. "I don't want you hanging out with him anymore."
As terrified as he was Xander was not going to put up with being told what to do. "Listen hear freak-o! Spike is my friend and I will hang out with him whenever the hell I want to!"
"Don't make me angry, Xander. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry," the voice said before hanging up.
Xander gulped and hung up the phone. He then picked up the DVD's took them to the kitchen and threw them in the garbage. What the hell was he going to do?