Song 3: Path to the Precipice

Ubi caritas et amor, Deus ibi est.

Congregavit nos in unum Christi amor.

I woke up with my face in a damp white pillow. That's strange, I don't remember coming here. I remember coming from the graduation party with Clara to visit Joshua's grave…

The grave.

I rolled over, and had to squint against the light. There was a fiercely bright lamp overhead. I could smell alcohol in the air- I was in the hospital? How did I…?

"Oh thank the Lord, you're awake!" my aunt came in with a nurse. "How do you feel, Melody? Does anything hurt? Aiyah, your mother would have a fit if she saw you like this! Do you have any idea how scared I was when that young priest brought you in here?!" Priest? Oh, maybe it was that angelic young man that saved me last night.

"I'm fine, Aunty, although breakfast would be nice," I replied. I took a breath, steeling myself for the answer I knew would come with my next question. I already knew the truth, but hearing someone else say it felt like there was no more hope. "…Aunty, where's Clara? I, I went with her last night to Bunhill and…" I couldn't see anything, I didn't have my glasses, but I could feel something changing, like the atmosphere got heavier. "Aunty?"

"Melody…I don't know how to tell you this, but…Clara was found stabbed to death in front of Joshua's grave. I'm sorry, I know she was your best friend, and to end like that…" Aunty said. Her voice was quiet, but full of regret. I guess I can be thankful that she at least wasn't dripping sympathy. I would be hearing more of that soon.

I could feel tears pricking at my eyes. She was gone. She would never come back, and the only time I will ever see her is in a picture, or when I die, hopefully… I prayed that she had no foolish friends or family that would try to resurrect her. I resisted the urge to cry, though. Clara always used to smack me when I did that, saying she hated watching people cry. "It's…it's for the best, I guess. At least she and Josh are together now…"

"They had the funeral today, while you were recovering." Aunty told me.

"Oh…"

"Miss, if you could turn this way, I'm going to give you a checkup to see if you're fit to go." The nurse said, using a stethoscope to check my breathing and heart rate. "Breathe deeply…yes, that's good. Are you in any pain anywhere?" She began to prod me in various places. I shook my head. "Alright, you seem to be fully recovered. You're free to go."

"Thank you," I didn't get up just yet though.

"We could go visit the grave later, when you are discharged. They're doing an investigation to try to find out what happened." Aunty told me. "They think she killed herself, but they couldn't find a weapon."

"…I think I should wait on that, Aunty. I don't want to tempt fate. I would like to go somewhere first, though."

"Where would that be, Melody?" Aunty asked. Was it just me or did I hear suspicion in her voice?

"Do you know of an ancient castle or parliament building on a moor somewhere around London?" I asked her.

"…Melody, what's this all about? There is one but it hasn't been used for years..." Aunty said.

"I heard it was converted into a chapel or something recently…The priest that brought me in here saved me last night-"

"Saved you?! From what?! Were there hooligans in the cemetery?!" Aunty nearly squawked.

"It's…Aunty, do you think demons exist?" I could feel my face heat up but I knew I wouldn't blush. I started feeling around for my glasses and found them on the nightstand. They were a bit cracked but I could still see out of them, thankfully. Aunty had a suspicious expression.

"...Yes, demons exist. I have seen them, and so has your mother, when we were children. That amulet that used to belong to your grandmother has saved us before. Is there something you aren't telling me, Melody?" Aunty asked as I finally got out of bed.

"Yes, there's something I can't easily say in here…can we go back to your house please? There's something I need to ask about." I get the feeling she knows something. Hopefully I can find my answers.

We rode back to Aunty's house on a horse-drawn carriage. Aunty was probably feeling as impatient as I was. As soon as we got through the door, she locked it and closed the windows, sitting me down in the kitchen while she tensely got breakfast on the table. "Alright Melody, what really happened last night? You were there when Clara died and she doesn't seem like the kind of girl that would kill herself in front of her best friend." She slid a plate full of syrup-covered waffles with eggs and sausages in front of me, for which I was thankful. It was ten in the morning and I was very hungry.

I ate a bit to stall for time. "I…I saw a fat man that looked like a goblin last night. He performed some kind of ritual with Clara. Joshua came back as a monster. He could speak for himself but not control his movements. He killed Clara." I told her the short version, not wanting to remember it myself. It hurt to remember, it hurt worse to say it out loud. It was such an ugly, ugly thing to happen to a deceased person.

"…How did you survive then? I think I know what monster you're thinking of, and only the very lucky or blessed ever escape with their lives." Aunty said. I could hear suspicion creeping into her voice again. No, not just suspicion, there's worry too. As though she thinks there's something else I'll do.

"I was saved by…a young man. I don't know who he is. I just remember a lot of white, it reminded me of an angel's wings, gentle, but fiercely radiant. I never got to thank him. He sent Joshua on and scared off the fat goblin man… and then said something about this place here." I was more guarded with my words. You know that tone you hear from your mom or dad when you think that whatever you say next, they'll try to say no to? That's what I heard in it.

"The Black Order." Aunty said suddenly. "Your saviour is probably from the Black Order. My goodness, what a cruel joke…and I supposed this is the place you wanted to go to, right?" She had a sour smile on her face.

"Yes, I want to go there. But what is the Black Order? You don't seem very happy about it…"

"Of course I'm not. I support them from afar, for I am wealthy and can make charitable donations to them. But I also know, thanks to your grandmother, far more than I should about the place. They fight demons like the one Joshua turned into…but as far as I know, if you are found suitable to be one of their warriors, you may never see your family again." Aunty said gravely. I gulped. That was…daunting.

"But surely you can choose…right?" I asked her, getting caught up in the moment.

"They say you can, but the truth is that you have no choice. I suspect your grandmother's amulet is actually a talisman to fight off the demons with. If you've woken it up, it doesn't matter which path you take, it will all go to the same place. If you join them, you will be their warrior until you die, and most of them die young. If you don't, you will attract demons to yourself, and you'll have to fight them anyways. The only difference is that you will die faster if you're alone." Aunty spoke as though she were listing facts, but through the deadness in it, I could hear hurt, and fear. Was she afraid of the Black Order? Or was she worried about something else?

"Aunty, let's figure it out when we get there. They are still part of the Church, so surely they aren't heartless. I'm not even sure I can join, never mind what I want to do. All I want to do is find the young man who saved my life, and thank him," I said, hoping to forestall any more bad news. That, and I could use some solace…a Church is a Church, and goodness knows I need a place to get over the loss of my best friend. I finished the last of my breakfast and went to wash my dishes. "Aunty, can we go today, please?"

"I feel like this will possibly be the last time I ever get to see you, but I also know there is no stopping you when you get that look in your eyes. We'll go after lunch, once we pick up your suitcase from the university." Aunty said. Her voice was moody, and she's really unhappy about this…did I do the right thing by asking for this?

I shouldn't be second-guessing myself like this. I promised Clara that I would try to fix this indecisiveness I have. I can't allow myself to be weak-spirited like this or I might do something stupid- that is if what I'm trying to do right now isn't an idiot's venture.