3. Lust Under the Stars

Jagger's POV

I could feel the vein pumping in her neck. Her blood smelled so delicious and exotic. She felt so warm and delicate in my arms. Knowing she was here beside me made me smile bigger than I already was.

"Raven, I love you," I whispered softly in her ear.

"Jagger, I—I can't love you." Those four words filled me with so much pain. Pain that I couldn't handle, pain that—

I shot up, banging my head. I looked up and realized I was lying in my coffin in Trevor's basement. Those words and that moment were all just a dream. She will never be in my arms; I will never brush against her ear with whisperings of words, I thought to myself.

The villain. That is all she has known me as. All she will ever know me as. No matter how much I take care of her, she'll just see me as the asshole that always went after Alexander, trying to tear them apart to hurt him. And maybe it started that way, but how could I let someone like him have someone as amazing and brave as her. She's always fought against me, just to be there for him. How could he abandon someone like that? She would've given her life for him

I cracked open the lid and realized that it was still light out. Well, I can't get up yet. Unless I wanna fry, I would have to be tormented by these thoughts for the rest of the afternoon. I frowned, knowing I should not have been throwing myself a pity party at the moment. Raven needed me and I couldn't let my feelings get in the way. But I had to admit it was extremely unfair that Trevor was able to be with her day and night. Just the same as with Alexander, Raven could never spend daylight hours with me.

I might as well try to get a few more hours of rest and stop thinking about this shit. I then let unconsciousness overtake my mind.

When I awoke, I knew it was night time. I pushed the coffin lid up and quickly dressed in a white tee-shirt that stated I Bite in black lettering and a pair of dark grey skinny jeans. As soon as I was dressed, I drank a vial of blood and focused on Raven's scent.

I soon caught it and followed the sweet scent, unlike any I had smelled before, to her. When the scent was overpowering, I found myself standing at the gate of the cemetery. Considering what happened last night, I thought it was strange that she would be here. No matter how strange the location though, I hopped the gate and began my journey towards her.

I found her lying beneath the old willow tree located near the baroness's burial area. She looked gorgeous. She was dressed in a black corset with purple lacing and a black micromini. I expected to see Trevor, but he was nowhere in sight. Weird, he's been following her around like a puppy.

"Hey, where's your little guardian?" I teased. She bolted up and looked at me in shock. Obviously not having heard me come up. "Raven, are you okay?" I asked, slightly concerned.

"Um, yeah, yeah I'm fine," she seemed not to be here at the moment. Kind of distant. "Trevor's out with his soccer buddies."

"If you want me to go I will," I said cautiously.

"No!" she said sharply. "I mean, don't go. I don't mind your company," she gave me a small, melancholy smile. I walked closer, slid down the trunk of the old willow, and sat beside her.

"Are you alright, like really alright?" I know she probably didn't like the interrogation and repeated questions, but I had to make sure she was okay. It's what I promised Alexander and even without that promise I cared about her.

"Yeah, I'm really okay. Trevor's buddies still accept him as a god," she giggled. It was only slightly surprising after that run in with the cheerleader last night. But he had changed his appearance and they had always mocked Raven for that same style. It was irritating, but it's not like there's anything we could do to change it.

"So, you decided to lie under the stars? Can I join you for a while?"

Raven's POV

He flashed me that sexy grin of his. I couldn't deny that it made my heart almost skip a beat. Almost. Today had been kinda hectic and I was glad to have someone to take comfort in.

"Of course, you can. The stars tend to calm me," which was why I chose to lie here. Underneath my favorite tree, in my favorite place, with the beautiful night sky to shine on me. How lucky Jagger was to be a creature of the night.

"Something happened today. I can tell. What's wrong?" I could see all of the concern in his eyes. Why did he care for me?

"Nothing big I guess. I was alone, thinking about Alexander, I kinda broke down. Again." I guess being out here was how I threw my own pity party. I sighed. I was such a brat sometimes. Well, most of the time.

"What caused the breakdown? You can tell me whatever you need to. You can trust me," Jagger really was a good guy. Even through everything that had happened in the past, he wasn't so bad.

"I—I guess it was just that Trevor was trying to get me to hang with his crowd and he was telling me how much it mattered to him, especially since he cared about me. I stormed off and started thinking about how Trevor would never utter those words if Alexander were still around. But he's not around! And he's not going to be. I just wish I could stop being this big baby that can't handle when someone tells me that they care! I wish I could get him out of my head! I wish it would all just stop." I was so angry at myself and everything was coming out to Jagger. "I feel so useless and fragile when he tells me stuff like that. I wish I could handle it without breaking down or blacking out! I don't mean to, but when stuff like that is said all I can think is how Alexander should be the one saying it. Why can't I be normal? Why do I have to feel like shit all the time? What's wrong with someone liking me? Why can't I move—"

My words were cut off as Jagger pressed his lips to mine. They were soft and comforting. But I quickly pulled away.

"Wh—what the hell was that?" I started to get angry, but not at Jagger. I was furious at myself for the fact that I had liked it. I had liked it. Yesterday, Alexander left me, and today I'm kissing Jagger. What is wrong with me?

"How else was I supposed to get you to shut up," that mischievous grin danced on his lips. God, that smile. Those eyes. Then his smile faltered, concern and longing filled his eyes. "Why can't you see that nothing is wrong with you? You get worked up and your heart is broken. You're allowed to break down. You were in love, it happens. I know it's hard to let someone in, but Trevor and I both are here for you. Forgive and forget. And although I really, really, hate admitting this, Trevor is obviously head over heels for you. I can also see the smiles you give him and how comfortable you are with him. There is something between you two. And you don't have to be ready for him right now, but you may someday. He just needs to understand that," he looked away. It was obvious to me that he cared about me too and that kiss wasn't just to shut me up.

"Why are standing up for Trevor when I can see in your eyes the same emotions that fill him? Sure, he likes to express his more, but don't think I didn't feel what was in that kiss. And you wouldn't have come here if it weren't for the fact that you cared," I don't know why I was bringing this up to him. I mean he obviously wanted me with Trevor and why didn't I just accept that and move on? Sure, I liked the kiss, but that doesn't mean I like him, does it?

"Raven," all the hurt and compassion in that one word made me ache, "can't you see that you would just be better off with him? Plus, you probably don't even want to be in a relationship with a vampire ever again. He can be there for you day and night. I can't! I'm the useless one! Promising to protect you was just stupid on my hand. Of course, he knew I would fall for you! No wonder he asked me to protect you! I'm just some stupid vamp that would gladly take up the position! There isn't any place for me in your heart and I knew that even before accepting. Why was I so stupid?!" he slammed his fist against the willow, making leaves rustle above. I could tell he wasn't angry at me, but angrier at himself for liking me. What had he said about a promise though?

"What promise? What are you talking about?" Jagger had mentioned someone several times. Slowly, Jagger turned to face me completely. I spotted fear in his eyes before he dropped his head into his heads.