Hello again to those, wow eight followers, I'm weirdly proud to have any. So this is the first group outing with the main cast. I was a little nervous to write group dynamics but hopefully I've at least managed to keep who's speaking to whom clear. We're still going to follow Konosuba's plot for another two chapters, I'm planning to have the plot start diverging more in the fifth chapter.
*Chapter Start*
"… So, as I was saying we're on a quest to kill five giant toads, this ones' only strong suit is healing magic and I'm the weakest class, so we're looking to gather a party."
"Alright that's good to know but are you sure it's okay to leave your partner on the floor like that?"
"Everybody's used to it by now."
"I don't think that makes it okay."
I had been wondering why no one intervened, from the sounds of it no one even got out of their seats. This boy, Kazuma just continued his recruitment pitch where he left off, he barely even reacted when she demanded he protect her purity. How is everyone used to this already and why isn't anyone bothered by what she just said?
"Giant toads huh? They don't sound like they're worth much, how are you splitting the reward?" Ignoring the issue, I instead ask about his offer.
"We get 100,000 Eris ̶ "
What self-respecting goddess has a currency named after her?
" ̶ for the job and 5000 for each additional toad we slay, we'll split the reward evenly between the group, so far we've got this girl who says she's an archwizard ̶ "
"It's not this girl it's Megumin." the girl next to me interrupts.
I hear Kazuma stifle a laugh at the mention of her name, I'm vaguely aware that Megumin is an unfortunate name to be give a child, but when I compare it to names like "Valdamjong" and "Zelretch" it just doesn't stand out.
" ̶ this one who can heal and serve as a distraction ̶ "
The party's healer is still making sniffling sounds from the floor, but she seems to be calming down, I'm starting to feel a little bad after hearing that reaction, I really hadn't meant to scare her this much.
" ̶ and me who can… well… I have a sword."
I can hear him drawing his blade from its scabbard as he no doubt attempts to display his sword to me. After an awkward pause and the sound of the blade being returned to its scabbard Kazuma picks up the conversation where he left off.
"So now that I've explained everything, may I ask you a couple of questions?" He sounds like he's trying to sound nonchalant.
"…is it about the blindfold?"
"It's about the blindfold?... Oh, and your class, abilities and nationality would help too."
"So, the blindfold ̶ "
"Well Kazuma allow the intelligent and kind Aqua to explain ̶ " Okay I guess she can explain it " ̶ this former megane needs that blindfold to protect the innocent from his disgusting eyes." Alright I guess I deserved that one for threatening her.
"…That pretty much covers it, I'll take it off during fights." I resignedly agree with the goddess
As vague as her explanation is, she isn't technically wrong. I'm not sure why she seems to have regained her confidence so quickly, maybe she just likes lecturing people. Hopefully Kazuma will accept her vague explanation, I don't think he'd react well if I told him that I can see death everywhere. I'll probably have to explain it to him, no one would be satisfied with that explanation, let alone when recruiting party members.
"I see, I see so about those other things…" That was enough?
"Alright then, I'm an assassin. I'm still at a low level so I can only use 'hide' and 'detect enemy'."
"I see, I see and where was it you come from again?" He asks.
I haven't said, based on his line of questioning he's probably already knows. Well in that case there's no harm telling him, with a name like Kazuma he's probably the same.
"I can from some far-off place called Japan, the name's Shiki Tohno, I'll be in your care."
/-/
Kazuma seems to be excited to meet someone from his own world, given the eccentric personalities of the locals I don't really blame him. After Megumin and I agreed to form a part with him we set out to complete our embarrassingly easy quest. I'd been planning to avoid groups when I arrived here, but this seems like a good opportunity to speak to someone else about being pulled over to this world, considering that he chose to bring a goddess with him he's probably more informed than most. I've been trying to ask him about it, but he's busy bonding with Megumin over exaggerated tales of his past adventures.
He's about to finish recounting an epic battle fought in some online RPG, like most of his stories it involves him singlehandedly carrying a party through a difficult raid and definitely isn't an exaggeration. Based on the awe in her voice I think it's safe to say Megumin is under the impression that he's going to be carrying this party. After he finishes his latest story Megumin excitedly runs ahead to 'show us the true power of explosion magic', without anyone else willing to listen to his stories Kazuma and I start discussing our respective attempts to take advantage of our 'cheat items'. It seems his plan backfired far worse that mine did, rather than gaining some flashy item marking him as a legendary hero he's taken on the responsibility of caring for an easily distracted priest.
"So Tohno what kind of games do you have experience with?"
"Well I've played a couple of stories at with Arihiko and a few of his friends but we couldn't really get into it. Arihiko's not a very good DM" He kept adding in over levelled enemies so that he could 'win' the game, everyone playing gave up when it was clear we wouldn't make it out of the first room.
"Wait that sounds like a table top game I meant online stuff, you know like 'Elder Tale'."
"Yeah, I've been meaning to ask you about that, Kazuma what year is it?"
"2013."
"Ah I see… when I died the year was 2001."
" ̶ Eep"
As I spoke we both turned to glare in the direction of the suspiciously quiet goddess who had sidled up next to Kazuma during our conversation, well Kazuma glared I just kind of turned to face her and scowled.
"Hey, hey Aqua, what's this guy talking about huh, how long have you been abducting teenagers for? Why hasn't anyone stopped the demon king yet if you're just handing out cheat items to millions of Japanese boys?"
It's a good thing Megumin ran ahead, I'm not sure how we would explain the concept of parallel worlds to someone who grew up in a medieval society, I guess they would have some sort of fantasy equivalent of the concept, possibly even the one that brought us here. Turning back to the goddess who is somehow being picked on by a teenage boy I speak up in her defence.
"I don't think they've brought over that many people Kazuma, I only arrived a few days before you did which means that either the year we died doesn't affect our arrival or the esteemed Aqua-sama has screwed up."
She lets out an indignant squawk at that last remark before she responds.
"I didn't screw anything up nobody told the esteemed Aqua-sama ̶ " Don't turn it into a compliment " ̶ that she was speaking to the concubine of the 'White Princess', if he can seduce a true ancestor then what if he turns his seductive wiles on the beautiful Aqua-sama?"
"… wait, is that why you freaked out when you saw me again?"
"Why else would anyone be afraid of you?"
…All of my guilt for threatening you, give it back, give it all back.
"Alright, so when you said I had disgusting eyes ̶ "
"Hey, hey is what she said before true, are you dating some beautiful rich girl who can cover all your expenses? Did you get to live a luxury in some princess' palace your whole life?" After remaining silent throughout a speech hinting at the existence of beings that a goddess would find intimidating, Kazuma finally starts asking questions. I don't think I like his priorities.
"…Aqua can you explain the time difference?" I attempt a reassuring smile as I force the conversation back onto the topic of my summoning.
"Ah, there was a clerical error, you weren't supposed to come here." the smile falls from my face and she pauses sounding less certain when she resumes her speech. "I-It didn't have anything to do with Aqua-sama, I delegated the workload to one of my subordinates, she's the one who caused the mix up."
I take in a shaky breath, if I wasn't supposed to be here in the first place, then is there any guarantee that I can be return to my own time?
"When I return to my world, is it possible to return to the same point I left?"
"… No."
Aqua voice sounds nervous, I hear a scuffle and a few complaints from Kazuma as she tries to hide behind him. I guess I did manage to scare her after all, I doubt she'd be this nervous if she thought I was hitting on her.
More importantly, I've just lost twelve years with my family, worse yet every second I spend here is more time lost. I'm tempted to yell at her, threaten her, maybe I can force her to send me back immediately. The thoughts leave as quickly as they came, leaving only guilt at my own viciousness. I doubt she'd be here if she could just send people back, even then it's not really fair to yell at Aqua for this situation. If she hadn't made the mistake of bringing me here, then I would have died. I'd have died without having the chance to say goodbye to anyone, not Akiha, nor Hisui, nor Kohaku, nor Arihiko. I would even lose my chance to find Arcueid.
"When Kazuma kills the demon king, I can return you to your world, so if you want to go back, just help Kazuma defeat the demon king." Oblivious to my inner turmoil Aqua blatantly offers me her self-serving advice.
"Well when you put it like that ̶ "
"EXPLOSION!"
My words are cut off by the sound of an explosion and its preceding battle cry, an instant later we're buffeted by a sudden shockwave caused by the detonation. Draping my blindfold around my neck, my eyes are drawn to a column of fire and smoke rising from the ground twenty metres ahead. Given what little I've heard from Megumin today I think it's safe to assume she's the cause, the real question is why she would need to cast such a powerful spell?
Before I can say anything to either of them Kazuma and Aqua sprint ahead, they're probably planning to rescue their new party member, it's what any hero worth the name would do. My agility stat is higher than theirs', if I ran ahead I could probably get to Megumin first. I steel myself as I turn away from the pillar of smoke in the distance and run to higher ground, if those two are already dashing towards her then someone should hang back to survey the area. I find a hill near the site of the explosion and dash up it to gain a better vantage point. I take stock of my allies' positions and examine our enemies, based on my observation I've determine that the situation looks dangerous if a little comical.
Megumin, at least I assume that's her, is lying face down on grass, she's slowly sliding downhill as an oversized toad hops towards her, even from here I can feel the earth shake with each weighty hop. Kazuma, I'm assuming based on the tracksuit that's him, is running towards her shouting obscenities and waving a sword above his head, something about his form makes me doubt he knows how to use it.
Rather than support her allies the parties' healer 'wisely' opts to instead charge a completely different toad which doesn't even seem to have noticed them. She closes in on her foe thrusting her staff forward like a spear, as she attacks she yells out the name of what I assume is her signature attack, helpfully adding on that it is 'a goddess's requiem of love and sorrow'. The toad appears impervious to her requiem, ignoring her feelings it eats the attack in far more literal sense than I'd expected. I continue to watch as the toad raises its' head into the air exposing a pair of legs which dangle from its' mouth pointing straight up in the air. Its' lack of teeth leaves the toad with little choice but to inelegantly attempt to swallow her, good, that'll leave me plenty of time to mount a rescue.
Returning my gaze to Kazuma I find him hard at work trying to free Megumin from an identical predicament. To my surprise the toad seems entirely content to take hits as it gradually swallows its' prey. As I observe his efforts I take a moment to appreciate the convenience of 'enemy detection'. If I didn't have it I probably wouldn't have noticed the four toads slowly making their way to the surface. I should probably act quickly, based on Kazuma's current efforts I doubt he'll be able to do much against four toads unwilling to take his attacks.
Crossing the distance with ease I feel a familiar calm come over me, reacting to martial training I've long since forgotten I instinctively plan out my objectives, my first task is to slay the 'Goddess Eating Toad'. Once I'm within five metres of my target a familiar impulse kicks in instructing me to ̶
̶ Thump
Kill it.
Without any need to disobey the instruction I follow it, somersaulting over the toad I land gracefully behind it before poking the point of death located on its back. It expires instantly expelling a mewling goddess from its mouth. Given their size I should probably consider these toads at least a little threatening, their large mucus covered bodies make tracing lines of death a difficult task After what I saw of Kazuma's 'battle' it's entirely possible that the toad would stand there and let me cut its lines, but I don't have the time to test that theory. Leaving a slime covered Aqua on the ground I move quickly to support a still struggling Kazuma. Just as he frees Megumin I race past him eyes already focused on my next target, I'm starting to enjoy this. I vault over a toad as it erupts from the ground beneath me, like the last one I find its' point of death located on the back, I end its' short foray to the surface with a perfectly executed poke. In the background I can hear Kazuma screaming at the sudden attack. His girlish screams continue as I repeat my feat of athleticism and skill twice more claiming two more lives as the remaining toads breach the surface. Turning on my heel, I face the sole survivor of their ill-fated ascent.
Our eyes meet, I glare at the toad which in turn casts me a wary look… at least I think that's what it's doing, it could just as easily be blankly staring ahead. Regardless, I fall into a combat stance switching my knife to a backhanded grip, I keep my eyes focused on the toad overtaken by a rising urge to extinguish this thing, my mouth stretches into a smile. It's not-human, it should die.
Opening its' mouth, the toad flings an oversized and excessively slick tongue in my direction, swaying to the right I evade the attack putting only centimetres between myself and the improvised projectile, as the tongue slides past flecks of mucus fly in my direction catching my cheek. Letting out a low growl I swing my knife at the tongue tracing a line located halfway along its' length, the blade meets no resistance severing it effortlessly. Reacting to the pain the toad retracts what remains of its' tongue. The toads' head rockets backwards as half a tongue slams into the back of its' throat. Taking advantage of the distraction, I close the distance between us. As I close in the toad lowers its' head, mouth opening as it attempts to swallow me whole, I grasp its forehead to gain purchase against its slippery flesh, tightening my grip I vault over the toads' head piercing its' point of death before landing on my feet. I listen with a satisfied smirk as the toad crashes loudly into the dirt. With practiced ease I replace my blindfold in a single motion before turning to greet Kazuma and Megumin.
"Alright then, are you guys ready to head back?"
"Hey, why're you acting all nonchalant about that, what, are you the main character or something? What am I supposed to be then? Am I just going to sit in the background while all the girls have romantic hijinks with you?"
I wait patiently as Kazuma grumbles under his breath before politely coughing to get his attention. He lets out a put-upon sigh before addressing my question.
"Apparently this girl can't move after using a single spell, so someone needs to carry her…"
"I see, I'm feeling a little lightheaded after all of that fighting, I hadn't mentioned this before, but I sometimes suffer fainting spells…" Yeah, that's what's happening. It has nothing to do with uniquely disgusting smell of toad mucus or the audible squelch Megumin makes when Kazuma eventually picks her up.
/-/
"120,000… split between three people, that comes to around 30,000 Eris each… I nearly died for a reward of 30,000." Kazuma says after a moment of silence.
"Well it was a beginner quest and when you think about it four people taking an entire day to kill nine toads is never going to pay out that much."
"Easy for you to say moneybags, you have a princess paying your bills, who's paying mine huh! Where's my ojou-sama!"
"Hey, she wasn't paying all my bills for me" that would be my sister " ̶ and what kind of self-respecting man wants to live off someone else's efforts." Sorry Akiha, I'll make it up to you.
"This one! This one right here!"
What kind of person says that, where's his shame? Honestly he's talking like some kind of shut in. I'd been considering offering them some of the reward from the 'rookie killer' when I realised how we'd earned, that was until Kazuma spent ten minutes complaining that he needs drinking money and whining that he wants someone else pay his bills, after that I thought better of it.
"Hey Tohno, while we're talking… WHY THE HELL DID YOU ABANDON ME OUT THERE!?"
"During the battle?"
"Not then. Why did you suddenly disappear when that explosion freak started spreading rumours about me only to reappear to collect your reward? Not only am I stuck with someone who can only use one spell a day, now women everywhere think I'm a pervert!"
"Eh ̶ you're not!"
"… That's not funny. Because you skulked away your reputations fine while mine's in the gutter, where's the justice? Why do people only think I'm a pervert? Why do you get to be spotless?"
"I think you just answered your own question Kazuma. I'll admit it's as you've said. Faced with a complicated situation I wisely chose to leave this task in the hands of a capable party leader."
"Don't just call me that when your shifting problems onto me."
"When else would I call you that?"
It seems like there's something else bothering him, I can hear him tapping his foot erratically beneath the table. This better not be about my part of the reward, I'm already working for pocket change as it is.
"If you ask to keep my part of the reward money, we will have a problem." I say.
"Huh, what's with the sudden distrust?"
"Well you've been working up the nerve to say something for the last few minutes and Aqua did say you were stingy…"
"What's that idiot saying behind my back! Anyway, that's not what I wanted to ask you. Tohno can I see your 'cheat item'"
I slowly reach into my pockets retrieving the compass and the instructions that came with it. Both are placed down on the table in front of Kazuma, I move my right hand away from the note and but keep my left hand atop the compass.
"Hey, you're acting way too suspicious… you can put them away now." As he speaks I imagine him waving a hand dismissively at the magic artefact.
"So… what was that about?"
"I wanted to confirm that you had the item you told me about earlier before asking my next question. Tohno, how did you kill those toads so easily?"
He continues speaking before I can start making excuses.
"Even if your level's higher than you said those attacks shouldn't have killed them so quickly. If that compass is your 'cheat item' then why was Aqua talking about your 'disgusting eyes' and why did she say that your blindfold's protecting ̶ "
"Alright, alright let me explain myself. Geez where was this perceptiveness when you were getting blackmailed by a thirteen-year-old. Hmm… It'll be easier if I just show you."
Kazuma waits patiently as I step outside returning moments later with a stone about the size of my fist. I sit down before removing my blindfold to examine it, I see six pieces of stone held together by a network of black lines. After finishing my examination, I look up at Kazuma seeing him properly for the first time. His bright tracksuit looks completely out of place in this setting, is that how people dress in the future?
I restrain a sigh when I start to examine him more closely. I'm sure he looks normal enough, probably not very handsome or particularly ugly. A perfectly normal boy with no unique features… all I can see is a patchwork of skin and cloth sewn together in the shape of a person. Needless to say, it's not a very pleasant sight.
"Hey what's with that look? Are you looking at trash? Is that what you're trying to say?"
"No… at least I don't think so… you see this rock?" I hold it up to give him a chance to inspect it.
"Kazuma, everything in existence has an end. There are differences to when, but it's an end nonetheless. Death does not 'arrive'. It is already contained within the object at its creation, and it's bound to happen someday." I recite the explanation Arcueid gave me pausing momentarily to give Kazuma an opportunity to ask any questions, he nods for me to continue.
Casually tossing the stone into the air I sever its' lines of death, continuing its descent uninterrupted it strikes the table and separates into six pieces. The divisions are too smooth and far too perfect to be the result of natural causes.
"If you cut a living being's neck it dies, conversely if you can't cut somethings neck, it won't die. What I'm do is different, ignoring all protections and immunities I kill first. It's an ability I picked up long before I came here."
"How could you learn something like that back in Japan?"
"Oh, I suppose you wouldn't know, magic exists in our world too." I offer him a polite smile, he doesn't return it instead staring at me dumbfounded. He looks ready to ask me a lot of questions before something over my shoulder catches his attention.
"I'm here about the recruitment poster. Ah, I didn't mean to interrupt… you're not going to… haah… scold me in front of this man are you."
The blond-haired knight is addressing a stunned Kazuma, before he can respond I stand up and offer her a friendly smile.
"The recruitment poster? Kazuma here's the one you'll want to speak to about that. I'm going to turn in for the night… have fun you two." Winking at Kazuma I replace my blindfold and saunter away from the conversation, once more leaving a complicated situation in the hands of the capable party leader.
"Wait, Tohno I still need to ask you for dating advice! I want to meet a beautiful noble girl who can pay my bills for me!"
/-/
"Our contract is established."
She extended a hand down towards me.
"I guess I can finally introduce myself now. I'm Arcueid ̶ hmm… my last name is really long, so just Arcueid is fine for now. I'm a True Ancestor type vampire. How about you?"
I'd already accepted my nonsensical situation, even then that airhead still managed to elicit a sigh with her unprecedented introduction.
"I'm Shiki Tohno. Sadly I'm just your everyday student… I've said it before, but I'm really not going to be much use."
I grasped Arcueid's hand. She pulled me up effortlessly letting go of my hand once I was on my feet.
She took a long hard look at me before she offered her hand again.
"Nice to meet you Shiki. I'll have you take responsibility for killing me."
She somehow managed to grin while saying something so ominous.
/-/
… Sorry Kazuma any dating advice from me is liable to earn you jail time.
So was it worth the wait? I didn't think so either.
Figured I'd mention that I'm planning to start writing these on a schedule so the next chapter is going to be posted on the 26th January, hopefully I'll "see" you then.