Okay everyone, sorry for the wait, I was having some trouble with my computer, but, finally, chapter three is up! Clap everyone! Haha

Anyway, just to let everyone know, someone mentioned that their jobs didn't seem to suit their personalities. They aren't supposed to! I mean, it IS a punishment. I wanted jobs that would conflict with their personalities and/or abilities. Just to clear that up.

DISCLAIMER

Me – Twilight, twilight. Where for art thou Twilight? Deny thy author, Stephenie Meyer and refuse thy publishing company and if thou wilt not...

Stephenie Meyer – Twilight is MINE. I have the copyright to prove it!

Me – But, but

Stephenie – And leave the Shakespeare to professionals too. Okay?

Me - sniff FINE!!

Jasper POV

Great! Exactly what I needed. A week not only spent away from my beautiful wife, Alice, but spent with a bunch of emotionally needy humans.

Not only did their blood smell so unbelievably delicious, but I had to help them sort through their mental, ahem, issues.

I had what could be considered the ideal gift for the job. Being able to affect the emotions of others, but don't forget exactly how much I am affected by their emotions as well. This week would very well be an emotional rollercoaster ride. And I had already gone through puberty! Sure maybe it was a few hundred years ago, but still! And I don't even like roller coasters. (Filled with far too many excited and nauseous humans on sugar-highs and adrenalin rushes for my tastes)

I had borrowed Carlisle's car, seeing as I didn't have my own, to drive to the "Hospital for the Emotionaly and Psychologically Challenged" in Seattle.

I stepped into the claustrophobia inducing building. It smelt awful and amazing at the same time. A combination of bleach and other chemical cleaning products and BLOOD.

Blood! Blood! Blood! I heard my thoughts race, out of my control, venom pooling into my mouth.

"Excuse me sir" A short, balding man walked up to me suddenly, obviously unaware that I wanted to suck him dry...pardon my word choice.

"You must be my replacement for the week. Jasper Hale, correct?"

I nodded, Carlisle had informed me that a certain therapist had chosen to take this week of for his vacation to Mexico and I would be replacing him, for the time being.

"Well,heresyourscheduel,yourofficeisdownthehallthirddoorontheleft,lunchbreakstartsat12:30,haveagreatweek,goodluck,gottagobye!" He spoke quickly, hardly breathing, even with my vampire speed it was hard to make out. I understood that my office was to be the third door down on the left, something about a lunch break, and luck.

He thrust a sheet of paper, which I discovered to be a list of patients that would be coming in that week, at me, and fled out the door like a bat out of hell.

I was left standing in the doorway of the building feeling even less optimistic about the challenge that lay ahead of me.

For a therapist, that man seemed a little sick to the head, if you get my meaning. I just hoped I could hold onto as much of my sanity as possible throughout the week.

I glanced down at the schedule, and noticed that my first patient would arrive in less than twenty minutes.

I walked down the empty hall until I reached a door with a black metal sign on it that read "Dr. I.N. Saayne" and a piece of paper below it with the name "Jasper Hale" written on it. I assumed that Dr. Saayne was the one who had just left, and clearly this was the office I was to use.

I couldn't help but notice the irony of his name. Dr. I.N. Saayne – Insaayne – Insane, the connection seemed strange.

I pushed the door open and stepped into the small office. Inside, was a dark brown loveseat that clashed horribly with the red-ish coloured wood of an oversized writing desk, and a white book case. The chair behind the desk was small and blue and looking insignificant in comparison to the desk. Actually, everything seemed insignificant to the desk. It was, by far, the largest thing in the room.

EsmeI thought bleakly. Would have a heart attack, if she saw this room. She would definitely have to speak with the designer. And then end up redoing the entire room, and then the entire office.

After a few moments in the room, I heard a knock at the door and a voice on the other side say "Fine Mom, I'm going see? I'll put up with the therapy, or whatever. I just don't see why I ha-" I cut her off by opening the door.

A tall, thin, teenage girl of about 15 stood outside the door. She had flaming red hair and dark green eyes, although you could hardly see them through eyeliner. Her face was nearly covered in acne and freckles.

"Anna?" I asked.

"That's me." She said blowing a bright pink bubble with her gum.

"So your my first patient, hey?"

"Guess so." She said uninterested and unenthusiastic.

So this was my first patient. Although her emotions weren't too out of control I doubted my first session would go perfectly smoothly. How right I was indeed.

I sat down behind the large desk and gestured for her to have a seat on the couch. I noticed a file with my patients name scribbled on it. Anna Jones. I read the entire document in just a few seconds.

Apparently, her parents sent her to a therapist because of "strange rebellious behaviour". I concluded she was probably your typical teenager.

"So, how are you feeling?" I asked attempting to be inconspicuous.

"Fine, I suppose." She answered.

"Just, fine?" I questioned.

"Well yeah I guess." She said.

"Why?" I asked prying, trying to get her to tell me more.

After a moment she opened up.

"Well. I mean, I thought I was fine. But maybe I'm not."

"What's bothering you?" I asked, noticing there was something else behind her statement. "What's really bothering you?"

And then she exploded, not physically but emotionally. I was almost overcome by a wave of humiliation, frustration, and annoyance.

"What's really bothering me?" she repeated. "What's really bothering me? What's REALLY bothering me is the fact that my parents think I'm psycho and sent me to a therapist! I mean really, what is that supposed to tell me coming from a bald old man who sings songs from the Phantom of the Opera and a crazy woman who dies her hair every few weeks, is addicted to Jazzercise, and looks over her right shoulder every ten seconds like she has a twitch! It's like she thinks there is going to be someone there, leaning over her with a knife of something!"

She took a deep breath, and so did I, although it was unnecessary. I was doing my best to calm her down, but her own emotions were so strong they were affecting me.

"And then they send me to a therapist. Maybe I was a little upset when my boyfriend dumped me for my best friend, but really I'm just your typical, acne-prone, slightly over-dramatic, self conscious teenager. I mean please! I'm really not the crazy one in the family!"

She continued again until she was out of breath. "Wow that felt good!" she said. "I finally have that all off my chest! Maybe coming here was a good idea after all. Thanks Dr. Hale. I'll see you tomorrow!" and she bounded out of the room, as happy as can be, with a little added bonus from me.

And there I was left, speechless, for the second time that day. Well, one patient down, I ticked off in my brain. Although that one was a little strange.

I sat and awaited the next one. I sighed. This would be a long week.

Haha, so there's the third chapter. Review, review, review. If you do I'll...I'll...I'll GIVE YOU CHOCOLATE! Haha, I shall bribe you with chocolate, that always works. Mwahahaha, and soon everyone who reads this will be compelled to review...Even if it's just to get chocolate. MWAHAHAHAHAHA

Okay, you get the point. JUST REVIEW! Jeez...