AN: Murdering me is STILL illegal, so...please don't. Heheh. Enjoyyyy!
~AP

Sock avoided Jonathan since then. Well, he avoided everything and everyone, really. He avoided teachers, he even skipped Phys. Ed and Dance, which Sock would NEVER do. He beat everyone at dodgeball and he knew it, and the boy loved dancing more than the Dance teachers did. But he skipped.

He sat alone at lunch, giving Jonathan a warning glare when he picked up his lunchbox and tried to move. He avoided eye contact with nearly everyone. He's stopped doing homework and work properly, he doesn't socialize. All these things the school told his parents after phoning them up of due concern for the purple-skirted boy.

Then he stopped coming to school altogether. Now, Jonathan got the whole 'We're going to pretend we never knew each other' thing, but there's only so much distance a boy could take, and that was crossing the line of what could be taken and what couldn't.

So that night, after, admittedly, another homework detention, the boy walked himself to Sock's house. Jon's ankle was playing up, since some guys had tripped him over in dodgeball, and his teacher had been genuinely concerned because his ankle wasn't quite normal, but Jonathan walked on it anyway. He didn't really care.

When he finally got there, it would've been about eleven at night. But, to his utter surprise, there was no one there. Just a very noticeable note on Sock's bed. It was in an envelope. It said "To Jonathan" in Sock's familiar messy handwriting.

He couldn't bring himself to read it. He just grabbed it and ran, despite his entire body aching in protest, towards his home. If he'd looked properly, maybe he'd have seen the silhouette stabbing into the glow of the full moon over the graveyard hill. Maybe he could've stopped him.

Jonathan picked up the scribbled note now and opened the envelope shakily, pulling out the crumpled up paper. It was scribbled on the back of a school letter, of course. "Dear Jonathan,
If you're reading this, which I hope to God you are, I'm...Well I'd expect they'd taken me to the morgue by now or something. For the funeral.
Before you cry, scream, call me selfish and fall back into the ways of you before I became proper friends with you, please give me the chance to explain.
I...I killed my parents. In my sleep. I don't even regret it that much. I guess I'm insane, huh? Haha, you always said I was crazy.
Anyway I think you can already guess what type of note this is.
It's a suicide note.
Jonathan, I would stay, I want to be with you, I swear, even if we can't be what we both want to be because of my dumb killing problem. But...well, I realized it's not that I have a killing problem, y'know? I AM the killing problem.
And it's time to dispose of the problem.
I'm sorry. It'll never, ever be enough if I mean half as much to you as you do to me. Never, ever. I know. I'm sorry right now, you're hurting, and it's my fault. I'm sorry that I can't be next to you, cleaning up the mess I've left. I'm sorry I never got to tell you, one last time...
This is my chance, huh? Better use it. I love you, Jonathan. More than me, more than my parents, more than anything, I love you, and I'm sorry.
Remember to get into as much trouble as possible while I'm gone, OK?
Lots of love and weary byes,
Napoleon Maxwell Sowachowksi, (Sock!)

PS: You can have my blanket if you want. And my school notes. I know you were slacking off in history, and we, I mean you have an assessment next week. You'll need them. In fact, take whatever you , if you don't talk at my funeral...Well, you better!"

"So, what was it, honey? Does it tell you how he...y'know, died?"
"Suicide. It was a suicide." Jonathan slipped the letter back into the envelope and hugged it to his chest. "I...He wants me to talk at his funeral." Jon looked up to his Mom. "C-can I?"
"Of course, sweetie. Of course you can. He...He left a note for the hospital, too, and the funeral home. I'd reckon they'd say what the places need to know."

Two weeks later, the funeral came by. None of Sock's family came to his apart from his Great Uncle, who nodded at Jonathan in approval, though the blonde knew not what made him deserve it. The teen was set on ignoring the funeral so he didn't cry, but when he was called up as a 'Special Friend' he couldn't help but angrily return from the detatchment he had placed between him and the world. He stood and as soon as he got on the podium, he looked at the priest and said: "If it makes any difference now, of all times, I was his boyfriend." The room was silent, but has he looked around, most had a slight smile at that.

"I didn't meet Sock until highschool. Crazy, right? I'm stood here in front of old friends, one family member, which I'm still rather miffed about, but anyway, yeah. Most of you've known him forever, and I'm here, only knowing him for what, six or seven years?" Jonathan laughed a little. "Trust me, it felt like so much longer."

"Two years after meeting that little skirted nerd, I formed a crush. A bad, want-to-squeal-every-time-they-speak crush. But I was confused. Real confused. And I asked my Mom, I said: 'Mum...I like this person but it's a boy and I'm supposed to like girls, right'? And she was all like: 'Honey, you can like boys too. A lot of people don't like that, though, so if you say you only like boys, you will go into some raging battle of emotional turmoil and I promise, I will stand by you no matter what, ok?'" Jonathan smiled at his mother. "I'm lucky to have parents so supportive. I could've...Well, I could've had Sock's."

"Ever since we became close enough, we always used each other for comfort. He was protective, that little devil. Someone'd start threatening me and he'd go all up in their face, swearing 'till he was dragged off, screaming threats that I have no doubt in my mind he could fulfill. At first I was embarrassed, but you aren't embarrassed of friends. Never. I began to cherish the attitude he had. He could sass anyone who got in his way. Well, I started to love everything about him, actually. His weird sense of style, his sassines, his forest green eyes, oh I could stare into them all day. And his hair, God, his hair. Nothing could be as soft, as warm, as comforting. Every curve and edge, every flaw, every perfection, every single detail of that boy I loved with all my heart. All of it. I knew how bad his parents treat him. Heck, I know how bad I've treat him. I could make him so happy. And then make him so, so sad. I didn't realize I could change his feelings that quickly, but hey, I thought he didn't care about me. I was wrong."

"We got together just a month back. Only a month, I know. Shame I took so long, huh? And then, a week ago, he said he wanted to break it off 'cause he was too dangerous. He was selfless, he was caring, he was a nerd, he was a lot of things. But one thing he wasn't was dangerous. He gave me all I could ever ask for in a week and then stole it from me again, then took more away in the worst way possible. I don't think I could feel any more pain if I was trying to, you know? I think he underestimated how much I really cared for him. I can't-" The blonde sucked in a breath. "I don't really want to live in a world where I can't see those beautiful eyes, stroke that soft hair, hold his hand, even. Where I can never feel his lips on mine ever again. He'll never laugh again, never smile again. And part of me still thinks it's my fault. That it's my fault that he felt like he was a problem. An issue, needing to be rid of, you know? That maybe if I'd shown how much I really, truly, loved him. Then...Then maybe, just maybe, he'd still be here...He'd laugh and joke until I joined him. He'd tell me, stop being such a grumpy pants, Jon, it's not THAT bad, you can do it, I believe in you. And I-" Jon choked back a sob, tears almost falling. "I don't want to believe he's gone. B-but he is. A-and, God, where ever he is right now, I hope he can here me say that I love him, because I do. I so, so do. I never even realized it was so much until...Until I lost-" And off they go, streaming down his face. "Until I lost him."

"I'm sorry I couldn't save him. I'm sorry I've bored you with my sob-story of a life here. I'm sorry, and I love him. My little demon, Sock."

AN: Did you know I was going to name this "My Little Demon" but I saw another fanfic that had that name so I changed it? Well, now you do. Please don't kill me! THINGS LIGHTEN UP SOON I PROMISE!
Review?
~AP