Chapter 3: Things That Make You Panic

Yukari found herself wide awake at 2:25 in the morning. Damned Hiro. He was sleeping like he was dead. So unfair.

She stepped out of the room and into the kitchen, taking a seat at her kitchen table with a glass of milk. "Why won't you sleep…" She grumbled to herself, when she noticed that her cell on the table was blinking.

New Text Message.

She opened it to find a picture flashing up on the screen. Arashi was fast asleep on the couch with Erica in his arms, also asleep.

Yukari leaned her cheek onto her fist. I wonder if I should have kids… I'm not getting any younger, and it's not like I'm getting as much work. Hiro has a steady income, so even if I stay at home, it wouldn't be too bad… She paused, imagining her life as a mother. I don't know if that's the kind of life I'd be into. I don't know if I'd be able to handle sitting around all day. I've been caught up in work for most of my life.

She looked at the wall, remembering her own mother's attitude. Would she be one of them? She'd always heard that people become their parents. She certainly didn't want her daughter to run off with a guy like George.

George…

She was thinking of him again. How frustrating… "What am I gonna do with him…" She whispered, placing her fingers to her temples.

She got to her feet. "I wonder if he's at the atelier… I should decline his offer to do his show, at least until he stops acting weird. I don't need to be associating with him."

She didn't know what she'd do if she'd continue to be surrounded by him in spirit and scent.

-

She'd left a note on the table, telling Hiro that she needed some air so she went for a drive. Not a complete lie, but not the complete truth.

She zoomed down the road in her convertible, raven strands of hair fluttering behind her. The cold never seemed to bother her. It was something one got used to after doing bikini shoots in it. She certainly didn't look the part of a model in her jeans, white tank-top, black coat and boots, but the experience was still there.

I probably should have at least put on makeup… She thought, and then wondered why she had thought it. What difference did it make if George saw her without makeup. Why did she care if she was looked older without it? She wasn't out to impress him anymore.

Frustrated, she slammed the car door and started down the steps. The surreal feeling she got as she approached the door had not faded from the last time. This was the only place where she could step into her past and be eighteen and free again… It was not as pleasant a feeling as she wished it was.

However, when she stepped inside, she found not George, but a strange man sitting at the bar, kneeling over a cup of tea. He was wearing cheap clothing; brown slacks, white button-down, tennis shoes. A rather frilly coat was laying in the empty seat next to him. He had curly purple hair, yanked back in a tight ponytail.

"Um…" Yukari mumbled, wishing she had brought a weapon. Did she lock the door last time she came by? Did George lock it when he left?

The man turned to her, showing her a sad smile. "Hello, Caroline."

The voice used was deeper, but she recognized it immediately. "Isabella?"

Isabella, or rather Yamamoto Daisuke, turned his attention back to his tea and brushed fresh tears off of his cheeks. "It's been so long since I've seen you. I wish I could be more civil… There's tea on the stove if you'd like some."

"What are you doing here at this hour?" Yukari asked, immediately sitting next to Daisuke and placing her hand on his shoulder.

"Oh… well…" She gave a half-hearted laugh. "George got upset with me for messing up his concentration. Then, he started blaming me for his nose starting to bleed and getting it on the dress he was working on. After a few minutes of arguing, he demanded his dresses back and kicked me out."

He sighed, taking a drink from the tea, trying to keep his composure. "So, I left. I didn't want to upset him anymore than he already was. I don't know what would've happened to him if I did."

"Isabella…" Yukari sighed. "You can't just let him do whatever he wants."

"I know that… I've been keeping him in line as much as possible, but ever since his mother died, he's become a monster. I'm going to go to his father tomorrow and ask him to cut George off from his funds. I may not be able to stop him from doing what he pleases, but his father can. I take care of his earnings from jobs, so at least for a few days he won't be able to afford anything."

"Is he that bad with money?"

"Lately, yes. It just disappears. If he was eating, we wouldn't be able to afford food for both of us on my salary. I've been paying for classes, but I dropped out today because I wanted to stay at home and keep an eye on him… I know all there is to know anyways. You learn more from experience than you do from any silly book."

Yukari poured herself a cup of tea and returned to the seat. "I'd be lying if I said I haven't been concerned. Why does he just waltz back into my life and start controlling me? I don't have time for these stupid games anymore… but there's a part of me that won't allow me to stop… Maybe I'm just worried what will happen to him if I do, just like you."

"How is your life going, Caroline? Surely it's going well… You shouldn't let George spoil it for you.."

"Everything is… fine. Everything's perfect," She smiled, but felt it fade from her lips. "Almost too perfect. Something's gonna go wrong."

Isabella looked into Yukari's eyes. "Don't let it happen to you, Caroline." Hesitation. "Don't go near George again, for your own good."

"Eh? But, he wants me to model for-"

"Take it up with me," Isabella said, writing a number down on a slip of paper and handing it to her. "For now, the show isn't a guarantee. I'll keep you up to date, so please, stay away from George."

"But…"

Isabella touched her hand. "It's not that he's a threat to your life… Please don't think you need to call the police or anything like that. You're more of a threat to him than the other way around."

A threat?

"Isabella… do you need a place to stay? I have an extra room at my apartment if-"

"Oh, no, no. I already spoke to Arashi, and he said it was all right if I just stayed here until I found a place of my own. This is the closest to a home I've ever felt, so I'm much obliged to stay. Thank you for your offer, however. If I change my mind, I'll let you know…"

She was so different, Isabella… it wasn't just the absent makeup and frills and jewelry. She seemed hollow, defeated. She wasn't Isabella. She was Daisuke, the awkward, confused little boy who was not accepted by others and didn't know if he was a woman or a man. The one who had given her that confidence, the one she believed in, had just let her down and shoved her out into the cold.

"Well, let me know if you need anything," Yukari told him, getting to her feet.

"Caroline."

She paused at the door.

"You came here because you thought George would be here."

She didn't respond.

"You did." She smiled.

"Okay, so I did… but I was just going to tell him to leave me alone! Well… kind of…"

Isabella turned away. "Sleep well, Caroline."

"Goodbye, Isabella."

-

"God, George has become such a bastard," Arashi grumbled. Miwako, he, and Yukari had gathered at their kitchen table to have a 'meeting'. "What the hell is his problem, anyways? Kicking out Isabella… after all she's done for him! I ought wail on 'm."

"Arashi," Miwako scolded, checking over her shoulder to make sure Erica wasn't listening to her father's vulgar words.

She wasn't. She was entertaining herself by playing with pots, pans, and two spoons.

"Isabella frightened me," Yukari told them. "She told me to stay away from him. For his safety… How am I dangerous?"

"All beautiful women are dangerous," Arashi explained, as if the answer was obvious.

"Please, George gives off the impression of some kind of spy…" Yukari griped. "And with his attitude problem, I can get why he would be dangerous… but Isabella seems to think that I may do something bad to him… I guess…"

"Perhaps not something bad," Miwako said. "Maybe… no…" She looked at the tabletop. "No, no. Miwako is wrong."

"Wrong about what? Enlighten us," Arashi said, leaning back in his chair and throwing his feet up on the table.

"You don't think George is… well… still in love with you, do you, Caroline?"

Arashi's chair fell over, sending him to the floor. Yukari did a spit take with the tea she had been drinking.

"Wh-wh-what?" Yukari exclaimed. "As if! Come on, Miwako, that's ridiculous! It's been over ten years, and he never actually loved me…. Just… desired me. That's all."

"Who knows what George feels…" Arashi complained. "Nobody gets that guy. He's just a psychopath."

"Maybe he's finally snapped," Yukari suggested flatly.

"Maybe… Maybe someone should talk to George, instead of all of us talking around him."

All eyes turned to Miwako.

"Is it really fair to leave him out of the loop? It is about him after all."

"…I guess that's true… but… George doesn't seem to be willing to tell anyone anything. He'll talk for hours but never actually reveal a word…" Yukari mumbled, looking down into her cup.

"Then we should beat it out of him."

"Arashi! Violence isn't he answer!"

Yukari looked up. "I'll talk to him."

"Eh?" Both of them exclaimed. "But Isabella said-'

"I know, I know… and because of what she said, I'll keep my guard up, but I know that if I try, I can get George to talk to me."

"Well, I'm gonna go with you," Arashi replied. "If things get outta hand, it's better if someone is there."

"I can handle George," Yukari scoffed.

"Yeah, but if Isabella is right, can George handle you?" Miwako asked.

Yukari barely slept again that night.

-

It was that evening after work when Yukari's phone rang. "George…" She mumbled, checking the caller ID. Calling now? On her way home?

"Moshi-moshi."

"Yukari, I've finished some of the outfits. I want you to bring over some of your model friends so I can see if they should wear them."

She hesitated. "Not today, right?"

"Oh, no, no. Tomorrow… maybe the next day. I don't know, whatever works for the models. I've got plenty of time to kill."

She paused again, realizing her chance. "Where do you live?"

Arashi had wanted to come with her, but she wasn't going to pass up an opportunity to come face to face with him and confront him while he was off guard. If she continued with her wait-and-see attitude, things were bound to spiral out of control.

-

George stripped of his clothing and turned on the bath. He didn't really feel like taking a bath, but people had begun to notice his hygiene was beginning to plummet, and he didn't want anything to arouse suspicions and force them to search his home. Not that he had a problem… but as far as he knew, meth was still an illegal substance.

He turned suddenly, swearing he saw blue butterflies out of the corner of his eye, but there was nothing there. It wasn't as if he hadn't seen the illusion before, so he shrugged it off.

The water was warm and tingling against his skin. He scrubbed at his skin, but it just didn't seem clean enough, so he kept scrubbing until it hurt.

Those damned butterflies. He looked up again. Nothing.

"Someone's in my house…" He grumbled suspiciously, but that was impossible… Isabella was gone, and he'd taken Kaori's key at some point… did she have a key? He couldn't remember… but he had made sure to lock the door, didn't he? He couldn't remember that either.

His attention was turned back to two legs standing in the water in front of him.

"George…"

He looked up, feeling his stomach catch in his throat. This couldn't be…

Mother.

But she was…

"GEORGE!" She shouted.

He screamed, panicking and threw his arms up in front of him in defense. She was wearing the same dress she had been wearing that night… That skeletal form that used to be his mother, that still was his mother… Her eyes glared down at him with hate.

George practically fell out of the bath, shoulder hitting the floor rather hard.

There were butterflies everywhere.

-

She waited a few hours. She ate dinner with her husband and waited for him to fall asleep. She kissed him on the forehead and waited to make sure he was still out. Waiting and waiting and waiting…

And then she slipped on her coat, pulled back her hair, and left for George's apartment.

As she maneuvered her way through the streets, an uncomfortable feeling settled in the pit of her stomach… She didn't like it…. It was that kind of feeling a person got when they knew they were about to step into something really horrible… like if they had a feeling someone was sick or someone was angry or someone was…

She found the place without any issue, which was shocking considering George had prattled out a couple dozen unnecessary details about how to get there.

Maybe I should have called Arashi, She thought as she took a spot in front of the elevator and waited for the doors to open. She had to have been stubborn and decided to solve the problem herself… but really, she was hoping to not get anyone else involved in the misery that George had begun to cause on everyone. He'd alienated everyone. Every last one.

So who better to confront him than someone who'd long since been alienated from him? That was her logic anyways.

When she reached the door, she knocked.

No response.

George…

She rang the bell.

No response.

She knocked again.

And again.

And she rang the bell again.

No response.

She grabbed the knob.

Unlocked.

She stepped into the apartment cautiously, looking around the front room for any sign of him. There wasn't any. She felt sick to her stomach.

She padded barefoot through the room and down the hall but stopped almost immediately when she reached the bathroom. The carpet was wet… like…

She opened the door to find no one inside, only that the bathtub had overflowed considerably. "Aw, jeez…" She grumbled, turning it off and letting out the drain. On the inside, she was relieved to find he hadn't drowned himself. But… where was he…?

A flutter came to her chest. One of fear. One of worry… and then she felt like she was going to pass out. "GEORGE?!" She shouted, her voice cracking. Where was he? Where was he? Where was he?

She found herself running down the hall, fighting back tears. I should have called Arashi… I should have had him come with me… I don't want to do this by myself anymore! I'm afraid!

She slammed open his bedroom door. There was blood on a corner of his dresser, and the scent of his cologne was so strong it made her eyes water. The bottle sat on its side on the same bloody dresser. It had been dumped onto the carpet and also on…

"George!" She yelped.

There he was, naked, underneath his work desk. He sat with his knees up to his chin, his hands clutching to his hair, and he was sobbing. There was a bloody wound on his forehead, where it had apparently collided with the dresser. "Get away from me!" He gasped, but he wasn't looking at her.

Yukari exhaled a shuddered breath and approached the desk, kneeling down before him. "George," She tried to remain calm, "There's no one here but me."

He looked into her eyes. George's natural eye color was brown… "But…" He tried, but it seemed that when he looked back to the empty spot he had been yelling at, it was nothing but that.

"George," Yukari tried to keep him focused.

"You shouldn't be here either!" He shouted at her, retreating further under the desk. "Why are you here?"

"I was worried about you…George, please, come here. You're hurt," Yukari coaxed. It was like he was a cat behind a shelf… how frustrating… but she wasn't about to make any sudden movements. He really had lost it.

She reached out her hand and took his wrist gently. His wrists were so thin, just like the rest of him. "Come on, George. It's me, Yukari."

As his arm went limp, allowing her to pull him out from under his hiding place, she felt the heat from his skin, she saw the redness on the inside of his arms, saw the injection sites…

That can't be what I think it is… She thought.

He was free from his hiding place, but he seemed more lost now than ever. "You came here for me…" He said looking at her after nervously eyeing the room for any sign of whatever he was looking for. "You came here to stop her."

"Stop who?"

He seemed to be hit by a dizzy spell, brought on by more than just the head wound, and he collapsed on top of her.

"Agh!" She shouted, feeling some sort of déjà vu wash over her. Hadn't he thrown her down on his floor at some other point during their life?

He looked down at her, and the event seemed to strike him as familiar too. "Yukari." It was as if he just recognized her.

She smacked him, just like back then. It wasn't something she had wanted to do. It probably wasn't a good idea. But she did it. Strictly out of instinct, she did it.

But his response was far different from before.

He buried his face into the nape of her neck, and through the cloth of her coat, she heard him say….

"I love you."

"Stay away from George. It's not that he's a threat to your life… You're more of a threat to him than the other way around."

Isabella was always right.