BONUS CHAPTER – Algaliarept punishes a fanfiction writer for making him too nice. The inspiration for a demonic custody battle just wouldn't come tonight, so Al came to help me and this was what came out. Many apologies, proper chapter in a few days.

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house,

Nothing was stirring not even –

Well actually, the horny fanfic writer whom you know as WeatherEye1 was stirring. All the presents had been wrapped and all the terrible televisual programming had been watched. Unfortunately there were no mince pies left out for Santa and no carrot for Rudolph because Weather was grumpy. Her man thing had gone away to spend Christmas Eve with his family, leaving our heroine at the mercy of her own relatives. The carrots had been placed safely out of reach (because if one more person asked about Weather's "weight problem", aforementioned root vegetables were going where the sun don't shine(she wasn't bothered by being tubby, but her family seemed to find it irksome)) and the mince pies had been consumed by someone who didn't care if she was fat, she was-

Enough about size issues. The point is, Weather was up and tapping away at her keyboard and missing out on her festive cheer. All evening she had been trying to slip away and write a chapter of Drunk on the Lines, but the family kept stopping her and there were presents to be wrapped and pies to be eaten. Then, when all others had gone to bed, Weather had been far too stressed to write her next chapter. So she sat and wrote filler and hoped that inspiration would strike.

What our slightly rotund heroine did not know was that there is a certain magic in the air on Christmas night. The ley lines tingle and glow and even without second sight you can sometimes see them in the old and the wild places on dark nights with bright moons. This Christmas Eve was just such a night, though Weather did not know it. So, as she tapped away, Weather forgot all caution and whispered a name into the cinnamon scented air.

"Algariarept" it rushed from her like the cold winter wind and wound its way through the heavy night and into the lines, not stopping until it had stroked up against the ears of a certain male demon by the very same name. The demon raised his head to sniff the air and, scenting cinnamon, chuckled menacingly to himself.

Not a moment after her casual utterance, Weather felt the world pop and shift around her. Sat on the bed, where before there had only been empty air, was a man. Dressed in a green frock coat, frilly shirt, top hat and grey smoked glasses he seemed rather out of place in the tiny, pink guest bedroom of the family home.

"You called?" Al said, pulling on his lace cuffs and looking around the small room, barely hiding his disdain. All Weather could do was gape and shake her head.

"Oh you did call me little writer, so I'm here to help fill in the gaps on your page." The demon leered, picking up the discarded laptop and beginning to read through incomplete chapter.

Weather backed up as far as she could go and, in her mind, swore off mince pies forever. Algaliarept was tutting over a point in the demon legal system and she wondered whether she could just sneak out and leave him to it. Scooting to the edge of the bed, Weather was about to make her escape when Al grabbed her foot and held it fast.

"Oh no, no, no my dear. You've been a very bad girl this year. In this… drabble of yours I'm coming across as far too nice," Al paused and closed the laptop, sliding it away under the bed. Weather stopped breathing.

"I think I'll just have to show you how nasty I can be" said the demon with his dark smile and mouthful of blocky teeth.

"Yes, you've been very naughty indeed."

Finis