Author's Note: Was something funny, or did a joke fall flat? I'd love to hear!

Chapter 3

They were sat in his office, drinking tea. After yesterday they'd both been fed up with conversations, and had thus decided to postpone this meeting until today. Had Severus had his way, though, this meeting probably never would have happened.

Hermione was once again without her Glamour, and sat in front of Severus' office desk in jeans and a simple cardigan over a t-shirt – it was cold down here. Severus himself seemed to prefer something similar rather than his heavy teaching robes. Dare she admit it, seeing him in jeans and a button-up was always a feast for sore eyes. Though if she told him that he'd probably throw her out of here.

Severus sighed – he did that a lot – and spoke, "That story yesterday?"

Of course he'd ask about that. "Don't worry yourself. When I finished Hogwarts I had a lot of options, but wanted to stay close to the Order. We all took some time off from studying, at least anything that would lead to a job, and I quickly grew restless. I got a couple of apprenticeship offers, but by then I already knew that I'd take up Potions. And frankly? None of the other subjects are quite as interesting. If you think about it they're all foolish wand-waving, to quote you. But potions is different, the odd one out."

He looked thoughtful. "I still don't see why I'd take you on as an apprentice. You are an incredibly obstinate student – and for some reason you like to wave your hands in the air like if you were at a rave."

"Ha! Tell me about it. Nargle-catching, I believe someone once called it. As to why you'd take me on? Well, I wasn't lying before. We are going to be practically best friends. I'm going to be close friends with Minerva too."

He looked down his nose at her. "I sincerely doubt that we'll ever be friends."

Hermione pursed her lips. "And why not?"

"Surely you are already aware of your own flaws."

Why the man had to be so mean eluded her. "Have you ever looked in the mirror yourself?"

Severus' jaw clenched. "Get out."

Hermione crossed her arms in front of her chest. "I'll have you know that we won't be friends. We'll be lovers."

"Do not presume that I'll believe anything that comes out of your mouth just because you know the future." Severus was glaring at her, but trying very hard not to explode, form the looks of it. For that, she was almost thankful. Sadly the tea in the cup in front of him was boiling.

She sighed and looked over his shoulder. "Where I'm at we're just about to cover Liquid Luck."

A few seconds passed before Severus nodded tentatively. "Fine," was his clipped answer.

Hermione was glad to be back at Hogwarts again. It had been nice to have a break, and spending half of her summer at her parents' and the rest at Grimmauld Place had turned out a-okay. But, let's be honest – when she was in school she was in her element. And after the O.W.L.'s last year there were going to be advanced classes – her mouth was practically salivating at the prospect.

They'd arrived last night, and Hermione, Harry and Ron were sat at breakfast chugging down as much food as possible. The boys had slept in a bit late, thus causing this alarming hurry.

Soon they were all sat in the potions classroom again, everybody but Hermione and possibly a few Slytherins looking tepid. Lesson with Professor Snape during the first morning back from summer? No thanks.

Hermione had positioned herself strategically – next to Neville and in front of Harry and Ron. The Slytherins were luckily all sat on the other side of the room. The clock rang 8 Am, and they all waited with bated breaths. Then it said 8:01. Hermione started looking around her, trying to gauge if anyone knew what was up.

And then a blue-haired woman in her early twenties strode into the classroom, wearing a set of billowing teaching robes and scowling darkly at them all. She strode to the front of the classroom and made sure to have everybody's attention before she spoke.

That wasn't particularly hard to achieve. Everyone looked curious.

"This," the woman spat angrily, "this is what happens if you aren't careful when experimenting with Potions."

The classroom went completely silent. Hermione's jaw hit the floor. She put up her hand and said, without being called upon, "Professor?" in a small voice.

"What Granger? And put down that bloody hand before I blast it off!"

Malfoy chose that moment to choke on his own spit. Then he started laughing. The rest of the class followed shortly.

"All you little devils be quiet!" Snape's voice (though it was now much higher-pitched than usual) rang out over the classroom. It took some time, but eventually they all quieted down enough. People still spontaneously burst into giggles, however.

Dean committed a big mistake when he cracked a joke. "So Professor, you finally got to touch a pair of boobs?" The whole class quieted down, anticipating Snape's response. Hermione's eyes felt as if though they might pop out of her head.

And at just that moment Snape, in normal shape and form, walked into the classroom at a brisk pace. "Jane! What in seven hells do you think you're doing!?" He looked very perturbed.

She let out an amused "Oops."

Professor Snape let out a loud sigh and pinched his nose whilst muttering, loud enough for everybody to hear (for the classroom was incredibly quiet), "What the fuck have I gotten myself into?" That must've been the first time Hermione ever heard Snape actually curse. That the Professor should even know such a word, yet alone use it, seemed scandalous to her.

The Professor straightened up and addressed the whole class, looking incredibly annoyed, "This is Jane Blue, my apprentice. She can be incredibly inane. Expect for her to be present during your lessons every once in a while."

Professor Snape took on apprentices? Where did she sign up? The thought of apprenticing had crossed her mind, and she adored Potions. She put up her hand.

"Are you trying to catch Nargels, miss Granger?"

She startled a bit. So Luna hadn't made up Nargels? "No, I'm just wondering about this apprenticeship-thing," there were a few groans to be heard in the classroom, "Do you take on apprentices often? How does one qualify for an apprenticeship?"

The Professor was staring at her with large eyes, and looked to be near the breaking point. Meanwhile, his apprentice was starting to giggle. And giggle some more. And then she began laughing and clutching at her stomach. "Trust me, miss Granger, I am never, ever taking on another apprentice."

Hermione looked dejectedly at her desk when Professor Snape began going through what Advanced Potions meant, and what they'd be working on for the coming weeks. But ever so slowly she returned her attention to the lesson at hand, and simply decided that she'd prove herself to be brilliant at Potions, and if the Professor didn't want her as an apprentice then that was his problem.

Who the hell was even this Jane Blue?