"Now that we are all gathered, and are slightly less likely to kill each other, let the meeting commence," said Confederacy. "The topic on the table is energy, Massachusetts, you have the floor."
"Well, recently I have been investing in clean energy and finding ways to store it and make it easily available to everyone. Specifically, I have been looking into harvesting the energy created by offshore wind and solar power." Massachusetts began.
"As have I," chimed Kentucky, "but I've also been looking into geothermal, landfill gas, and hydroelectric power."
"Ah, shut up Kentucky, just because you're doing more than her doesn't mean that you're doing better!" snapped Colorado, "I for one lead the nation environment-friendly energy development."
"Quit bragging Colorado. We all do our best, well most of us, I'm focusing on expanding my renewable energy in wind and solar, to biomass and such. That's all you really need to know." interrupted Illinois.
"Yes, I too have been expanding my renewable energy resources. I mostly use solar energy, but-" California started, but was interrupted by Texas before he got started.
"God damn, Cali. We don't care about it. You're the golden boy, the special state. Give it up, you're not that special."
"Oh, I'm sorry. Was I bragging? NO, no I was not. So can you please refrain from your base insults. Tell me, what are you doing in regards to renewable energy? Hmm?"
"I'm using coal-" Texas started
"Coal?! Even I know that's stupid Tex. Jeez." snarked Colorado.
"You have the ability to make one of the best wind farms in this nation, and you're wasting it on coal and oil. Have you no shame?" cried Mass, as if this development was a personal affront to her. From that point on, the meeting quickly dissolved into chaos. Illinois and Kentucky left the meeting room for the kitchen once everyone began to argue to deal with their own business.
Confederacy, (let's call him Dixie from now on), knowing that they would be out before the others, had prepared drinks for them. Illinois preferred bourbon from Kentucky, and, strangely enough, Kentucky preferred Canadian whiskey. Dixie was sitting on the kitchen counter with the drinks when they came in.
"Gone off the rails already? They've barely been in there for ten minutes!" smiled Dixie when they had settled and started on their drinks.
"Yea might even be a new record. Quickest to dissolve into an argument. Though Cali and Tex are here, so it might not count. They'd be at each other's throats no matter the situation." said Kentucky in response. "If they get too out of hand, though, Mass is there, so a 13 council wouldn't be too much of a stretch, y'know?"
"Ah. Well, if you two've left, you probably want the room to yourselves then, yes?" began Dixie after a brief pause.
"That would be preferable, yes" nodded Illinois.
Dixie smiled and stood up. "Shall I close the door behind me?" he inquired. Both gave nods to the affirmative, and Dixie entered the meeting room. The door closed behind him with a soft click. No one in the room noticed. California and Texas were fighting like France and England, while Mass and Colorado sat off in the side going over notes, and basically holding the meeting.
Colorado looked up as he sat down next to them. "We've almost gotten everything organized and decided. I think this should be over tomorrow if nothing out of the ordinary happens."
Dixie looked up, Cali and Tex were still at it, and it appeared that the door to the kitchen had been locked while he was assessing the chaos. The table had been broken, and so had a few chairs. He didn't really want to know how that had happened.
"Do ya think they'd ever get along? If they had to work together to survive, do you think they would?" asked Mass suddenly.
"Mass, you know as well as South and me, that the day Tex and Cali work together is the day hell freezes over." snorted Colorado.
Suddenly, there was a crash from the front door. Immediately, Dixie, Mass, and Colorado grabbed the nearest weapon they could find, and surprisingly California and Texas stopped fighting to arm themselves as well. They all turned to face the door to the hallway. Seconds later it slammed open, revealing the intruder. It was Mexico.
"Hola, America. How are you doing?" called Mexico, "I didn't expect to see you here so soon. Or did they kick you out?"
Dixie didn't respond if Mexico thought that he was America, that that might work in their favor. "You heard wrong. Now, I'm gonna to give ya one chance to git out. Or I will whup your ass to Timbuktu." snarled Dixie.
"Ah, ah, ah. See, amigo, I can't do that. You took something of mine, I'm here to take them back." smiled Mexico
"And what exactly did I take that is so important that you had to come now?" asked Dixie.
"Texas and California, of course." Mexico gave a very predatory grin. California and Texas had gone pale at Mexico's statement, but their fear was quickly replaced with indignation and anger.
"Now, look here." snarled Texas, full of an indignant rage, "I don't belong to you anymore. Hell, I haven't been yours since 1835. What on earth makes you think you have the right to come here and expect me to come peacefully back to you?"
California quickly took it from there, "And I left in 1846. That was a hell of a long time ago. Get out. We aren't yours anymore." At this, they both launched themselves at Mexico. Massachusetts quickly ran to help them, as Colorado went to get Illinois and Kentucky, who were still holed up in the kitchen. Dixie went forward to protect Texas.
~~Time Skip~~
"Fuck. This is, this is fucking shit"
"Thanks for your input Illinois." snapped Colorado. "Mexico just took California and Texas! Of course, this is a shit situation."
"Not to mention," added Kentucky sarcastically, "we just trashed the living room. Alfred'll be happy."
"Confederacy, you have America's phone number right?" spoke Massachusetts in a commanding tone.
"Yea, d'you think we should call him? Wouldn't it be better if we told him in person? He has got the meeting right now." countered Dixie
"No, we will call him." noded Mass, taking control of the 5 remaining personifications.
"M'k Mass." sighed Dixie. He dialed Alfred and put the phone on speaker. The phone rolled over to voicemail 'Hello, sorry the Hero can't get to you right now, I'll call back as soon as possible. Thanks for waiting!'
Everyone frowned at this, usually, Alfred picked up his phone immediately.
"I told yall, he's in a meeting." snapped Dixie, "We should just go, 'fore someone comes to investigate."
"No, we should wait a bit more, call him again or something. If he doesn't pick up the second time we'll go to the meeting," responded Mass. The rest of the states didn't argue. They were still in shock, and Mass was very good at taking charge of situations like this.
A few minutes later Illinois called instead. They had moved into the kitchen and were standing around the counter, so everyone could hear and be heard on the other end. Thankfully, this time he did pick up. Until an Italian voice echoed through the phone 'What on earth are you doing beer bastard? We don't even know who that is!'
"Wait, am I on speaker?" asked Illinois, slightly nervous. They just needed to get a message to America, was that so hard?
'Yes, you do happen to be on speaker.' came a very french voice, which was almost immediately rebuked by someone else, with a distinctive English accent, saying 'France, you bloody pervert. Don't try to seduce every damn person you come in contact with!'
At this, Mass paled a bit and cried "Oh, Holy Shit, it's the lobster!" Suddenly there was the distinct sound of someone walking over crushed glass from the front hall.
"Um, well, yall just continue the meeting. Tell Alfred that there's a rather pressing domestic issue. Fuck, we've gotta go. Bye" Said Dixie in a rush. Illinois quickly hung up and began to grab as many weapons as he could hold. Kentucky began to help him. Colorado and Mass opened the door to the garage so that they could all move quickly and efficiently.
"Kentucky, you're driving." Ordered Mass. Kentucky nodded his understanding over an armful of assorted knives.
Once everyone was in the car and all of the spare weapons had been loaded into the trunk Kentucky sped off. He was a wild driver, not as bad as Mass or Cali, but not the safest. He had learned to drive by bootlegging moonshine, so he drove over the speed limit frequently, and took strange routes. But he was never caught, whenever someone asked him how he got away with his driving, he claimed that he was special. In reality, he had some kind of sense, that told him where the best route was at any given time.
"Alright, when we get to the meeting place, Illinois and South, you go and tell Alfred." began Mass.
"Wait, why us?" queried Illinois
"Because South's got that southern charm, obviously, and because you are a master of persuasion," replied Mass. "Look, we're here. The rest of us'll wait in the car. Call us when you're done, alright."
Illinois sighed, got out of the car, and began to walk towards the building they were parked in front of. Dixie followed behind. As they entered the building, they realized that they didn't have the clearance necessary to get past the security.
"Well, what do you suggest, South, since we can't waltz right in?" sighed Illinois.
"Ask the front desk, maybe we can get clearance from them, yea" responded Dixie.
They walked up to the front desk. A pretty young woman was sitting looking at a computer screen, probably making sure that everything was running smoothly. She glanced up as Illinois and Dixie walked up.
"And how may I help you?" she inquired politely.
"We'd like to get into the international meeting that's being held here if you please." began Illinois.
"Sorry sir, that is a private meeting. You aren't allowed in. It will end in a few hours though. You can wait in the lobby." she responded.
"Ah, shame. We haven't got the time to wait. Which room is the meeting in, we'll just let ourselves in." countered Illinois.
"It is a private meeting, sir, you can't go in. If you keep threatening the people here, I will be required to call the police," she responded again, more firmly.
"Now, miss, you have a beautiful face, we wouldn't want it to get messed up, now would we." Illinois hissed, leaning over the desk, "Where is the meeting? Just tell us, and you won't end up somewhere unpleasant. Understood?"
She paled as Illinois took out his gun, "See this miss, we can go out back, or you can tell me where the meeting is. If you don't, I might have to do something rather unpleasant, for you."
"Stop," intervened Dixie, "you're terrifying' the poor gal. Look, miss, I do apologize for his behavior. Since it is obvious that we can't go into the meetin' ourselves, would you be a dear and pass on a message for us?"
"What would the message be? And to whom will it be given?" she said, still rather nervous.
"You will give the message to Alfred Jones, Mr. Jones if you will. You will tell Mr. Jones that the Coyote has stolen the Grape and the Bull. You got that?" ordered Dixie.
"Yes, yes I got that." she sighed.
"Good, now hurry along, or I might just give my partner a free rein to do what he wills." Dixie smiled.
She nodded quickly, trembling in fear, and hurried down the hall to the meeting room. Dixie went to sit down on one of the couches in the lobby, while Illinois went out to the car to retrieve the weapons and the other states. Quickly Colorado, Mass, and Kentucky followed Illinois back into the lobby and began to distribute the weapons.
They looked up when the nations began to file out, looking intrigued and a little nervous. Canada was at the head, leading all of the nations except America, Prussia, and surprisingly, England. The nations looked around the lobby, and upon seeing Illinois and Dixie, began to walk forward.
"Look, I'm sure this will all be taken care of, let's just go, eh?" cried Canada, as Russia began to reach for his pipe, and the other nations seemed to prepare for a conflict.
"Yea, commie bastard. The hero's got this, alright!" said America with an underline of panic in his voice. The other nations seemed reluctant to leave, but the did end up following Canada out the door and to the hotel.
Prussia and England stayed behind with America, as America turned to address the remaining states.
"Well guys, the meeting room'll be open for a few more hours. Should we convene there?" he asked quietly.
"Ahm, Alfred. May I help you?" asked England.
"No, you may not!" shouted Mass, indignant that her former colonizer would be in close proximity to her and her siblings.
"Yes," smiled Alfred, "I'm sure we would all be grateful for yours and Prussia's help here. Thanks for offering." Alfred began to walk towards the recently vacated meeting. "Well guys, you coming?"
Dixie and the rest of the states hurried to catch up, and Prussia and England followed behind. As the door closed behind them America turned to face the two other nations in the room.
"I suppose introductions are in order then." he began, as he accepted the knife and gun from Colorado.