I am so sorry for any grammar mistakes that I make. My laptop sometimes randomly deletes letters and makes it look stupid. I do know how to spell and things, just to clear that up : )

In my dream I do not know where I am. There is a rolling mist and nobody is answering my calls, my pleads to be let out of here. A woman appears in front of me, her hair the colour of chestnuts, in rolling waves, falling just beneath her waist. She hurries past me, pulling her pink coat tightly around her. It is not cold.

"Mami, Mami!" I shout, trying to get her attention but she doesn't turn around, doesn't even slow down. I know I haven't made a mistake. My mother had that coat and that hair. I remember putting it in elaborate styles when I was about ten. It was so soft and smelled like oranges.

"Mami, come back," I yell, trying to run after her. The fog makes it hard, I can barely see ten feet in front of me. I run after her, trying to reach her before it's too late. Before I lose her again.

"Mami," I wail and start to cry. There is the familiar scent of her perfume, lemon and bergamot, more like soap but it's still a lovely smell. I run after her again but then I trip and I can't get back up. All I can do is watch her walk away from me. I remember that there is some places mother's go where daughters aren't meant to follow.

XXX

My ankle hurts like hell. I could barely get up, despite taking another morphine sulphate tablet. They cloud my mind which is why I can't take too many. The only other alternative would be a morphling injection. I only have three and was told to save them for the worst pain. I think I can manage to survive this.

I go to the small lake I found earlier to wash. I manage to peel of the bandage that Mrs Hinell put on me yesterday and find that my ankle is an interesting shade of blue/black. Like an oil slick it goes from the bottom of my ankle to just under halfway up my leg. I press lightly and can feel the congealed blood under the skin. It's like somebody has given it a good smash with a hammer.

I need food. I have a small amount of money and decide to see if there is anywhere in this god-forsaken place to eat. So, packing up my small camp I set off for the boundary.

There is almost nothing left of the town centre, some rubble and a few shops are all that remain of district eight's vast town centre. I pause for a moment; did we do this. By we I mean the Capitol, whose side I am on. They say the districts are evil but now I am not so sure. Now, I have no idea.

While I am waiting in a queue with some people for a drink of water I hear a familiar voice. "Tessa, is that you?"

Oh no. I couldn't have possibly run into him again. I took great pains to avoid the route where we might cross paths. Don't get me wrong, he is a nice person but I can't get close to him. He is the kind of person that you'd feel guilty from taking a present from. I spin around, "Hi Sam," I say brightly, faking a smile.

I notice he glanced down at my ankle, "I could have sworn my mother said no walking for a week." he says sarcastically. I can't stand sarcasm, if it was just him and I, I would deck him.

"Yeah well Sam I couldn't just stay in the forest a week could I? I sigh and then clasp my hands over my mouth. Realising too late that I have let the cat out of the bag.

"Shit Tessa. Why the hell are you sleeping in the forest?" he says, annoyance clear in his voice.

How can I answer this? "Erm, well I sort of have nowhere else to go." I say timidly, cursing myself for being so shy.

"You could have told me," he says softly.

"Well what could you have done?" I snap back.

"Let you stay at my house. How about you come back and stay at mine? You know my family and I'll let you stay as long as you want. My mother won't mind, she likes helping people." he says earnestly.

Before I say no, the word befriend comes into my mind and I bite back my original response, "Are you sure you mother won't mind?"

When he smiles, it's like the first flower in spring, you feel honoured to have witnessed it. It's something you want to keep in a box so you can look at it whenever you want. Sam grabs my arm and pulls my gently along. "She'll be happy to see you again."

XXX

When we walk through the door, Sam's mother is having a very heated discussion with someone on a telephone. When she sees Sam and I she hurriedly whispers something and hangs up. "Hello again Tessa, to what do I owe the pleasure of seeing you again?" Mrs Hinell seems flustered.

Luckily Sam jumps in before I have to explain what I am doing in her house again. "Well Mother, Tessa does not have anywhere to go. She doesn't come from around here and needs somewhere to stay, she has been sleeping in the forest up until now. So I thought that she could stay here, in the spare room. Please mother, we need to help her." He defends. I might hit him again, his mother will think I asked if I could stay here.

Mrs Hinell narrows her eyes, "Thom, come in here and entertain our guest please," she says sternly, "and as for you Sam, I will talk to you in the Kitchen if you don't mind." From the look on her face I think she might explode.

A boy who could only be Sam's brother comes into view. They have the same ragged brown hair, the dimples in the cheeks. "Hello, my name's Thom. I presume you're my little brother's friend," he says, offering me his hand. I shake it and say, "Nice to meet you Thom. My name's Tessa."

He takes his mother's place on the couch as Mrs Hinell drags Sam into the Kitchen. Thom sighs, "Sam's really in for it now. He keeps trying to help people and Mam keeps getting on at him for it, you never know who could be a spy."

Involuntary, I flinch. I can't help it. It's as if when someone mentions the name of the person who you have a crush on. My heart starts to pulsate rapidly in my chest, I start to hyperventilate. Thom doesn't look as if he is on to me. He just looks at me curiously, "Tessa," he begins, "are you feeling alright?"

I shake my head. "Do you have a bathroom I could use please?" my voice tiny. Thom nods and points to a small door on my right. "Be careful," he warns, "We don't have that much hot water left."

In the bathroom I throw up. I throw up anything good that was in my system. I fall to the floor, the toilet cool against my back. The practical part of me says it must be the food I ate that made me throw up but the other part says different.

I hear heated voices coming from the room that backs onto this one. I realise it must be the kitchen. I manage to drag myself up and sit down. So, from my little porcelain perch, I can hear a very heated conversation.

"…. mother, it's not as if she's going to harm anyone is she?" says Sam.

"That's not the point Sam and you know it. With your father being away, there isn't a lot of money coming in. Besides, remember what you're father said?"

"Mother, she's not an idiot, of course she knows about the war. How could you not? Father doesn't need to know either, he's in the Capitol for another six weeks anyway, maybe Tessa will be gone by then?" Sam offers, he's right, I will be long gone with hopefully enough information.

"Sam, I just don't know what to think of you sometimes. I'm glad you want to help this person and she does seem like a very nice girl."

"Oh she is. Please, pretty please?" Sam pleads, I can imagine his little puppy dog face.

"Fine then Sam. But don't you come asking me for anything for at least two weeks. Understood?" she warns and I can hear Sam run away from his mother and in to the living room, my cue to go in.

"Hi." I say to Sam which makes him whirl around to face me, his face breaks into a delightful grin.

"Mother said you can stay!" he smiles and then pulls me down the hallway to what I assume is the guest bedroom.

XXX

Later on I sneak out of the house, It backs on to the forest which is perfect. In my hand I hold a wireless communicator, the one I was given when I graduated the one year course at the academy. I was told it was my lifeline, that if I ever needed anything, this was my first port of call.

I finger the Capitol seal, bright gold against the stark black of the leather case. I flip it open before I can change my mind, and dial the last number called. On the screen comes up a picture of the person I'm dialling, then his actual face. A video call, aint I lucky.

"Sir," I say, nodding my head to the man in the picture.

"What is it, I'm a very busy man?" he snaps and inside I sigh.

"Sir, you told me I had to check in with you after twenty fours hours. Do you not remember sir?" I say, fake concern in my voice.

"Yes, I remember now. Tell me, have you made any contact with anyone yet?" He says, in the voice of a man who has better things to do.

I hesitate, just the slightest bit, "No," I lie, "No sir, I have not made contact with anybody yet."

"Well hurry up, we need information or the districts will win this bloody war, and we can't have that."

"No sir, of course not." I agree half-heartedly.

"Very well then. And Loreza?" he says just as I am about to disconnect the call.

"Yes sir?"

"Stay safe." He rings off.

Loreza, my real name. Normal for the Capitol, flamboyant for the districts. To be honest, I prefer being Tessalie, and not just because of the name.

XXX

If you hold your breath under water and touch your hands to your chest, you can feel your heartbeat. Strong and sure, beating like a hummingbird's wings. It's the only thing that feels sure and strong. When you come back to the surface, you forget about that and try to juggle everything else in your life. Which is kind of like trying to juggle slippery fish, just when you think you've got I clutched firmly in your hand, it falls.

Lying in bed at night is strange. Don't get me wrong, it's a very nice bed, soft and luxurious but the sounds outside the window are too soft. In the Capitol everything is noisy and rumbling whereas here, here there is only the soft county sounds.

I have no idea why I lied to the commander about Sam. Possibly to protect him, but why would I do that? Oh who am I kidding? It was to protect him, protect him from the people who would dig through his family history and find things never meant to be revealed. The people who would put a tail on every member of his family, the people who would possibly kill his father if they knew he was in the Capitol. I owe him that much, to protect him from that.

But the wireless communicator sit in my palm under the pillow. The Capitol seal feels as if it's scorching my skin, burning into me, like the truth.

Sorry that was quite terrible : (