Shadows of the Flock-Chapter 3
By MyNameIsCAB
"Why didn't you save me?"
"I don't know," I cried, falling to my knees before Angel.
"I thought you loved me, Max," she frowned.
"I do, I always will," I insisted.
Angel shook her head. "No Max, you don't know what love is. If you loved me, I wouldn't be dead."
"That's not true," I said.
She shook her head again. "You really screwed up, Max. Even Nudge agrees with me."
"How do you know?"
"Because she told me."
"But you're dead and she is too."
Angel shook her head once more…
I sat up, rubbing my eyes. It was just another nightmare. For the past few days, I had kept asking myself why we couldn't save Angel and Nudge. That question had turned into nightmares.
"Max…" Fang muttered.
I lay back down.
"What's wrong?" He asked.
"Nothing, I'm fine," I assured him. "Sorry to wake you."
"No…You're not all right Max." And he knew that I was lying.
Ignoring Fang, I rolled to my side and faced away from him. I heard him turn to face my back and soon his breath crept up on the back of my neck. "Max…"
"It was just another nightmare about Angel, all right?" I sighed, sounding agitated by his close presence even though I knew I was enjoying it. "Are you happy now?"
"I won't be happy until I know you're okay," he whispered as I felt him draw closer. "Come on, Max. Don't like to me."
I turned to face him and rested my head on his chest. His arm crept around me. "Everything will be all right in the end, Max."
With that, I fell asleep really hoping that someday we might be okay.
Death is actually a strange thing, once you think about it. It was like the person or people who died were just there and then they were swept away in a snap. A flick of the wrist. Almost.
I was standing by Nudge and Angel's graves like I did most mornings, but today the sun had already risen over the red rocks and the horizon. Right now, I found a happy moment with Nudge and Angel and engrained it in my memory. I didn't ever want to forget them.
A smile grew across my face as I remembered them silently. All the things we've been through and it had come down to this. Sure, it was sad, but there were a lot of things that I would never forget doing with them.
It seemed like it was just the other day when we were flying before Nudge got shot and she and Angel were racing ahead to see who was faster. Now it slipped my mind who had won, but they had been so happy laughing together along with Gazzy. Slowly, I bent down and placed a rose next to each marker.
"I miss you two," I whispered.
A warm gust of wind brushed the hair out of my face as I stood up. Perhaps it was just a coincidence, but I was positive that it was Nudge and Angel, somewhere up there racing in heaven.
Mom dropped Fang and I off at the grocery store. She had to go to her veterinarian office to pick up some documents and papers she had to fill, but left us to buy a few things she had forgotten the other day that Gazzy had wanted.
"We're making cookies again?" Fang asked, looking at the list.
"Apparently," I replied.
He grabbed a bag of chocolate chips and dropped them in the shopping cart. I grabbed a carton of milk when someone bumped into me. It was one of the boys that went to Ella's school.
"Sorry," the boy muttered. "Hey, don't you know Ella?"
I shrugged. "What's it to you?"
"Nothing, just thought I recognized you as one of her friends or family or something," the boy said.
Fang came up next to me with the shopping cart.
"Well, bye," the boy ran off. Fang must have scared him away.
"Ella's friend," I murmured.
Fang said. "He recognized you?"
"Guess so," I sighed. "Doesn't matter, let's go get eggs."
I followed Fang to the eggs and we picked out a dozen of them in a box. We moved quickly down the aisles to find the candy aisle and pick out some candy that Gazzy liked. Fang grabbed licorice, smores bars, and snickers. I got some gummy worms too.
"Let's go pay, I think I saw Mom's car," Fang said.
As I followed Fang, I saw that boy Ella knew watching us. Mentally, I wasn't ready to think about that boy so I blocked him out. My emotions were still spinning, but I got the feeling that Fang didn't like how that boy gazed at me because he took the line to pay furthest from the boy.
I sat silently in the back of Mom's car with Fang. My arm rested against his lightly, but his leg intentionally rested on my own.
Now that I thought about it, I hadn't really been anywhere public since Angel's death. We had a private funeral at home and that's where we had stayed. Maybe some fresh air away from home had cleared my thoughts because I was no longer getting caught up in feeling bad about Angel and Nudge's death. Something told me that I couldn't stay planted in one place forever.
When we arrived home, Gazzy was standing over his sister's grave, flowers in his hand. We went into the house and watched him through the window silently. It appeared he was talking to Angel. Every now and then he would wipe his eyes until he finally placed the flowers down and stood there, unmoving for another minute.
"I wanna cry watching him," I admitted.
I felt Fang's hand on my leg. "I feel bad for him too."
"You should have heard him last night," Iggy said as he stumbled in. "Cried himself to sleep."
I sighed, wishing there was more I could do for Gazzy. When he headed back towards the house, we quickly moved to the family room and Iggy flipped on the TV. I took a seat next to Fang.
"He'll probably go to his room," Iggy said. "He's been out a few times."
Of course, Iggy was right. Gazzy walked past us and to his room, slamming the door behind him.
The sound of his sobs could be heard shortly after.