3. Root

Hisoka could never say what his identity stemmed from, what the root of everything he did and thought was. He had never felt or noticed his transformation until he had slowly come to the dawning satisfaction that he was no longer the impoverished orphan.

He was no longer weak.

He would never be weak again. He would die before that happened.

No, that wasn't quite right. He'd kill everyone before that happened. If it came to it, he would take everyone down with him as he sank back into the depths of misery.

Hisoka knew that he would never be able to weaken again – to return to that weakling that was forced down beneath everyone else. But for Harry –

For Harry, he could soften. He could let Harry in because Harry had never feared him, had never judged him, had always put Hisoka first before anything else.

And Hisoka loved him for that – loved him far more than even waiting for fruits to ripen, more than fighting and taking the blood of those strong enough to oppose him. For Harry, he would give everything.

And for Harry, Hisoka began to look for the root.

Hisoka knew everything started in his childhood. He knew that when his beggared parents had left him in an alley, uncaring of his fate, that he had been forever changed. He had called himself an orphan from that point on. (After all, having no parents was better than having parents that had left him for dead.)

Knew that years on the streets alone and terrified had taken its toll.

Knew that years being stomped on and crushed under the feet of the strong.

Knew that he had learned to lock his emotions away – emotions were weak in this world.

Knew that in this world it was kill or be killed – eat or be eaten (predator and prey).

In the end, all that was left was bloodlust and find someone strong and crush them.

At least with Harry, he could be something more than just a killing machine, more than just the monster everyone else knew him to be.

With Harry, he could be soft.

Well…

With Harry, he could conquer the world.

(But the paperwork…no thanks.)

Notes:

Hisoka may seem really out of character in this chapter, but his past was never explained. All that we know about his past is that he came from a poor family (so, obviously, I decided to expand on that). And, well, like I stated earlier, Hisoka is obsessive but at least he knows that and he does love Harry (at least in my story).

Sorry for the rather slow update, I work a lot more on my other Fifty story (Fifty: Harry Potter and John Watson) so check that out if you haven't already.

Reviews are my inspiration (please review).

Thank you for reading.