Here's the third chapter. I promise I haven't forgotten about this. School's just been pretty bitchy since it's the first few weeks, plus marchingband. Yea yea, but we totally kick butt so don't hate. The fourth chapter will be following soon. Enjoy.

"Maybe you should go to a doctor."

I lifted my head up slightly from my folded arms and looked at Freddie through half-closed eyes. I was sitting at one of the picnic tables they have outside of our school with my headphones around my neck. Bullet for my Valentine was blasting through them, which probably wasn't really helping the pain currently throbbing in my head, but I loved they're songs. I could listen to them even with blinding pain coursing through me.

"No I don't." My head fell back onto my arms.

"Carly, you've been getting these attacks for two months now, something must be wrong."

Something is wrong, very very wrong. And there's only one thing that can fix it.

"It's not that big of a deal. They don't happen all the time."

"But they happen enough. Have you told Spencer about them?"

God, of course not. Was he stupid?

"No, and I don't plan too."

I looked up when Freddie didn't say anything. He had given up, thank god, but I knew it wasn't the last time we would have this conversation.

The attacks had become even more worse. It started out as a dull throb in the back of my head. I didn't think anything of it. But soon I was getting migraines, and then they grew into full on pain coursing through my entire body. They would get so bad that I would have to curl up into a ball on my bed and wait for the pain to stop. Sometimes it would last five minutes, sometimes five hours. I don't know what caused the difference in time, but I think I know what trigger them.

Sam.

Of course, it was her. Everything was about her. No matter what I did, everything would just come right back around to her. God, it's like no matter what I do, she's always in the back of my mind, like the dull throb that never leaves.

I've tried medicine, but all that does is dim it down, and then after it wears off, the pain comes back ten times worse. I found that if I just wait it out, I can go two or three days without another attack. Unless, of course, I see her, or hear her voice in the hallway.

What did I do to deserve this?

When I first told Freddie about them, he thought it was because of stress. I believed that too because high school is so much worse than middle school, but I think it was wishful thinking. Freddie only knows about half of the attacks I've had. I don't want to worry him too much, so I usually leave out the ones where I end up crying my eyes out and biting my pillow to stop me from screaming out in pain. Thankfully I've only had five of those, and they've all been at home. I don't know what I would do if one of those happened at school. Everyone would probably think I'm crazy. Well, they already do, but they'll think I'm crazier. Not that I care or anything because I don't.

I haven't had an attack in awhile. I've only had the pleasure of having a headache for five days straight, but no mindnumbing, tortuous, full-body pain. I've been grateful, but I know it's only a matter of time before I see her or hear her voice. But I'll take this respite.

"So..."

I looked at Freddie. He was grinning at me.

"What."

"Do you like Tom?"

Oh boy, here we go again.

"I don't know. Why?"

"Well, I was talking to him, and he thinks you're cute."

I shrugged my shoulders. Who cares.

"Oh come on, Carls, it's Tom. Hott, gorgeous, sensitive Tom. I thought you'd be jumping for joy."

"If you think he's so great, why don't you date him?"

He laughed. It's weird that Freddie's voice has gotten so deep. He's completely lost that little nerdy boyish charm he had. In all honesty, he was right up there with hott Tom. Too bad he was taken. Lacy had seen to that.

"I would, but you know, I've always found boobs so much more appealing."

Oh god. Teenage boys can be so immature.

"And besides, why would I want to date him when I have all I ever wanted in this beautiful girl right here?"

Cue in Lacy. She always had a knack for showing up whenever Freddie and I are talking. You know, she was better before she started dating Freddie. Now she just thinks that I'm trying to steal her man from her even after both Freddie and I have told her that we're just really good friends. Girls are so bitchy when they have a boyfriend.

"Hey baby."

Oh please, it was so cliche. I hate pet names. They're stupid and insignificant. We were given names when we were born for a reason. Why would you want to call someone baby or cutie or...cupcake...damn it.

"Hey Lace. I missed you."

I turned my head to the side to give them privacy while they kissed. Freddie kept it brief, thank god, and pulled away from her blushing.

I just grinned back. I was glad that Freddie had found someone. Lacy was sweet, even if she was a little jealous.

"Geez, you guys need to get a room." Tom grinned at me as he sat down across from us. He really was gorgeous, and I noticed a lot of girls sitting in their clicks at the other picnic tables look at him wistfully.

"Ha ha. You're just jealous cause you haven't gotten any in years."

"Ask your mom what she was doing last night, Lacy, then you'll know."

I laughed as Lacy smacked his arm. Tom winked at me.

"So," Freddie began. "It's Friday, and I really don't want to go home. My mom's having her friends over for their book clup meeting thing. You guys want to do something?"

"Sure, as long as Carly goes. I don't want to have to sit and watch you two make out the entire night. I don't think my stomach can handle it."

Freddie blushed. That was one thing that never changed. You could always rely on Freddie and his blush.

"We could go to the mall. Hot Topic's just got these new pants that I really really like."

Ooo, I could never turn down a good shopping spree. "I'm in. That would be fun, and I need new shoes anyways." That wasn't necessarily true, but a girl could use some more shoes.

Freddie sighed. "Fine, I guess the mall it is."

Here's a new thing about Freddie. He's totally and completely whipped.

--

We dropped our stuff off at our apartments, Tom and Lacy lived in the apartment complex across the street next to the Groovy Smoothie, so it worked out well, and headed off to the mall. Lacy and I led the guys around for awhile, stopping here and there, taking the longest in Hot Topic, but then after awhile, Lacy took off with Freddie to Victoria Secret. She wanted to get his opinion so she dragged him away while he was blushing furiously. Tom and I were laughing hysterically while he silently pleaded for our help. We just told them that we'd meet them there.

We walked through the hordes of people that came to malls on Friday afternoons. Most of them were high schoolers and we saw some people that we recognized. All the girls that I saw glared at me because I was walking with hott Tom and they weren't. I couldn't help but feel a little smug, so I got a little bolder. He put his arm around my shoulder as we talked and laughed and I leaned into him. I was definitely flirting, and I would probably regret it later, but my mind was completely free for the first time in weeks. And the throbbing in my head became a weak pulse in the back of my mind.

I was so caught up in my freedom that I didn't notice the group of girls that we were getting closer too. I was laughing at something Tom had said, suddenly everything he said was hilarious, and my arm was around his waist. His arm was casually draped over my shoulders. We probably looked like we were a couple.

"Well, if it isn't Emily the Strange." I looked up. Mandy had appeared in front of us, and her arms were crossed. She looked mad, but I didn't understand why. I never even talk to her.

"Shut up Mandy." I couldn't help but smile. He really was very sweet.

"Oh, Tom! Hey, you should totally come with us. We're going to a party later, and I'm sure you wouldn't want to hang out with such a loser." She glared at me, but still managed to smile and look up lasciviously at Tom. I have to say, the bitch has some skills.

"Gee, I don't know." He rolled his eyes towards me. I gave him a small smile, but it disappeared the second he looked away. I had just realized that this was Mandy. Mandy as in Sam's friend. As in, she was right there. Right in front of me. Again. And I hear the tinkling of chains, bringing me back to my enslavement.

"I'd rather hang out with Carly thanks."

I couldn't help it, but my eyes just found hers, like they used to do in the hall, in the classroom, in my room, in my bed...

Fucking headache.

"Look Tom, you're hott, I'm not going to lie, but what I don't understand is why you stoop as low as to hang out with trash like her."

I looked down and pulled my jacket tighter around myself. I suddenly felt cold and I just wanted to sink into the floor. I could feel her eyes on me.

"You could have any girl you wanted, and I know you know that. So why do you put yourself through such torture? Come with us. We're what you want." Throughout this speech, Mandy had somehow made her way up to Tom and she now had her hands on his chest. If I wasn't so torn up, I probably would have laughed at his expression.

"God, Mandy, you want to know why I don't hang out with girls like you? It's because you're disgusting. You throw yourself at guys just to be popular. You're just a fake bitch. Now leave Carly and me alone!" With those last words, he took her wrists and shoved her away from him. Not enough for her to fall, unfortunately, but enough to make her stumble. Brittany and Sarah steadied her and immediately started sucking up to her saying that he was lying. Sam just stood there, but I couldn't feel her eyes on me. I glanced up at her, and, a second later, she looked up at me too as if it was rehearsed.

"Come on, Carly, let's go." I felt a light tugging on my arm, but I couldn't pull away. I was caught in her blue eyes, and no matter how I tried, I couldn't look away.

Why was this happening? She didn't like me, didn't want anything to do with me, but here she was, staring at me with a look so intense that my heart shuddered to a stop. She was looking at me with deeper feeling than before everything had happened. I was confused. It didn't make sense.

"Carly...come on."

Tom, think Tom. I blinked, and then the spell was broken. She looked away and headed to where her "friends" had gone without a look back. I watched her walk away from me, again, and my heart clenched.

"Carly?" I tore my gaze from her back and looked up at him, and his eyes widened. "Hey...hey." His voice softened, I didn't understand why.

"What?"

"Carly, you're crying."

What?

"What?" I reached up to my cheeks, and sure enough, tears were slowly making their way down my face. He put his arms around me and pulled me to him. My body, feeling the support, collapsed and I buried my head into his chest.

"Hey, it's okay." He rubbed my back almost lovingly and placed his head gently on mine. We fit almost too perfectly. Something was still off though, but for now, it was good enough.

"Don't listen to anything that they say. They're just saying those things to make them seem better than you."

Hah, he thought that Mandy's words had hurt me.

My tears began to slow down and I slowly stepped away from him.

"Carly..." I didn't look up. I just stared at our feet.

"Carly...look at me." When I didn't move, he took his hand and lifted my chin until I was staring him dead in the eye.

"You are not trash and you're not a freak. You are beautiful and unique and if anyone ever tells you otherwise, they're lying and don't know anything about you."

And then, I did something that changed everything for me.

I kissed him.

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